Jewish Post, Indianapolis, Marion County, 25 September 1981 — Page 14

By Dr. Jerome H. Blass

I I a !

The Social Calendar By JEAN HERSC1IAFT

Mayor Ed Koch of New York City presented the Golden Key to the City to P.M. Menachem Begin at an elite reception at City Hall. Although a band on the steps of City Hall played Israeli melodies and Israeli and American flags decorated the scene, it was the men in blue, New York’s police contingent, the largest ever assembled on motorcycles, in patrol cars, on foot as part of the massive security that caught all of the eyes. I found myself in a waiting line to gain entry that included Rabbi and Mrs. Arthur Hertzberg, Israel Singer, World Jewish Congress, top exec.; Councilman Robert Steingut; Rabbi Ben Kreitman, United Synagogue, exec. V.P. and Rabbi and Mrs. Wolfe Kelman. As the group was given entry, seen leaving early was Dr. Gerson Cohen, Jewish Theological Seminary head. Sam Rotbberg, of Peoria, IL, Israel Bonds was chatting 1 ' with Republican Lawyer, Rita Hauser. Then there was New* York Board of Rabbis popular president Rabbi Judah Washer (New Jersey) with exec v.p. Rabbi Paul Halt and Rabbi Israel Mowsbowitz, Queens, N.Y. Zescy Schnur, female head of New York Conference on Soviet Jewry, meeting her husband Jerry Schnur and talking about their children ages one, four and six as they awaited the arrival of Begin.

Meanwhile, Rabbi Seymour Siegel had just flown in from Washington, he told George Klein, industrialist, who is a top Republican leader in the Jewish sphere. Siegel had addressed a Rabbinical Assembly (Conservative rabbis association) of greater Washington area. Having Cocktails: Andrew Stein, New York Boro President, with New York City Controller Harrison Goldin. Both are running in their respective primary to retain their positions. Former Mayor John Lindsay, looking chipper but largely ignored by the large prestigious crowd. Charlotte Jacobson, Jewish Agency, American Section with Rabbi Israel Miller, Yeshiva U. Veep chatting with New York Council head Carol Bellamy, who has already set up a primary campaign to run against Gov. Hugh Carey for the New York gubernatorial hat next year.

Cong. Stephen Solarz greeting Wolfe Kelman. Abbe Kelman, now on the New York District Attorney’s staff (Robert Morgenthau head) who was here too, recently worked as an “intern" in Solarz’ Washington office. Now the daughter of Senator Ted Kennedy has that job. Incidentally, the Kelmans announce they will be grandparents come January of ’82. Son Rabbi Levi Kelman and wife Paula are expecting in Israel. Cong. Mario Biaggi waited in with Begin, as the wall-to-wall guests let out a cheer of love and affection. Begin has already been feted at two luxury receptions given at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel. Saturday night it was the Presidents Conference affair for its members and Sunday night the Synagogue Council of America presented him its Freedom Award.

Overcoming The Fear Of Flying

This column discusses one of the most widespread of all fears — the Fear of Flying. So prevalent is this fear that among Americans alone it has been estimated that there are at least twenty-five million who are afraid to fly. Add to l this the millions of Americans ■ ;» fljV who for one reason or another ^ .U have never had occasion to fly \ and one can safely assume that the vast majority of American fMw adults have never experienced ^ the most modern form of travel Blass and the one which had its origin and its subsequent major development right here in this country. WHATEVER MAKES THESE PEOPLE so fearful, the reasons they give for their fears are generally irrational. There is no typical fearful flyer either. The ranks of the fearful include housewives, actors, actresses, truck drivers, bankers, physicians, and even comedians who make light of everything in life and everybody except their own fear of flying. I knew a comedian who used to rationalize his fear of flying with the humorous quip, “Years ago the birds and I made a deal. I promisee! I would never fly and they promised they would never tell jokes.” Although the remark always brought a laugh, his fear was very real nevertheless, and seriously hampered his career and his earnings. What causes people to be fearful of flying? The obvious answer, of course, is the fear of an accident. Every air disaster reinforces these fears. This is not, however, the full explanation. One can easily point out that in terms of miles traveled without accident, flying is far safer than any other mode of transportation. Even the President of the United States whose life is protected constantly by Secret Service men and bullet proof cars does not hesitate to entrust his life to a plane and in fact has his own plane and helicopter by which he travels routinely when the occasion demands. These arguments and appeals to reason are generally useless because they miss the mark. THE FEARFUL FLYER actually suffers from what we call, “the loss of control” syndrome. Many of us have a little bit of that which comes through from time to time in our fear of bridges, tunnels, trains, or elevators. Flying ac-

tually involves all these fears, the fear of heights, the fear of closed spaces, and the total loss of control all wrapped into one. Give these phobic people a newspaper account of a crash with a few gruesome pictures, throw in a few disaster movies like “The Towering Inferno” or “Airport” with people falling from the heights and you have a confirmed nonflyer for life. How does one overcome these fears? Ob viously, if you are nervous to begin with, avoid disaster movies which will only increase and reinforce your worst fears. Remember, horror movies are intended to horrify the viewer, otherwise they fall flat (pardon the pun). THE FIRST FEW TIMES try to fly with a companion who is an experienced air-traveler and for whom flying holds no fears. Some of the confidence is bound to allay your own worst fears. Be prepared for your flight. By that I mean, take along a good book or an interesting magazine. Where there is nothing to occupy it, the mind has a habit of conjuring up all kinds of fears no matter how remote or improbable they may be. If you are religious you probably know about the Tefilat Haderech, the prayer for travelers. Religious travelers never embark upon a trip without reciting this prayer. Aside from its theological implications the recital of the prayer exerts a very calming and reassuring influence upon those who are in the habit of using it. THERE ARE ALSO A NUMBER of psychological techniques for reducing the fear of flying. One of the airlines in New York actually offers a special course taught by a former psychologist who is now a full time pilot for PanAm. The course basically desensitizes people to the fear of planes by slowly making them more and more familiar with planes and how they work. Finally, instead of avoiding the experience of flying, force yourself to do what you fear most. There is nothing like a successful experience to overcome the fear of flying and begin experiencing the pleasures of long distance travel. Or. Jerome H. Blass, the spiritual leader of the BergenfieldDumont Jewish Center. Is also a licensed practicing psychologist and psychotherapist. Readers are invited to submit topics which they would like him to deal with in future columns. Readers may address their letters to: Dr Jerome H. Blass. 97 Blauvelt Avenue. BErgenfleld. N.J. 07621.

Absent and missed was Mrs. Begin. Although the New York Times reported that she had sustained a heart attack, I was told that she sustained an emphasyma attack that precluded her accompanying Begin. A daughter filled in. Also absent at the Mayor’s shindig was a staunch Israeli supporter, Bess Myerson, a close friend of Koch. Absent was former Sen. Jack Javits. Present and receiving goodbye huges, Eugene Gold, District Attorney from Brooklyn and N - . Y. Conference of Soviet Jewry Chairman. Gold who is retiring at the end of this year is buying an apartment in Israel. In his mid-fifties, he looked fine and dandy. Rabbi Arthur Schneier of the American Section, WJC, greeting New York Senator Alphonse D’Amato, who had brought his mom and dad. He introduced them to many of the Jewish luminaries. He was the only guest present who had brought his parents. “They wanted to meet Mr. Begin,” he said proudly. Black leader Bayard Rustin was present and the first to warmly embrace Begin after his talk. It was a whirlwind few days for Jewish leadership, with many attending several receptions for M.B., even though they had to listen to the same talk again and again — anti-AW ACS and prosecurity agreement with the United States. At the Mayor’s party, guests were in raging fury over Time Magazine’s cover that superimposed Begin’s photo over the Star of David that was formed with “guns”. Later at the Sheraton Center some six organizations including the Presidents Conference, Jewish Community Relations Council, Israel Bonds, ZOA and American Zionist Federation invited some 3500 local leaders to hear Begin as some 10,000 Satmar Hassidim picketed, vocally. Private eruptions of tempers were exchanged by some of the guests and the pickets. Only one injury was reported, hit allegedly by an overzealous policeman.

Just Between Us

By HELEN MINTZ I can't believe she look the whole house, but she did. I can’t believe I had to hire a Uhaul. I can’t believe my daughter started her sec ond year at the country club she calls college, bin she did. Took Mintz two Alka Sell zers. Then 1 believed it! Not that we were anxious for her to leave, but before she stepped out the door her sister took over her bed, her brother hung out a flag and declared his independence, and I removed her chair from around the kitchen table. How final can you get! Not easily daunt ed, she assured us she’d be back. We believe her. WE certainly can't go anywhere unless we pack our belongings in cartons. She took every suitcase. You’d think we were vitcims of a hur

Wiped Out!

ricane. Completely wiped out! WER’RE CONVINCED she'll be more comfortable than at home. There isn't a creature comfort she hasn't made provisions for. Minor sur gery could be conducted just from her drug box alone. If my son didn’t get a hernia from listing it, he never will. Her room, down to the last piece of dust, is more coordinated than our house will ever be. I’m paying for her food, but “poor dear" has to walk to the cafeteria to eat it. So just in case, she took a stocked refrigerator and provided herself with a pantry that puts mine to shame (or is it all mine?) We'll be eating meat loaf for a month till I can break

even.

As a final act of defiance, as we were leaving, we couldn't

resist signing her name on all the activity charts. Little does she know, she was the first to sign up for the volleyball, ping pong, tennis, billiards and swim team. She’ll be so mad at us.

The extent of her activities is putting on makeup, setting her hair, and getting a sun tan. Then she has to rest. Oh. to be 19 again. TROUBLE IS my sister and I can’t remember having such a ball at her age. Was it possible we held a job and took subways to college? Was it possible we shared in the house work at home and our room mates were each other? Was it possible we didn’t get everything we wanted? You know, I think it was possible. Then how come I’ve done a complete about face with my daughter? Is it the times we live in. and the con temporaries we associate with? She’ll probably look back and complain to her daughter.- life wasn’t a bed of roses. I hope not. Meanwhile pass the Alka Seltzer. I think I'm going to need it again. My son just brought home college applica lions!