Walkerton Independent, Volume 34, Number 36, Walkerton, St. Joseph County, 19 February 1909 — Page 3

, - MM— ~~ “WEscapade^ A POST MAKITiL < nQ^Ac^W < ROMANCE by cyrus Townsend bka»y h ^wW® j j, /LLUCT^AT/O/V6 BY Q I RAYWALTERd nfj m (COPYP/GH7 /9OQ 3Y S I Wk UIWA wgS I Z r*~A7/ r~-— T"*~?~T-iY - —1=—1 r<^a

SYNOPSIS. The Escapade opens, not !n the rotnance preceding the marriage of Ellen wlocum, a Puritan miss, and Lord Carrington of England, but in their life after settling in England. The scene is placed, just following the revolution, in Carrington castle In England. The Carringtons, after a house party, engaged in a family tut, caused by jealousy. The attentions of Lord Carrington to Lady Cecily and F<or“ ^trathgate to Lady Carrington compelled the latter to vow that she would leave the castle. Preparing to flee, Lady Carrington and her chum Deborah, an American girl, met Lord Strathgate at two a. m., he agreeing to see them safely away. He attempted to take her to his ■castle, but she left him stunned in the road when the carriage met with an accident. She and Debbie then struck out for Portsmouth, where she intended to Jan tor America. Hearing news of Ellen s flight, Lords Carrington and Seton set out in pursuit. Seton rented a fast vessel and started in pursuit. Strathgate, deeding from fall, dashed on to Portsmouth, for which Carrington, Ellen and Seton were also headed by different routes. Strathgate arrived in Portsmouth In advance of the others, finding that Ellen’s ship had sailed before her. Strathgate and Carrington each hired a small yacht to pursue the wrong vessel, upon which each supposed Ellen had •sailed. Seton overtook the fugitives near Portsmouth, but his craft ran aground, just as capture was imminent. Ellen won the chase by boarding American vessel and foiling her pursuers. Carrington and Strathgate, thrown together by former’s wrecking of latter’s vessel, engaged in an ’impromptu duel, neither being hurt. A war vessel, commanded by an admiral friend of Seton, then started out in pursuit of the women fugitives, Seton confessing love for Debbie. Flagship Britannia overtook the fugitives during the night. The two women escaped by again taking to the sea in a small boat. Lord Carrington is ordered to sea with his ship ■but refuses to go until after meeting Strathgate in a duel. They tight in the grounds of Lord Blythedale’s castle. Encounter is watched by Ellen and Deb'ble, who have reached land and are in hiding. Carrington won a bloodv contest at swords from Strathgate, Debbie and Ellen looking on and praying for the 'latter's husband. Carrington, immediately following the duel, was placed under arrest for refusing to obey his admiral’s orders and Ellen, who had swooned during the duel, awoke to find him gone. Sir Charles Seton found the fugitives, proposed to Debbie and was accepted. Debbie, Ellen and Sir Charles made a plea to the king to spare Carrington. CHAPTER XXL The Little Man of Windsor. There was nothing very awe inspiring in the sight of the plain, homely looking little Dutchman walking under the trees at Windsor; nor was there anything more impressive in the figure ■of the dumpy little woman who walked by his side, but for all that Ellen got down on her knees In the pathway as the two figures approached her. Lady 'Carrington’s example was followed precipitately by Sir Charles and Mistress Deborah Slocum. “Hey!” cried the little man blinking and peering at the three kneeling figures, “whom have we here?” His eye ranged from Ellen to Deborah and nnrehe^ ’ *he baronet kneeling In Mi^nghted ' wiC M.^tan ■\ognition?Tw ! ^*

the army list by heart and most of the •officers appearing thereon, especially those of any degree of rank or station. “Sir Charles Seton, is it not?” went on the plain little man, “and you are a captain in the Sussex light infantry. Rise, Sir Charles,” he continued, gravely, “and you may present me to these ladies, your companions.” Sir Charles, glad enough to be released from his uncomfortable position, rose to his feet and stood at attention with a military salute. Then bowing profoundly, he said: “Your majesty,”—for the little man was no less a person than Kin/ George the Third —“this is the Countess of Carrington, and this is Mistress Deborah Slocum oftthee —er —Massachusetts Bay Colony.” “Os the state of Massachusetts, your i majesty,” said Deborah, with great spirit. “My affianced wife,' your majesty,” continued Seton, hastily, hoping to prevent an outbreak of wrath in his majesty’s mind at Deborah’s contumacy. “Not content with stealing my colonies,” said the king, kindly, but witl^ a note of melancholy in his voice, “you’s> Americans” —he choked a little at the word —“must now take the brave officers of my army. Rise, Mistress Slocum, and you, madam.” He extended his hand to Ellen, who was nearest to him. Poor Ellen, who had come upon a desperate errand, to beg a great gift from, the king, made no scruple about kissing the monarch’s fat and pudgy hand ere she rose to her feet in obedience to the king’s Indication. "Lady Carrington,” continued royal George meditatively, “let me see.” He | knew the peerage too, did this industrious little monarch, almost as well as the army list. “Your name is Ellen, is it not?” "Yes. your majesty.” “And you, too, are an American. I remember it all now. Lord Carrington was captured by your rebel friends. He was twice captured in Philadelphia, by you, my lady. I recall it all now,” cried the king with a sprightly air, greatly delighted at his mnemonic feat. “Yes, my dear —” he turned to the stout little lady who stood quietly by his side—“you remember my telling you all about Lord Carrington’s love for this lady. And now —’’ he stopped and looked about him vaguely. “And now, your majesty,” began poor Ellen, “his wife comes to you with a petition.” “A petition? For what?” asked the king, curiously. "Lord Carrington is arrested, sir.” “Arrested! And for what?” asked his majesty. “For —” Ellen faltered. “For disobedience of orders, sir,” interposed Seton. “How?” said the king. “ ’Tis a serious charge. And by whom preferred ?” “Captain Careysbrook of the Niobe, sir.” “And wherefore?” "Lord Carrington being ordered to report aboard ship, refused to go and

the ship sailed without him. sir.” “What reason had he for this disobe- • dience?” Little George had been a soldier himself, and he was very strict indeed on branches of military etiquette. Sir Charles hesitated. A pious man was the king, and desperately down upon dueling. Yet the truth had to be told. “Your majesty,” he began. And then he stopped. Sir, cried Ellen, taking upon herself the burden, “my husband fought a duel for me.” A duel?" asked the k : Jg, frowning. “Yes, your majesty’ v - “And with whom?’ “With the earl of Strathgate, sir.” “What was the result of the duel?” Lord Strathgate was severely wounded, sir.” “Not killed?” “No, your majesty.” “I’m glad of that,” returned King George. “The earl of Strathgate is ill prepared to meet his Maker. Proceed, madam.” "That is all, sir. Lord Carrington was arrested immediately after for not having gone aboard the ship. You see, sir, he knew the night before when he received the orders that he *

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I / / . ^5/ I / M A # /' AM V iit “I Hastened Here to Take the Blame Upon Myself, Sir.”

would have to fight, with Lord Strathgate in the morning, and he couldn’t go. The fault is mine, your majesty, and therefore I humbly ask his pardon.” “Explain yourself, madam.” returned the king, with a good deal of formality. “Y’our majesty,” began Ellen, falteringly, “I have been a very foolish woman. I ran away—with—Lord Strathgate.” v “What!” exclaimed the king, his face flushing with indignation. “And you have the effrontery to come here and confess it.” “Lady Carrington does herself an injustice,” again interposed Sir Charles Seton. “ 'Tis a long story, sir.” “Long or short,” answered the king, “I must have it. How was it, Sir Charles?” “It began at a house party at Carrington, your majesty." He hesitated and turned to Ellen. “I must make a I clean breast of it,” he said. “By all means,” cried the king, “conceal nothing, k—nothing back!” “Lord Carrington was ashamed of his wife, sir.” “And why?” asked the king, with a glance of admiration at Ellen, now clothed simply, but in the proper habj iliments of her sex, and who certainly | looked lovely enough and sweet | enough for any man on earth. “Because, sir,” said Ellen, answering the direct question, “I would not gamble; I could not dance; I was ig-

,6 TRY MY $75 FUNERALS,”

Baltimore Undertakers in War Using Billboard “Ads.” Baltimore, Md. —The funeral direct- | ors‘ trust and the independent undertakers are waging a grewsome war in Baltimore. As a result there is a liberal pictorial display of coffins all over the city, the illustrations of satinlined coffins being accompanied with such legends as “Try my $75 funerals. . will like them.” Vfflns in heroic size from great ! bilrooards make the populace shumier. , I Full and detailed lists of all articles । necessary to bury one with neatness ! and precision are seen daily in news- > j papers in display type, illuminated. I 1 with cuts. Competition and cut prices

norant of the accompllfihmantg of th« day.” “Hum!" growled the king. “Pro ceed, Sir Charles.” "There was a lady there who sought to encourage my Lord Carrington in his foolish and wrong estimate of his wife.” "Who was the woman?” Sir Charles hesitated. “I command you, sir, by your allegiance, that you tell me her name in' stantly.” It was Lady Cecily Carrington, your majesty,” answered Deborah, who had no scruples at all in the premises.

I he hussy!” ejaculated the queen, to whom Lady Cecily’s person and reputation were equally well known. The king raised a warning hand Sir Charles, at a nod from his majesty, resumed his tale. "Thinking herself betrayed, as well as despised and mocked, my lady fled by the aid of Lord Strathgate.” “But, your majesty,” interposed Deborah again, with astonishing boldness, she felt quite equal to any king that walked the earth, being a free born American citizen and she wished that Elder Brewster could see how she was bearing herself now, “I went with her.” “Good!” exclaimed the king, with evident satisfaction in hls^ '” . manner, “but pray, why cß^you go away with a person of Lord Strathgate’s reputation?” “Your majesty,” answered Ellen, “I knew naught of it. He had been kind to me. I told him that I wanted to get to Portsmouth and take a ship for the United States. He promised to take me there, but instead started to drive us to his own estate. Mistress Slocum and I escaped from him, took a boat by the sea shore and made the best of our way to Portsmouth harbor.” “We paid for the boat we took, your

majesty,” interposed Deborah ag*ln. : “Well, what next?” asked the king, smiling a little at the American girl. “Lord Strathgate pursued u.g to I Portsmouth by shore and Lord Carrington followed him. They met. My i husband knew that I had gone with Lord Strathgate. Words passed between them. There was a challenge and a week ago they fought at Blythedale hall. Mistress Slocum and I were i there, and —’/ “Did they fight in your presence?” interrupted the king. “We were concealed in some bushes | whither we had retreated for rest until we could arrange to continue our I journey, sir.” “And you saw the duel?” “Yes, your majesty," answered El- j len. “He fought like a hero, sir, and ; for me.” “Then what happened?" “Then he was arrested and taken back to the Britannia —” “And what next?” “I hastened here to take the blame upon myself, sir,” said Ellen, sinking again to her knees, “and to beg that you will pardon my lord and restore him to duty.” “Hath he had lesson enough, think you?” “I'll answer for it that he has, your majesty,” said Sir Charles. “And have you had lesson enough?” demanded little George, looking down ! j quizzically into the upturned face of ’ the woman kneeling before him. ■ 1 (TO BE CONTINUED.)

have entered the sanctuary of the dead and the cemetery with a blaze of trumpets. It was begun by two young and bold spirits who announced that they could furnish the best funerals at $75 and that there was but one price. The claims that they possessed all mod ern conveniences in the way of com modious parlors, private chapels, and convenient locations and that the' give the “best service, superior qual ity and style and excellence,” are an ■ nounced just as they advertise stovepolish or shoestrings in the depart ; meat stores. One may get a blacl i ; hearse or a gray hearse, any one cd ■ i six different styles of coffins, six doo.' I j crepes of any shade, and “no aiirv > i charges ''

aittv 1 SHOWS VITAL I ■ ■ CARE f PRESIDENT’S MESSAGE iEN. t OF DEPENDENT CP I —' ■ — ;d in the Interests of the Nation h —ReeWeifare of the Little ded J ommendation 'or th< ( Legislation. J rhich, it Washington.— Legislate aw > win 1 is believed, if enacted i the fu ' t । make an important. epo< ent chM' . ture well-being of the de 'nded in 1 dren of the nation, is rec Roose- 1 a special message by Pre makes a velt to congress, in whicl children • strong plea in the interet coming within this class. w as as 1 Substantially, the mess follows: 5 assem"On January 25-26. 1909, lon^rhil 1 bled in this city, on my came d^rr^To 6 C T ° f de union men dien. Io this ronferen^ n the care ’ from nearly every smte irV n Ule a and women actively engager of dependent children, and \ of hieh sented all the leading religi ® AL "The subject considered is A? L Importance to the well-bj H^hn tion. The census bureau' ’ that there were in orph; L mL dren’s homes about 93,000 dren. There are prob; 'either on ^(the precis -number ne idetT bv ■ ascertained), in private h T board or in adopted hornet „i.n. the generosity of foster par a e n n - dition to these there wei dren in institutions for ji t eith . quents. , “Each of these children re citizenship era potential addition to ti t ‘ "X? capacity and the enlighten. of the nation, or. if allov ‘ * 0 from neglect, a potential at r enemies destructive forces of the cor altogether ranks of criminals and oi bereft of of society are recruited in : t f _ undue proportion from child | their natural homes and left ficient care. ( on are in ? i •‘The interests of the nt great^atevolved in the welfare of t gFeat children no less than in our •rial affairs. rence was “The keynote of the coi d t expressed in these words: Z ! “ ‘Home life is the highe ^for X product of civilization. Ch ~ B not be deprived of it exc Nation en- ' ent and compelling reason? ' accurUrging the passage of 1. F abhng the authorities to s th nre oi. ate information concerning 1 lating to dependent childre _ dent says: to us , ” "It is not only discreditabi information people that there is now n ‘ oWM so and authoritative source of .nferrmtion upon these subjects relating ederal govbut in the absence of such .-mo un as should be supplied by the t ’ ernment many abuses hav ’ nn i v vl cheeked; for public sentime , facts great corrective power, ca , ' the aroused by full knowledge ti ' a In addition to such Inform ; . , ‘, ld . census bureau and other e ^b®^^ cies of the federal goverrn . A I provide, there remains much , should be tained through lines of resc ’ f authorized by law; and th( correlation and dissemina ‘ ith P w i,\. knowledge obtained without - \ tion of effort or interferem A„, A Is already being done. TI amendable thin^B more vital to the w - f , j. nation than accurate and .w. sh ’ knowledge of the best metl I, h an dt ing with children, especial!; capped by miXt^ a°ndV of such knowledge each X h ??b left to work out its own pri nmunities being able to learn of and Th( success or failure of oth< A ’ along the same lines [of * are bills for the establishes ■MUMtaMI ^<9. ‘ are

- , al) dislntW , of children, and ai. elusions educational, and reli most imparts of the country. dial homeThe president cites if normal, reached by the conferei umilies. when portant are recommends should be on less and neglected chile $ possible; the should be cared for in f t all agencies practical; that institutions ; children; rethe cottage plan as far a: > lation against state to inspect work oiildren between which care for dependentlent of a federpeal of prohibitive legis -islation covertransfer of dependent ch ns is urgently states, and the establishm tident. al children's bureau. Leg “I further urge I ing these recommendatio' nacted as may I recommended by the pre; bring the laws The message continues: j the care of dethat such legislation be e “deral territory | be necessary in order to her conclusions and practices in regard to ce. pendent children in all f the board of Into harmony with the ot the incorporareached by the conferen jencies, as well “That the approval of charter of any j charities be required for which includes tion of all child-caring a! hat other than ias amendments of the )s be forbidden benevolent corporation needy children. ! child-caring work, and tparities. through duly incorporated agenciits, shall inspect to engage in the care oLshall inspect the “That the board of clich care for deits duly authorized agetpr by institutionthe work of all agents, L methods, and work of all agencies wlfublic or private pendent children, wheth klways jealously ial or by home-finding I children whose whether supported by pl to leave them ; funds. The state has ®ie appointment guarded the interests oflnd, accountable | parents have been able fen though there : property by requiring t| parent. Surely I of a guardian, under bojwho is not only ' directly to the courts, els ought to be no ; be a competent survivirof the more fortu- ! the Interests of the chiVrits property. If | an orphan but pennilestov3rnment is necI less sacred than those d it is even more | nate orphan who inhe If we are to rej the protection of the g >rated institutions ■ essary in the one cas igage in this reI necessary in the other, necessary to proi quire that only incorpfcn, lest the state I shall be allowed to elonscious partner sbonsibile work, it is Jom ignorance or vide for public inspected to deal with should become the ur of those who either itjhn as is herein ■ inefficiency are unsuiymporu ’t for the the problem. ~ ’Stately con“I deem such legisl “aSr an exi recommended not onl- ^^-child prowelfare of the chi' ^vnment to the earned, but Imp/ '»• which should ample of a high . dfdn for teadertection by the natis>. several states of the — — be able to look to th S. ship in such matte hat all books Boole libraries and There is no d< abode of the | kept for a long t other places becoi ners> germ and microbe } an'honored The Tartar ''' l » take When a Tartar 1 ,M<l hlm ' I guest to dine wit ■ the guest by the , the table ' ing in the Post- tinners. _ I . Lucullus was i ” said ; . ■ l wit at one of his ; “I’ll make you ■ ■ •LT han,-”’ W lth a lifted Hear —hear: . , . j makes us a para j The host quiet ver ’ 1 had a ] hard, and said: 1 am a S° od “When I was . ] j v - . , 'f in silence good liver; but ’ i liver, I have ap< beatl «S one ( They all thou - he ^ oraan j ! a moment, and t s ^ a Cfl ’ j < another on t fashion. —St. L 1

Stephen the First J Christian Martyr | Sunday School Leeson for Feb. 21, 1909 U Specially Arranged for This Paper 8 LESSON TEXT.—Acts 6:8-15; 7:54-8:3. Memory verses 55, 56. GOLDEN TEXT.—They stoned Stephen, calling upon God, and saying: “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.”—Acts 7:59. TlME.—About A. D. 35, 36. Ramsay and Harnack place It earlier, 32 and 33. According to Prof. Riddle there was an interregnum of the Roman governors about A. D. 36 when Pilate was deposed, which made it easier for the Jewish rulers to put Stephen to death contrary to Roman law. PLACE. —Jerusalem. The city, the synagogue of the Libertines, the council chamber, and outside of St. Stephen's gate opposite Gethsemane. Comment and Suggestive Thought. “We now enter upon a new epoch of continuous development which will lead us without pause to Acts 11:26, 1. e„ from Hebrew disciples at Jerusalem to Greek Christians at Antioch.” — । Rackam. There were two classes of Jews at Jerusalem. “The Grecians” (v. 1), R. V., “Grecian Jews,” Hellenists, those Jews who had settled in Greek ■ speaking countries, who spoke the ; common Greek dialect in place of the ’ vernacular Aramaic current in Pales- ■ tine, and who would be more or less influenced by Greek thought and cusi toms, and broadened to accept of i the necessary new development of Christianity. “Against the brews” (v. 1), the Jews of Palestine, composed by far the larger part vj the church of Jerusalem. A Between these two classes t ere arose a complaint and murmuring because the widows of the foreign Jews ; did not receive their natural share of ; the support given to the home Jews. And yet they needed it even more than . the widows who were among acquaiuJ tances and friends. The Difficulty Settled by the OrI ganization of Laymen for the Work. — The church elected seven men to ati tend to this and similar duties, leaving the apostles free to give their ' whole time to preaching, prayer, and training the disciples. The qualities required in these offi--11 cers of the church were (1) of good re- । ■ port, (2) full of the Holy Spirit, (3) ■ of wise judgment, (4) full of faith. 1 । Character Sketch of Stephen.—l, : “A young man of such original genius = j and special grace that there was noth- ■ ■ ing he might not have attained to had ; he been allowed to live. His wonderi ful openness of mind; his perfect free- >’ ■ dom from all the prepossessions, pre- ' judices, and superstitions of his day; ’ his courage, his eloquence, his spote i less character; with a certain sweet. - I and at the same time majestic man- ’ ; ner, all combined to set Stephen in e the very front rank both of service e and of risk. He was already all but ■ ; the foremost man of his day.”—Alex- ® > ander Whyte. Bible Characters. e 2. He was a man of power, the s | power of faith and character aflame I with the Holy Spirit. His eloquence was “logic on fire.” e 3. He was full of grace, and ol 1- graces, and the beauty of holiness e ge^^. u-. e e not strong. Saxrfe things are strong j and not beautfftiL-"How seldom 1 3 a Boanerges (son of thunder) At s same time a Barnabas (a son of com ■ j solation).. But the highest characters [ combine both. ‘They that wait upon , the Lord shall renew their strength i . . . and the beauty of the Lord ■ God shall be upon them.’ ” —Pres. . | Mark Hopkins, Strength and Beauty. : • 4. The source of his power was that J he was filled with the Holy Spirit (v. ’ 5). Prof. Bruce said of Phillips • Brooks: “The man is just, a great | water-main attached to the everlasting i reservoir of God’s truth and grace and , love, and streams of life, as by a heavenly gravitation, pour through him to refresh weary souls."—Prof. A. V. G. Allen’s Life of Phillips Brooks. 5. The fruits of his power were deeds of healing and love, wonderful ’ miracles, “signs,” which were God’s | indorsement of his teachings. It is ! almost impossible to prove that one’s teachings are from God, except by deeds that only God can do—miracles of transformed character, or miracles of healing and help. j Stephen’s Argument of Defense Before the Sanhedrim.—Acts 7:1-53. 1. Stephen’s address is not a direct but a. real answer to the charges I against him. 2. His very use of the Scriptures is a proof that he received them and did not blaspheme by repudiating them. 3. He defends what the Christians thought of the temple by the history in the Bible they accepted. 4. He shows that the Jesus he preached was the one foretold by j Moses. 5. He shows that they who pretended to uphold the law were themselves breaking it as did their fathers, whom the prophets condemned. Stephen suffered like a saint, ; praying, forgiving his enemies, while ; ।he fell asleep. The very expression j is an argument for immortality; for i the one who sleeps is alive and • । awakes the same person that lay down , ।to sleep. "Say not ‘Good night,’ but > in a brighter clime bid me ‘Good morn- ; ing. Our very word “cemetery” means “sleeping place.” Saul standing by and deeply impressed by the scene, and not long afterward changed into a disciple of i Jesus, shows bow the blood of martyrs became the seed of the church, and reminds us of the monument to Charles and John \\ esley in Westminster Abbey. A seemingly ordinary man was con- i verted, opened his heart to receive the Holy Spirit, and became one of the most influential of men. So it i may be true of us, common men and women. Out of troublous times, difficulties, and persecutions, as from Jacob's nil- ■ low of stones, there may arise a path- ’ way to God and heaven, the ’clear shining hills of Beulah above- the j mists of distraction and the thunderbolts of suffering.” Stephen’s Christian life was shorL i but he accomplished more than most I men had they lived as long as Methu- , selah. Stephen has part in the triumphs of । Chr’stianity through the ages.

pvisns I.- - I Valentine Song. J ' ■ ■ - /1 w \ \ i I v r I >' ■ / * Wn xxVJ 'll!! 4 '' lllii 111 i d* SAID HE: I “If you will be my Valentine And brew my evening tea for me, \ I’ll toast you in the sparkling wine ! And shield you till eternity! : Tlie rude and biting winds of life I Shall never touch you as my wife: “If you will be my Valentine, My love for you shall never die. As constant as the stars divine My heart shall be as yelars go by! No jarring note shall ever be When you are frying steak for me!” SAID SHE: “If I should be your Valentine And brew your evening t,ea for you. Will you toe always to the line And praise my biscuits and my stew! Will you forswear affinities And other femininities? • ; “If I should be your Valentine. You need not die for me at all But will you. e’er we rise to dine. . Get up and build ’em when I call? j If you will sign this vow ‘on sight,’ I’ll be your Valentine to-night!” 1 CHORUS: (she) . “Oh, he will be my Valentine, (I) (his) And she will be my lady fair J And we shall live on love and wine - | Without a thought of woe or care! (he) For she has promised to be mine, * My Valentine! My Valentine!” 1 O O O Power of the Press. c Newspapers have made president l ' and bustles, happiness and suicidf I marriage and alimony. They hav e . bolstered empires and rag carpet: e They have fed curiosity and goat: e They have (w)rapped the good an the bad, the workman’s lunch and th drunkard’s beer. They have used me s ' for footballs and by men have bee I have ISBtfU.’Hn'Bpse. The ’ They'“ av e cleaned chimne iiTifiSWßa ' ■ YA t ' ; fires and stuffed sofa pillows. Thej : i have “cut ice” and been cut intc ; ) pantry-shelf covers. They have causec [ | pain and calked panes. They have i : built empires and skinned umpires t j They have made friends and ridiculed . J enemies. They have sunk fortunes . , and made men famous, married widows ■ and curtained windows. They have been born of a shirt-tail full of type and a hay-press, lived and flourished on hot-air and thank-yous. Sometimes I wonder at their constitution. They have starved and thrived, fasted and smiled, parched and bloomed, dried up and borne fruit —but this paper hasn’t the recipe and if some of the back subscribers don’t pay pretty soon, the j editor is going to rise up on his hind । legs and roar! We need kind words * and money, a pair of overalls and a , new typewriter ribbon. If you are out j of kind words, typewriter ribbons and . overalls, come on with the money! It i will be a shock, but we are going to stand it if we bust a tug!—Uncle By. O Q O Idlewild Thoughts. OI A wag wants to know what would • happen if we got up som° morning and found the sun was an hour late? I know. I would go back to bed ■ again! A Minnesota newspaper advertised for a girl last week and his wife brought the editor of that newspaper i twins. Os course it pays to advertise. The man who will drink bad coffee for breakfast and go down town glad Is too good for this world. The “Pied Piper.” A New York normal school examination had among its questions: "W hat is the educational value of The Pied Piper of Hamelin?’ ” A would-be teacher answered: “ A Pied Piper’ teaches children to be kind to animals, especially rats.” New York's Vast Wealth. If each individual in New York citv owned an equal portion of its real estate he would be worth in land $1,520, according to the assessed valuation.

The Exceptional Equipment of the California Fig Syrup Co. and the I scientific attainments of its chemists have I rendered possible the production of Syrup I of Figs and Elixir of Senna, in all of its ■ excellence, by obtaining the pure medicI inal principles of plants known to act most i beneficially and combining them most skillfully, in the right proportions, with ; its wholesome and refreshing Syrup of California Figs. As there is only one genuine Syrup of I Figs and Elixir of Senna and as the genj uine is manufactured by an original ■ method known to the California Fig Syrup i Co. only, it is always necessary to buy the । genuine to get its beneficial effects. ; A knowledge of the above facts enables i one to decline imitations or to return them if, upon viewing the package, the full name ; of the California Fig Syrup Co. is not found printed on. the front thereof. NOT FOR HIM. “Now, boy, this is important! It’s an invitation to dinner!” “Thanks, boss. But I can’t accept. Me dress suit’s in hock!” State op Ohio City or Toledo, f Lucas County. f ss - Frank J. Cheney makes oath that he 13 mla ! partner of the firm of F. J. Cheney * Co., doing business In the City of Toledo. County and State aforesaid, and that said firm will pay the sum ot ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every ease of Catarrh that cannot be cured Dy the use ot Hall's Catarrh Cure. FRANK J. CHENEY. Sworn to before me and subscribed in my presence, this 6th day of December, A. D., 1886. i —*— ( A. W. GLEASON. i ) SEAL c Notary Public. Hall s Catarrh Cure Is taken Internally and acta : directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces of the v system. Send for testimonials, tree. F. J. CHENEY 4 CO.. Toledo. OSold by al! DraKglsts. 75c. Take Hall’s Family Pills for constipation He Wins Either Way, The Doctor —Your wife is threatI ened with pneumonia, and she’ll die if i she attends that party. The Hubby—Then I shall not advise her either way. She’ll die if she has to miss it. Great Home Eye Remedy, for all diseases of the eve, quick relief from using PETTIT’S EYE SALVE. All druggists or Howard Bros., Buffalo, N. Y. Some people spend so much time handing out advice that they have no lime to accomplish anything. ts For Hoarseness and Coughs “Brown's Ip Bronchial Troches” are wonderfully eflv ’ fective. 25 cents a box. Samples sent free ve by John I. Brown & Son, Boston, Mass, ts. i ts. i Women wouldn’t be so talkative nd if they only spoke their minds. he , —!! :: AFTFP | FOU^YtARS j OF MISERY y Cured by Lydia E. Pinko ham’s Vegetable Compound Baltimore, Md. —“For four years e my life was a misery to me. I suffered

' J AXAv. -L OlUltiCU ■ from irregularities, terrible dragging sensations, extreme nervousness, and that all gone feeling in my stomach. I had given up hope of ever being well when I began to take Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound. Then I felt as though l new life had been

e I I Wl

, given me, and lam recommending it a to all my friends.”—Mrs. W. S. Ford, s 1938 Lansdowne St., Baltimore, Md. a The most successful remedy in thia t country for the cure of all forms of i female complaints is Lydia E. Pinkt ham’s Vegetable Compound. It has stood the test of years and to-day is ’ more widely and successfully used than any other female remedy. It has cured thousands of women who have been troubled with displacements, inflammation, ulceration, fibroid tumors, irregularities, periodic pains, backache, ; that bearing-down feeling, flatulency, indigestion, and nervous prostration, after all other means had failed. If you are suffering from any of these ailments, don't give up hope until you have given Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound a trial. If you would like special advice write to Mrs. Pinkham, Lynn, Mass., for it. She has guided thousands to health, free of ; charge. 1 H । Ki W ' । fat ♦jii. A"! S Buy a Watch Only of a Retail Jeweler Y j For he ran. properly adjust it to | I your individual requirements so it wiU I I keep perfect time under ail conditions. 1 I Never buy a watch by mail, for no I I matter how good you think it is—it I I wul never be accurate unless it is ad- I I justed for the one who carries it. A I South Bend Watch F rozen in solid ice keeps perfect time A South Bend Watch, with all the skill and experience that gees into its construction, would fai! utterly as a perfect time-keeper if it wasn’t adjusted to meet the requirements of each individual. Xou can never buy a South Bend I Watch by mail. They are sold only I by retail jewelers.who are competent I to properly adjust them. I Ask jour jeweler to show you a South I Bend W ateh —a real masterpiece of I mechanism. Write us and receive by n--fol time in any temperature.