The Syracuse Journal, Volume 18, Number 7, Syracuse, Kosciusko County, 18 June 1925 — Page 3

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* CHAPTER IX—Continued —ll—- — Church, tired of standing by herself and very curious to know what was going on. edged slowly toward the table at which Tommy was sitting. The king, who has verysharp eyes, noticed her. "By the way.-, he said, “why did you bring your aunt with, you? Casimir tells me that she's your aunt 1 suppose she Is your aunt? 1 used to say cousin myself sometimes, and iH-easlonally sister —not that any one ever believed me — but 1 never thought of aunt I suppose now that she isn’t—but she can’t be. can’t possibly be. But still some men have queer fancies. I suppose she isn’t Miss Temple, is she?" "No. she’s not" said Tommy. "That’s almost a pity." said the king. “I don’t think Calypso would have objected to her. I don’t think even the patriarch would have minded. However, If she isn’t —" He had to drop his voice at the last words, for Janet hnd come quite close to them. The king greeted her in the most friendly manner. “I’m just giving your nephew a little advice.” he said. “1 was talking about the financial position of Lystria. Low rate of exchange and all that, you know. But the worst of It is that the people simply won’t pay their taxes. At least they wouldn't in my time. Ever since I’ve been here I’ve been thinking things over and I see now that I went the wrung way about collecting taxes. AU governments make the same mistake. They send ’round disagreeable men with large blue papers and threaten people . who don’t , pay up. That’s the wrong way to < get money. As head waiter In the | Mascotte I make more in a single month than 1 ever got out of Lystria in a year. I don’t threaten any one. 1 don’t ask any one for a tip. A ' good waiter can make a man feel like , a worm if he orders anything cheaper than chaiqpagne, and without ■ speaking a word can see to it that be get* a ten per cent tip at least on every bill that's paid. 1 take fifty ; per cent of what the waiters get. That’s revenue, collected without the slightest What I’m ad- | vising your nephew to do is to try I the same plan in Lystria. Fire all the exlsltlng tax collectors. They’re an utterly worthless lot, and their methods are antiquated. Hire a staff of waiters "from some place like this. Employ them on a fifty-fifty basis, and just see what you get In. Now what do you think of that plan. Miss Temple?” * | “My name isn't Temple.” said ■ Janet. ’lt’s—" “Os course not," said the king. . “Norheys told me it wasn’t" | “It’s Church. Miss Janet Church." , She »ix>ke stiffly. Her impression j was that the king was a very drunk j he»d waiter. H “Church.” said the r ktng. “How ecclesiastical I And Norheys he’s a curate. You ought to be able to handle the patriarch between you.” “I’m going to Lystria." said Janet, "to enlist the patriarch's sympathies In the cause of World Peace Through the Union of Christian Churches.” The king looked at her for a moment with a little pazzled frown on his forehead. Then he turned to Tommy. “I must say you’re nwmaging this uncommonly well." be said. "If you can start the patriarch arguing about religion, he’ll forget— It’s an extraordinarily ingenious plan. I wish rd thought of it In my time. But then 1 never had an aunt who could have done it 1 wish I could be there. Mlm Church, rd like to hear you and the patriarch at it together. But 1 cant ga They’d never let me eras'* the frontier. Besides. 1 must hold on to my job here. It’s all 1 have to live on.” Janet turned away. Drunken head waiters who babbled neither amused nor interested her. She left the room with great dignity. Half an hour later, after receiving a great deal more good advice. Tommy managed 'to get off and go back to his hotel. CHAPTER X I have bad several talks with Tom my about what happened in Berlin. It was easy, or fairly easy to get at the facts. It was very much more difficult to find out what Tommy thought about It all. "But didn’t the whole thing strike you as odd?” I asked him. "Os course it did.” raid Tommy. •Odd is hardly the word for it. It was simply mad." "Still, you went on with it. I mean to say, you didn’t try to dear things up." “I did nothing else,,-except tty to dear things up,” said Tommy. - I kept on trying. I told every one I met tbere’d been a mistake, that I wasn't the .man they took me Use; but they wouldn’t believe me." “So at last you made up your mind to take tpe goods the gods provided, a princess and a throne?" “Well, of course, there was Calypso," said Tommy. “I didn’t really think at first that I had mueb of getting her, ma try .Ing. her, I mean. Well, I told you how I was feeling about her.” “Yes. I understand that. But ass

Is this: what did you think was: happening? How did you explain It all to yourself? Did you try to think it out ?" * 5. “1 thought it out all that night." said Tommy, "at least aa long -as I stayed awake. I dare say I was awake for as much as an hour or an hour and a half after 1 got into bed and I was thinking hard all the time, partly about Calypso, of course. But—" “Mostly about Calypso. I expect." “Well, you may say mostly." said Tommy. “Still. 1 did think about the others, Casimir and the king, and about the absurd way they were going on. insisting that I was some one 1 wasn’t and all that.” .. . “And what conclusion did you come to? How did you explain it to yourseif?" "It sounds rather absurd." said Tommy, “and 1 dare say you’ll think me a fool. But you know the way that fellow Casimir keeps on quoting Shakespeare?” “I have heard him do it and marveled.’’ ? “Evidently he’d read a lot of Shakespeare," said Tommy, “and admired him and all that" "These mid-European peoples,” I said, “all admire Shakespeare imiii *1 HL Janet Church, Tired of. Standing by Herself and Very Curious to Know What V. as Going On, Edged Slowly Toward the Tabl* ct Which Tommy Was Sittrng. mensely. They know him a great deal better than we do.” “Thgt’s what I’m getting at,” said Tommy. “Casimir admires Shake speare tremendously, and 1 dare say the king does too. 1 don’t profess myself to know all the plays off by heart. Still I’ve read them. At least. I’ve read most of them. Do you remember the beginning of one of the plays—l didn’t* remember which it was st the time, but I’ve looked it up since, and It’s “The Taming of the Shrew." At the beginning of it there’s n kind of little play which hasn’t anything to do with the shrew, or the taming or anything else.” No more than Tommy am I a Shakespearean scholar. But I recollect that then* was a kind of prologue to "The Taming of the Shrew." "It’s about a sort of spoof." said Tommy, "which a lot of people played off on a ragged beggar called Christopher Sly, pretending to believe that the poor man was a king or a great lord or something until they very nearly persuaded him that he was!" I remembered the acene when Tommy described It. A certain lord, returning from hunting with his attendants, all of them in merry mood, found a beggar in a bed In an inn. And out of sheer gaiety of heart set to work to persuade him that be was a wealthy nobleman. "My Ide* was.” said Tommy, “that they were trying thut trick on with me. 1 don’t know bow the game ended in Shakespeare. In fact 1 don’t think It did end. . But 1 thought 1 might just as well go through with it and see what happened. There was Calypoo, you see.” “Yes.” I said. "You’ve told me how you frit about her. Did you believe she was a princeraF “Os course. 1 didn’t." said Tommy. “At least not at first 1 thought she was just a dancing girt And I thought her father was a head waiter, and that Casimir waa a silly aw who’d got Shakesi»eare on the brain. I’d have chucked the whole thing {.

»X»XWX»X»X*6*X»X»X»X<*X»X»X»X*»X»X»X»X<X*>X»X»X»X»X»X»X*» “For the Merry Heart Is a Gladsome Thing”

Fortunately for the world Its supply ft may be said. “They have a mercurial of Bottled Sunsiiine far exceeds that of temperament.*’ Its Wet Blanketa If thia were not »o Better to be merry, to be known at what so unbearable place the world Bottled Sunshine, with a heart as full would be! Some lands, peoples and n f aD( j of living as art centuries are richer In It than others. the woods of singing birds in ths Children and puppies and kittens and springtime—Montreal Family Herald. lambs and all young things (unless they be Ul) are Bottled Sunshine. Pre- _ . . n cions stwws and coat flower butte and Only Endaring Pnacn seeds and the kernels of fruit are Bot- No peace was ever won from fate by tied Sunshine. Flashes of kindly wit subterfuge or agreement t no peace is and peals of laughter from out a many ever in store for any of us, but which heart are Its very essence. we shall win by victory over sham* or Beautiful, bewitching, attractive tn an sin—victory over the sin that opunstable, uncertain sort of way. are the presses, as well as over that which dteporttttm of some people, of whom corrupts.-Ruskin.

THE SYRACVHB JOURNAL

and kicked Casimir next time 1 san him, only that 1 really did want to—’ “You wanted to marry Calypso?" “Most frightfully,” said Tommy, who is a very simple souL “Considering yuur position.” I said, “and your profession, and—and my sister Emily, don’t you think you ought to have hesitated about marrying a girt like tbatF “1 suppose 1 ought.” said Tommy. “But 1 didn’t. A fellow doesn’t yo»know, when he’s— I told you that Calypso laid me out, absolutely a gone man, the very moment 1 saw her." That is all very well; but 1 still think Tommy ought to have thought what he was doing. If he married her. supposing her to be. as he thought simply a German dancing girl, he would have had to take her home witb him and she would have been the curate's wife in my sister ) Emily’s parish. What sort of example was Calypso likely to set to members of tbe Giris’ Friendly society? What would the members of the Mothers’ union have thought about her? What would dear old Canon Pyke, simplest, gentlest, most innocent of men. have thought oi a curate’s wife who kicked her legs into the air on the platform o* his parochial hall at the annual entertainment t of the Temperance society? And Emily herself? My imagination utterly failed when I tried to imagine Emily's reception of Calypso. She had not a very high opinion of Tommy before he went to Berlin. In her original letter to me about his disappearance she had said that be was not altogether suited to be * clergyman. She would have been confirmed in that opinion when he came back witb Calypso for a wife. There was no real harm in the girl. She was as thoroughly respectable as Viola Temple was. But Edmund Troyte. who was a man of the world, shied at tbe idea of his nephew marrying her. Emily, who is a lady not of this world but of the next, would have been outraged and scandalized. If Canon Pyke’s curate, a man who preached to her on Sundays, brought home Calypso as a wife. How would Calypso have taught a class in Sunday school? Emily would regard It as part of the duty of a curate’s wife to teach e class in Sunday school. There are things which Tommy certainly ought • to have thought about; but did not. As he said, “a fellow doesn't” when he has fallen suddenly and violently in love. And. of course, there" were other consid eratlons. Calypso really was a princess. Tommy did not know that, at the time. Perhaps no one in the parish would have known it at first: but in the end it would have leaked out What would have happened? My sister is no • more a snob than tlie rest of us; but, like all decent people, site has a respect for royalty. She might severely condemn the manners, cus toms and morals of a Berlin caharet dancer; but she is not the woman to do more than whisper nasty things about a princess. Her position would be really awkward. A curate’s wife occupies a definite, quite humble place in a parish. But a princess in any well regulated church is receive*! at the door by the clergy in full canonicals, has a gilt and crimson chait to sit on. instead of being herded into a pew like other people, and i* often prayed for by name in the course of the service. What could be done about a princess who is also the curate’s wife? But these complicated problems did not trouble Tommy. He was able to go to sleep after little more than an hour’s wakefulness, rest quietly and awake next morning prepared tc play out to the end what he supposed to be Casimir’s game. When he came down next morning he went to the head clerk In the reception office and asked whet het Count Casimir had called or sent any message. Casimir had done neither. But the head clerk, who felt It his duty to watch over his guests, told Tommy that he ought to go to tbe police office at once to show his passport and obtain permission to remain in Berlin. This, he said, was necessary in the case of all foreigners who wished to stay more than two days. The whole business, so he assured Tommy, was purely formal, tiresome, but nothing worse. Tommy bad nothing to do except display his passport. He would immediately receive tbe necessary written permit. It was called—Tommy wrote down the word to make sure of remembering it—•H Ausweis. (TO BC CONTINVBD.I Conscience Ruled Him One of the witnesses at a roya. commission appointed to Inquire into a case of alleged bribery in an election stated that he had received g 25 to v<»t« Conservative, and in cross-examina-lion it was elicited that he bad algo j received §25 to vote Liberal. Mr. Justice Matthew, in atna-emenc. ’ repealed: • You say you received $25 «, vote Conwr'stiveF -Yes, my lord." “And you also received $25 io vote ÜberalF “Yes. my lord.” -And for whom did you vote at tbe asked the astonished judge, throwing himsrif back in tbe chair. And the witness, with Injured dignity iu every Line of bls face, answered with great earnestness: "I voted, my ford, according to my conscience!”— Vancouver Province.

Wih Humor TIME ENOUGH The impatient diner sent for th* Manager of the restaurant. "See here!” he exclaimed. “I ordered cold roast beef 30 minutes ago and I haven’t cot it yet.” "How long ago?” "Thirty minutes.” "Good gracious. Til have to see •bout that. It should be cold by this time.” FROM CLOSE SHA VES | ■ She tiearmug to drive) —W-w-w- t what Is that peculiar knock I hear? He—That’s just my heart beating, dear. Give and Take * Some of us lose, some of us make. But be we losers,- be we Life is a frame of give and take. With odds in favor of the takers. He Wasn’t Jealous "I am glad you are free from that conceit which prompts professional jealousy.” said the man who assumes a paternal manner. “Well,” said the young actor, languidly, “to tell you the truth, I haven’t seep any actor whose work suggested any reason whatever for my bring jealous.” x Nearly Bankrvpt Two Ways “So you lent Harbinger the money, did youF “Yes.” “What did he sayF “He promised to pay with alacrity." “He did, eh? Well, let me tell you this: If there’s one thing that’s I scarcer with him than money, it’s alacrity.” HE WAS RATTLED I® |?| (j I //J Friend (who has dropped in)— What’s the mutter, Jim? You seem to be rattled. Jim —Do I? Well, we’ve just had a big shake-up In this office, you sea. Last of Grandpa Grandpa fn a motor car Pushed the lever back too far. Twlnklo. twinkle, little star, (Music by the O. A. R.) Little Fun for Himself “Well, Vaughn, how’s your sweetheart r “We're not friends any more." "Well, you're going to make up. aren’t you?" •Sure, but I’m going to play insulted for about a week, and spend some of my money on myself."—Montreal Gasette. > - - Explained A famous barrister was cross- ; examining a woman witness. Tbe l woman had used the word “humlug.“ ! She refused to define the word, but asked if she could give an example. . Permission was given. "Well, sir." she explained. “If I was j to call yer a good-looking man. I I thould be ’umbugging yer.”—Tit-Bitx ' Amenities I . Peeved Young Wife—l don’t care! . I only married you because your hair waved the same as Jack Hartow’s. Jolted Husband—ls that so? Well, I only married you because you used the same flavor lipstick as Madge Morton. No More for Him "Any inqulriqsF asked the washing machine agent. -Lady on UmMeenth street want* a demonstration.” “Let her tell It to somebody else. I did her washing last week." In Style Mrs. Wagg—Tills magazine says • formal dinner is incomplete without nuts. Wagg—Well, my dear, you always invite some to yours. He Deserved the Name Ethel—Who is that man you just bowed to? Penelope—That was Dobson, tbe gNMt composer. Ethel—A composer, did you say? Penelope—Yes. He manufacture* At It Enough Tiwr. « wmu s>!«■s.

Jape Learn Englieh as Matter of Course English is taught in the public schools all over Japan. Later, when I came to travel widely in the interior. I often found bright schoolboys fourteen or fifteen years old who would volunteer as interpreters. Theodore Geoffrey writes in the Saturday Evening Post. In another generation English may be a second language for the Japanese. *ven as the Dutch today are competent linguists, because the world cannot be bothered to learn Dutch. English, unless a Japanese has been educated abroad, becomes rather peculiar in Japanese mouths, for according to Japanese custom, every consonant must be followed by a vowel, and there is no ”1“ or “v" or “th.” Thus “beer" becomes “bieru”; “glass," “gurssu,” and “hotel," “hoteni." Luck Ray Long, editor of the Hearst's International-Cosmopolitan Magazine. . tells why he doesn’t believe in luck. He thinks every man gets about what he deserves. In proof be tells a story liu which Sam Harris, theatrical producer. points the moral: "Luck may be 5 per cent of life, ' but the other 95 per cent —which Is j what’s in the man—always decides the outcome. I’ve met thousands of people everywhere, in every walk of , life, and 1 never knew one who got much more or less than he deserved, t When a chap knows medicine and Europe and five languages, and still is a waiter, somethitfs wrong!” Fhousands Have Kidney Trouble and Never Suspect It Applicants for Insurance Often Rejected Judging from report* from druggist* who are constantly in direct touch with the public, there, is one preparation that has been very* successful in overcoming these 1 conditions. The mild and healing influence of Dr. Kilmer’s Swamp-Root is soon realized. It stands the highest for its remarkable record of success. An examining physician for one of ths prominent Life Insurance Companies, in an interview of .the subject, made the astonishing statement that one reason why so many applicants for insurance are rejected is because kidney trouble is so common to the American people, and the large majority of those whose applications are declined do not even suspect that they have the disease. Dr. Kilmer’s Swamp-Root is on sale at all drug stores in bottles of two sizes, medium and large. However, if you wish first to test this great preparation send ten cents to Dr. Kilmer d Co., Binghamton, N. Y-, for * sample bottle. When writing be sure tnd mention this paper. Bernard Shaw’s Humor As the world knows, George Bernard Shaw is a staunch vegetarian, and all the many diwiples of this particular dietetic cult look up to him as a shining example. Imagine, therefore, thfito amazement and disgust when G. B. SJraid in public: “If I feel that I can enjoy a nice juidy beefsteak I have it.” One of his followers took him to task about this. “Calm yourself, my dear fellow!" drawled Shaw. “1 never do feel that 1 can enjoy a nice juicy beefsteak.” Freshen a Heavy Skin With the antiseptic, fascinating Cutlcura Talcum Powder, an exquisitely scented, economical face, skin, baby and dusting powder and perfume, i Renders other perfumes superfluous. One of the Cutlcura Toilet Trio (Soap.; > Ointment, Talcum). —Advertisement. His Action “Weil, howdy. Slackputter!” saluted in acquaintance from over beyond Toyheavy. "I hear teli you baffled •hero bank bandits tutber day.” "You betcha!” pridefully replied Constable Sam T. Slackputter, the faithful guardian of the peace -nd dignity of Petunia. “I—by gosh ’ —baffled ’em plumb into the tall timber before they got away.”—Kansas City Star. For true blue, use Red Cross Ball Blue. Snowy-white clothes will be sure to result. Try it and you will always use it. All good grocers have it —Advertisement. Victory for Boy t (This will cause every boy to smile. ’st least. A school teacher in Dun I stable. England, was fined for giving i a boy a whipping for disobedience at ' school. There were 20 bruises on the . boy’s shoulders and arm a. Ton B*rer can know how superior I* Dr. Prrry’i “Dead Shot" for Worm* until you hava triad It. 1» P»ail St., N. X. Adv. The man who gets caught In the rain loses all interest in silver-Uned cfouda. To please some men just tell them that they look like actors.

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