The Syracuse Journal, Volume 5, Number 39, Syracuse, Kosciusko County, 23 January 1913 — Page 6

The Syracuse Journal' GEO. O. SNYDER, Publisher. S.-racse, - ■ ■ > Indiana PREMIER POINCARE MADE PRESIDENT OF FRENCH REPUBLIC. CHOSEN ON SECOND BALLOT; ' i Wild Confusion, Out of Which Arose | Two Challenges to Duels. Marked j the Casting of the Ballots —Other ; News of the Day. i Versailles. France. .lan, 18.— Ray- I mono I -irtdry Boineare for the past ; ty. r.imriu » vni'.-'T of the French • enbir* .. was < leer-1 president ol the' republic of France yesterday by the | mit.io::::!/ assembly. co'.r jm>s. o' :he : members o both chambers of .paiMa- : ment in succession io President ; Arm d •' dlicre-.-. whose seven years’ term expires February IS. The wildest < I'idVm'.n. mi' cl which ,iro. o two: cba’u .:.-,es io dc;!s. -k.n! the cash j ihg of the ballots. Premier Poim uro | was eho - n .m* .i<i'?;.! otH he second b.’Mot, it's j.lr.ri’ii'v o,er .his near.. ' ; I'o.mpsitor, Jules Pant ', .minister of ar' i; .it. br : rg ,S7. deciding ■- a»d :*s lollow?: Raymond, Poincare, IS::; .(file Pams. 296; Marc I I’M: :hd V.'li'l.'tH R; : .-r ; TO!i i Foi:. areV first words | upon bring officially itrmnud of his election .is president of France were: i "I ■-.■.1l ,i y '•< s!;ov. wor' iiy ; Os t’u eimddpr.'.-.? of the rational as-I I shall -ory. a ithrn:; < Port I th" ..’’-'mules of > erierday mid oven the injinies. Be convinced that I | shall in. everything ami rt nil i Vines ? be an i)m>i:rt : ’I adni’.uistra- : '! '■. ■am e . •.•]••■.; Aiitc.n: -. ‘ Dubos,. the ptesidctc of the melonal 1 the voting hall, r.-ad'from a parci;-! merit ’he official record < f the elee- I tic?, which was ig.iied l.r. | While this scene was going on th? 1 i. s and senators and the st" eta- . ;m's < ruv diim the eaileries i<: rife I great hall wore also hearing the an- 1 iiouncc-nii-nt of Premier Point r re's , victory "nd tile defeat of Biles Pam-. . who was .‘>l.. Poincare’s st rouges: op-I yonent. Whisky Find Nern.'y Fatal. i Ogoatz, Pa., Jan 17.— Michael flor- ; r mr- - . ear-old son of John Morris, j <t - partly filled battle of >vhi-.ky | “and <!.:•:’)!: about two and one-I.all I ounces of the thud. He managed io i reach borne before he was overcome. , tn response to a htirrs cal! he was ; given treatment lor alcoholic poison and was then hurried to the Jewish : hospital. Physicians there worked over the boy for three hours am! saved him. ■ , Boy Horse Thief n Toils. Van Wert, O„ Jan. 17, After having eluded his pursuers, a posse of deymy sheriff-- and farmers' all day, Frederick Mertz, fifteen-year-old son of William Mertz, ot'Elwood, I.id . was raptured by a liveryman, two miles west of Fostoria, driving a horse and buggy that he had stolen from Ottawa, Ohio, and also a horse . stolen M'rom Van Wert: > Against Drunken Chauffeur. Albany. N. Y , Jan. 17.—“1 don’t think we ought to countenance drunken chauffeurs. Sober ones have hard work in dodging pedestrians." Thus ■mqke Governor Sulzer as be signed his first law as chief executive of the state. The new law provides one year’s imprisonement or a fine of SSOO or both as punishment for an intoxicated chauffeur operating a car. Robbers Snatched Pay-Roll. Hammond, Ind., Jan. 17.—Murray Franklin, cashier of a manufacturing concern here, who arrived about noon yesterday from Chicago with $.1,100 for the weekly pay-rodl,' was held up nd robbed while going frpm the depot to the factory. FYanklin was walking along the railroad tracks when attacked. . Reservoir Breaks. Bloomington, Ind., Jan. 18.—The large reservoir of the Monon railroad tn West Bloomington broke and floodxd the country for a mile south. The stone abutments on the south end wore washed out by the heavy pres--ure of tsie water. Disapoears After Epileptic Stroke. Knightstown. Ind., Jan. 17—Gresham Porter, a well-known citizen, suffered a stroke of epilepsy Tuesday in the street and falling struck his head. After recovery he ' liked away. Efforts to find’ him have failed. Archer Is Convicted. Bloomfield. Ind? Jan. 16,—-After /Xfleliberaiing. the jury in the case of David Archer, on trial for the murder of his wife, returned a verdict of manslaughter. It was a compromise verdict, about half the jurors having neen for acquittal. > * Allens Reprieved. Va.. Jan. 17.- Floyd and Claude Allen, the t’o Hillsville gunmeif sentenced to <1 today for their part in the Carrol I courthouse mur3ers, were reprieved jy Gov. Mann. Found With Throat Cut. Huntington, Ind., Jan. 15. —With his throat cut and a, bloody razor near, the body of Albert Eads, age 32, was found by Mrs. Eads at their home, south df Mt. Etna, on her return from a visit to a neighbor. Indications point to suicide.

Inn SINGS SWM SOMNQIIET Says His Farewell to Members of Clover Club. ! PRESENT AT THREE DINNERS l ’ r President Warmly Compliments Demi ocratic Party on Its Victory and ] Glories Over Defeat of Progressives. Philadelphia, Jan. 20.--President ’ William Howard Taft, who, with six I teen "standpat" Vnited States sena--1 tors., was tiie guest of honor at the i thirty-first annual Clover club ban- I I quiet here on Friday evening sang a | 1 good-humored "swan-song" and asked j for co-oneri'.tion with President-elect i Wih-mi from every American. In saying farewell to his former . greatness, the president said: "I am I now thoroughly resigned from the | presidency, not so much from my own I choice, but from the choice and vote ! Os the people.” “Rut 1 want to remind you that if < . the Republican part; did go down, to | ' defeat they did io preventing al greater calaiuib the victory of the i so-cailed Progressive party." ib re the chief executive’s . words [ ! were drowned in wild shouts ot ap- ■■ j plause that lasted fully five minuses. When this subsided President : Taft warmly complimented the Demoi crutli- pariy on its victory, saying th: it h::d been well won and addlav. th::; it would "find the. govern- ■ iii first-class condition, due to ' a 16ye.tr R.-publican rule." The president was introduced to the Clover club, tt-usyivania’s oldest Republican organization, by President Burns, who said the club ought io be i proud to have with it "the man wino i i even if def'-ated. did so much tc up-i ; hold the honor of tli? R |, publiean par-; 1 'f and its ideals." President Taft and his party, which ' : included Postmaster General Hitch-■ ■ cock anti I'n.cle Joe Cannon, arrived : in Ph'larielphia at six o’clock and i i„ went direct’.' to t-.ie Bellevue Strut- 1 ford hotel, where7 he attended the i Clover club banquet and also dropped i i in on the dinner of the Poor Richard ■ ; and City Medical clubs held in the: I name building. ' The chi' f ex- eutive was every- • v. here received, with outbursts of en-i : thusiasm A:’: his speech at the Clover club ; i the preside.-'t addressed the Medical I club and later the Poor Richard club, i After being joined by Mrs. Taft i ; here this afternoon the president left ; for New York, where he will attend I three niore banquets tonight. I HOME RULE 3ILL PASSES. ; Measure Is Adopted by House of Com- i mons by Vote of 368 to 258. London. Jan. 18. -After a long, stern I I battle the home rule bill passed the j house of commons by: a majority of lit) on Thursday. Later it was read for the first time in the house of lords. There were two divisions in the lower house. Mr. Balfour’s motion for its rejection was defeated, 258 to 368, • : wiiil<’ the third reading was ■ carried ’ by a vote of 367 to 257, one member : from each side having left the house in the interval. Air. Asquith’s home rule bill pro vides for the establishment of an Irish parliament consisting of a senate and a house of commons, with power to make laws for the peace, order and good government of Ireland. It provides.that the matters to be. excluded from the ctjifitrol of the Irish parliament are the crown, the army and navy, imperial affairs, the Irish land purchase and the old age pensions and national insurance acts, the Irish constabulary, the postoftice savings banks and public loans, In addition to those excluded by the home rule bill of 1893, which left the customs under the control of the imperial government. Provision is made for the protection of religious equality in Ireland. ATTACKS ROpSEVELT IN SUIT. Defendant in Libel Case Contends His Statements Were True. Marquette, Mich. Jan. 20. —Asserting the alleged libelous statements complained of are true, George A. Newett of Ishpeming on Friday filed in the circuit court a plea of justification in the civil suit brought against him by 'Mfeodore Roosevelt for damages of SIO,OOO. The plea says the publica tion was privileged because Colonel Roosevelt was running for office, and adds: "Defendant will further insist in his defense that at and before the time of publishing the words complained of the plaintiff had been and was guilty of the facts and acts charged, and that the statement so complained of was and is true in substance and fact.” Dies at Age of 101. Highland. 111., Jan. 20.-— Christian Janett. one hundred and one years old, died here I-Yiday, after an illness of three years. He is survived by live children, the youngest of whom is fifty-three years old. Col. Ellsworth N. Phelps Dead. Hartford. Conn., Jan. 20.—’Col. Ellsworth N. Phelps, who blocked traffic when li,e first visited Washington because of his resemblance to Fncle Sam caricatures, died at his home in Windsor Friday. New Carolina Governor Goes In. Raleigh, N. C., Jan. 17.—Locke Craig off Asheville was inaugurated as governor of North Carolina Wednesday. His address dealt principally with constructive legislation, the tax question being the main feature. Chief Justice Hartford, Justice Hall ofjpiesupreme court of Connecticut aiid a widely-known jurist. dropped while seated with other justices ktf the court at dinner in the Hueblln hotel Wednesday.

PROMINENT AMONG THE DEMOCRATIC WOMEN .Mfr x • M|B W - WiM i-'l 4a i ■ i ® w k'» •*- »«' 1 1/wMR i - M. aH J ' F ■ wil I ■yllß.-A" - 4 Hen- ar? some of the prominent; members of the Women’s National Democratic league who attended the I r.”. cut convention ol the organization. From left to right they are: Mrs. M.C. Adams, Mrs. Wi'lm.-u A ('tillop. wife ■ :.i ihe cougressm.".* frem ludiaaa; M:-. via Steitime;-r. amt Mrs. Charles LinthieumAvi'c of IB iff 1 ' e/ijr-,ve l.inI thlcum of Maryland. :

I PREMIER POINCARE CHOSEN PRESIDENT OF FRANCE Statesman Is Elected on the Second Ballot—Duel Talk Enlivens Day. Versailles, France, Jan. 20. -Raymond Poincare, premier of the French cabinet for the past year, was elected president of the republic in the na- ‘ ticnal assembly on Friday, lie will I not assume office until February 18, j as President Fallieres’ term does not : expire until that date. Tlie wildest confusion, out of which I vroge two challenges to duels, marked ; the. easting of the ballots. I Premier Poincare was chosen presiI dent on the second ballot, his plurality over his nearest competitor, Jules : Pams', minister of agriculture, being i 1.87. The deciding vote stood as i’oli lows: i Ray mond Poincare, 483. ' Jules Pams, 296. Mare f’douatil Vailit'.nt. 69. ■ ! Premier Poincare was insulted by I - x-Premier George Clemenceau! at, the ; opening of the assembly. M. Poincare ; at once appointed Aristide Briand, the i minister of justice, and L !.. Klotz, minister of finance, to act as his seconds to arrange a duel. Th? incident arose out of a letter sent by the. former pfemier to M. Poincare, the contents of which were considered offensive by M. Poincare. During the proceedings of the assembly Clemenceau made a satisfgei lory explanation to M Briand and M. Klotz, .'ho been sent to him by Premier Poincare The incident is therefore considered closed. Deputy A. De Monzie and Paul Boncour, former minister of labor, also quarreled in the corridors of the Palace of Versailles, as a result of which Al. Monzie sent his seconds to M. Eon-j ; cour. ' | =— V/EARTH Yr?H.EE FROM FLOOD V. ~ ' Many Families Driven From Homes: at Evansville, Ind. Evansville, Ind.. Jan. 18. —Many sections of built since tiny flood of 1881, when a height of 48. j feet was reached, are submerged. The residence section along aventie js flooded and many? of tin? wealthy families have been forced tq abandon their homes. In Oakdale relief work still is being carried on byboat. Provisions, fuel, newspapers and mail daily are distributed tt> those who have refused to leave. CASTRO BARRED BY ORDER. Special Inquiry Board’s Decision Excludes Him From U. S. New York, Jan. 17. —The board of special inquiry at Ellis island on Wednesday excluded Cipriano Castro froip this country on the ground that he had given evidence of moral turpitude while president of Venezuela. The attitude of Castro toward the board had most to do with his exclusion, however. His refusal to answer the chief questions propounded by the board left the impression that there existed damaging facts which he desired to conceal Admits Taking Oil Letters. Washington, Jan. 18.—The Clasp committee investigating campaign funds continued its hearing in regard to the Standard Oil correspondence. George Stump, colored, placed before the committee the confession in the form of a letter made by his brother. Charles Stump (now dead), admitting that he took the letters from John D? Archbold’s file and sold them. Dynamiter Out on $30,000 Bail. Leavenworth. Kan., Jan. 201— Charles N. Beum of Minneapolis, tinder sentence of three years for conspiracy in the dynamite cases, was released Friday on $30,000 bonds from the federal prison. Senate Deals Blow to Vice. Washington, Jan. 20.—The bill proposing to eliminate the segregated district of Washington by in. junction passed the senate Friday It is modeled upon a law in operation in lowa. $200,000 Fire at Battle Creek. Battle Creek. Mich., Jan. 18.—Fire which started in the Eldred block, a three-story structure in the center ot the business district, spread to several adjoining buildings and caused a loss of $200,000 Thursday. Allens Again Reprieved. Richmond. Va.. Jan. 18.—Floyd and Claude Allen, the two Hillsville gunmen, sentenced to die for their part in the Carroll courthouse murders last j March, were again reprieved by Governur Mann Thursday.

taw « MESM - i : (Leading Men of Industry Before House Committee. ! FIGHT OUT TARIFF ISSUE j Testimony Differs. Some Seeking to «Retain Part of Duty to Protect I Business From Foreign Trade! ■ Washington, Jan 17.—At the Wednesday hearing b> fore tliv house ways and means committee on the tariff, j sugar reiiners, beet sugar men, wine ; producers and others, appeared in ( force to tight out the issue. Noth: in 11 ■ committee’s examination o: the varying shades of sugar ■ rate views indicated any weakening ; of the Democratic tentative plan for ■ presenting ar.oth-'r free sugar bill for . action by the house at the coming extra session of congress Some of the leading men in the ■I sugar industry were nresent. Edwin ; 11. Atkins, the viee-pr 'sident and act- :( ing head of the American Sugar Refining company, proposed a moderate i reduction in the sugar tariff. i Witnesses from California. Golora- : do. Montana, Wisconsin', Michigan and j other states v '-re present to fight for tariff protection for American beet sugar interests. R. E. Milling of Franklin, 1.a., pleaded for tariff bars to avert the death knell of the sugar industry of that state. T. G. Palmer of Chicago urged the committee to make a rate of two cents a pound on raw sugar or to leave the tariff as it stands. He said that 97 per cent, of all the,beets grown in this country were raised by 75,000 or 100,- , 000 independent farmers, ail of whom were directly interested in the tariff. “Isn’t it true.” Mr. Palmer was asked, "that the beet sugar companies in Michigan are in a. combination?*' “No.” he said, "the Michigan Sugar company has six plants.” At the tariff ways and means committee on Wednesday the Waltham Watch company, alleged to be In the so-called “watch trust” and said to sell its products cheaper abroad than in the United States, was under lire. E. C. Fitch of Waltham, Mass., was on the stand and» his examination brought about several lively tilts with the members of the committee. Fitch, testifying that the company could manufacture watch dials cheaper than he could buy them abroad, said the Waltham Watch company xvas originally r capitalized at $5,000,000; that it reorganized with a capitalization of $12,000,000. tangible assets of $9,022,000 with patents and good will worth $2,975,000. “Don’i. you compel wholesalers to sell at a certain price to retailers?” asked Representative Rainey. “We try to, but don’t always succeed. Prof. S. C. Lowe Is Dead. Pasadena, Cal.. Jan. 18.- —Prof. S. C. Lowe, known the world over as the discoverer of the formula for making water gas and artificial ice, famous as an aeronaut in the Civil war and builder of the Mount Lowe observatory and incline railway, died at the home of his daughter, Mrs. Edna Wright. Professor Lowe was a native of Norristown, Pa., and eighty-one years of age. Gaiety Girl and Lord Wed. London, Jan. 18.—Miss Olive Aifay. the Gaiety girl, was married here Thursday to Lord Victor Paget, at All Saint's church in Norfolk square. A great effort had been made to keep the wedding secret. Jailed for Desecrating Flag. < Los Angeles, Cal., Jan. 18.—Joseph Colich, an Austrian, charged with having desecrated tlie American flag, was given a jail sentence of 100 days in police court here Thursday follow: ing conviction. For Direct Election of Senators. Albany, N. Y., Jan. 17. —New York state legislature went on record Wednesday as favoring the proposed amendment to the federal constitution providing for< the election of United States senators by tire people. “Jack” Johnson Is Freed. Chicago. Jam 17. —“Jack” Johnson was freed by Federal Judge Carpenter Wednesday with the warning that if he again left the jurisdiction of the court while under $30,000 bonds they would be forfeited.

PERIL IS SEEN IN BIG MONEY POWER Chicago Banker Asserts Centralization Is Public Menace —Says It Has Gone Tec Far. Washington, Jan. 18. —George M. I ‘ Reynolds, president of the Continental and Commercial National bank of Chicago, told the Pujo committee that there existed a money concentration i which was a menace to the nation, ■ ! and voiced his disapproval of the voting trust method of bank control observed in the cases of the Bankers’ Trust company and the Guarantee Trust company of New York. Mr. Reynolds said that he knew of the “tread toward concentration of : monev :tnd am: that Je ( thought it a dangerous thing. ”1 am opposed to the concentration of any sort of power,” he said. ”1 be- : lieve that concentration to the point « it has already gone is a menace, la saying that 1 do not wish to sit in : judgment en the. men who hold that, power.” Mr. Reynolds said tie was opposed to the principle, of interlocking direc- : tors iiix-potentially competing con- ! ceins, and that he had adhered to that j principle throughout his banking career. i Mr. Reynolds could not make any : specific recommendation as to remedy- j ing the concentration of money and i credit, but was sure the prevention; ( of interlocking directors in competing ; : concerns would have a good effect. Mr. j i Reynolds said he believed that “com-i I petition was not dead.” but, he be-! ! lieved banking would be improved by a return to competitive conditions. “1 am in favor of the utmost regulation and publicity,” he said. ROCKEFELLER IN BAD SHAPE Dr. C. W. Richardson Reports He Could Stand Short Quiz. Washington, Jan.- 17. —By a res- ; olution presented by Chairman Fujo'himself, the committee on Wed nesday decided that William Rockefeller may be examined by the chairman and Samuel Untermyer, the committee’s counsel, although the examination will be private and will be held in all probability in the south. The committee reached this decision after Dr. Charles W. Richardson, the physician who examined Mr. Rockefeller at Miami, Fla., took the stand and reported that the brother of the oil king could stand a short examination, but that his condition is such that a lengthy ordeal is impracticable. Doctor Richardson told the committee that his examination ojj Mr. Rockefeller had consumed about one hour. He said Mr. Rockefeller’s right vocal cord is-entirely gone and his voice is not audible at a distance of more than twenty feet. In addition to his throat disease Mr. Rockefeller suffers from palsy. Doctor Richardson reverted. MEDALS FOR 25 HEROES. Carnegie Commission Make Annual Awards as Rewards for Brave Deeds. Pittsburg, Pa., Jan. 17—At the annual meeting held Wednesday of the Carnegie Hero Fund commission, 25 medals and money awards were made as rewards for heroic deeds. Tbe mon ey disbursed among heroes or their relatives in 1912 amounted to $169,025. For disaster sufferers $25,000 will be given, for educational awards SIOO, 000. The total distributed to heroes and their relatives in the nine years of the commission is $645,206. Including disastef and educational awards the total is $1,019,668. Sulzer Pardons Brandt. Albany, N. Y . Jan. 20.--Governor Sulzer pardoned Folke E. Brandt, former valet ot' Mortimer U Schiff, the New York banker. .Friday, on the grouud that Brandt’s sentence of thirty years for burglary was excessive. Form Russo-American Body. Moscow, Jan. 20.—A Russo-Ameri-can society was formed here Friday for the purpose of cultivating mutual knowledge among the peoples of the two countries to further trade relations. N. Y. ’Change Seat $51,000. New York, Jan. 18. A New York exchange seat was sold for $51,000 Thursday, the lowest price recorded since 190 S. The low price is considered to reflect the stagnant condition of the stock market. Kills Woman and Self. Pueblo, Colo., Jam 18.—Lysander L. Johnson, eighty-two, a boyhood chum of Mark Twain at Hannibal, Mo., shot and-killed Mrs. Mary Murray, aged forty, and then blew off the top of his head Thursday. 1

o® FoWUip TROUBLE AT WOMAN'S CLUB Assertion That Husband Put on ohirt ' With One Sleeve Right Side! Out Started Fuss. “My husband did the foolishest ; i hing ?h’ts morning you ever heard of. j : When he got ,up he put on his shirt i with one sleeve right side out and the ■ ! other wrong side cut.” ■ “One sleeve wrong side out and the I I other—why, Mrs. Jipes. he couldn't ( ’ possibly have done such a thing as ( hat.” # i “Why not?” “It's a physical impossibility." “But I saw him do it.” r “You thought you did. but —” J , “’Well, like ilmt! Dispit"' my wor.l. ; do you? I’ll let you know — I “Say. Mrs. Glimmer, do you think j • anybody could put on a shirt with one ; sleeve right side out and the other ! wrong stde out?” “IL jnight if it. was ;• .ub th;’.- way; > not otherwise.” . “What did I tell you. Mrs. .11—” “That doesn’t settle i\ Mrs. Skim-j ; merhorn. Say. Mrs. Bilby, do you see j • i nrin can put his shirt on with one : sleeve wrong side out and the other j ! rigl’' strlr ::: t ‘‘Yes.” i ! “I don’t see how he could. Mrs. i Jipes.” i “Well, T saw my husband do it. i Mrs. Carsteuie, you believe mej, don’t ‘ you?” ! “Os course 1 do. There’s nothing ; absurd about that.” ; “There! Perhaps you’ll- ! “That doesn’t decide it. Look here. I Mrs. Hankins, did you ever see anyI body wearing a shirt with one sleeve ■ right side out and the other wrong side out?” ’ • 1 “I never did, Mrs. Skirnnferhorn. but if Mrs. Jipes says so I've’nu rea- ; son to—’’ • “Did you, Mrs. Winters?” “No. nor anybody else ” “So! Think I’m telling a falsehood. Ido you?’ ’ ' • . “I didn’t say so. Mrs. Jipes. but it’s I so perfectly absurd, so manifestly Im ■ possible, that—” “Cat! I’ll—” (Here the.gavel fell ) “Ladies, if you please, we will resume she consideration of ttje question’ pertaining to changing the hour i of meeting. A motion will be in or-! der.” * What She Meant. I 1 “So you think I smokt too much?” ■.he asks just to keep up a conversation that seemed to-be languishing. "Not at all,” she answered, not very skillfully concealing a yawn. "You said you thought S so ” “Pardon me. I don’t think you are smoking too much.” “Didn’t you say that I’d die if I didn’t cut it down?" "Yes, that’s what I said.” It took him a long time to get it. i and then he was quite angry. TWO VIEWS. She —I Just love a good skate. He —Yes, I would, too, if it wasn’t for. the morning after.. Only Words. The Agent—Then well consider that settled. Thttt Actor--But er what about the contract? The Agent—Oh, that’s all right. A verbal contract’ll de. The Actor—Caddie, listen. The last time I had a verbal contract I drew a verbal salary! Severe. “Is she severe with the children?” “Very. When little Willie threw the hammer through the parlor window she threatened to tell his pa when he came home.” Not Suited. “You refused the earl, Amalie, dear?” j Young Widow—He’s too old for me “But his title?” “That’s too new for me!" His Policy. “A doctor works on the reciprocity plan.” “How so?" “Whenever he pays visits, he makes •isits pay him ” His Motto? - “How do you dtand on the income ix question?” “My motto is this: ‘Give me the ih□mes of the people and I care not 1 ho collects their taxes.* ”

I MERELY SLAPPED HE? FACE After Investigation Lawyer Learns Husband “Happened xo l ave Flapron in His Ham.” A young lawyer in a southern town was sitting in his office one day when an old negro who had belonged to the lawyer’s father camo in and hailed him. says the Saturday Evening Post. “Mistah Campbell.” said. “I’se done got in a little mess count of my ole ’oman. an 1 wants you, please suh. to come ’long oVer to do cotehouse and fix it up fur me. It don’t ’mount to nothin’, but dey is talkin’ ’bout swearin’ out a writ and sendin' de constables after me.” “What’s the matter?’ ’asked the lawyer. “Well, suh.” said the old man, “you know wut a aggervatin’ qigger ’oman dat wife o' mine is? Dis mawntn’ at breakfus’ she kept on argufyin’ and ; ’sputtin’ wid me ontell 1 tip an’ slapi ped her. Dat’s all it is; 1 des slapped i her -’longside de bald once t to correct I her.” ! Leaving the old man ’a h’s office, j the lawyer crossed to the eourthouse. !He foiind that the woman was in a ’ I hospital, reported ss dangerously in- ■ jured and that a charge of assault with ! intent to kill had been lodged against I the husband. He hurried ba< k. ( "Now, Uncle Ike,’’ be said, “if you : want me to defend you. you’ve got to j tell me the truth about this whole af-' !'fair. They say your wife is badly : hurt she may not get well. What :did you.do to her?” , "Mistah Campbell.” protested the , eld man. "I done tole you de truth j I des up and slappod dat ‘oman along: : side de haid wid my hand.” “With your hand?" • ! “Yes, suh.” i "Was there anything in your hand?” i “Well, suh, since you mentions it," I said the accused, “I does seem to. re- ; call dat I happened to be holdin’ a I flatiron in my hand a* de time." SAW THROUGH HIM. I 1 Av« w v - /kmFt \ ■ iN » V Reg?..- Bluff I was go“.r 1 -ask you to '!■»> slei jhii today, but last j night’s rain has thkwed the roads. Peggy Quick Oh! I don't doubt I I shall enjoy the auto ride quite as well. Transitcry Fame. “Stems funny what a fuss they ' make over these footobali heroes'." said the fat man with the whiskers. f “Oh. I don’t know," replied tbe j other man. “It is a form of lame i that must, cßpg to a man for m»any I years.” “Do you think so?” said the fat man. “Well, my name is Grabstoek. Does that suggest anything to you?” “N-no.” r •And yet,” said the fat man. A l’m the phenomenon who the whole length of the field for a touchdown in 1903 —the most brilliant football feat of all times. What?" High Time. “This is some more of the work of ! them blamed monopolists.” said I rar : Oatley as he hung his trousers over ; the foot of the bed. i “What do you mean?” his wife asked. ; “Look at that card. It says. ‘Don’t 1 blow out the gas.’ I s’pose they want I to git us to let it burn all night, and then they’ll charge us fer it when we settle our bill in the mornin’. It’s about time we was havin’ a change of administration in this country.’’ f How She Struck Him. “Oh, yes. I know Mrs. Wadlelgh I saw her last night and she struck me as ** “1 know what you were going to say. She struck you as being about the prettiest woman in this town.” “No, that wasn’t it exactly. She struck me as I was trying to get across the street in front ot her new electric.” ' Modern Adventure. “I was stopped on the street last night and invited into the house of a perfect stranger.” x “Ah, an, Arabian Nights' adventure. What was the outcome of it all?” “Nothing hazardous. They simply had to have a fourth man to play auction bridge.” — j The Uplift "We all feel the yearning for better things sometimes,” remarked Mr. Wombat. “I’m glad to hear you say that,” responded Mr. Wombat. “Now you will understand me when I tell you that I positively must have- a willow - plume.” Generous Attitude. “Doesn’t it annoy you to have a member of your congregation go to sleep?” "No,” replied the patient clergyman, I take it as an evidence that he has profited by my previous inktruetion and has a clear conscience.” ’ Why "Boy Was Silent. “You never made a sound your father spanked you just now,” said a boy to his chum. x “No." was the reply. “Father says it-hurts m‘N' worse than it does me. and if that’s so, fte de hh own hollering."- Stray Storius. Something to Break. “The cook threatens to leave tomorrow.” ' “We must interest her.” “How can we interest her?” “I’ll have a new set of china sent home"