Terre Haute Evening Gazette, Volume 6, Number 250, Terre Haute, Vigo County, 8 April 1876 — Page 2

Page PDF (12.66 MB)

Back to issue view

d| 1 Th

Al 6 Ai /, Fi 1 Ai be O G»

!OJ

III

he £v$Mig 03HZ i.fi£. &yj

A3VKKS'I:*IA'N

I51F.'-,'.

BTATES.

"'.ns.-: solid JSTonp. riel constitute a

Sou arc. STearl*' ndvertls' is vill bu allowed monlbfy changes of matter, free of charge.

The ratss of advertIsing in the WEEKLY GASETXS'.viil be hall the rates charged

the Daily. Advertisements In both the DAILY ana WEEin^. Tvlll be charged full Daily rates and one-half the Weekly rates.

Marristges and Funeral Notices SuOO. Society Meetings and Religious Notices J5 cents each insertion.

Wants. For Sale, For Rent, Lo-1, Found, fto., five lines lor 25 cents, eacn insertion, Bad each additional line 5 cents. lxxwl Notices. 19 ceuts per line, nrst Insertion, and 5 cents each subsequent Insertion, and all notices charged for fall rates between the dash rules.

City irems ins&rted one time only, 25 cents par line. Cit*7 2^B5G cents per llr.s, nnr insertion.

Foi'bteasciiig columns '-6 per cent, will be added to the above rates.

Advertisements inserted every other day, -tvlll be c"a?.rged two-thirds of full rates. Adverf.iseBients inserted twice a week, Will be charged one-haif of full rates.

AdTertiscments insterted once each

week,

"will be charge J.

one-time

rates or

eacb Insertion. ftBWTJfffff-rnTWT* I 11 t,

Lir^

and

A mystery that none can unravel A bubble so brilliant wo gaza on marvel

That ail its gay scenery ii evc-r reced lug A volume unread, yet forever were reading:

A bargain commenced, yet still not completed A secret not kept, yet forever secreted

A mine, though discovered, it3 treasures concealing A stream, although Li.'den, its waters revoaling.

A ship, though in port, sailing A merchant unbroken, a-faillng

,-et forever 'tis

yet always

still not de-

A message, received, bu llversd: A measure unbroken, though oacb moment ^tis shivered

A portrait not painted with Time's iron crayon. But finished when Eeathhi3 fast colors shaLl lily on. .MUSI S. C. LOOMIS.

CHICAGO, March 23, 1S76,

FOUBfIN-H AM »OF W Si AL KF.

PRE PARI TO DR1VF AFJLSOS* THE OGEA.N IN

TBRI3 E DAYS.

An Asjoan-^Sug RevolnliotJ in Psavlgatioas t« 3)8 liflVeie«l tey €api. Wit' iiatiiS-lSic itl«tive

Power ©i* Fishes Already Trained.

.'From Mr: Joseph Howard's- Sunday Star.

Capt. Elijah Williams Is a^ou-thcr. beaten old sailor who lives on tlie north, shore of Long Island- For over thirty years he was engaged in the whalefi3hery, and was known as oue of the. most successful captains in the trade. He is a bachelor, and his homestead—which looks as weather beaten a3 himself—stands at the end of a creek, miles away from anv habitation. "Old Elijah"-as he'is called—is known to be ecccntrie, but

some

years ago when he put

down a fence at the mouth of the creek and was seen in a little boat, aUdavlong, talking to in vieible beings ~m the water, the neighbors thought the old man had gone crazy. Last summer a lady from the city determined to pay him a visit. Capt. 'Elijah at first threatened to put her off Di3 farm.but after a while be took her down to the cr to show her Ins wonder, which* he ta.id would revolutionize sea travelling.

The ladv followed the captain, and without hesitation stepped into a little boat with him, and was soon

the

middle of the stream The captain took in his oars and blew lus little whistle, which immediately

brought several monsters to trie

kept

I saw

v.,

*1?

Ydfe

dorfrn-on

vtgu-.

e"r~

face. The lady was so thoroughly frightened that she shrieked, aud compelled Capt. W ilhams to land her. As soon as her feet touched terra 2rma she ran home, and since then the people have verified the lady's statement, that the old man

several large pets the creek. Last Christmas the community of the

North Beach were thrown in consternation by the report that the paDtain had contracted with a ship' building firm in Port Jefferson for the construction of a vessel, to he built under

the personal

supervision

of the captain, and soon after the koe. was laid, and the ribs or a curioau construction became visible. Ine shipbuilder said that the captain was ••all right," but that the vessel would iiave neither steam or sails that the captain had discovered a power by which the.vessel could be drawn to Liverpool in three days.

The Star reporter started for the 0 captain's farm,

and

walking down

the north road founu the old cabin hid away between a cluster of trees. Ua one answering the knocking at the front door, the reporter walked Sound theSouse,

aad

bearing the

voices in the barn went toward it, and ou pushing open thedoor discov

ered

ah old maa sewing on a large strip of leather. The Captain said he had heard of Barnum training a seal, and why shouldn't we train the fish to pull us around on the water as the horses did on land? "Well, you see," continued the CaDtain, "I must commence at the commencement. When I was a boy and made my first trip on a whaler

a boat pulled by a harpooie whale about as fast as ever I seed anvthinggo. It made a deep im

passion

on me, and I made up my

mind if ever I became anybody, wouM tame a whale the same as the famers

tame

I would give up going to sea and live ibe rest of my days in quiet. I went to farming the same as other folks here, and one day I seen as how a man up East had caught a whale. That started me agoing again. I went to New Bedsord, and soon af*.er brought the young whale down here. I planked the mouth of the creek so he couldn't get out, and then I let him loose. By the time I had finished fencing the creek—for I did it all myself—I had tamed the creature 90 that br knew me, and would do any thins I wanted him to. I ehristeued him 'Brandy,' ami vtiy 'day I play ed with him for Iiu.u'S iu the water, the same as your city folks would with a kitten. He would let me ride on his back, and he used to pull my boat and play with me as long as I wanted. I then wrote to a paper in New Bedford advertising for live whale.cubs, and soon found I could get as many of them asl wanted bought four more, which I called Gin 'Sherry,' 'Port,' and 'Rum,' keeping them all in the tank at first, and playing with them till they were as tame as "Brandy." Well, time went on, and 'Brandy' is 57 feet and over and the others not

much

below that

figure. Then I made a kind of a harness and hitched up one after the other of them, and made them pull me around. About Christmas tim I thought as how my pets were trained enough for me to make a grand trial,so I went to Port Jefferson to lo'ik about me for a bigger boat. I couldn't find one exactly to my taste, so I concluded to build one, and though I ain't much on a brag, but if I don't land in Liverpool three days after leaving here, I will eat them up myself."

On asking the Captain lo show his sea coach and four, he commenced by showing some hu^e collars hanging on the wall. '-You see," 'said the Captain, "the Greenland whale is the only one I can use the head is much larger than any otuer kind, and they have a notch just back of the head, which fits the collars so as not tojnterfere with the working of the *iQ9, When the collar is on tbem, I just bitch on the traces, and the harness is all right. On each side of thsirjaws I have fastened a ring, and 1 can drive them a* easily as any farmer cau' their old horses. The thing th 't bothered me most was that the 'cr ters' would dip, aud go way down underwater, but I remedied that by attaching a straight bar of iron to the bottom of the collar. The iron bar

end ou this fiat round copper with

has a knob at the bar I fixed a piece of thin plenty of sharp ward, would You s?ee, when they go along the weight of the cooper keeps it down to the'knob, but as soon as they go lo dive the pressure of the water force* the plate up, and pricks them to the surface. It took some time to make them understand it, and when they were stuck, they kicked Up darnation.Now, however, when in harness, they mean t)U3irronf» xU the time, and just scoot right along, only tejbeii^eads now ami then to blow. I am going" to hitch the trace-" so far down as not to iuterfere with their tails."

uails pointing up-

making it so that the plate fJide up and down easily.

The Mermaid—the name given by the captain to the vessel—is almost finished, and a3 she on her shores looks very much like an ordinary vessel, bhe is25G toii3 burden.^very sharp forward, and has a straight»up and down cutwater She las nabowsprit, and her keel projects about_ two feet, ending in an immense iron hook

Her deck slants do\yn forward from midships, the slanting part having no bulwarks from the middle forward there is acovered passage, that leads to the steering house, which is immediately over the cutwater, and through this the whales will be driven by long reits. Iu this will also be placed the hoisting apparatus, which will hook and unhook the whiffletrees. From midships aft, the deck is covered with a poop deck, and on ithat a promenade will be arranged The poop will, be arranged into a gorgeous saloon, large enough to seat comfortably 250 people under that aeain is the dining room, which is a9 large as the saloon above this is further extended by a magnificent smoking room, ladies' rooms, &c., and the hold below contains 250 ele« gant berths. Under the slanting deck are the provision room, galley, men's apartments aud store rooms. The captain'intends only to carry passengers, first-class, and will only charge $50 in gold, or §75 for the round trip.

Capt. Williams then led the way to his .whale barn, which is a regular building under water, with pine planK divisions aud floor for the five monsters The divisions are regularly closed every evening,the whales going out and returning before dark. •'Brandy" is, of course, the captain's favorite, and occupies a stall nearest the shore. On being asked why he had gone to such expense in building the house under water, the captain stated that the whales had almost been blinded by the mud near shore, and that he had built the barn so that no impurities could enter. In the morning, as soon as the doors are opened, they go as far out as the fence, aud remain there almost all day.

Sursery Nonsense.

A little six-year-old daughter of a Mfithodist miuiit8r committed a fault and denied it. Her mother* learning shs was guilty, asked ber why she told the untruth, when sho replied with

great'-sangfroid:

a colt, and drive about

the sea. Many years passed, andl seen the same things many time, and have often been in a boat pulled along like lightening bj one of them. On my return, after along cruise, I found that an old maiden aunt of mine had left me this farm and a little ready money. I soon after brought a share in a whaling •hip," which I commanaed, until a few years Bines. I thought

"I should not if I be

lieved as you and father do I am Universalis!." Senator Jones' baby "is as bald as a walnut and has a comical represem blance to Joues." At the last reception it was kissed by Olive Logan anH Qen. Butler. Mrs. Jones was attired in velvet, with an overdress bordered with cloth of gold, wrought in startling colors. She absolutely looked weary and heavy laden with precious stones. "The coroner is not naeeded in such a cace," replied one of the men. '•Not needed, eh Law has been changed, eh replied the woman "Weil, times have undergone a great change in forty years. Suppose some one has gone for the sheriff haven't they ?"—]DETROIT FREE PRESS, "Beg pardon—didu't know as any one vvas dead in the house," he said moviDg back.

finished ,Aor

Currency.

Miss Kellogg's weight seems to be 175 pounds. What

does

Quebec want of a

gate? Do pigs get into Quebec and root up the garden? Rhode Islanders are making ail the noise space will allow over the coming State election.

A'Washington woman is devoutly thankful that ber husband is adray« man aud don't have to be investigated.

Kentucky will take part in the Centennial. If she had refwsed no respectable family would have spoken to her.

The Boston Bulletin has prepared an epitaph for a liar. It will probble be patented and used for home accidents.

The fashion of loading overskirts with shot to keep them down m-osfc have originated with some bulietheaded man.

One reason why men draw the street-cirs iu Constantinople is because evrybody feels sorry for the horses and asses.

Th« wife of ths Secretary nf War in 1830 dres-ied in calico. Her bus band had some character left when he retired.

Dolau has been respited again. If the Governor keeps on respiting' it won't be long before Dolan wili die of old age.

The Bosten Post thinks five cigars per day are enough for any man. Yes—if they are sent as a Christmas present.

Eochestei won't do the fair thing by Sam Patch's memory. His birthday comes and goes and provokes no enthusiasm.

A Dakota wood chopper turned hi- coaljwrong side out to scare a bi?ar The bear took the coat off and a good deal of hide with if

They have found pearls in Georgia. They did self em for SIO per pound when first discovered, but now ofTer them at $5 per bushel.

They will have a paper among the Biack Hills soon and then the gigantic canards willcomemore direct, and be made up after one fashion.

The climate of Home is said to be getting first-rate for the agua. Some of the swamp townships of Michigan will shake iu chorus with her.

It has been two or three days since that sis million suit was decided against Tweed, and he hasn't paid in the cash yet. Some-thing wrong there.

A. Chicago alderman contends that lying is not wicked where the liar has no object in lying. This is food for hew thought* Call the convention to oder.

About next week, or the week after, or pretty soon after that, a paragrapher can hesitatingly remarks that the back-bone of winter seems to be

TittT

Winslow either didn't steal haifas much as the papers say, or elce he is a first-class hand at hiding. If he didn't steal at least $200,000 he ought to be punished.

None of the editors of j|the Boston" Post will go down to the harbor to meet Winslow. After he gets into town the staff will go over and IOOJI at him through the bars.

Cincinnati voted Tuesday by 10,000 majority to issue $3,000,300 bonds in behalf .of tha Cincsnnati Southern Eailroad, makihg $16,-000,000 in all.

The Bank of the State of New York suspended payment Tuesday. Developments show a remarkably loose management on ths part of the Bank officers. Its Vice-President is one of its heaviest debtors* It is not thought this failure will have any marked effect on Wall street.

The New Hampshire election took place Tuesday, and resulted in the election of Cheney, the .Republican candidate for Governor, by over 3'000 majoriity, and a Republican majority in both branches of the Legisature. The Republican also elect four of the five Courncillora.

The New York Greenback Con vention met iu Syracuse Wednes day, and decided to send adelegatio to the Democratic National Con en tiohand demand admtitance as Dem ocrats.

The wife of ex-Senator Schurz died in New York Tuesday afternoon. An excursion party from the Northwsst, the Michigan delegation numbering 125, reaching Atlanta, Gaorga," Wdneaday, and web cordially received, They will Extend their trip to Florida.

The railway companies (jf the United Stat28 and Canada have adopted last summer's time schedule, with a few trifling variations.

The $20,000 libel euit agaifst the Minneapolis Tribune for chargeing Isaac W.Arnold with beating jliis sister resulted in favor of the niwspaper' gt, Patrick's day was very generally observed throughout the coun* try, notwithstanding the severt snow stosm which prevailed in most sections.

Golden Gate, Rsvenue, Poster, Chance and Hockhocking will run two miles and repeat at th« Bay District, San Franctsco, track on the 25th inst.

The rush of people to the Blaek Hills increases. A good many newspaper are, asserting that two shillings per head is charge enough to see the Centennail exhibiiion* They shoutdn't put this thiag down below a juggler's seance.

Victor Hugo believes in cremation, but there are a good many people who don't belive in iVctor Hugo.

f.T 'tr*»^ ^..v^ .* "r

$50'000

Auburn lights her streets by naptha lamps at a cost of four cents each per ntgbt. A lamp-post is worth more than that per nsght for an Auburn alderman to hang to as he tries to get his compass pointr

The Philadelpaia Chronicle thinks that an honest, decent man has no business in Washiugton which should detain him over three days, and he ought to be fumigated when he comes away.

The City of Toledo can't agree with the Toledo Gaa Company as to what is a fair price for gas, and as a consequence there is nr light arid no pay, The misunderstanding is entitled "Pitch darkness it extortion.

Selected Murp-:.

The man who had a project cu foot went to a corn-doctor. Always be a? witty as you can with your parting bow your last speech is the oue remembered,

Vesuvius smokes, but has no other small vices.—[Phila. Star. If men would fet good ex*tuples, they might hatch better ljabiL

If you would pass for more than your value, say little. It is easier to look wise than to talk wise.

If you would be known and not know, vrigetate iu a village if you would know and not be known, live in a city.

No man"-' can become thoroughly acquainted with his family history without running for office. "What's going ou said a well known bore to Douglas Jerrold, "I am," was the reply, and ou he went,

A physician boasted at dinner that he cured his own hams, when one of his guests remarked: "Doctor I'd sooner be your ham than your patient." "We "never know what frail cretures we are," says Mr. Marrowfat, until we sit down to cut our corn, and tha knife slips."

An Irishman recently soliliquized "What a waste of money to be buying mate when you know the half of it is bone, while you can spend it ior whisky that hasn't a bone in it."

Some mean failow, after saying there is one physician to every 800 inhabitants, adds that they begin this way, but that after a while there are not «o many inhabitants!

The following advertisement lately appeared in an English Newspaper: "A pianoforte to be sold, genuine Broad wood, by a lady about to leave Eugland in a rosewood casa on mahogany casters."

There i3 an Arabic proverb to the effect that if you pitch a lucky man into theNile'he will come up with a fish in his mouth, while the unlucky man will come up iu a fish's mouth.

Says an occasional contributor: A revivalist grocer on Sixth avenue displays the sign, "Held the Fort een eggs for 25 cents." He must be a Layman.—LN.^Y- Commercial Ad--vertiaferi" "A skiff was turned over in the river yesterday, and Mt. Tyler was thrown into the water."—[Louisville Ledger.] A clear case of tip-a canoe and Tyler too.—[Index Appeal.

A Freneb surgeon, noticing that the foot aud mouth disease does not attack cattle affected with cowpox, vaccinated 26 oxen, and not one of them had the disease, though living with auimals largely infected with it.

Message and reply sent and received at a Waterburg, Conn., telegraph office: "I am dying come as soon as you can." "I cannot come wheu you die, let me know," That can be discounted by messages received and sent through the telegraph office iu this city: "Come at once, Polly is dying." Answer: "Cac't come tell the o'd lady to brace up add die game."

ft Petlicoat Fleasantries. A barber shop was opened at Alanta, on Saturday, all the operatives be ing young girls.

Mrs. B. Herman has been elected City Treasurer of Toronto, Ont. New England would speedily give women the suffrage were it not for the fact that women, if united in that section, would outvote the men.

The Treasury girls who formerly di vided the contents of their lunch-bas-kets with Mrs. Senator Christiancy haVe not yet been invited to call.

Nothing will dry a women's eyes and check her sobs quicker, at a fuueral, than the detection of a new style of flounce on a neighboring mourner's dress.

The Danbury News says "Long hair is a glory to a woman unless she neglects to clear the comb and brush before ber husband has occasion to use them." "Don't you think," said a husband in a mild form of rebuke to his wife, that women are possessed by the devil "Yes," was the answer, "as soon as they are married."

When two women in a family are trying to tell the same thing at the same time, it is an auspicious opportunity for the men folks to vanish.

Waists of evening dresses are now laced at the back. This is important, for in case a young lady is

ought to

£ik#»

Paris paper complimented him when it called him "One grand lair Hugo." Passengers who are snow-block-aded on the Western railroads ate provisioned by the company. They have their choice between crackers and herring and water or crackers and chees with frozen cider,

female

know, where to strike for her capitalist.

is too often trampled down

without a just cause." A couple were recently married a Waynesboro, Pensylvania., the bride being seventyflve and the groom seventy-one. The latter had never been mareied before, and he was so overcome that he fainted at the con-i elusion of the ceremony,-which incident led the newly married wife to

wsm^

muti

exclaim, ?oor fellow, I have feared all along that ho couldn't stand it." Receo tly afi In^ianasdhoolmistress attempted to whip

big boy after

school, when he threw his arms about ber and kissed her, and got off without a licking. Another bov in another town read this item and thought he'd try the same thing He threw his arms about the schoolma'am aud kissed her, and then he

became aware of an earthquake. She I

floored bim and thrashed him aw* fully. This schoolma'am bad a grown -up beau of her own that was the difference*

5 Orthodox Odities. The best prayers are thosa which you try to answer yourself, after you have uttered them.

ANew England evangelist who hud gone out to Davenport, Iowa, to battle with Satan, returned Kaat last week pith a black eye.

It is impossible to find a suggestion in this bit of a story. '*Is the cermon done?" some one asked as ho meta member of the church. "Jfo, no, man, it is preached, but it still remains to be done."

In England they toll how Sankey walked up| to a grenadier, and, taking him affectionately by the belt, said: "Young mau, I likewise am a soldier, a soldier of Heaven. "Old 'nn," returned the grenadier, "you're a long way from your barrachs, anyhow." "Feilow travelers," said a colored preacher, "el I had been eatin' dried apples lor

week, and den took to

drinkin' fr a monf. I couldn't feel more swelled up dan I am dis minnit wid pride and vanity at seein' such full 'tendance har."

The Failing Passion.—Prison Chaplain (charged to report on convict's reJigious knowledge)—'.'Do you know the Commandmonts. Prisoner—"Yes, sir." Prison Chaplain—"Say the eight." Prisoner (promptly) "Thou shalt do

manner of work thou, nor

thy son, nor thy daughter," «fec. .SgPeople who attend church cannot b« too well guarded against surprises. It shocks everybody present when a careless boy in tha gallery drops his hymn book down on the deacon's head, to see him mssh his knees against the back ot his neighbor's pew aud hear him snort right out "O Gosh."

List month some Nevada miners got hold of a lugubrious looking individual, professing to be a Brooklyn evangelist and mopped all the "true inwardness" out of him. When they let him up. the leader of the band said to bim: "Now you can git, pard, we ain't agin Christianity out here, and it riles us to see a feller spilin' it,"

Yonkers Gazotte: It is amusing to watch the ordinary wowan drop 2 oents into the collection plate at church on Sunday morning. She manages to hold the coin so that nobody can see it, and carefully rufiles Up the other money in the plate ss that even the collector cannot tell whether she put in one cent or fifty.

Daniel Drews' son-in-law, the R9V. Mr. Clapp, with cbildlide simplicity some time ago withdrew, his wife's fortune from the keeping of her father, and invested it separately. She is now a milliouare and Daniel is a beggar. Mrs. Clapp,s money, it is scarcely nesessa&y to sayy was not left ia Wall street among the sharks.

Now York Commercial: "I am canvassing," remarked a sober faced man, with a bundle under his arm, as he entered an up-town hotel and timidly faced the bland and be-diamon-ed clerk presiding at the counter "I'm a canvasser for a Centennial Bible, and hope you will excuse me if I" "Oh! certainly, sir, that's no objection I'll treat you just as well as we do any other guest please register. Three dollars sir." He mildly remarked there must be some misunderstanding—and left.

This legend has the ring of true music about it:.— A certain pacha, dead five thousand years,

Once from his harem iled in sudden tears, Aud bad*thi3 sentence on the city's gate Deeply engraved:—"Only God is great!" So these four words, above the city's noise, Hung like the accents of an angel's voice, And evermore from th© high barbtcan .» Salute each returning caravan. Lost i3 that city's glory. Every guest Lilts with crisp leaves the unknown pacha's dust, And all is ruin, save one wrinkled gate, Whereon is written. "Only God is great!"

The Emma Mine Helms Chicago Letter to the Graphic The young lady after whom the famous Emma Mine is named is a boarding pupil at Miss Grant's fin ishing school fo youag ladies, on Northern Dearborn street, an aristocratic stone mansion, with^ an air of exclusive gentility about it. She is a tall blonde, with a satin-smooth, ivory-tinted skin, and light, waving brown hair, which was coiled in a loftse, classic knot at the back Her dress wass a simple Maria Louise blue. Along scarf of black lace was tied abont her throat. She was guiltless of the smallest peice of jewelry, and her long, slender fingers were unadorned by a single ring. A soft fringe of curling hair outlined a low, wide brow* This was Emma Chisholm, sole daughter of the house aud heart of Robert Bruce|Chisholm. of

xu. Elgin, 111., a few years ago half owntaken with shortness of breath a man er of the Emma Mine, now a retired

relief the very first pop. Miss Chisholm who laughed merri A Cleveland woman recently mar-: iy, and said: ried a Chinese laundryman, andj "Well

explanation, *lToo muchee dam'of the mine unpleasant at first,

schoolmaster, Mollie says: "Although I am only fifteen years of age, I am well aware that the poor

but

Mollie Stockton, of Winnemucca, ye?rS I y^ted ^e mine, and Nevada, publishes a card in the Sil- enjoyed the t£ip very much, especialver State, explaining why she was iml™irinu^ compelled to "put a head" on her Alta, theilittlo villiage at

explained my visit to

three days thereafter tLe Celestial {terview, and all those newspaper reappeared at a barber's shop and or-! ports have been solicited from papa dered his pig-tail cut off, saying, in and the boys.

have always eludod an in

found the notoriety

do not mind it|,now. Three

the mine.

I found the miners enjoying a brand of cigars calle,d "The Little Emma, aDd they had actually had my. picture on the box." The youug lady laughed merrily at the reccollection. She further added that she was only ten years old when her brother William named the mine aftar he'r as a voluntary peace offering, as she was constanily importuning him to "come home to his dear Emma," She was born in eastern Minnesota, May 6, 1859. C'VV"

vi#

HA'W*

•fem-fcii

Yihe People.

Because a man has lived in the city all his days no one need imagine that he isn't posted in all that pertains to agriculture and horticulture, botany, etc. Such a man is even betier posted than he who makes it his business to sow and reap and pruue. A gentleman living ou Fort street^west yestarday employed a gardener to

8bade

gardener bad just

when

marked:

tree a little. The or and re- tVJLv

a lawyer rassed

Do you want to kill that tree? iV%T 4 T. you don't you had better let it alone|jJllA/ iVJLi* for at least two weeks longer." ,c

The gardener fixed his Iadderr and put the saw into the limb, and a doctor came along and said: $ "You'll kUl that tree stone dead if |g you cut a limb off! You ought toj# i". have pruned it three weeks ago."

The gardener had tried two 03 A three limbj when a banker halted under the tree and exclaimed: £v "Good heavens Arc you insaue You shouldu't touch that tree till, -j

ftMS-tJilVE

trim it now

Brush street yesterday for exercise,

bnt soon lay down and died. A

that the last few day3 of March werevP now really tne only day in the whole"1 year when limbs could safely belop-v ped off. I

bnC^,ng

crowd had gathered around the body ,ol^d get

when an old lady came along, push-

Obstacles

DR. CHAS. P. MARSHALL, 64 Niagara Street, Buffalo, N. Y.

P. S.—Persons suffering with Incipient Consumption, Catarrh, Bronchitis, or any throat or lung affection, win &na this a sure cure.

Destructive Explosion

IMPOSSIBLE.

By the use of

ABBOTT'S Patent Safety Boiler,

For Hot ater or tow snre Steam.

REGISTORS,

Rothschild

!."-i

The gardener expected such expressions to be hurled an him. and he kept at his work without heeding! them. Pretty soon a cler: --^ymani sauntered up, saluted the tjee-trim mer with a pleasent "good morn ing," and added that it made his®] heart glad to see a man trimmings trees in the right season. He said

.. —7.

ackirig a score ot

The gardener wa9 just finishingtkeieW TOOmS job when an insurance mau, who never lived a day out. toYake a vacation, cS Of Main Street corner, halted, scowled fiercely and' said: "See here! What kind of a »8»fe jra House. er are you, anyway If you don't tit a rope around the body of that tredibs Family Performance. the sap will all run into the rooU&ly had a comedy which and the top will die!" iiight on a steamboat at the

The tree is still in position'to heaif118

The Philadelphia boot-blacks havej:h®^f^eck Taking decided not to charge over ten centsg Si

,pa'L°.f

who

bo?!3

the Centennial. Ibis will allow a--.

Po?fcf

A horse which had been sick for

some days was led up und down

goods in

on the

w.h*rf-

further remaks. *at paiuteniiad ascended to one of theitaamer Natchez' There is said to be a bogus Dr.i by means"of tackle, and Mary Walker around. She can'ta narrow balcony formed deceive ony one, however. No other'wickerwork around the woman in this world can hitch up af the chimneys. He was pair of pantaloons in that graceful, there, about 100 feet careless way which is second-nature.®" deck, when, shifting the to the Doctor. .correspond with a change

•Lat'n®«r'

^UMnsfdeclnlng safely. It was

eveniDg

thlen, and all

tav." eaptfls and .crew to n-iv- oeen

fDajnter

forced to stay at home. faj|ed of success. They A man with a load of feathers on!?et"£etherladders enough his arm called at a house on Mont-*1!11 hw calm street yesterday, aud after re-^ peated knocking on the door an old-^hicb I1® ™,,g lady, whose eyes were red with weep-^ ^,-,- ing, opened it. ®P^ meantime *.4he painter "Thera is no one dead," she repliedwnt observer of.the collectsadly, "but there might as well be. jS .on the levee. The deMy daughter is dead in love with a spectators laughed and fruit tree agent from Syracuse, and iiad the sun fell and all the I shan't look at a currant bush or a dark. Latimer did not grape vine this whole summer with- ne to his evening meal, out wishing that some, steamboat ||children came and saw had blowed me up when I was a it the ticklish position of baby!" rector. They huddled toin go a ok

from.his uupleas-

thechimney.

The cap-

tryfng

i|JK

ed her way through the circle, and

asked.

to, extri-

tbat nigtt, ?-but

and

soon developed.

The doys went into the alley and: The Captain the plaster was fastened to a lad's woman that if the high bare legAfter having -'set," the performer did not com plaster. the inventor. i,",n ifvro the scheme walkde away ?uld. iSi four or five feet, holding a:1 she^b^W-f kws-her husa a to the plaster. The "test" was toletli tuat piaster be walked off the leffl^^^S^^wn I ^chimney in N iiifRepublican.

without the victim uttering a yel«.i(

the

ail 8ta |m near

a'nd 8pent

th©

^ere, at the man

and Bhoutiug

to him

getting his answers,

9 prevent him from- -falling

Ball Day Sports. id also falling down the "Big English," the boot-black, So they kept up a io.ud has strudk another bonanza for Jon and carried on the comwearing away tha monotony of ai.^ night It 'was very dull day. He appeared at the post- the wharf -audience, efficeyesterday with a pitch-plaster, ^-serious to the aciand his plans were

a Serious Family per-

c| imn- N~

A pitch"plaster sticketh closer than ^i. RprjuMjoon a brother, and though the average Detroit boy is full of grit, the piaster—^ didn't let go until wild yells of Wllllams Getting Better, "murder!" were heard for a block ihe_past few days lie report away.—]DETROIT FREE PKESS. bywilliams, the popular acing, has got afloat several __ aitruth is, Mr. Williams baa

Orleans.

Marriage, oil of dying just nowl and his

Happy Keller tor YoHng ss.eS fro i« determined not to let him ttieetreou of Error* and Abates

inearl7

®i»ill or no. Mr. Williams

life. Manhood rentoretf. impedimenta toJBrfnir ,from rplearoMarrlageremoved. New method ot treat-tiWeh has- had a N a a a A Books and Circulars sent free, In sealed th! envelopes. iM£,sudden changes in the

Address, HOWARD ASSOCIATION No. ^AtrflrBfr attaCke'd on the 419 North Ninth 8t„ Philadelphia. Pa.—an wTntt tn Riwttin. whithlM^ltntioH paving a high repatatlon for 2^^ |p^i ap ongag«mftnt. at leatera there. H$, return-

A Card to the SrtrertK.f5««Si^IBf "TK1

every sufferer will try this remedy, as it, will cost him nothing, and may prove an inestimable boon. Parties wishing it will please address,

3-a

&s^sisssss^x

for the care of Nervous Debility, Prema- rifcinal illness :haa beeu tare Decay, Seminal Weakness, and all he HTI. and treatforms of_Nervons Affections. He hopesfj|e patient is nowpciticipally

fad, whletrhas: fited—this diseaae AlWHys se-

£e in po

rting thftoerves. Sir. Will-

longer Ventirely contined to sets up frequently and it the house.--:He eat» well, punches 'with a good reljen begins to rebel. agaiaat' Ifor persisting in giving him KNew York World. p—

icti^c Explosion

POSSIBLE.

B/tlaeuMof

WT'S Patent Safety ^Boiler,

eg-

ECISTORS, RADIATORS n«IIOi SMOKE PlPJE, PtMp| Ac®1

Crane, Bree4 & CoM

est Sightla St.,

683-715

C0C05AJI, OHIO.

a A, '"t1"-

'y-'fA

..y

or Xow Vtei-

||^»ore Steam. ill, H4DIITOU, t!OIU ifcxxnrm,

ill

Bree4 & (lol

SV:,!

iLTI, OHIO.

-5

Notice.

•$Jkmea H. •Oik on the jld«d bull sap

|day to

Notaries or

ttndH.

tUbeforeWm.

Harper, J.

MAMINHOLLXNG'EK, ciert,