Bloomington Telephone, Volume 14, Number 26, Bloomington, Monroe County, 23 August 1889 — Page 3

Bloomington Telephone BLOOMINGTON, INDIANA. WALTER & BRADFUTE, - - PttbushO.

Antxat:ox to the United States lias becoihe so popular in Newfoundland as causo anxiety in London. The father of Mrs. Ward, the author of "llobert Elsmere," is Thomas Arnold, son of the great master at Rugby, And brother of Matthew Arnold.

Some years ago John McClure took up a piece of cactus land in Los Angeles County, California, and set it to grapes, last spring he refused $150,000 for the place. The grain speculators of Minneapolis re gnashing their teeth because the oity authorities have assessed 8,000,000 bushels of wheat in the elevators, there, a thing never before done. Not only does every male child born in America stand a chance of becoming President, but he may be the lawn tenuis champion of the United States. There's a prospect to encourage a boy 1 J. M. Ball, of Pierce County, Ga., killed a rattlesnake near his wood rack. Mr. Ball shot it four times with his Winchester, and jjwhen killed it was found that it had swallowed two large rabbits. Charles M. Heed, of Erie, offers to pay off the debt of that city, amounting to $1,100,000, if it will give him the water-works. The revenue from the water-works service last year amounted to $74,000. After being totally blind for fifteen years, Mrs. Todd Lattie, of Bronson, Mich., was suddenly cured. The first person that she saw was her daughter, and her first remark was, "My, how you've grown. A toweb similar in design to the Eiffel tower at Paris is to be built at Eagle Bock, N. J. It will be but 400 feet high, but will be on a lofty summit. The electric light on its top will be visible far out at sea.

over, nevor remains seatei when Bis marck is makiug his reports. Writing of Wales to a friend in that country, Mr. Buskin says: ''My respect for its ancient and heroic nation ality is, indeed, limitless; and well could I wish for England's own sake that beyond the Severn the modes of life, the language, the music and the hearts of the people she once oppressed so cruelly might remain forever in forgiven esss, as your stones of Aberystwith are wrought by the cruel sea to their fairest colors."

E. W. Johnson, a livery-stable keeper of Amsterdam, while out in a buggy paw the cloud-burst which deluged Johnstown, N. Y., and says it whs not a meeting of clouds which caused the precipitation, but the overtaking of an immense white cloud bv an immense black one, the black one milking a spurt by the aid of a current of wind, and piling up on the white one. In about five miniates a large farm was converted into a lake.

The officers of our army and navy are the most dissatisfied people in the country. Most of them are chronic applicants for better positions, and are always smelling out prospective vacancies and pushing claims. The Prince of Wales is head over heels iu debt despite the fact that he receives from the English people about $265,000 per year, London bankers, it is said, quietly fight shy of his paper even when proffered by him.

The clothing worn by the Prince of !

of Wales is copied so minutely by his English admirers that Mr. Labouchere asserts that if the Prince were to ap- j pear in petticoats the streets of London ! won a coon be filled with men in the !

same garments.

A countess whose affairs have re

cently been brought into court in Paris !

is recorded as having spent during a year 65,000 francs on dressej, 41,000 on jewelry, 17,000 ou millinery, 5,000 on photographs, 2,000 on boots, 200 on ecent, and 100 on books. Gehonimo, the wicked Apache who has been a prisoner of the government

for some time, has grown so fat that he looks very little like an ideal chieftain. He was not well at Fort Augustine, but

at Mount Vernon Barracks, Ala., he has increased in weight rapidly. In a lawsuit in Kentucky the other day it was proved, that a horse which, had kicked three men to death and had run away five times was warranted "perfectly gentle and safe for any lady to drive." Now and then there is a horse-trader who is absent minded in his statements.

On one occasion, on seeing a dish of oysters that had been prepared with bread crumbs, Thackeray observed that he didn't see why a man should be a slave to his stomach," and though unwell he devoured the same with gusto, which shows that Thackeray was more of a slave than he knew.

Not long since Fred Barfield of Unadilla, in Dooly county, Ga., heard a chicken squalling in his yard, and went out to see what was the matter. He found a large toad-frog attached to the wing of the chicken, trying to swallow an object twice as large as himself. He had to kill the frog to get him loose. Inside of an old disused pump well near Wheeling, W. Va., a couple of blue birds have taken up their abode and built a nest, in which are several eggs. The owner of the property, curious as to how the birds attended to their paternal duti'js, discovered, on watching them, that they obtained access o the nest by entering by the "spout" of the pump. According to custom Premier Bis

marck always remains standing when talking about affairs of state to the Kaiser. As the old Chancellor suffers from rheumatism, this is not an easy j

saennce to ceremony, uui ne nas sucn a deep-rooted respect for loyalty that he refuses to give iu to the infirmities of in this matter. The Kaiser, how-

Ex-KiNa Milan of Servia, will reside in Paris for a time. He is after the late Due de Moray's house, on the Champs Elysees. He has an allowance of $90,000 a year from the Servian civil list, but he is likely to spend $190,000. He is deeply in debt, and owes the Emperor of Austria and the Servian treasury large sums. He also has an unsettled wine score around the corner. It is believed in Europe that Bussia paid him a large sum to abdicate. What becomes of all the paper? There are 1,000 pulp aud paper mills at work the year round. But the newspapers and magazines consume vast quantities of it. The Century Com

pany take nearly two hundred tons a month for their publications, and their paper bill amounts to $300,000 yearly. Harper & Brothers take 25,000 reams, Bobert Bonner 10,000 reams at a time. Two cheap literature firms buy $.500,000 worth of paper a year. One patent medicine firm buys $30(0,000 worth of paper a year. Two famous explorers of the present day began life in a state of object penury. Stanley, the finder of Livingston, livedin a workhouse until he was thirteen years old. Vambery, at th? age of eleven, was looking about hungrily for errands ami street "jobs" of all sorts, He was for a time a "boots," or something of the kind in a village inn. He taught himself to read and write. Yet in spite of all these stupendous difficulties he worked his way to the temple of learning, and now he is a professor iu Pesth, and one of the best linguists in the world. In the Naval Academy at Annapolis the cadets are not allowed te decorate their rooms or add to the furniture provided by the authorities. The quarters of one student are exactly like t hose of another, and all are furnished with Spartan simplicity, the object of the restriction being to prevent the jealousy which might arise if the rich cadets were permitted to surround themselves with luxuries beyond the reach of their less fortunate classmates. It would be well if all our great colleges and universities should unite and prevent the present extravagance of young lusn in college. It is growing to be one of the great evils of collegiate education in these days. The business of the Eiffel tower turns out to be immense. M. Eiffel calculated that when everything was in working order the gate money would be $5,000 a day. Since the lifts have been in operation he is thought to have averaged more than this. It costs a franc to enter the tower, two francs to get up in the lift to the second floor, and four francs to the top. On any one of the ordinary full-price days more than 20, 000 people have paid admission, and, with the increased prices for those using the elevator, the entire receipts exceed $10,000. The original cost of the Eiffel tower, all included was a little less than $1,000,000. The proprietor has to keep it in repair and hand over one-fourth of his gate money to the exhibition. It is estimated that it will be half paid for when the exhibition closes, and then it will remain certainlv three vears more, and perhaps ten. Lynch law originated in Virginia, before the Eevolutionary war. At that

period the country was thinly 'settled I

and was infested with Tories and desperadoes too many of them, apparentlv, for the local authorities to adequately punish. Col. Charles Lynch, a distinguished officer of the Revolution

ary war, undertook to rid his country of !

the outlaws. He organized a force, arrested the outlaws, and having satisfied himself and comrades of the guilt of the accused, executed them without reference to the constituted authorities.

While not altogether approving of the desperate remedy for a desperate cause, the beneficial effect of Col. Lyr.ch's ac- j tiou was recognized, and has since been I

known as "Lynch's law" or ''Lynch law' His process of meting out speedy justice extended to other part of the coun

try, and it is a well recognized form ol .

redress of grievances to-day, particularly for that class of offenses that are popularly believed not to be adequately punished by the statutes and courts of the , State. Col. Lynch's brother gave his name to Lynchburg, aud left a son who was subaoquently Governor of Let iaiana.

BURNED AT THE STAKE. Capt. William Crawford's Horrible Fate - His Broken Sword Found Recently. The recent discovery of the portion of a sword in Seneca County, and the supposition that it once belonged to Col. Crawford brings to mind, says the Toledo Blade, the terrible sacrifice of that pioneer by the savages, and the connection of the renegade, Simon Girty, with the torture 107 years ago June 11. The savage Wyandottes and Shawnees in that year so harassed the settlers that a strong force of woodsmen were raised in Western Pennsylvania and sent to subdue them. Col. William Crawford, a pioneer, and a man who was never accused of fear, was placed in command. Early in June, after long and weary tramping through the marshes and woods, a sharp battle was fought with the Indians. So strong did the opposing force appear to the troops that they fled from the battle-field and Crawford, with many others, was captured. With great rejoicing the white chief and his companions were marched to the chief village of the Wyandottes. Stripped and beaten with clubs in the terrible gantlet, the men knew that they must meet death at the stake, for the fires were already kindled. Crawford's hands were tied firmly behind his back, and with heavy thongs bound to the stake. The pile of word, dry as tinder, was lighted, and with a hiss the blaze leaped about the body of the doomed man. In calling distance, sitting upon his horse, calmly watching the operations, sat the white savage whose name will go down to infamy blacker than Benedict Arnold's. "Girtv! Girty!" cried Crawford as he felt the scorching breath of the fire. "Do they mean to burn me?'' "Yes," replied the wretch, a malignant smile spreading over his face. Crawford set his lips, and, through all the horrible pain which he survived for more than two hours, only once did he cry out in agony. Then as the hellish tiands danced about him, pressing firebrands into the flesh, now and then putting out the fire to prolong his misery, the soldier cried out : "Girty! Girty! For God's sake shoot me through the heart! Don't refuse me! Quick! Quick!" But the fiend only smiled and said: "Don't you see I have no gun?" Crawford said no more. He soon fainted from the pain and suffocation, only to be roused by some new torture, and, praying for death to end his sufferings, the prayer was answered. His black and swollen body lay a mass of chaired flesh at the foot of the nearly consumed stake, to be brought up again and again in memory as condemnation for the savage and bestial Wyandottes. The white savage who witnessed this was more of an Indian than the reddestblooded Shawnees. His parents, brutal and bestial almost as the savages themselves, jealous of being promoted when in the colonial service, deserting like Arnold to the British, he plunged into the most hideous massacres and diabolical tortures with the glee of a demon. It is to the credit of this man that he saved the life of his old friend, Simon Kenton. In all the blackness of his career this is the one spot of honor and justness. Kenton had for years been a scout. He knew the forest from the Alleghenies to the great lakes and the Mississippi. In Lord Dunmore's expedition he and Girty had been bosom friends and boon companions. Now, when captured, Kenton, standing before the Indian council condemned to die, was to burn in the morning. Girty was present. Seven scalps of white men hung at his belt and seven white prisoners were in his train. "What is your name?" said the outlaw to Kenton. "Simon Butler," for that was the real name of Kenton. The renegade threw his arms around the old scout's neck and begged him to forgive his rudeness. "Sime. he said, "I know you are condemned to die, but, though it shall go hard with me, I shall save you from that." Girty begged of the Indians for the release of his old friend. He said it was the first time he had made such a request. They knew he was a brave warrior, and he shook the bloody trophies of his expedition aloft. A long debate followed. Indian eloquence was for a time plentiful, but at last, when the vote was taken., Girty had

won and Kenton was free to live. Present at St. Clair's defeat, Girty was far enough away when Mad Anthony Wayne struck destruction and terror to savage hearts along the Maumee in 1794 to escape to Canada, where on a farm he spent the most of his life, dying in 1818, near Malden. The Great Unsailed Ocean. There is a fascination in aerial navigation which no amount of failure and disappointment seems to abate. The late ascension of Prof. Hogan and its fatal ending will only serve to intensify the longings of other adventurers to master a problem which, when finally solved, may revolutionize travel and transportation. The activities of modern life call for an endless shifting of human beings and their productions. To overcome the necessary resistance encountered on

land and water requires an enormous expenditure of labor and machinery. Yet all the while wo are enveloped in "a

boundless ocean of air, wherein surge j

no shattering billows, which is exceedingly buoyant, and which oilers little natural resistance to locomotion. Could the problem of utilizing its buovancv

and vast expanse once be solved, the :

whole lace of things on this earth would bo changed. Nor is the problem in and of itself, beset with appalling difficulties. The air is waiting to lift any amount of burdons. The discovery for which the world still waits is some substance at the same time so light and strong as to withstand the pressure when the vessel into which it is constructed is emptied of air, or durable enough to admit of the construction of propelling machinery when the atmosphere within it is displaced Jjy some lighter gas. The promise of such a substance,

upon which science is working until, ingly, is found in the newly discovered methods of producing tho metallic base, aluminum. The greatest living expert in the developement of this substance died recently and carried , Ins secret with him, leaving, it is claimed, no custodian of it behind. But the stepping ou of one man in these days is only a momentary check in tho pursuit among new realms of discovery, and the possibilities of matter in this line will eventually be realized in marvelous results, The intense fascination of aerial navigation is not to be wondered at. Avast sea, opening up almost fabulous possibilities for the human race, lies waiting but with one seemingly simple discov cry barring the wuy to its utilization. Whoever forges that key will open the widest door of human progress leading into the future. Boston Globe. He Missed the Train. The Governor sat in his easv chair, a spy-glass at his eye "Has anyone seen 3,000 men and a train of cars go by? A pilot train with the bad men on, one more, and another one still; with rattle of wheels and clang of bell, and shriek of the whistle shrill? They travel not as the flying skip, in silence and in fear, they whoop and holler and howl and yell for all the world to hear. They hr.ye advertised the place of tho fight, for six long weeks or more, and I fear that T. cannot find the place, till the brutal fight is o'er. Oh, rally and squander, my men at arms, and look if you may see where three railway trains and 3,000 men have hidden away from

me. They rallied and squandered, those men at arms, they searched the country through; aud another Governor came along and joined the searchers too. They looked in the clock and under the stairs, and under the bed they peered, and out in the kitchen and everywhere, but the trains had disappeared. They felt in their pockets and looked in their hats, and lowered a man down the well, but whore all those sluggers had disappeared to, there wasn't nobody could toll. They asked a boy at Lowrys store, and the blind man down by the hall, and the woman who keeps the candy shop, but they hadn't seen nothin' at all. They dragged the pond at Sawyer's mill, and they questioned this tollgate man, and all through the lot at the back of his hou&e, the Governor raced and ran. But all in vain, for wherever he looked, went, the people he sought were gone, and the only place where he didn't look, was where the light was on. And he never knew there had been a fight, until a week and a day, then he sent a constable after the men, 4.000 miles away. Long live the State of Massasip! The Governor long live he! If ever the moon should run away, lnsy he be there to tee! Should hostile powers invade his land at some far distant dav, mav he find the foe that wastes his State before it goes away. And great good medicine had it ben. for the land of the sunny south, had the Governor closed his smooth-bore eyes and looked with his long-range mouth -Burdctte in Brook' lyn Eagle. Shopping in France,. The shop strata on which ho much of f ris rests are to me very interesting. The lettered class aftect to despise the small bourgeoisie. But the shop people are as well worth studying as any in Paris. The capable, alert women of affairs, who form a life partnership with their husbands, and who do their

full fchare of the work, have good strong faces, the best I have seen here. Where the shopwoman is young, she often has a charming modesty of demeanor. But the proprietaire does not like to have bar goods handled and left. If you look without buying you may receive a sarcastic rebuke, such as an English or American shop woman would not dare to administer. This is due to the fact that she owns the concern, and is not responsible to a "boss." Of course, I am speaking of the little shops, not the great ones, like the Magasin de Louvre and the Bon Marche. A Parisian shopwoman's fingers have a wichery and magic peculiar to themselves. They can tie a bow, fit a glove, or twist a curl with- an irresistible charm; and yet the Parhiienne, in the shop or out of it, is hardly ever beautiful, nor can I see that she dresses better than the women of other nations. One cannot study the middle class Frenchwoman on her native heath the shop without perceiving how largely the material prosperity of France is in her hands. The French business woman physically is far superior to tho man of the same class. She seems to have overcome manv of the weaknesses of her sex, and to suffer little from the false shame and foolish ambition of women of her class in other countries!. She takes a pride in her own walk of life gratifying to see, and behind the ledger in the 4bureau" feels herself a little queen. Augusta Lamed, in Christian Beg" inter. Eugenie's Coolness. The first occasion on which Mme. Carette saw the Empress was at a ball given to the imperial couple in the Town Hall at Fontainebleau, in August 1858 a fete which was very nearly end

ing tragically. Tho ball-room had been installed on the upper story of the building; the guests had assembled and the Emperor and Empress had taken their places, when it was suddenly discovered that the ceiling of the room was in a dangerously dilapidated condition, and the motion of the dancers had so shaken the rickety old building that the chandeliers over the ttyroae were oscillating in the most alarming manner. The Enipross had a happy inspiration, j She quietly rose, and taking the Em- i peror's arm, proceeded at a slow pace to the supper-room, followed by tin greater part of the guests. It was then possible to warn the comparatively few that remained of the danger and request them to leave. Thus the ri.sk of a panic was averted and, although the ball came to a somewhat abrupt termination, there was no accidei t to life or limb. Lorir don Timet. Tuk Chicago papers, wh ich have been loud for buried wires, oppose tho removal of the Poles until the census shall have been taken.

SENATOR MORGANS MHA.N TEIrfL He Curt a U nmtui Tar-got That X fed to Gibe. Col. John S, Prince has discovered a bew occupation iVr the colored man a.id brother who congregates so numerously in the vicinity of the Coliseum when a race is in progress, says the Omaha Herald Ever on the alert to assist the deserving needy of any color, Col. Prince bethought him of a scheme by which he could not only ameliorate the pitiful yearning of the impecunious negro to witness the speed contest, but could at the same time provide his pat irons with cheap, innoceut, and healthful recreation. He procured a large canvas screen, painted in the center thereof a gigantic sunflower, and in the heart of the flower cut a hole large enough to admit a seven and one-half head. Then he purchased a dozen base balls of medium hardness, and was ready to put his humanitarian principles into practice. When the colored man accosts Col. Prince with a request for free admission to the show he is taken bv the arm and escorted into the building. The canvas screen is showed to him, and he ia informed that if he will stick his head through the hole and keep it there until the twelve base balls, fired at fifty feet range, are aimed at it ho can remain in the building until the lights are extinguished. If the proposition is accepted and it is seldom rejected Col. Prince summons a few lovers of markmanship and tells them to cut loose. They o bey the mandate with alacrity. One colored habitue of the speed ring loved to pose as a target because it gave him opportunity to make a little money and gibe at the wide markmanship of his white man and brother. "When there was a paucity of African applicants for the dead-head admission he cheerfully tendered his services as balldodger at the dirt-cheap price of 1 cent per shot. SenaLor Morgan spent $2.50 in the game without scoring a single bulls-eye, and was driven to frenzy by the target protruding its tongue and hurling ribald jeers at him every time he missed it. The Senator took a mean revenge. He gave the crack pitcher of an amateur base ball club $1, a dozen eggs of antique vintage and secret instructions. The twirler asked the colored man if he wanted to earn the dollar, and the colored man requested him to bet his life. The twirler fired a couple of balls so wide of the mark that the target opened its mouth to vociferous derision. Fatal indiscretion ! Pop went an egg into the cavernous facial aperture and pop went half a dozen more into the eyes, ears, and wool of the nauseated African ere he could withdraw his head from the hole. The marksman vanished. The colored man and brother was fumigated, but he no longer haunts the Coliseum. 14 Thus' sadly remarked Humantarian Prince, 9s he sprinkled the vicinity of the screen with a strong dilusion of chloride of lime, "thus is the sweet, confiding nature of Afric's children basely betrayed by those who should seek to reciprocate it m kind. And thus are all my efforts to elevate lowly humanity frustrated by the heartlessness of my race for which I blush. The Senator makes me tired." Chinese Maxims. The following selections of maxims, moral, political and philosophical, from the popular work of the Chinese, show that the people of that country are not altogether the stupid dullards which they are generally represented to be. The well pointed morals and acute observations these maxims contain not only bear testimony to the character of the Chinese mind, but forcibly exhibit that which is true and that which is good whether in morality, philosophy, or natural policy--are alike adapted to all nations and all people : The loftiest building arises from small accretions. The straightest trees are the first felled. The people are the roots of the State; if the roots are flourishing the State will endure. Life is a journey, and death a return home. It is better to suffer an injury than to commit one. Causeless anger resembles waves without wind. The wisest must in a thousand times be once mistaken ; the most foolish in a thousand times be once right. Forbearance is attended with profit. "While silent consider your own faults, and hile speaking spare those of others.. A discontented man is like a snake who would swallow an elephant. The house wherein learning abounds will rise; that iu which pleasure pre vails will fall. If men will have no care for the fu ture they will soon have sorrow for the past, Hear both sides, and all will be clear; hear but one and you will still be in the dark. Kind feeling may be paid with kind feeling, but debts must be paid in hard cash. To be fully fed and warmly clothed and to d welf at ease, without learning, is little better than a bestial state. Those abovo should not oppress those below, nor those below encroach on those above. ' The prosecute the unfortunate is like throwing stones on one fallen into a well. When paths are constantly trodden they are kept clean, but when abandoned the Aveeds choke them up; so weeds choke the mind in the absence of e in pi oy ment. The Value of a Home. A city which has the largest share of individual home owners has the smallest share of dangerous classes. A man vh? owns a home, or who is successfully trying to own a home, can never be turned into an Ishmaelite, a Bohemian or an anarchist. In struggling against the tenement house system, and iu struggling for a home, heroes are made out of common clay. No man can rent a home. Let every means which business enterprise can devise to furnish Uome'-ownir g bo encouraged. There was never an age nor a day when it was truer than row that ''There's no place like homo. n-Lev:is ton (Me.) Journal.

FABLKS. L THE KlTtf AND THE PIGEONS. A kite, knocked higher than Gild-' toy's by hunger, hovered around adoocot hoping to secure material for a pigeon pie. Failing of his object lie had recourse to strategem. He sent word to the pigeons not to experience any alarm, as he was in the neighborhood solely for their protection. The better to secure to them a free constitution, an impartial enforcement of the laws and protection against trusts, he proposed that they elect him dictator. The foolish pigeons, weary of a republican form of government and thinking that a dictator might insure genuine civil service reform, consented to his proposition. The kite, who was a lineal descendant, by the way, of the one Ben. Franiiliu employed to fetch the lightning, was established as dictator with great pomp and circumstance. But the next day he pretended that he had made a bet that he could eat thirty broiled pigeons in thirty days and h& set to work to do it. It caused, a fluttering in the dove-cot, you may be sure, but every pigeon was plucked. This tail o:: a kite carries its own moral. THE FOX AND THE WELL. A fox looking earnestly and reflectively into a well, to see if indeed truth were at the bottom of it, lost his balance as a man frequently does now who deposits his money in a bank and went to the bottom himself. Soon a wolf came along and looked into the well, when the fox importuned him to help him out. The wolf replied facetiously that he wasn't a well aweep or a windlass. 44 Go fetch a. rope," cried the fox, fire escape or something by which lean get out." Then the wolf told in a hypocritical tone of voice how sorry he was to fin him in such a plight. It showed, however, the danger of plunging too earnestly into the cold water cause in an antiprohibition district. aTa, ta," said the wolf, walking off, "all's well that ends well." Moral Let well enough alone. HERCULlfiS AND THE CARTER. A carter who had loaded his cart too heavily, having a pretty big load on himself, got stuck in the deep ruts that mark the streets of New York. He began to pray that he might be helped out, by Hercules. But Hercules told him to put his shoulder to the wheel, whip his horse and get out. The carter thereupon began beating his horse with a dray pin, for which he was arrested by an agent of the S. P. C. A., brought before a judge and fined $10 and cosiis, one-half going to the agent and the other half to the judge. Moral Let Hercules say what he may, the hoirse won't stand an overloaded dray. & Soap. Jr., in Texas Sifting s. Unfortunate Remarks. Before making me of quotations, even of Scripture, says the excellent English publication, Scraps; one ought to be careful that the idea to be conveyed is just what is intended, for sometimes, even with the best intentions, one goes astray. At a dinner given by an English nobleman an old gentleman roee to propose a toast, e Jid though his opening sentence ' was enthusiastically applauded, it was evidently not quite what he had intended it should be. fcI feel," said he, that for a plain country squire like myself to address this learned company is, indeed, to cafct pearls before swine. It was some time before he fully understood why his hearers laughed so uproariously. The man who speaks too promptly, or without attention to the relation of his statements to one another, is also liable to verbal mishaps. "Why are you so slow in answering? asked a lawyer ot a witness. "Are you afraid oi: telling an untruth?" "No!" cried the witness, answering too hastily that tim e. "I have met this man," said another lawyer, severely, as he glanced at a prisoner, "in a great many places where I should be ashamed to be seen myself. The he paused and looked with astonishment upon the smiling court and jury. An orator at a fair wound up a glowing description of what was to be seen on the grounds with the ambiguous statement, faStep in, gentlemen, step in ; Take my word foe it, you will be highly delighted when you come out A gallant foreigner once said to an English lady: "I congratulate you ou having so charming an acquaintance aft Miss W . She is young, beautiful, and intelligent." "Yes; but don't you think she is a trifle conceited?" "Perhaps so; but, madam, just put yourself in her place, and say whether you would not be conceited, too! was the startling but well-meaning reply. A gentleman was once lamenting to a friend the conduct of his son. "You should speak to him with firm ness, and remind him of his duties, said the other. 4,He pays no attention to what I say. He listens only to the advice of fools. Then, with a sudden thought, ttI wish you would talk to him. It Piiys to Be Cautions. " You kne w G eorge Waahin gton, didn't you ?' he queried in a confidential way as he hitched up to a man in a Woodward avenue car. "No, sir, I never did!w was the some what emphatic reply. "Well, you have heard of him, ot course ?" "I may have." "You don't mean to say you never did hear of him?" "I refuse to commit myself, sir, until I know your object." "Oh, that's it. Well, if a feller was hadr up and went to Washington ta borrow a dollar till Satiuday night

he-

"That's enough, sit i I now declare

that I never heard of George Washington, and his characteristics have no earthly interest to me. Good-day, sir. Detroit Free Press. Knowledge, like religion, must be experienced in Older to be truly known