Bloomington Telephone, Volume 14, Number 2, Bloomington, Monroe County, 24 May 1889 — Page 2

CtOlHG OUV AND COMING IK. Going on to bay us clothing, Going oat t&e bills to py; Coming in o very slowly, Coming in each working day ; Going out from us so easy. Coining in, so hart to win. Ceaseless stream ittls pennies Going out and oouiing io. Through the many wants of home-Ufa, From benefit a our humble cot ; To the butcher and the baker Where the meat and bread are bought. From the old and much-worn wallet, To the cruel world of greed ; Going out with sighs snd sadness, To supply each family need. Through the inmts that crowd us daily, Throagb the bills that must be met, Through the many needs of children, Where the family's growing yet ; To the busy world about us. With its heiirtleas woe and sin, Bestless stream of little pennies, Rnfthing out into the din.

Coming back so very slowly,

ear old homestead,

Though we try to toil and save :

Coming to the at

Coming in t o keep us brave :

Weary, are we very often, Weary, whea we try to win. From the world the little pennies, Which are alow in coming in. Going out to pay the taxe?. Coming in our hearts to cheer; Going out to pay for schooling. Coming in to family dear ; Ceaseless stream of little pennies. Which we find so hard to win, From the doorways of the homestead, Going out and coming in.

BEAU'S SECRET.

BY AUEX DCKF BAILIE. The "prettiest" specimen of a man I ever laid eyes on was Bean Blakely, of 44 Ours," when he joined as Second Lieutenant. We soon all loved him for his genial, kindly qualities, but every man and officer felt certain that, when it came to fighting. Beau would be found wanting. The first battle after his arrival convinced us that the dainty fellow was all man, and subsequent ones caused him to be regarded a hero. Without the excitement of a fight, he was soft spoken and gentle with all men ; with women, good women, he was "as clay in the hands of the potter." Yery wealthy he was; all that riches could purchase he might oommand, yet he had no gross and very few small vices. He enjoyed the good things of life to the utmost, but never abused them. I kpew him well, loved him from the first, and he "took to me" in a corresponding degree, by the law of oppo-

sites probably, for I was rough, ugly and battered an old "sabre" as ever sat a saddle-tree. We were on duty in Louisiana in 1861, a settlement of French Creoles was a few miles from our camp, and I soon found that Beau was spending much of his time there, or riding with the belle of that community, magnificent in her dark beauty, as was he in his fair perfection. Flora had been but a short time from the convent school in which ehe had been educated, and the flirtation was fast and dasperate. I knew my boy's principles too well to dream of his harming the girl wilfully, and young, modest and well-educated as she was, I considered her fully able to take care of herself. Beau had told me of his mother, a woman of immense force of character who had dominated over him, without resistance, all his life, as she had over his father until that quiet gentleman found rest in the grave. One day Beau, with a very serious face, asked for leave of absence. "And why?" I asked. He displayed a letter: "Here are orders from the highest authority, the mater; I am to report at once at family headquarters for special and permanent detail." 46 As how and what?" To be married!' he answered, with something like a groan. "You see, there is a girl that my mother defcerm-

inea, long ago, tn&c x snouia marry ; more money, you know. She is a good girl, like her well enough, but never said a word to her on such a subject or any matter leading to it .Now she is out," courted by ail the fortune-hunters, and my good mother insists that I must oome home &nd secure the prize before some, one else carries it off." "If yoiMlon't care for the girl, don't go," said L Don't go! don't go!" responded Beau, in astonishment. "If you knew my respected mother, even you would never think of disobeying an order from her lips or pen. There is nothing else to do, I must go." "And what will Miss Flora do or say?" I asked. He blushed; tcristed his handsome mouth. "Ah 1 it will be harder on me than her. She will quickly forget me, with all of her devoted followers about her; but I tell you, I only knew since I received this summons, how hard I was hit there, but I suppose it is all for the best. My mother could never receive the Ijttle brown French girl as her daughter, and I dmbt if Flora would marry me anyhow. " The man's lack of vanity was wonderful. Bean's leave was granted. He went to his Northern home to remain three months. For about ten days I often saw Flora flitting about the camp on her little pony. It struck me that the girl looked unhappy. Then yellow fever broke out among the inhabitants and we moved seventy miles further up the river. Five weeks from the date of his departure Beau Blakely rejoined us, the ghost of himself, worn to a shadow, with ever-troubled eyes, and aa air of self-depreciation. He was kinder and more thoughtful for others, than ever; but not even to me did he volunteer an explanation of his marked suffering, and no man could look at him and ask it ' Once I said : "My boy, is there nothing I can do?" "Thanjt yon, Chief, there is nothing any one can dx You will learn all some day.9 That he had txen married I knew, for I received the cards of invitation a week after he loft, but I knew also that no letters from a lady ever passed into his hands, coming from his home. "Trouble with a ready-made, unloved, and unloving bride," I thought, and tried not to worry over the matter. The war ended, then Beau resigned. I heard of him living alone in his grand

house, the life of a hermit, but he never wrote to me, and busy with army duties I only occasionally remembered him. In 1884 I was retired from active service and made my home in New York City. July of said year, there was forwarded to me, through the War Department, a large letter. It was from a noted law firm of a neighboring city and contained a sealed enclosure. The note said that, "their late client, Mr. Bartram Blakely, formerly of your regiment," left directions that this packet "should be placed in your hands in July of 1884, if you are alive." On the enclosure was written in Beau's fine penmanship: "Deak I). If this is not called for In three months after you reeoivo it, open, road, and act as I request. I know you will do this for me. Ever the same, to you,, "Beau." My mind had plenty of occupation in puzzling over this mystery, and the

more I puzzled the worse mixed up I

became.

Three weeks later I received another astonisher, in the shape of a card, brought to my rooms one evening. It read: AT. FELIX BLAKELY, Paris. I managed to order the visitor shown up. There entered a tall, fine-looking yorang fellow, with the "set-up" of a soldier, who spoke with a strong French accent. "Sir Colonel," he said, "I am the son of your old comradfe, Bartram Blakely. Here was anothe r knock down, Beau's son ! He had not a single feature of my blonde friend; he was dark of hair, eye, and complexion. "I have a letter from my dead father, received years ago telling me you held an important package for me. At the proper time I sailed for this country." He produced the letter. It told him of his lather's approaching death, notified

him to seek me when he reached his twenty-first birthday. Added to it was an order for me to deliver the sealed package. I was to read it after he had first mastered its contents, then to be his friend and guide. Quickly I placed the document in his hands, ushered him into my little den, left him alone and sought comfort in my pipe. It was fully an hour before he ap

peared his face was firm, but showed traces of severe emotion. He handed me the papers.

"You are to read he said; and this is what I read : August 10th, 1876. My Dear Felix or My Dear Old Friend: My failing health warns me that I must no longer neglect a duty I have heretofore been too much of a coward to discharge. Let me tell the sorrowful story with all possible brevity. In 1S&, I met, while in the army, Flora , the only woman, as I now know, that I ever loved. That she enjoyed my company I was confident, and I sought hers.

I might have asked her to become my wife in time, but before I knew how seriously my affections were engaged, I was summoned home by my mother to marry a lady whom she had selected for me. I obeved the order as I bad ever obeyed any from that so urce. When I informed Flora of my intended departure, at our last interview, I noticed that the proud girl seemed stunned for a moment, then her spirits rallied and she was more lively thau ever, jesting with me about being a wife-ruled husband. I felt a little hurt at her apparent care

lessness then, but afterwards was well pleased that she could take it so lightly, and lelt to be married to my mother s choice. I had received some photographs showing certain improvements and additions made to the family mansion. One of them I gave to Flora, and, with the curiosity of an untravelled girl, she soon learned its exact locality. Three weeks after reaching my home was the morning of my wedding. A short courtship it was, but the bride had been prepared in advance, and I was anxious to have it over. Love had nothing to do with the contract. My mother was lavish in expenditure for the event, the great house and large grounds were thronged with friends from far and near. The ceremony was completed, congratulations were received. I had the first moment to myself when my "best man" and good friend touched me. I turned and saw that his features wore a troubled look. I stepped aside with him. "Beau," he said, Tm sorry that anything should mar your pleasure. But it is best to prevent scandal. There is a girl, shut up in the did tummer-house, who was found in a faint among the trees on the lawn. When 6he was restored she talked only French, but your name she constantly repeats. The servants told me just now you had better see who she is. I excused myself, and, in wonderment, made my way to the place. There I saw Flora, the one whom I, since I left her, acknowledged in my heart as the love of my life. I had hei carried to the house. In a moment my whole nature seemed changed. Regardless of appearances, I summoned my mother and bride to a private apartment. I told them all. There was a stormy 3cene, but it is unnecessary to dwell upon that. For onc,e, and for all time after, I was firm. My wife returned to her parents and soon went to Eurcpe. My mother left my house. Muoh talk ensued, of course, but after a time, and with my departure, gossip found other food. 1 left Flora at my homo, a physician and nurses were engaged to reside there and give her every care. I returned to Louisiana to make inquiries and found that the yellow fever had almost depopulated the French settlement, that Flora, after acting strangely, had disappeared two weeks from the time I lef fc that section. Her parents died during the epidemic; all that remained to her was a brother, an infant, twelve months old, he had been taken to an asylum in New Orleans. I found the institution and the child, much money obtained me possession of him and large pay induced a French family to receive and i$ise the infant. The war closed, I could resign with honor and did so. I returned to my home. Flora was ijuiet, healthy and

happy in the belief that she was mr wife, but her disordered brain would never resume ite balance. I had one 'wing of my house especially arranged for the useof herself and her attendants. My wife quietly obtained a divorcemnd married again. My mother never forgave me; four years ago she died. It was said that I had again married, that my wife was insane. I cared not; I shut myself up with my books and led the life of a recluse. I called Flora, my wife, she was and is such in the sight of Heaven. You remember, Felix, when you were ten years of age, I took you to France, to study first, then to enter its military schools. Can you also recall that I brought you to a great house, after a long journey that there you met a lovely, quiet lady who cried over and petted you, and called you her son, and whom I told you was your sick mother? You were too young to know the truti then, now you are a man and shall learn it. That lady was your sister, aud you are Felix the infant I obtained from the asylum in New Orleans. I have loved and cared for my poor Flora all my life, made ample provisions for her after my death. To you, feeling as a father towards you, I have tried to do a father's part. You are now a man, to your care, under guidance of my old comrade, I commit my sacred charge; I leave you a large fortune, everything is in proper legal form. I have kept myself thorougly acquainted i with your life, I believe you will do your duty, will be as brother and son both to the precious being 1 entrust to your care. I cannot live long, my only regret is in leaving Flora. But we shall meet again, I and my love, as of old. God deal with you as vou do with her. and

God bless you. Bartkam Blakely. And this was Beau's secret.

A Floating-Island Wonder. Situated high up in the main Bocky Mountain divide, in the eastern part of Idaho, just south of the boundary line between that Territory and Montana, and a few miles west of the Yellowstone National Park, is Henry Lake, a beautiful sheet of crystal water, having an area of about forty square miles. The contour of the lake is oval, and the wooded banks bear a luxuriant growth

of mountain grass. On casual examin

ation there appears to be no outlet to this lake, but closer observation reveals a small creek issuing from the southwestern 3ide, which is the beginning of the north fork of that mighty artery of the Northwest, Snake river. On this lake, sometimes ou the north side and sometimes to the southward, or wherever the breezes chance to bear it, is a curious floating island. It is about 300 feet in diameter and has for its basi3 a mat of roots, so dense as to support large trees and a heavy thicket of undergrowth. Decayed vegetation adds to thickness of the mat, aud forms a mold several feet in thickness. On the edge of the floating forest, in summer time, may be seen a luxuriant growth of bluejoint grass, the roots of which form so compact a mass as to support the weight of a horse. Any number of men have no difficulty in walkintr about on it.

Farther back among the trees one might build a large house and make a garden and do whatever he pleases. He would be just as solid aud safe as though there were not 100 or 200 feet of water beneath. There is a willow thicket near the center of the island, and scattered among these willows and contiguous to them are a number of aspens and dwarf pines. These catch the breezes which float over the island and act like sails on a boat, aud move the nearly two acres of land hither and thither over the forty square miles of water. Thi3 shows whv one mav one dav ftee the island on one side and the next day on the other side of the lake. Henry Lake is exceedingly picturesque. Around it .rise snow-capped peaks, among which are some of the highest of the continent's backbone, partly covered with a verdure of forest and grass, and showing here and there formations of granite and unique basaltic columns. During the hunting season the waters swarm with wild fowl. There, are beaver, too, and plenty ol large game may be had in the adjoining mountains. The Went Shore.

"Smoker's Heart." If, as alleged, it was too much smoking which upset Mr. Edwin Booth at Rochester, it is far from being the first case of the kind in our history. Within the past twenty years the medical faculty has come to clearly comprehend, and accurately diagnose, a disease which they now denominate as "smokers heart." Excessive smoking, whether by pipe, cigar, o cigarette, affects tho action of the heart and disturbs the circulation. The pulse will intermit not with any regularity

i sometimes one beat in lour, sometimes

one in ton, sometimes two or three at a time, and then comes trouble. The brain, missing its regular pulsations of blood, wavers, the heart flutters, and then follows a temporary collapse. Strong cordials are "indicated. " Strong coffee is good strong spirits better. But the remedy, to often relied upon, is as bad as the disease; aDd the subject grows slowly wors Angina pectoris is said to sometimes result. One of the leading physicians of this city relates a case in point.' A patient suffering from "smoker's heart" believed that he had a chronic heart disease, and came for a careful examination early in the day before he had eaten any breakfast. The stethoscope showed the heart to be sound as a dot he had not smoked for twelve hours. Greatly relieved at the verdict he lighted a big black cigar, and sat smoking, while he talked. In a few minutes as be lose to go, his feet failed him, and he fell in a momentary faint. The heart was fluttering wildly, but yielded at once, and resumed its normal, action, after a strong stimulant. Tho moral of this story is that, if you smoke at all, you should smoke in mod eration, and only on a well-tilled stomach. It is recklessness that hurts. Cincinnati Enquirer. Lue is full of compensation: 13ie tongue of the deaf and dumb man ne rer gets into trouble

The Magnificent Army of the Tsar. If you wish to s.e military Russia in all its glory and opio luxury you must take your place in the first days of April on one of those tribunes which rise at the extremity of the Champs de Mars on both sides of the imperial pavilion. Society meets there to assist at the grand spring review. All the guard is massed before us 20,000 men it least, and perhaps more. Other States may pride themselves on a military force equivalent to this, but none can show a force so magnificent and picturesque in aspect. All the races and all tho arms of this varied empire are about to defile before our eyes, from those noble Chevalier Guards, who seem to have been resuscitated from the romantic Middle Ages, down to the Kirgheez of the Asiatic steppe, who are still pagans. "Attention!" Thousands of voices have transmitted the same word of command. "The Emperor!" He appears yonder at the corner of the Champ de Mars. The moment he is seen all the flags flutter, all the bands join in one formidable chorus to send heavenward tho sounds of tho national hymn, "God save tho Tsar." The Emperor arrives at a gentle gallop. Behind him follows an escort which makes many hearts beat amongst the fair public of the tribunes. It is a gathering of tho most illustrious names and the finest horsemen of the Russian nobility. All the armies of tho world have contributed to form this staff. The Hun

garian magnate rides side by side with the Japanese military attache, the French kepi salutes the fez of the Mussulman boy. The master passes along the front of his troops; the Empress follows in an open barouche. At th approach of their Majesties the band of each reg

iment resumes the hymn with wild fury a hurricane of harmony, which accompanies and envelops the imperial procession. The traditional salutations are exchanged between the Tsar and his

soldiers : "Good-day, children." "We.

are happy to do well for your Imperial Majesty." The sovereign stops before the tribune of the Grand-Duchesses; he gives ihe signal, and the march past begins. At the head are the platoons of the Asiatic escort, Eastern and wild Russia, Mussulmans from Khiva and Bokhara, Georgian princes, Tcherkesses, Persians, Mongols, and Caucasians. These primitive warriors, armed wi;h lances and steel maces, wear long coats of mail over their brilliant silk dresses, furs of great price, damascened helmets or Tartar caps. This is tho vanguard of the hordes of Attila, the concession made in the regular army to legend aud fancy. Then come the compact masses of the regular army, the infantry first of all Preobrajensky, Finland Chasseurs., and soldiers of the Paid Regiment, with their large copper hats in the form of mitres such as were worn by the Grenadiers of Frederick tho (Treat. In accordance with an old tradition, all men who have flat noses are recruited for this regiment. The lines of cavalry follow the infantry like living walls of brass and steel. Then come the light troops Red Hussars, Grenadiers, and Lancers; and finally swarms of Cossacks, galloping on their lintle ponies, sweep along from the extremity of the Champs de Mars at full speed, stop and turn short at the foot of the imperial tribune. These troops perform the exercise of the Arab fantasia lie down on their saddles, lean over the ground without quitting their stirrups, and pick up the lance or pistol tkart thev have thrown down before them. The artillery closes the march. The batteries, admirably horsed, are carried along at full speed by black chargers as fine as the finest trotters.

Ihe vicomte Eugene Melchior de Vogue, in Harper's Magazine. A Great Journalist Describes Prince Bismarck I went to the Embassy, where the Prince arrived about 11 o'clock, "What was my surprise when he informed me that Prince Bismarck asked me to dine with him next day at half past six, in morning dress. On the 2d, accordingly, at a quarter past six, Prince Hohenlohe, as had been arranged, called for me at the hotel. I was waiting at the door for him, and we went together to the Chancellor's. Next day everybody at Berlin, and very soon all Europe, knew that I had

dined with the Chancellor, and had

staid with him till toward 11 at night. It was commented on as a great event, and the French papers have often

I. twitted me with this dinner, styling me "Prince Bismarck's guest." Thes absurd attacks have never impaired the great satisfaction I feel at a recollection full of interest. I have since often opposed Prince Bismarck's policy; ho himself, through a misunderstanding, once attacked me in the Reichstag, I have blamed him for many things, and at the time I write these lines Professor Geffeken's imprisonment seems to me abominable, notwithstanding the attempt to justify it by the ill-inspired iisclosure of the indictment; yet nothing will prevent my declaring that Prince Bismarck and Pope Leo XIII. ire the only men I have f$eeu nearly all the great personages of the time who have not disappointed me, but have even surpassed my expectations. Prince Bismarck appeared to me a man beyond comparison with any, having a powerful mind, an unequalled intelligence, a clear will, a strong decision, a wonderful sagacity, a striking ray of saying things, of judging men, of foreseeing and directing events. Add to this great and scornful pride, speaking of men with cutting sarcasm, an incisive and picturesque style, an absolute confidence in his own superiority. Even his stature exceed ad my expec t ations. I had never seen him except at Madame Tuss&ud's waxworks in London, where he was represented as a short man, so that when the door opened and this giarnt in uniform entered 1 was quite takeji aback. M. De Blowite, in Harper's Magazine. Heads and Waists. The Venus de Medici's head measured around the temples 20 J inches; allow for the wavv hair half-inch and call it 20 inches. I make the waist 27 inches, but as the figure is bending slightly forward it may vary, according as the measure is applied. The neek is 13 inches. A lady friend was so kiad as to

moasuro saveral other young ladf.es for my benefit;, and I do not lined uch a marked difference. The heads ae generally larger and the waists smaller, it is true, but take one instance: Head, 211 inches; waist, 21 inches; neck 12 inches. A young girl of 16 meiisurea 131 inches head and 24 inches waist. Another lady measured just 201 ;inches head. The measures ware taken over tho waist of the tunic. One would suppose the measure wDuld be lass if taken after the ctassical manner, but by some mysterious dispensation of providence ths waist of the modern woman it acknowledged to measure more than when un trammeled. Exchange, Friendly Birds, The birds are much better friends to tha fruit grower than many a mar. gives thorn credit for. Some birds feed on the wing, and therefore, live entirely upon insects. Of such is the king bird, tli 3 pewee, One writer says thai: "the bald fact that those birds make their food of insects, and of insects inclusively, is well-nigh beyond question. But, on the other hand, it is not pretended that thoy discriminate between the beneficial and injurious species. The swallow or kingbird, chasing even an injurious in sect in the air, may be really only pur suing a creaturo already marked for death by a friendly little parasite, whose whole progeny are sacrificed by the action of a bird presumably 'beneficial to agriculture.' Still, as these birds do no direct mischief, and as they do undoubtedly eat a great many noxious insects, they may be ungrudgingly left to tho enjoyment of protection. Then the following are classified as those which take their food parfcly on tho wing and partly at rest: The yellow warbler, chielly taking its food on trees, eating a few insects on the wing, the larvss of moths t.nd the eggs of insects. The redstart, of habits very simi lar to those of the yellow warbler. The red-eyed and warbling vireos, also busy hunters for insects. The cuckoos, one of which, shot by t.:ie gentleman who makes this classification, had a stomach full of caterpillars. The blue bird is largely insectivorous. Of the woodpecker a writer gives him a different from the ciornewlut usual reputation. He says : The hairy and downy woodpeckers are culled sap-suckers, t bough there is veiy little satisfactory foundation for the idea that they injure trees by sucking the sap.. The nuthatch and yellow-bellied woodpecker are generally included in th e same category. The last named is, perhaps, injurious m that res pect. The wri t r says : 4 1 have never seen an injury done to trees from the punctures made by these birds, and the tree3 upon which they have been operating generally appear to be perfectly healthy. Fi'0:u the number of holes which thev make in the tree, I should say that if their purpose were to obtain sap the trees would die. I think

thai these classes of oirds, with perhaps tho exception of the red-headed woodpecker, are. on the whole, beneficial,"

PROBLEM OF THE SEXES

Blackbird and House -Snake. One bright morning last summer I waii walking out in the country near town, lookiag for anything I could find, and seeing what I could in the bird line, whim I was surprised, to hear a great uoise of birds chattering and crying as if tinder excitement, blended with cries of tear and distress.. On coming aearer to the noise I saw a large number of birds; there must have been at least one hundred of all kinds on and about a certain tree, those flying away were bringing more birds with them. There were sparrows, bluebirds, Baltimore orioles, robins, nuthatohets, several woodpeckers, redbiris, bluojaya, and many smaller birds, but or.ly one blackbird, a very larce one. And what

struck me as peculiar was the attitude of this blackbird. He seemed to be fighting somethin g very seriously, wkle the other birds would utter cries of encouragement and rage. I watched them for some time, wondering what it could all mean, when something cropped at my feet. Looking down I saw a koase-snake about eighteen inches long. It started up the tree and I killed it with a fctono. As soon as the snake fell ail the birds began flying a,bout as if congratulating each other on their victory, and it really seemed that their ones were changed to joyCurious to know more I climbed the tree, when the birds, instead of dying, as might be supposed, fluttered around me as if to scare me away. In a fork of the tree where tho fight had taken place I found a sparrow's nest with five young ones, which uhe snake was after. Their parents, not feeling able to copa with the enemy, had undoubtedly gonn for help. The blackbird was the champion and did all the fighting, while the other birds did all the "talking." This

seemed very strange to me. He would attack his foe fiercely until tired, then retire a few feet, and then begin again, thun fighting alone for the young of a bird of an entirely different species. I sat and wondered whether these birds had selected him a their protector, or had he taken the br.ttle upon himself? He certainly fought well. Forest and Sir tarn.

Business, Miss Cometothepoirit Ah ! Mr. Longdefer, you cannot tell what trouble a girl has who is receiving the attention of a gentleman. Mr. Longdefer Troubles? Of what nature, pray? Miss C. Oh! from the inquisitivenesfj of parents, for instance. They want to know everything. There's pa, now; he is constantly asking such questions as, "Mary, what are Mr. Longfedor's intention? What does lie call upon you so regularly for, and ssay so late when hs does call?" Mr. L. And what answer do you make, Mary? Miss C. I couldn't make arty a nswer at all, for you see you you hadn't said anything to mo, and and, oi Mr. Longfeder told Wary what to toll her father. Bos ton Courier.

"It is rumored that you have in your possession one of George Washington's teeth," Baid a gentlcivan to a reli- collector. "It is false, sir." u Which, the tooth o:r the rumor?"

Mow Boy Born thn ttlrU, hut th Ljt tes TJve th JLoncer. You ha'e'aJIboy and girl -twin?., perhaps. Which will outlive tbether? Nothing but death to loth is certain but in all probability if both pa:stha age of thirty-five your girl will live the longer. Here are some ctaious Htatiatics from the Atlanta Comsiitution: In 1884 there were 50,000,000 pe ple in this country, and about 882,000 more males than females. That was only because more nialas were born; the females live the longer. Of the centenarian , lf4.)P were men and 2,607 were women. Thfc boys start out nearly 1,000.000 ahead and are in the majority until the sixteenth y ear, when the girls are a little more numerous. Sweet sixteen is a numerous age anyhow. After that first one and :hen the other is in the majority, the girls gradually gaining after thirty-six and leaving the men far behind after seventy-five. There are some interesting facts about the old people. The native whites constitute about three-fonxths of tiie entire population, but have only one-seventh of the centenarians. The colored is only oneeighth oi? the whole population, bafc hi three-fourths of the centenarians. There seems to be a providential provision to balance this longevity of the females. In almost every State a few boys are born; not many more, but almost; always a few. It is astonishing to see where the census gives thousands and hundreds of thousands of be ys and girls under one year old, there are, with one or two exceptions, always a few hundred more. In only six of the mi fortv-nine States and Territories are more girls born, and in these States they are very slightly in excess from 11 to 80. These exceptions are Arizona, Delaware, Florida, Louisiana. Montana, and North Carolina. The facthat the females are in the majority in all the original thirteen States but Delaware and North Carolina, especially ii Massachusetts and New England, has created the impression that there is something in the climate or in r.he people that produces more women than men. This is a popular but egregious error. In Massachusetts there v ere in 1880 437 more boys than girls under one year of age. The males are in the mil ority in almost all the Eastern States, because many of the young men go West. All over the West there is an excess of men, and those who are not foreigners have been withdrawn from the States further East. In the new States and Territories this is nio.it roticeable. In Idaho, for instance, there are twice as many male&. as famales, but the male infants are only a little in excess of the females. The West is drawing heavily on Abe manhood of the East. From this all the old States have suffered. Massu-

j chusetts seems to have lost more than ) nnv Thar a are nartA nf rtDrtlwiTj Ohio

which are portions of New England removed. Massachusetts shows the loss and Ohio shows the gain. Anothet curious fact is that while all over the country more boys than girls are born, in cities and towns there are more girls Between the ages of five and seventeen, inclusive, there are 4,580 more girls than boys in New York County, 1,708 more in Kings County, 2,726 more in the city of Baltimore, 1,013 more is Suffolk County (Boston), Mass. ; 2,000 more in Cook County (Chicago), I1L: 2,131 more in the city of St Louis, 1,971 'nore in Philadelphia County, and 2,6 mere in the parish of Orleans. All these cities, excep New Orleans, are in the States where mora boys than girles are born. Self-Beheading in Breams A prominent Worcester business man passed through an experience in dreamland a few nights ago that is puizling the local psychologists, and will add in teresting data for tho society for psychological research. .He had an idea he ought to shave and proceeded to do so. Just before he began work it occurred to him that it would be the easiest, thing in the world to take oS his head, and, placing it on the table, faciliate matters. It seemed in the dream that this wa allowable for a certain number of minutes without endangering life. So he hung up his watch to count the minutes, The operation continued 'til some errand called the man across the room, and be returned to find his head wa missing. He looked at the watch and found the time was near when he musi have his head in its proper place if h card to keep it. Then he "lost hi head" in two ways, and he rushed frantically about the room, looking in every available place. Just as the nuuuttf hard was about to cross the fatal point the Worcester man woke up, felt for hii head, and was relieved to find it thtfre. Springfield RepublicWe have personallv known of a simi

lar case. A lady once dreamed that she was in the habit of taking off her head, and setting it in her lap so as to arrange her hair at convenience. When this was done she put it back. The notion of this habit formed a background for the particular dream in question, which was this : While sitting with Her head in Iipv larv on at warlr on her httir

theire was a sudden ring at the door. Shi put on her head in a hurry, ran down stairs, opened the door, found some friends, welcomed them, showed them into the parlor, and only then, on taking a chair to sit down and talk to :kem, did she discover that in her haste fthe had put on her head wrong aids before. In the midst of .the embarras merit which followed, she awoke. Weekly Star. t Grievously She eked. "Grindstone, is that the morning paper you're reading?" "Yes. It's full of that divorce case. I tell you, Kiljordan, there ought to be a law against publishing such stuff "So there ought And any man that will read it betrays a most depraved

taste, wnen you are aone witn. tne paper. Grindstone, I'll- look at it a moment n "It's simply outrageous. How au man how any man can - (becomes deeply absorbed.) . (Waiting nervmsly for about faur seconds) ' Seems to me, Grindstone it's taking you a blamed long time to read that papr. Chicago Tribun.