Bloomington Telephone, Volume 13, Number 43, Bloomington, Monroe County, 10 May 1889 — Page 3

v . 1 CBAPiI3 BATTEI.tf. -.0103. nto 3. 7wwi -who spafc I'm taught pl-o-r.-s-h Shall ba pronounced "plow," "Zat's easy vu yia know," I "Mon AngUi I U gee Ourou&x" My teacher but sat in sat case O-u-g-h is ob," And zen I Ituigh end sat to hiio, "Zees Anglaia make ino cough. He ay. "Not coo, bnt in sat word O-u-g-h is 'off" Oh, sacre blon ! si; eh varied sonnds Of words make ine hiccough I He say A pain mon f riond eea wrong ; In hiccough." Zon I pry "No more, You make my throat feel rough." Non ! non !" he ca y, "you are not right O-u-g-h is Miff I say. I try to speak your words, I can't prononz them though t" In time youll learn, but now you're wrong, O-n-g-his 'owe,'" "111 try no more. I shall go mad : 111 drown me in ze lough V But ere von drown yourself said bV -O-u-g-h is 'ock.'" He taught no more ! I held him fast I And killed him wis a rough I

STORY OF 1 MUTINY.

Bow it xvm JPut Down by the CJftpt&ixTs Fair laughter.

For two years I bad been mate of the schooner Jessie, Captain Martin, plying regularly between Sydney, New South Wales, and Hobartstown, Van Dieman's Laud. We had a trim craft, easily handled, and our crew never exceeded six men. There was no second mate and the captain stood his own watch. A year before I engaged with her she hai been captured by convicts from the penal settlement, and when recovered, after two or three days she had been supplied with an arsenal. The trip whu h gave rise to the incidents I am about to relate brought the Captain's danghter on board for the first time, she having been away to school for a couple of years. The schooner was named after her, and if a vessel could feol proud of anything then the Jessie would hare been puffed up over the good looks of the girl whose name she bore. Miss Martin was a typical English girl, and just as handsome as the best of them. She was then 19 years, old, In the best of health and spirits, and it was as good as medicine for a sick person to hear her sing and laugh. As our voyages were short and safe we had been able to keep the same crew for a long time, but on this trip we were all broken up. Two of the old men had been taken ill while we were loading, a third had mysteriously absented himself, and on the day we were to sail the cook walked ashore in a huff. Tbere was no trouble, however in tilling the four vacancies. Indeed, they were applied for as soon as vacated. The cook was a southern colored man with good recommendation, while the three sailors were Englishspeaking and of English nativity. $ When a crew is sent from a shipping office the master must not find fault with their personal appearanoe. If they

are what they claim to be, that must satisfy him, no matter if the whole lot are bov-legged, cross-eyed, bald-headed and 'humpbacked. - It is the same when the mate engages men at the wharf. If they satisfy him that they are sailors he does not find fault with their look. The three sailor men I engaged for the trip were hard-looking fellows, and I would not have trusted them not to rob met but I took them just the same. At sea they would have their stations and their orders, and the discipline cf a vessel discourages all exhibitions of impudence toward officers. . Our crew was now composed of six sailors, captain, mate, and cook, and the girl Jess brought the number cm board up to ten. It is a run of over five hundred miles almost due south from Sydney to Hobertstown, but until passing Cape Howe we had the coast in view, and knew where shelter could be had in case of a storm. Our erew went cheerfully to work, this weather favored us, and tor three days everything went as smoothly as youplease. I had two of the old men and one of the new in my watch, and on the fourth night, as we just held steerage-way during my watch, the man at the wheel, whose name was Keedham, and who had been with us several voyages, fussed around for a time, and finally said: "Mr. Loring, I'd like to speak to you about a matter. "Verry well; what is it?" "I don't like them new men, sir. Tor what reason? u They've got their heads together too often, sir, and they've talked to Bill and Tom, my old mates, until they've quite upset them." "About what T "Well, sir, about pirates, and islands, nd treasure, and such stuff. I didn't take to 'em, and they didn't take to me, and so they don't trust me. but I can't

help but think there's something wrong in the wind." I wasn't starred not even worried. Sailors are always talkingsnch nonsence among themselves, and aboard of every craft there is always a tale-bearer who wants to curry favors. Needham was distant and peculiar, as I bad heard the men say, and that was why the trip had not taken to him. I thought the matter over for some time, and then thanked the man for his information, and asked him to keep his eyes open. We had a light breeze all night, and f be next day was very mild. We got a iff breeze from noon to midnight, and on the morning of the sixth day were below the cape. Then the wind died out flat and dead, and all day long we hadn't sufficient to rufiie a feather. I had been watching the new men closely since iSeedhatu started my suspicions, but not a thing could I discover to confirm his statements. They were cheerful, prompt, and respectful, and I quite dismissed any thought of conspiracy. If Needham had heard or seen anything further, he had not reported it, although invited to do so. The Captain's trick that night was from 8 to 12 o'clock. At 9 o'clock I was asleep in my berth, the Caj tain was lounging and smoking, and Jess was in the cabin after some article of clothing. There was no wind yet, while the night was soft aod starlight. There was a nan at the wheel, but this was mere

form's sake, he having nothing to do. All of a sudden, as the Captain paced the quarter, some one in the forecastle shouted "Murder !" There was a scramble and a rush followed by a splash, and a choking voice from the water gasped out : "It's mutiny, Captain look out!" It was the voice of Needham, who had been stabbed and flung overboard. Next moment the Captain saw every other man before the mast advancing aft armed, with capstan-bar and belay -ing-f ins. The negro cook was with them, and the old man was not long in realizing that something worse than mutiny was on. Instead of ordering, or arguing, cr waiting for explanations, he leaped down into the cabin and bolted the heavy doors behind him. I heard the row, and was kw dressed, and so it came to pass that the Captain, Jess, and myself were together aft, and all made prisoners at once. "It's mutiny, Mr. Loring!" shouted the Captain as I entered the main cabin. "Arm yourself and we'll teach the rascals a lesson not to be forgotten." He had scarcely ceased speaking when a bullet struck him on the right shoulder, and a shot fired at me grazed my head. One of the mutineers had fired through the open skylight. The Captain staggered to the sofa, and in a jiffy I had the lights out. Then I pulled the heavy sash down and secured it, and we were safe for the moment, It needed no explanation to satisfy me of

what had happened. The crew had seized the schooner, and Needham had been murdered because he would not join the conspiracy. I had a revolver, audi staged for the deck, but the Captain stopped me. "C me back, Mr. Loring. You have no show! They would kill you before you get on deck !" "But we must get the schooner back !w I said. "Certainly; but we can't do it by throwing our lives away. We are safe for the present. Help me off with my coat and attend to this wound. Jess, yon take my revolver and stand in the companion-way to guard the doors."

I got at the wound as soon and carefully as I could, and was rejoiced to find that the bullet had struck the bone and glanced off. Indeed it fell out of the flesh as I washed away the blood. It was thus a painful but not a dangerous

wound. I soon had it attended to, and the Captain thought he would not be prevented from handling a revolver. I had just got him fixed up when some one rapped at the doors, and a voice exclaimed: "Below, there! I want a word with you!" "What is it?" demanded the Captain. "The schooner is ours, ai you, of course, know. We don't want your lives. You can have a boat and start off as soon as you please." "Bat we don't propose to go!" "Don't get cantankerous, old man. We've got the schooner, and we know enough to keep it. We don't want you here. If you accent our offer, all right. If you want to fight it out, then look out for yourselves!" "That's what we propose to do," replied the Captain, and then all was quiet 1 crept to the head of the companion stairs and heard the mutineers conversing in low tones, and while I sought to catch what they said, &. man ran aft to the wheel and the others began to make sail. ' The calm was broken. I knew the course they would make without seeking a sight r? the cabin compass. They would head to the west, probably for King Island, and while between the south coast of Australia and the north coast of Van Dieman's Land, a stretch over two hundred miles, there would be no fear of meeting with any craft larger than a coaster, owing to the numerous shoals and shallows. The breeze came up lively, and the schooner went dancing away as lively as if all had been at peace. "They won't try to get at us for a time, and perhaps not until morning." said the Captain, "and we must make ready." We first made a barricade at the door of the main cabin, using the sofa, table and chairs. Then we got out and loaded five muskets, placed three cutlasses hanciy, and in addition, each had a revolver. We worked in the dark, but we knew where everything was to be found. You might have looked for the girl to break down, but there was never a sign of it. Indeed, she expressed a hope that the men would not give in too soon, and peeraed to desire an attack. When we had done all we could we sat down and waited for the night to pass away. The schooner reeled off the miles at a lively pace for the next four hours, and morning came without our having been disturbed. Then sail was shortened, the craft laid to, and, as soon as the men had had a bite to eat, the leader summoned us with: "Below, there!" "Well?" answered the Captein. "We will give you another chance to leave. You can have a boat, oars, sail, water, and grub, and no one shall hinder your going." "Suppose we refuse to go?" "Then your blood be upon your own head ! Bather than surrender the schooner, we'll burn her and you with her ! I'll give you half an hour to think it over." We didn't want two minutes. We were determined not only not to l&ave the schooner. but to recapture her. We expected to be attacked first by the skylight, but this was a small affair, and did not command but a portion of the cabin. And, as we afterwards ascertained, the only firearm among the mutineers was a double-barreled pistol, which had already been discharged, and could not be reloaded for want of ammunition. They would also batter in the doors at the companion, but we hoped to hold them at the barricade. They could not come at us by the way of the hold, for that was full. We got a bite to eat from the pantry, had a gloss of wine, and by that time were hailed for our answer. The Captain replied that he would not go, and defied them to do their worst. We heard them moving slowly about, and at her own request Jess was allowed to pull away a portion of the barricade and creep up the stairs to listen, while the Captain and I stood with our guns

ready to repulie any attack by the sky light. Jess wai returning to report, when a battering ram drove in the doors hardly an arm's length away, and the raqa who had wielded the suar raised a yell at the sight of her. Not one person in ten thousand, man or woman, would hove done as she did. Instead of sprinffing over the barricade, she leveled he:. revolver and shot one of the men, the leader of the mrdiuY,

! through the hoad as he stood above her.

As lie threw u; his arms and fell she shouted to us to come up, rushed up the stairs and Ave heard her tire twice more before we got over the barricade. When we get on deck no one but Jess was to be seen erect. Two dead men and one wounded unto death were lying on the deck, and the other three had fled to the fo'costle. Two minutes later they wero begging for their lives, and they crawl.ed like curs as they came up to be bound. Jess had killed two of the new men and mortally wounded the negro cook, and the mutiny had been put dow.i and the craft retaken before you cou d count a hundred. Her movements had been so swift and her aim was so fortunate that everything had to go before her. It would have made your hair stand up to listen to the confessions of those rascals. The seizure of the schooner had long been contemplated, and apart of the plan wi to get hold of the girl. Had wo accepted the offer of the boat we would liavo been killed as soon as we reached the deck. The leader was an ex-convict named Ike Reese, and he proposed to turn the craft into a regular pirate, strengthening his crew from such small craft as he might overhaul. The negro died within an hour, and we hove the three bodies overboard without ceremony. During the forenoon we worked the schooner to the east, and about noon got a couple of hands from an English merchantman and put into Melbourne to report and deliver up our prisoners. One was hanged for the crime, but one died before the trial and the other escaped and was shot dead by the officers in pursuit A Hunter's Valuable Prize. SoffieiJiisliLke the excitement over alleged discovories-of gold in Lower California is attending similar news from the Transvaal, in South Africa; The diggings there are reported to be enormously rich, and a swarm of pros

pectors is flocking to the field. As revealing a hitherto unsuspected vein of imagination and lightsome humor on the part of the Boers, the current story of the discovery of the gold field is interesting. It was first published in the Transvaal Advertiser. A well-known resident of the Republic, it is said, while out hunting one morning saw a koodoo bull, which he tried to stalk. Alter he had slightly wounded the animal, and while he was riding after it down a stony declivity, his horse btumbled, he was thrown, and his rule was broken. At this the koodoo turned and attacked the man, knocking him down and attempting to kneel on him. By holding the animals forelegs the man kept t'he buck upright, but the animal's horns had evidently entered the bank for some distance and its head was held down close upon; . the man breast. The animal seemed as anxious as the man to get the horns loose, but was evidently helpless, the horns bein ? held fast in the ground. Held tlius um.ble to move, man and beast remainet. in the broiling sun all that 'day. At nightfall jackals and wolves came prowling about, and even brushed again t the man and -sprang upon the buck But the velln of the man and the kicks of the buck kept them away until dawn, when thev slunk awav, Soon after day

light a rifle shot was heard ami a bullet slightly wounded the, man in the forehead. By waving his handkerchief and shouting he prevented further tiring, and the huntei who had at first seen only the buck, came up and learned the real situation. Wishing to take the animal aflive, he hurried off to the nearest farm and brought men with ropes and bhovels, who bound the buck and extricated the man. But when the horns were at ..ast freed there was found upon each a miss of metal, which, being removed, proved to be nuggets of gold weighing respective!' eight und six and

'one-half pouutl. This led to the dis

covery of a rich gold field. Any one doubting the entire accuracy of this story can mako further inquiries at the office oi the Transvaal Advertiser. Mistaken Kindness The father who, for a great portion of his life has struggled with poverty, i3 unwilling that his children should have a similar experience. So he denies himself indulgence in even necessary things that he may save and make for bis family. The mother, remembering how irksome household tasks were to her in her girlhood, permits her daughters to lead lives of domestic ease and indolence, thinking that in so doing she makes the host manifestation in her power of maternal love. Ay a natural consequence o: tnis view on the part of parents, we sea growing up all around us young men and women perfectly useless for all the practical purposes of life unable to cope with misfortune. Intellectual or moral fibre is not inherent; it must be built up from within, find is

the result of independent thought and action. The ? ooner a bov tan be made to wait upon himself, to think for himself, to act for himself, the sooner will the germs of true manhood begin to develop within him. It is no kindness to surround him with such attention and care that he will not bo compelled to learn the lessons of self-reliance, of patient industry, of persistant hope. The real crow;as of this world are crowns of labor. Dow a on Saccharine. A committee of doctors in Paris having reported t fiat saccharine the new sweetening product produced from coal tftr is noxiou to health, and it appearing that its importation into Prance would interfere with the best sugar industry and the revenue of the government, the French Chamber has introduced a bill "i; provide a remedy for the evil, in tbs interest of the customs receipts and t iat of the health of the consumer," by "prohibiting the importation of saccharine and saccbarinod substances. " lixahange.

THE AECH OF AUBELIU& 1 NobT Roman Moi-u.aent Hidden Among tho Squalid Hcvols of Tripoli. It is characteristic of Tripoli that the nost remarkable monument in the vhole town one might almost ouy in ;he entire province should be so hidden away amid a litter of squalid and msightly hovels that a careless observer ' night easily let it pass unnoticed. In- : leed, more than on student of Mr, 1 Murray's red-bonnd Koran has left Tripoli under tho impression that the , 'Arch of Aurelius" exists no lo:igar, saving doubtless expected to seo mjiiiuJ;hing like the Arc de Triomple at Pnris, or the Brandenberger Thor at j Derlin, or the ''Gate of Tiberius" at ' A.ncona. But the wonder is actually therefor 11 that. Picking your way along one ! f the narrow streets that lead up from ;he harbor, you are struck with an :iude- : In able something in the aspect of a j ihapeless block of masonry on your i right, which impresses you Builieiontly

;o make you halt and take another and l closer look at it. This second glance reveals to you, in the midst of the rough stones and rubble with which Turkish barbarism has tilled in and blurred its nagniticent outline, the grand sweep of l noble classic arch, which, with its ai&ssive blocks and its smooth symmetrical masonry, asserts itself unmistakably through all the unsightly chaos ireund it. And there on its side, distinct in every line as when it came from ;he carver's hand 1,725 years ago, the mr of Roman conquest, whirled along by the mythical she-wolf with which Rome's history commences, is seen rushing like a hurricane over the necks )f prostrate nations. It is naturally somewhat of a shock :o vou to discover that the interior of

i ;his splendid monument of the classic j age, erected in honor of one of the greatest rulers of ancient Rome, is now ! used as a store house for casks of Hour ind potatoes. But all thought of this j profanation is quickly losi in the con

templation oc the grand old relic itself. Seventeen centuries of storm and battle have failed to di&lodge one block from its walls or to shake down one stone of its roof. When it first rose above the Mauritian palm trees Christian martyrs -Were being thrown to the lions in the newly-built Coliseum at Rome, and painted savages were hunting wolves Dver the future sight of London. Since that time the Roman Ehipire has vanished from the earth, and the savage 14 Brittani" who were Virgil's chosen type of lowest barbarism, rule twice as many lands as the proudest Caesars, while a new world of which the boldest classic navip;aior never dreamed, lias arisen to spread its renown over the whole. But although the very sight of Aurelius's palace is now unknown and Aurelius himself is but a dim historical phantom, this tstrange old monument of his greatness still stands here Hke a tombstone of Rome's departed glory, the same yesterday, to-day, and forever. -David Ker, in New York Times. Impeachment Ashley, Who has not read or heard of ,4 Impeachment Ashley," the Wild Rover of the Maumee, who presented iu the House of Representatives the impeachment resolutions against Andrew Johnson and led the fiery, untamed partisan spirits against the then President of the United States. He cut a great figure in those days, but was chiefly noted for his fine figure, his long, curly black hair, his resonant voice and obtrusive manner. He passed out of Congress before the animosities of the war were settled, and received no great credit from his party for his fight against Johnson. During the Hayes administration he was made Governor of Da

kota, while the brainy Frank Hurd, from Toledo, represented his old constituency on the floor of Congress. Mr. Ashley has changed wonderfully since those days. He has grown fat and flabby, biit he still carries Lhe same merry face, which looks like a full moon in repose; but the long black, curly hair has grown gray, and age is leaving its mark upon him. "No, I am not in politics any more," said the veteran to a New York Star reporter the other day. "It's a turbulent sort of life at the best. I enjoyed the hurly-burly of Congress when I was tbere during the days in which there were great questions up for discussion and great men to debate them. But in this negative era Congressmen must have little to do, and become lonesome. I am devoting my Jirao to some railroad enterprises ill which I have an interest, and spend most of it in New York. I am contented with the change from a political to a business life, and I shall probably not dabblci in public life any more." Not Born to Be Killed. Jeremiah McCarty, the foreman of the laborers on the equipment building at the Navy Yard, which was partly destroyed by fire a year ago, i3 probably destined to die a natural death. It is evident that he cannot be killed by ac cident. for he has had more than one narrow escape, tae most remarkable of these at the Torpedo Station, Newport, fifteen years age. He was assisting in the experiments with a new explosive, and took out a torpedo to place near a buoy ftbout two miles from the shore. The torpedo contained some seventeen pounds of explosive, and when he reached the place where it was to be put overboard ho lifted it up, and as he did so some one on shore touched the electric button, and the next thing seeu of Jerry was when he was about ten feet in the air enveloped in smoke. He was taken ashore seemingly in a dying condition, but, recovered after a time with the loss of an eye and part of his right eide. New York Tribune. She Was Apprehensive. "Ya-as," said Dr. Caddington to Miss Coolfax, "in a iew years I expect to travel extensively." "That will be nice." "Ya-as. It has alwavs been mv am

bition to go about from place to place ;

and not bo both&hed with any considerations of business or making a living or anything of that sort." 41 My gracious!" exclaimed the young lady in dismayed tones, "Yon surely do not propose lo turn tramp, do you, Mr, Caddington ?" Merchant Traveler.

Canine Friendship. The following stiorv of friendship be

tween two dogs, from the London Spectator, may be of interest: Some time ago I used cf ten to stay with a friend in Wiltshire, whose park is separated from the house by a lake, which is about one hundred and fifty yards broad at the narrowest pa:rt. Being extremely fond of animals, I soon became intimate with two delightful dogs belonging to my aostets, a lars;e collie called Jasper and a rough skye-temer, Sandie. The pair were devoted friends, if possible went out together and, sad to relate, even poached together. One afternoon I called them, iw$ usual, to go for a walk, and making ruy way to the lake I determined to row across and wander about in the deer park. Without thinking of my two companions I got into the boat and pushed off. Jasper at once jumped into the water and gayly followed the boat; half-way across he and I were both startled by despairing howls, and stopping to look back we saw poor little Sandie running up and down the bank and bitterly bewailing the cruelty of his so-called friends in leaving him behind. Hardening my heart, I sat in silence and simply watched. Jasper, was clearly dejrejised; he swam around the boat, and, looking up into my face, said unmistakably with his wise brown eyes: "Why don't you go to the rescue?" Seeing, however, that I showed nc signs of intelligence, ha made up his mind to settle the ditficultv himself, so turned and swam back to forlorn little Sandie. The re was a moment's pause, I suppose for explanations, and then, to my surprise and . amusement, Jasper stood still, half out and half in the water, and Sand ie scrambled on his back, his paws resting on Jasper's neck, who swam across the lake and landed him safelv in the deer park. I need not describe the evident pride of the one oi the gratitude oi the other. How a Boy Was Hcftirmed. A few years &o, savs a gentleman, I

was sitting in a large dry goods store in

Chi-ago, waiting for a friend. It was storming a little outside, ai.d the clerks were not very buy. Not far from mo stood a cash-bov, with his back against a pile of prints, and his elbow carelessly resting on the same. I noticed his handsome face, set with dark hair and eyes, so expissive, his cheeks bespeaking perfect health. A lady at an opposite counter, while paying a bill, let fall some fractional currency, such as was then in circulation ; that fluttered and fell to thi3 floor, and was picked up by the gentlemanly clerk in attendance, except one, a 25-cent piece, which noiselessly skiramed along and fell near the cash-l)oy I have alluded to. Without changing his position, he set one foot upon the money, and sjemed unconscious of everything except the skylight, and stood gazing up into the open space while search was made for -the money. I watched him with a sickening thought in my mind, "What will be his end?" I went swiftly to him and whispered iu his ear: "Boy, will you sell your soul for a paultry 25 cents ? Don't you know well that the money is under your foot? Restore it, and never, never do such a thing again." The boy timed pale, stooped and pi cked up the money. "Sir," he gasped, "don't tell on rue, I pray I beg and I will never do so any more. Think of mv mother." I presume he thought I know him. I did not then, but afterward L found out who he was; and from the fact that he stayed with hk. employer several years and was raised to a high position, I think the offense was never repeated. Boy, the first theft is the longest step you take toward prison; tho first glass takes you nearer to a drunkard's grave than all you nay swallow after; often the first oath clinches the habit of profanity, A stained soul is hard to purify. There are virtues you can lose, but once lost they are gone forever. The Skull of a Cobra The skull of a cobra lies before me. From the tip of the snout to the back of the skull th e 1 en gth is an inch and a quarter, but from the tip of the snout to where the lower jaw is hinged the length is more than an inch and three-quarters. The brain, cose is an ivory casket of great solidity, but the jaw bones are loosely connected, and during life are capable of a good deal of motion. The two side pieces of the lower jaw are in the snake, only united in front by elastic tissue. Behind they do not hinge on the brain case itself, but on long supporting ones which jut out at the bad: of the skull, and these are capable of motion outward, so as to widen the space between them. Not only are there teeth on the lower jaw and along the out edge 3 of the upper jaw in the python's skul, there are also

extra rows of teeth implanted in the bones which lie one on each side of the palate. The teeth are not for crushing, or tearing, or chewing. They also slope markedly backward and are for holding the prey. Your finger will slip into the mouth of a small python easily enough ; but try and draw it out again, that is a different matter. The cur red teeth are constructed to prevent that, Murray's Magazine. Take Cure of the Pence. When Budge was at college, ha offended against one of the wise provisions laid down for the guidance of undergraduates by the powers that be, and was fined five shillings by the proctor. Chuckling in his sleeve the gay humourist invested in some small change, and proudly had down a pile of one hundred and twenty half-pence upon the table of his oppressor. "Thank you, Mr. Budge," replied the tyrant, with a smile; but I won't be hard upon yon; I will not take all your savings at onae. You' will be good enough to bring me one of these coins every day fcr the remainder of the term' Budge went out and wept bitterly. London Fick M$ Up. Boardb-r Mrs. Hardcash, how long was this egg boiled ? Landlady I don't know what's the matter with that egg. You are the third boarder who has kickod about it so f iu this morn Lug,

GEBUiS JOKE.

A RECONSIDERATION. Sho If vou attemot to kiss me 131 pall mamma. He All right call her! I'd rather kiss two than one. "Then I guess I won't call her. A HOPEFUL SIGN. Mother That young man peemed to be very affable lust night. Did he proxse before he left? Daughter No, he didn't proposo exactly, but he blew rings f tobacco smoke, so he must have been thinking oi engagement rings, or something oi! that sort. BOSTOX MODESTY. Smith The most modest lady in th world lives in Boston. Jones What makes you thinks flhi is the most modest lady in the world? "I just guess so. In her library sha has one bookcase for the works of mala authors, and a separate one for f emalo anthers. A PROMISING YOUTH. Teacher Do yon know the difference between right and wrong? Boy Naw "If you were to take your littla brother's cake from him what would yon do?" "Eat it up." STEERING NECESAEY. A. A dirigible balloon has been invented at last, B. Is that a balloon that can be steered?

"Yes.

n

"Bah ! What a waste of time. IVhy don't somebody invent a wife or a mother-in-law that can be steered? STREET ETIQUETTE. Teacher How is a young lady to act when she is alono on the street? Rosebud She must look around every once in a while to see if any handsoma young man is following her. HE HAD HAD EXPERIENCE. Jeweler You say you want some u .tme engraved on this ring? Young Man Yes, I want the words r "George to his dearest Alice" engraved on the inside of the ring. "Is the young lady your sister?" No, she's the young lady to whom I am engaged." "Well, if I were you I would not hate George to his dearest Alice engraved o:a the ring. If Alice goes back on yoxk you can't use the ring again." "What would you suggest?" "I would suggest that the words be: 'George to his first and only love.' You see with tha inscription you can use the ring half a dozen tirs.es. I havekfcd experience in such matters. " Texas &iftings. Russiju Prisojw. The Odessa covre: 'Wudent learns from an authoritative source thai; a recent official inspection of Russian prisons has revealed a sad state of overcrowding- , Statistics are not easily obtainable in Russia, but the jails there themselves bear sufficient evidence of general increase of crime. In one prison in the Caucauss thoe are or were a few weeks ago no fewer than 300 prisoners huddled together in a building constructed for the accommodation of only eighty convicts. The attendant evils, morai as well as physical, are terrible. Surely it might be possible to make the jail deliveries of those unfortunate prisoners destined to transportation to Siberia or Sagbalien more frequent. One chief and lamentable cause of the annual increase of convections is the widespread drunkenness

which now obtains in the village communes, and is demoralizing and impoverishing the peasantry. The Government does nothing to check th3 growing public evil. On the contrary, where some of the communal .authorities have arbitrarily but wisely closed every drinking house in the commune, strangers have obtained licenses from the provincial authorities, and have )eopened the taverns. Theite licenses haye been avowedly granted fbr the reason that the revenue would seriotudy suffer were euch optional powers left to the best guardians of the community. And yet we were told that the Russian commune is a self-governing body. It 13 nothing of the sort. As it is autonomy exists only in name, and soon it will have lost tho last vestige of the autonomous powers with which the Emancipation act of Alexander IL invested it. Loa d Pabnerston's Early Days, Some of hi, earliest years were spent in Italy. He was then sent to Harrow. A letter quoted by his biographer, written when he was about thirteen years old, shows "how much of the man was in the boy." A youth, whose English was far from perfect, admiring a beautiful passage in Homer, keeping up his Italian in s.s English school, feeling a greater interest in Latin literature from his recollection of the spots to which it frequently refers, voluntarily learning Spanish, stating that he had not made up his nind about wedlock, but that he regretted Italian oranges and Bolojrna sausages ripened naturally into a nan who would turn his attention to foreign affairs, adnured the classic oratory of Canning, speak a good deal without compromising himself, have a good appetite, and be generally at once what is 6 charming and so rare gay and thoughtful, manly and refined." Lord Palmerston at Harrow was reckoned the best-tenqered and most plucky boy in the school, as well as a young man of great promise. To his juniors he was merciful and. indulgent, but would stand up undaunted to a much bigger adversary than himself. In these traits the "boy was father to the man.rt Our Own Country. t A Rogue Exposed , Wlnkel (at a reception) That English lord is an impostor. He is not even an Englishman. He's an American. Minkel Eh? How did you find that out? Winkel I offered to call for kim with my carriage to-morrow, and take l im a li t tie arou nd the suburbs M ain Texas, California, etc. ; and instead of accepting the offer, he laughed.-New York IVeeUy. Lots of people are inconsistent enough to expect mules to have iiorw sense.