Bloomington Telephone, Volume 8, Number 24, Bloomington, Monroe County, 11 October 1884 — Page 3

Bloumington Telephone BLOQMINGTON. INDIANA. WALTER a BRADFUTE, - - Pdbushdl

Thb inhabitants of Berlin have been so pestered with piano playing that they hare petitioned the Government to interdict practicing except from 1 till noon in the mornings and from 8 till 11 in the evening. Ths baggage masters of the country, at their recent convention, passed a resolution expressing their wish that all baggage might be marked with the owner's name and residence, in order that it might the more easily and surely restored in case it got astray. A man had seemingly been converted at a gospel meeting at Nacogdoche, Texas, announced his intention in a card to the local paper, and appended the following: My friends in future will do me the favor by not asking me to drink, as I honestly cannot take a drink without making a beast of myself." A Reading, Pa., woman went to her husbands funeral and wept as profusely as the best of them. On her way home from the cemetery, and before she had her eyes dried, she was arrested and taken to jail on the charge of having poisoned her husband with arsenic She is probably mad now because she wasted so many tears on the old man whbn she needs them all for herself. Theris is a curious series of trees on the farm of Mr. P.MaYiner, near Penn Yan, New York. The original tree, an elm, was blown down over thirty years ago. The trunk, which remains, is fifty 'eight feet long, and from this trunk a row of twenty six young trees have sprung, many of which are fully fifty feet high. The young trees seem like eranches from the old trunk, but thqy are well-grown, perfect trees. A western Congressman lately at Saratoga inquired for a spring which he could drink from all day, "like one," he said, "we've got out our way. You can eat a hearty dinner, and then drink a glass of water from that spring in our state and feel so hungry that you can eat another dinner right oft" As there is no such a spring at Saratoga, he left soon, not caring, probably, to pay $5 per day and eat but one dimmer each day. The Queen 6t England for herself alone receives every year from the English Government over $3,000,000 for lifer The Prince of Wales draws every year $600,000 from the English treasury. The Princess of Wales, for pin money, $50,000; the Duke of Edinburgh, $100,000; Princess Louise, Marchioness of Lorne, $80,000; Prince Arthur $132,500, and Prince Leopold about the same sum. Then comes the Duchess of Cambridge, $30,000; the Princess of Teck, $30,000; the Duke of Cambridge, $100,000, and any number of others. "Gate has written a screed on the gratitude of American daughters. He charges them with deceit and says they leave their homes in a night to marry the man of their choice without giving their parents the slightest intimation of their intentio&s. "GathV daughter, a pretty girl of 18, has just ' done something of the sort. While traveling she suddenly took a notion to marry a Mr. Bonaventure, and old gentleman who is on very friendly terms with her father. As it is really a good ma$ch, and saved Gath" the hurly-burly and expense of a swell wedding, he is not kicking to any great extent Mb. John F. Swift, an American, who has recently traveled over India, writes: I found that the average pay of a farm laborer was five rupees a month, or, at the present depreciated value of silver, about $2, Out of this sum the laborer supports hiimmlf and family. If wheat growing becomes general the Caucasian races can ill afford to compete in a market with a product that is so cheaply raised The possible area of wheat cultivation is immense. In considering the possible product from this great wheat territory, the fact must be borne in mind that the soil is very rich, and that at least two crops can be raised on it every year. By the death of Mr, Anthony, Mr. Edmunds becomes the oldest member of the Senate in continuous service, having served uninterruptedly from April 5, 1866, or something over eighteen years. The senior Senator in total length of service is, however, John Sherman, who succeeded Salmon P. Chase March 29, 1861, and has been a Senator ever since with the exception of the four years of Hayes9 Administration, during which hp was Secretary of the Treasury. This makes his total Senatorial servioe about nineteen years and a hall The total length of Mr. Anthony's Senatorial service from March 4, 1859, until his death, is twenty-five years and a half. Much has been written about the incompetence of persons who return crop reports. But the champion crop reporter has boon found in Canada. He is a station agent at a junction of two roads in a fine agricultural district His report was as follows: "I do not

know anything about crops here. I havn't been outside the station yard, nor had an opportunity of conversation with a farmer for nearly two years. There is a field of peas opposite the station that might have been a fair av

erage crop had it not been that they were mostly stolen when green by train hands and excursionists. My own potato crop is suffering dreadfully for want of rain, and will not be over half an average crop. My corn looks sickly for want of rain, and beans will not be over a fifth of a crop," Miss Alcott explains that in a recent letter which she wrote she did not intend to cast any slur upon women who work for their living in Washington. "Whatever I may have written to some girl" she says, "who was evidently unfit for public office cf any kind, I desire to have it plainly understood (if I am to be quoted at all) that I most sincerely believe in the propriety of any woman filling any office, from the presidential chair to the washtub, if she is fitted for it, and capable of wisely and faithfully discharging the duties laid upon her. Having been a worker all my life, and tried nearly every employment for women, I am the last person to put the obstacle of even a misunderstood word in the hard path of my sisters. I quite agree in what you kindly wrote me, and hope more offices will be filled with honest, faithful, wellpaid women." Passing conditions have developed in London a somewhat ghastly literary taste, and the favorite reading there is found in certain records of Herodotus, Baccaccio, and De Foe. All about the plagues of Athens, Florence, and London is read with a morbid interest It looks as though history will repeat itself in more respects than one should the emergency which many predict arrive. They are talking of camping out in case of epidemic, and of late the white tents have thickened by the Thame's side, and are to be seen dotted all around suburban London, especially in and about Epping Forest. This, of course, recalls the plight of the merry company who prepared themselves for the worst by narrating the Decameron, and brings to mind also the colony who fixed themselves in the East London woodland when the cockney was dying at the rate of 20,000 per day. The Current: While the farmers of the Mississippi Valley are bending every energy to get the waters of February and March into the Gulf of Mexico, should they not take into consideration a possibility that the very fertility of their whole region depends upon the present average humidity of the atmosphere and soil ? Suppose the Mississippi Valley above Helena, Ark., were tiled so well that, in March, the river at Yazoo would be fire hundred miles wide instead of sixty. The watei would run off the farms of the North ir a short time; but would not the char acter of the country undergo a very sac change? Long drought are even no common in the great valley, and it if the present stores of moisture onlj which keep the soil rich and produc tive. Unless our agriculturists desire an Egypt in Mississippi and Louisiana at the expense of the northern valley unless they wish to demonstrate thr persistence of cactus and bunch-grass they surely should hegin a plan o tiling which contemplates not simpl; the damage but the control of the water-supply that great, bounty o Heaven which is now visited upon ? truly fortunate region, the garden o the world. The farmer in August anr September needs the wafers of the previous spring-thaw. How does he ex pect to get them if they be in the Guli of Mexico and the wind blowing steadily from Arizona? He should, there fore, first of all, move in the direction of and economy of this liquid wealth. Where the surface of the country invites it, the formation of a pond on each farm would seem to be the simplest and quickest way of protecting the land. Where there is a dead level, the inventive genius of the country will come to the rescue. Tho road authorities can well afford to buy land for the reservoirs which would be needed to hold the drainage of the road not the entire supply, but such reservoirs as would last through the summer. We cannot have a rich soil and a dry country at the same time, and whenever a farmer can convert a swamp or a lowlying field into a lake at the expense of the Gulf of Mexico and to the relief of "flood sufferers," he builds for a future generation, which will rise up and bless him. a Lieut. Greelys inborn pluck is illustrated in the following anecdote related by a comrade in the army : "When a little boy not more than 10 years old, Greely visited an uncle on his farm in Vermont. One day the uncle 'had occasion to use the grindstone, which may be found in every New England door-yard, and jocosely offered the boy five cents if he would turn the handle for two hours. The offer was accepted, and the little fellow began to turn. In less than half an hour the prespiration poured from him in streams. Fifteen minutes more elapsed, and the tears began to mingle with the 'sweat of his brow but he still turned away manfully. Then the uncle told him to stop, that he had turned enough and could have the five cento without more work. But the boy declined to stop, and worked away, although crying with fatigue. He stuck to the grindstone until the two hours elapsed, and was laid up for some days afterward."

RTCtt STAMPEDE A PASKENttER

TRAIN.

It is probable that no more exciting scene has been witnessed, barring a run on a bank, than the one on a Northwestern train between Milwaukee and Chicago. The train took on, at Lake Bluff, a large number of people returning home from camp meeting in session there, and every Beat was full, four deep, of preachers, deacons, old Indies, Sunday School teachers, giggling girls and children, destined for ail the stations between Lake Bluff and Chicago. The conductor was going through the forward car, taking up the half rate return tickets, when something struck him on the back of the neck that felt like a sabre, and he made use of a word that cause the hair of a deacon from Highland Park to turn gray. The conductor looked at the front door, and it was full of bees. It appears that a tree had been cut down near the track, which contained a swarm of wild honey bees, and the bees had settled on the bank beside the track to rest, and when the engine came along and the engineer squirted steam and hot water amonst the bees they got mad and all that were not killed came into the cars to see if such things could be and not overcome them like a sunimer squash. The conductor, though bitten in a vital part, on his neck, held his position, knowing that he would have fun enough with the passengers to make up for his injuries. A middle aged Sunday School teacher of the female persuasion, who was holding a big scholar on her lap, suddenly jumped up and said she was stabbed, and asked the conductor to protect her, and she looked around quite saucy at a traveling man in the seat back of her who had an umbrella. The conductor said he guessed she wasn't stabbed, but she began to yell, and while he was trying to sooth her a preacher from Evanston reared up and said something about hades, and began crawling over the back of the seat in front of him, where a deacon from Lake Forest was explaining a passage in the Bible to a young woman from liodger's Park. The deacon and the young woman were mad, and just then they felt stings from the bees, and they jumped out into the aisle and accused the minister of being a mean, horrid thing. A quartette, two girls and two boys, in a couple of seats that were facing each other, were singing a hymn, when a bee struck the soprano in front of the neck, and it broke her voice all up, and she yelled murder and grabbed the coattail of a colored porter who was going through the car on a gallop with a bee on his trouser s leg. The tenor and bass singer thought he had done somethiqg wrong to the soprano, and were going to whip him, when the alto got, a bite and yelled for the police, and a Sunday School superintendent in a seat opposite thought the tenor had insulted the alto, and he took the tenor by the neck. Just then a bee struck the tenor, and he thought it was the superintendent who had hit him, and he was just getting ready to wallop him when the conductor told them to be quiet or he would have to put them off, and then he explained that the train had run over a swarm of bees, and they had got in the car. That settled it. Every person that had not been stung didn't want to be, and they all pulled their feet off the floor and tucked them up under the seats, and there was yelling in all the languages know to camp meetings. The windows were open to let the bees out, and more bees came in, and it was a pandemonium for ten miles. The bees seemed to run to female arms that were covered with thin lace, or that were bare, and silk stockings presented no barrier at all against the busy little bees. A girl would suddenly turn pale, hold her breath a minute, and then scream. One girl climbed up the water cooler as quick as a cat would climb a tree if a dog were after it, and when the conductor came along she grabbed him around the neck and asked him to save her. He untangled her and sat her down on the coal box, and told her he was a very saving man, but he couldn't save a whole train load of girls at once, as he was no bee keeper. A Chicago minister put his foot up on the stove and began to roll up his pants legs to catch a bee, and the women all screamed again, and the conductor told him he would have to take a berth in a sleeper if he was going to disrobe. He rolled his pants down and left the bee there, but every little while he would take hold of his pants with his thumb and finger and hold them away from his leg and shake his foot and leg like a Scotchman dancing the Highland fling. When the train stopped at the first station the passengers all got out on the platform and kicked bees out of their pants, as the case may be, the conductor and brakeman drove the bees out of the cars and the passengers got in again, but every little while somebody would jump up about eight feet, and then begin to hunt in the plush cushion for something. Everybody got stung mere or less, and several ministers and deacons looked, when the train reached Chicago, as though they had been trying to knock out Sullivan in four rounds, Peck's Sun.

Dogs by Express. "There goes John Abel, baggage master. He took three dogs over to Philadelphia with him once, and found them anything but pleasant company. There were two big bloodhounds belonging to an 'Uncle Tom company that had been showing here, and the other was a large Newfoundland. Both of the 'Uncle Torn' dogs began to show bad blooi toward the Newfoundland shortly after the train started, and soon worked themselves into a fierce frenzy threatening every moment to break their fastemgs. "Able was a prisoner, unable to escape from the car while it was in motion, as the dogs were fastened at both loors. He could just keep out of their each so long act their chains held. It t dosen't need any diagram to explain tow far from pleasant it was to stand toldingon to the side of a car goiug orty miles an hour, and just ont of each of three crazy dogs, their fastenigs liable to break at any moment, .'he train was an express, and a long iiile between stops, and I believe Ja'k as held in this position for poiaething ake an hour. When it did finally

'. W iV .i V

check up he didn't lose much time Ir jumping out of the side door, making his way to the coaches, and bringing the owner of the bloodhounds to the baggage car, who shortened then ropes, and revealed to the badlj scared baggagemasher that each of the dogs wore a thin wire mask so tin as to be almosc invisible, and yet strong enough to prevent them from biting He explained that they always wort these in the play, in order to insure Eliza against being torn to pieces. Pittsburgh Dispatch. Catch ins: a Tartar. Several years ago I had a very curious experience on the Niagara Kivei which will bear telling. I was one day trolling for mnscal longe just below tho foot of Navj Island, which is not more than a mile and a half nbove the first rough watei of the terrible rapids, and less thn 8 mile above the line, which cannot be crossed without imminent danger of being carried over the falls. I was alone in a light skiff, doing my own rowing, and holding a heavy trolling line, tc which was affixed a large treble-hooked spoon, between my teeth. I had already taken twojfine mnscallonge of fifteen and nineteen pounds respectively, and was pulling diagonal ly across the stream, and heading toward Buckhorn Island, when sudden h the line was jerked from my teeth with such violence as very nearly to unseat me. Knowing that in my then position my hooks could not have struck bottom, or come in contact with any immovable object, and never for a moment suspecting the true state of the case, I supposed that I must, at length, after many years of trying, have hooked the monstrous grandfather of all muscallonge, which was reported by old fishermen as having been the monarch of the waters for the last decade or two, and as having often been seen, but never struck, although scores ol raids had been, at various times, organized especially with a view to his capture. With this idea in my mind, I picked up the slack of my line, which was now running rapidly from the boat, and attempted, with a loving and gentle, but firm pull, to draw tho great unknown toward me. To my surprise, the thing didn't come worth a cent, nor did it feel at all like an honest, Christian muscallonge, nor like anything else which 1 had ever handled with a trolling line. I ought to heve guessed at once what was up, but being more than usually stupid that day, I did not. I realized now that I had not caught something, but that something had caught me and was actually towing my boat across the stream, while at the same time the current was bearing the whole concern quickly toward the rapids. The moment for decisive measures had evidently come, so I resumed my oara, headed the boat obliquely up stream, and attempted to regain my lost ground. I could not recover an inch, and indeed, it was only by strenubns exertions that I could hold my own against the thing which, whatever it might be, was plainly too much for me. I was sorely puzzled, and began to feel a little superstitious. Surely I had not run foul of sonic huge fresh water kraken, devil-fish, or other mysterious monster! I knew, or thought I knew, that there was not a river fish in existence, which, having once taken those hooks in its mouth, could not be held by that line, and towed, head on, by the power of those spruce oars. Even yet the truth did not come, and I strained and pulled for a good fifteen minutes all in vain. Then I glanced at the land marks on the shore and found that I was slowly floating down stream and toward the main channel on the Canadian side. Then I changed my tactics, and turning the skiff about I essayed to lead my prize( ?) down into the mouth of Chippewa Creek, from whence I had myeelf emerged a few hours before. Once safely within that calm haven, speedy help could be obtained to dispatch the thing, even if it proved to be a whale. I knew that it could not break, either the hooks, or the line, as that particular tackle would lift a dead weight of more than a hundred pounds. For a little while, my plan seemed likely to succeed ; for, aided by the swift current in mid-channel, I could tow the brute toward my objective point, in spite of its furious struggles, which fairly shook the boat; that is, I could tow it down stream, but not one inch could I make shorewards. I was now almost abreast of the creek, and could not descend much farther without danger, so I determined to have a look at the monster, even if I could not secure him. I therefore shipped my sculls, crawled cautiously back to the stern of the boat, and pulled hard and steadily upon the line. This, of course brought me directly over the thing and I was ultimately able to bring it within about ten feet of the surface when, the water being perfectly transparent, I saw that it was a:a enormous sturgeon, fully six feet long, and that the hooks were caught in its belly in the center of its body ! This was a solution of the mystery with a vengunca Now, if I had had a heavy spear, or any kind of firearms in the boat with me, I should doubtless have been able to kill my troublesome customer, but I only had an ordinary gaff, and, situated as I then was, with the roar of the great falls in my ears, I .actually durst not use this, as I should have been capsized almost to a certainty, and such a catastrophe in this part of the river, meant death. Very reluctantly, therefore, I was obliged, after playing with the powerful fish a minute or two, to cut my line and let him, or myself, go I have never heard of anyone else having such an experience as this in the Niagara Uiver, although it is rather strange, that such does not occur frequontly, as sturgeons are very plentiful in the stream, and at some seasons, may be seen leaping from the water three or four at a time. American Field. On an average, only six out of sixteen of the children of the United States ar at school every day m the educational year. Four of the remaining ten go occasionally. Six prow up in ignorance. This state of things must be improved, or three-eights of th next generation will be blockheads or criminals, CurrmL

SUGGESTIONS OF VALUE.

A variation in the ordinary custard cake is to add the meat of hickory nuts to the boiling custard. Maderia nut meats are also used, and are a pleasing addition. Curtains should be hung so as to bo readily taken down and shaken, Fci instance, where a cornice is used it is well to attach small rings to the fabric, and let the rings rest upon hooks, or run over a small rod placed out of sight behind the cornice. Ookn fritters, or "oysters," as some humbug-loving cooks call them, ara now in season. To six ears of grated corn add one well-beaten egg, a little salt, and a tablespoonful of sweet milk, with enough water to make a stiff batter. Drop in hot lard and fry a delicate brown. To polish ebony, give the wood two coats of fine copel varnish and rub down smooth with pumice stone, put on a third coat of the same and rub down with rotten stone; clean and put on a flowing coat of copal varnish, -and when this is quite dry, polish with chamois skin. Nothing is better for a late supper than a glass of good milk. It is readily assimilated, rich in nourishment, and calls for no hard digestive work. Singularly enough, those who cannot ordinarily touch milk, because of its billions tendency, often find it perfectly harmless when taken at bed time. The Taxtile Record gives a formula for a solution by which cloth can be made water-proof, if immersed in it and then thoroughly dried. It is composed of gelatine five parts, soap five, alum seven, and water 175 parts. It is said that this causes the fibers to repel drops of water as do feathers. Dr. Footer's Health Monthly. Dry lima beans, which are now so common an article of food, do not require more than three hours soaking; if you let them lie in the water longer than that, they seem toloese their flavor and are too mealy. They should cook slowly, and if they should simmer for an hour and a half, it would not be too long. No vegetable is more improved by careful cooking. An excellent rule for making nut candy is to take two pints of maple sugar, half a pint of water, or enough to" dissolve the sugar and no mora Let this boil until it becomes brittle when a little is "tried" in cold water. Butter some plates or tins, cover with nut meats and pour the candy over them. Hickory nuts or butternuts are nicer for this than almonds or peanuts. Take a cigar box, remove the lid; get an old barrel hoop, made of bark and saw off four pieces each four inches long. Lay two of them together to form the letter X and fasten on each end of the box with small sharp pointed nails. Glue around the sides of the box other pieces of the hoop of irregular lengths. Glue little odds and ends of the bark on the box to cover up vacant places. Paint brown and when dry varnish. Fill with rich soil and plant with vines send a foliage plant Sand in the Sugar. "What do you call that?" asked Mrs. Small, rushing into the store of her grocer on Washington street and passing him an unwashed coffee cup, containing nearly half a gill of brownish paste. The trader put on his glasses and looked at the contends for a moment, and then gave the cup back. "Well," said he, "I am not much of a judge, but from what I know of such things I should say it w as a sweetened mixture of strong coffee and fine sand." "And do you know where the sand came from?" asked she. "It probably came in the sugar. n "And do you know, Mr. Bullbutter, resumed she, With meaning voice, "do you know where I bought that sugar ?w "I think it's like you got it of me; I sell sugar." "O, you own up about it, do you? You confess to selling sand to a poor, lone woman and making her believe it is sugar, doyou ? Now, Mr. Bullbutter," and here here voice became very ominous, "I would just like to know wrhat you would do about it if you had caught a man playing such a trick on you!" "That depends a great deal upon the circumstances, Mrs. Small. It would, in fact, depend entirely upon whether I wanted any sand or not. "What do you think I ought to do about it I who have been deceived so basely?" "Pardon me, Mrs. Small, but as you have asked me a fair question I will give you an honest answer. The last time I called at your house to collect that old bill I noticed that your knives and forks were looking a little rusty, and if I were you I would save up all the sand I found in my coffee cups and give my cutlery a good scouring. The cost would be nothing and the improvement would more than pay for the extra elbow grease; besides that you are a " "Brute ! " ejaculated she, bouncing out of the store and leaving him with a childlike smile playing on hia face, Boston Globe. Improving the Fiddle. A discovery has been made resulting in a patent that may dissipate tho existing craze for fiddles of ancient and rare design. The inventor thus explains his method: "My invention consists in mounting upon the inner face of the backs of the instrument a thin, plain metal plate raised slightly above the back on supports, which connect it only with the back. The plate is made about the shape of the back of the instrument, but somewhat less in size, so as to leave a clear space around the edge. The sound post passes through an opening in the plate, which it does not touch." Bemenyi recently tried an ordinary instrument reinforced in this way, ariVl declared that the inventor had made a discovery that will eventually "obliterate all fiddles. Cincinnati Enquirer. "Iff a civil word or two will render a man happy," said ft French king, "he must be a wretch indeed who will not give them to him. Such a disposition is like lighting another man's candle -;( m which loses none of its i v other gaics."

The Indiana d?iiremlv.

BLOOM INGTON,

DTD

College Year begins September 6th. Tuition Free. Both sexes admitted on equal conditions For catalogue and other (3ina,tion Address, W. W. Spanglee, LemSml Moss. Secretary, President. R. W, MIEKS, J. H LOUDEN LOUDEN fc MIERS, Mtomes at Law, XOOMINGTOK, INDIANA.

Office over National Bank

W. P. Rogers, Jos. R Henlsx. Rogers & Henley ATTORX1ES AT XAW. Bloomington, - - Ind. Collections and settlement of estates are made specialties. Office

North east side of Square, in Mayori building. nv5t . ) W. Friedly, Harpion H. Friedly..

FRIEDLY & FRIEDLY, , ATTORNEY AT LAW, , Offiec over the Bee Hivo" Store Bloomington, Indiana ; , Hen ry L Bates, BOOT AND SHOE MAKER Bloomixgton, . Ind. Special attention given to soleingand patching. C. R. Worrall, Attorney at Law & NOTARY PUBdlC. Bloomington, ----- Jnd. Office: West Side over McCallas ORCHARD HOUSE S. M. ORCHARD, Proprietot The traveling public willfind firstclass accommodations, a splendid Sample room, and a Good table. Opposite depot. Board furnished by the day or week t28

NATIONAL HOUSE East of the Square. LEROY SANDERS, Proprietor. BLOOM I2TGTQ2T, TJfD. ttffi This Hotel has just been remodeled, and is convenient in every respect, Rates reasonable, 6-1 C, Vanzandt, Undertakers DEALERS IN Metallic Burial Caskets, and Cases ii r P tt J "i

VAinns, etc; xieatse uuu vnriwgai furnished to order,

Shop on College Avenue, north

nid W O. Fee's Building. n!3 Bloomington, Indiana. RESIDENT DENTST

LrJ. W. GRAIN

Office over McCaJ Ca's Store oomington, Ind. All work War

anted.

17ft

W. J .Men,

DEALER IN

HARDWARE, Stoves, Tinware, Doors, Sash, Agricultural Implements. Agent for Buckeye Binders, Reapers, and Mowers. Also manufacturer of Van Slykes Patent Evaporator. South Side the Square. BLOOMINGTON, IND.

THE BEST AND CHEAPEST

WATCH EE PARING GO TO JOHN SMITH.

This work is made specialt

by him and much care ia taken thai all work is satisfactory done.

f