Bloomington Courier, Volume 9, Number 26, Bloomington, Monroe County, 28 April 1883 — Page 3

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Mbmbsrs of a new Western temperance

society, instituted by an eloquent Boman Catholic priest of Milwaukee and called the League of the Cross, do not conmrifc themselves to total abstinence, but swear not to enter any place where alcoholic drinks are sold for consumption on the premises. - The French Government is making most laudable efforts to improve the breed of horses in the country. It has just voted a law that no stallion will be allowed to cover mares which is not provided with a certificate, and to be renewed every year, setting forth the absence of certain diseases. An infringement of this 'law entails a fine of 50 to 500 francs, on the owner of the stallion, the man in charge, or the farmer who allows his mares to oe covered. .

"We clip the following from the Indian

apolis Journal, it being exceptionally appropos just now: There is a movement among Boston educators to introduce a morality department into the public schools. Emerson s ''Conduct of Life" is suggested, a test book for beginners. From "Behaviar" the child can go on to "Culture," then to "Power, then "Beauty," which will be a winter's work. This, says the Advertiser Folemnly, cught to strengthen the power of thought,increase the extent of use whatever that may mean the grace of msnners,and "lighten the faces with the true beauty of expression." Just so. If a "Western barbarian can be allowed a suggestion on so exalted a theme, it might be well, in view of Tewksbury and other developments of Massachusetts culture, to give a preliminary course of the ten commandments and the golden rule. . . .

Tobacco is precious on the Island of Eteetlan. The men there smoke, the women chew. The latter carry a little bag in which they save quids until absolutely tasteless. "The same system of economy induces the men to mix finely chopped shavings of ood and bark with their smoking tobacco, and their pipes are the smallest known. Even then they fill the bowl with reindeer hair before putting in the tobacco, and when lighted they continue to inhale the smoke without breathing until the tobacco is exhausted. In the meantime the face and neck swell, the veins are distended, the eyes shed tears, and when human nature can stand it no longer they burst into a violent fit of coughing and spitting which lasts for several minutes. It is of no use speaking to a man from the moment the light is applied to the tobacco until the coughing spell is over7

THE PUBLIC PRESS. .

Excerpts from the Newspapers on the Various Topics of Interes t. KATHEK FAMTLIAB. Gate's New York Special. Tom Hendricks is in town. "FAIB PnATjFOn IKEIAXI. Nw York Times. The American people believe in fair play. This is what they demand for Ireland. But no people not wholly depraved ever looks upon secret assassination as fan play,1 AFT2R THE IKON WOKKS, WHAT? Philadelphia Times. Since the star-route trial began the Bible has had a long rest from attack. When Mr. iagersoll gets through assaulting the government the turn of the Bible will come again. It can stand it. STANDARD DOLLARS. New York Times. The mints go on coining standard silver dollars under the law which Congress failed to repeal or modify, but the eoins roll back into the government vaults. Tie people will not have them. BTJXXIXGDBY. National Republican. The Ohio river is a beautiful stream that rises near the Pittsburg Commercial Gazette, runs past the Cincinrati Commercial Gazette, and gees on to Louisville where the Commercial is waiting for a gazette. EXTEBMINATIOX ADVOCATED. Danville, III.. Commercial. No Apache has ever been known to be possessed of any civility, decency or regard for the rights or life of others until he was dead, and the Apache tribe will never become civilized until it has been exterminated. Just why this band of murderers and thieves should be borne with longer it is difficult to conceive. WOMEN TO THE FROST. Cleveland Leader. The civil-service law opens the govern ment clerkships to competition, and welleducated women should not be backward is presenting themselves for examination whenever and wherever they have an opportunity. Thev have the law. in their fevor, aud it will be their ownfault if they do not take advantage of it. ko sexsation. 5'ashinstoc. Kej ubii can . A nice, poiiteoid man, who came into court to see and hear the star-route trial yesterday, took his right sho.5 off and put ifcdown by his ha t There was no sensation as was thecaee once in a Kentucky court, when the judge ordered a suspen

sion ... me argument until the Sheriff

colli'- open a window, remarking, "Some one Las drew a boot:" EtfPOBTING PAUPERS. C!iica;T Tribune. The? action of the British government in ifrioorrim' its nanpers to become charge upon the people of this country is a wanton .out rage. It would be so If our la -s were silent on the subject, but done in

the face of our express declarations that

it shall not be done, it is an affront and

an injury that the whole country will bit

terly resent. EXTRAVAGANT 3XPENDITUIIES. Union City Eagle.

The greater the rate of taxation, the

greater wm m tiio burden upon the mo-

dactive interests of a community, and whenever the burden wipes out ororsis

the business ninst be abandoned,and each

oranchof busujeas thus abandoned onlv

increases the burden upon the remainder, until all are destroyed, and bankruptcy will then reign supreme. It is time to call a halt ia ail useless and extravagant expenses. AJf INBUSTniOCS PCBniO SERVANT. Louisville Commercial. The sparrow is an industrious and useful public servant. If he makes himself a bit of a nuisance occasionally ,which we doubt, he does no more than some of the featheriees public servants do, and yet we must have public servants. We hold that the maiigners of the sparrow are ill-informed and mischievous citizens, with a sneaking partiality for caterpillars or in wicked alliance with the smiU boy. WM, (pflOSABnr) get there m Washington Critic. L It is pretty safe to say that Indiana will

draw two of the Presidential candidates m 1884 if she iigiires at all in Presidential timber. It will be an absolute necesity. If the party nominating its candidate first selects a heid from Indiana the other party will follow suit for self-protection, Ohio,ii is believed by many of the leading ststesnifn, will not get anvthiug from either party. New York and Indiana, holding the balance of power, will name the men. THE IOWA AMENDMENT. St . Loaif Globe-Dem ocrat . It is understood in Iowa that the Supreme Court will stick to its decision that the prohibitory amendment is invalid, on account of informalities in its submission. In that event the letter will be allowed to kill again, though the spirit makes alive. The people adopted the amendment knowing just what it signified, and its final overthrow on a mere technicality will be the result of that kind of legal vision

which discerns a fly on a barn-door, but does not see the door. AGITATORS.

Richmond Palladium.

The question of how far a government

is permitted to protect political refugees in its borders, who are plotting against the peace of another end f riendly government, is being examined with much care by the lawyers of this country and Great Britain. It is with the view of ascertaining the duty of the American government in regard to the dynamite conspirators who are supposed to be sending agents and money to England to destroy the lives and property of the people of that country. It is not a new question,though it is one not yet settled. Some years ago Dr.Woolsey said,in speaking of the rights of political refugees: '-They may not, consistently with the obligations of friendship between States, be allowed to plot against the person or the sovereign, or against the institutions of their native country. Such acts are crimes, for the punishment of which the laws of the land ought to provide, but do not require that the accused be remanded for trial to his native country." WASHINGTON NOTES, President Arthur and party have arrived at Washington, in excellent health, from their southern trip. No worn and mutilated currency can be redeemed by the treasury department until a new appropriation is made. Indictments have been returned by the Washington Grand Jury against Kellogg and Brady, for star route manipulations Charges against naval officers of wholesale smuggling are again indulged in in the Treasury Department and other circles. The assertion is openly made that the government has lost more money through the smuggling ot naval officers than through all sources combined,where at naval officers are highly indignant. The secretary of the agricultural department of California, in a private telegram says: From the latest and best information received, the State will produce a full average crop of wheat this year, or 30,000,000 bushels. Reports received from thirty counties of Wisconsin report the winter wheat in excellent condition. Of the 260,000 Indians in the United States, about 160,000 in the West, Northwest and Southwest require more or less military surveillance. One-fourth of them or 50,000 in round numbers are adults capable of bearing arms, but there are seldom more than from 100 to 1,000 Indians on the war-path. Yet we have on the border a force of 17,500 men for purposes of repression and suppression. Congressman Guenther, of Wisconsin, who was active in his efforts to secure a reduction of the tariff on glass bottles, says that even now, before the new tariff has gone, into operation, t ne price on small bottles has been increase! about one dollar per gross, and it is expected that when the new tariff goes into effect the price will be still more increased, the old rate was 35 per cent, ad valorem, and the new tariff owing to the extraordinary action of the Conference Committee, fixes the rate at one per cent per pound, an increase of over one hundred percent. It i3 reported to the Treasury Department that smuggling is being extensively pracfeisei on the Rip Grande river, and that a d'fferenceof opinion exists bet ween the district attornev for the Southern

District of Texas and the collector of customs at Brownsville as to the authority of the officers of the latter to arrest per

sons detected in the act of smuggling.

The question has beau referred to the so

licitor of the Treasury for an opinion.

The solicitor says that he has no doubt that the officers have the same legal right to arrest offenders that thev have to seize

smuggled goods, provided the arrest is not made on Mexican territory.

R H. Milroy, of Yokama Indian Agen

cy, W. T., writes to the Commissioner of

Indian Affairs that the recent trouble between the Indians of his agency and the

white settlers of the vicinity arose from a quarrel occasioned by the scattering of poisoned meat near the camp of the Indians on the Columbia river by one of the white settlers. The Indians are complaining that when the grass grew about the meit the horses might eat of it an! be poisoned. The agent says the Indians ought to be brought to the reservation, as it is becoming very difficult for them to find subsistence where they are in camp, and as long as they remain there troubles of a greater or less magnitude will be constantly arising.

The specifications for the new postal

notes, authorized- by Congress its last session, are nearly completed andby the

first of the nonth the Post office Depart

ment wiu invite proposals for making it . -

tnem irom private oanK-note companies

and the bureau of Engraving and Print

ing iocatea here. .Engravers are now at work on the latter, preparing designs, and

the specifications are alone required to

expedite matters. These notes will prove a great accommodatinn in the transaction

of business involving small amounts, ranging from 10 cents up to $2 or $3,

They can be sent for a S-cenfc postage stamp, and are made payable to bearer so that the troublesome m ney order and letter of identification are thus dispensed with. The postal note, however, will not in any way antagonize the money orders, for a sort of fractional currency. Upon the reception of a postal note all that will be required of the holder will be to present it at the nearest post office and receive the cash. A Double Pig. May Gold Democrat. Dr. W. P. McKeel, of Wingo, has a natural (or rather unnatural) curiousity in the shape of a double pig. It has eight legs, four ears (two on top of the head and two caudal appendages, but has only one mouth. It ia now preserved in alcohol.

EBB AND FLOW. Life throbs with tides that ebb and flow, With tluiifia that come, and things that go. The mists that viae when morn is f air, That riee and float, thou melt in air, Are not more transient 171 their stay Than are the hours that fcprrl nwuy, For often life seems liko a dream -So qmck'y flash with glances and gleam, A thousand things that come and go. And cause the tides to ebb and flow. A sad sweet strain that's borne along By breath of wind; a bit of snow, A few fond words when dear friends meet; The mnsic of laugh tlmt'fl sweet; The sympathy that prompts a sign; A winsome face that pusses by; Brief joys, that stay their littlo while, A kindly glance, n loving smile. These over come, and ever go, And like tho tides they ebb and flow. A lovely landscape, fair and bright, One moment eeen, fhon lost to sight The gorgeons clouds at. set of sun That crown the day when it is done Tho frosty pictures on tio pane That fade, and come, and fade again; The curling smoke that flonts away; A snow wreath on a winter's day; All these like wares that ebb and flow. With ceaseless throb still come and go. New York Tribune.

DEATH IN THE PIT.

Amy Glover was the prettiest lass in the village, and lovedl her,but,ns for that all the young chaps in the village wero of the same mind, bnt she never looked at one more than another. One day there was no work in the pit for my gang, and so I made up my mind that I would go and have it out with Amy. I set out with a bravo enough heart, bnt just as I reached the cottage, who should come ont but Amy herself, looking prettier than ever; but appearing so suddenly she dashed my spirit, and I hadn't a word to say to her. "Why, Charley, what is the matter?" she cried, m a frightened sort of way. "Well, it is just this," I said. And there I came to' a full stop. "Is anything wrong with Jack?" sle asked, eagerly. "Jack." "Yes; he is down in the pit, and they say it is foul, which makes mother and me uneasy. You've not heard anything?" 1 No," I answered, steadier now that I could comfort her. "He is all right. Yon mnsn't mind what the old women say, or you'll he looking for a blow-up every day in the year, when there is nothing more than common. I haven't come about Jack; it is about myself." She looked at me; then her cheeks Hushed, and she turned away. "I want t- tell you how I love you : I can't say all I want to, but here I am, and I wouldn't change, for a king if you will take me as I am." "Ah, you don't know how you pain me," she answered. "Don't say that, Amy; but if ynu have pity in your heart show it to me, and I'll cherish you to the day of my death." "It is no use. I can never marry a pit man. I gave the proxnis to mother and Jack over the graves of my father and three brothers, all killed at one time." She looked at me through a mist of tears, and I turned and left her without another word. I felt as if the sun would never shine for me any more; I thought I might as well be in my grave as to fry and live there Why shouldn't I go to Yorkshire

or Derbyshire, or even to the diggings in

Australia, for that matter? The notion

of it gave me a little spirit. It turned my thoughtSjiind I stepped out more briskly, going straight home. I hadn't ranch to

settle there, only to bid goodbye to the

people I lived with, and I soon came out,

pack oh back, and began my tramp.

I was walking on, when suddenly the

air rang with a crash which shook the

ground. I knew what it signified; such sounds denote bnt one result in the Block Country ; and, throwing off my pack, I

darted off to the pit.

It didn't seem a minute before 1 came

to the dust heaps around the pit's mouth

but some were there before me, and peo pie were rushing from the village in a stream. Tho smell from the pit almost threw me down as I came up, and I had to get my breath a little when three or

four of u 1 crept on to the mouth and looked down. The explosion had destroyed the cage, but it hadn't injured the signal rope; hence a 1 eans of communication remained for any one immediately below. As soon as I saw this I proceeded to rig a cross bar, and presently had it

ready.

"Juat lower me quietly; I may pick up

one or two, if there's any near," I said to

two banksmen.

"You can't go down yet," said the view

er. "How many are there m the mt?

"Half an hour ago there were fifty; but

I'm thankful to say they ail came up but ten," replied the time-keeper.

"And they are lost,for there will be another explosion presently, said the viewer. "FJ1 go down, anyhow," I said doggedly; "and if nobody will lower me I will jump down." A geod many were on the heaps, now, and two or three called out, "Good-bye, God bless you, dear led' Th - bank? men lowered me down,and I sank through the the pit's mouth. A Davy-lamp was tied round my waist, and I held a rope in my hand, so that I might signal to be . oisted up, if the air became foul. But I had no mte tion of going back until I had searched the pit and seen if there were any alive. One thing, I didn't care about my life; and another, I would have been ashamed to face the folks above without doing something, so I felt impatient thet they lowered me at such a snail's pace, and I kept looking up and down to meas

ure the distance yet to be traversed. But

my progress whs noticed by tho increas

ing density of the air which began to af

fect my breathing; and so as I went on I

had to shift my face from side to side to

make a little current. At last my feet

touched ground

I looked around as I jumped off the

straddle, and saw tho furnace was ont,

which put a stop to the ventilation of the

mine, and no air but by the shaft. The stench was overpowering, and from this and tho silence I guessed the worst. It was evident that the explosion had killed the horses, fov.no sound came from the stables, which were close to the shaft; and what hope could there he for human beings m a distant part of tho pit? I did not stand, to make these reflections; I was working forward as they went through my mind. I knew the old pit blindfold, but what with the gloom and my shortness of breath,! was some minutes scrambling to the incline. When I reached the first gallery I pushed open the trap and went on a few steps, but my lamp was 'afire' an.d J knew the atmosphere was

so much gunpowder. As! stumbled along it came into my head what Amy had said about Jack being in the pit I rushed for

ward like mad: my foot struck something

and I bent over what appeared to bo a

corpse, and the gleam of my lamp fell up

on its face. It was Jack. I caught him

in mv nrmR.nnd wi 1 thesucngtn or a gi

ant and the speed of a deer-hardly conscious, hardly breathing I made a dash

for the shaft. It was easier work going back, when you wore in the main or horse road, and I found that Jack was breathing when I reached the shaft The discovery kept all my senses at work without my Beaming fo notice it. I only felt that there would he another explosion. I placed Jack on the straddle an d tied him hand and foot; then pulled the signal rope,and as the people above hauled the tackle, I hung on by my arms. It wasn't till wj had reached twenty fee'- up that I felt fthe strain of standing on nothing; bnt from that moment it became terrible. My hards "seemed ready to snap and my head spun round in an agony. I watched the month of the pit until my eyes swam, and I thought I must drop before I reached the top. Then they began fo hoist faster; I could see the walls of the shaft; I could' feel the purer air; I heard voices; and presently strong arms caught me, and I was landed on the bank. Thev had Jack off the straddle before you could look round,and he was carried away, while they raised my head and poured a little brandy into my mouth, I called out for the viewer. "What is it, Charley Bat ecu ?fthe asked bending over me. "Everybody away from the moth of the pit, sir," I 'said. "You are right; it will come in a minnte or two' he ausweied. They got me to the top of the bank, when I heard a scream, and Ihere was Amy trying to throw herself on her brother, but kept back by the other Women. She never glanced at me. I wished then that I had staid in the pit, or let myself drop from the bar as I came up, and so escaped seeing her agmn. "But I made up my mind that I had looked on her for the last time. I told my helpers that I could walk now; and when they let go my arms I turned toward the moor intending to pick up nip pack and drag on to the next village. But I could no more walk live miles than I could fly. When I came to my pack I sank clown by it and felt that I must give up. I was so beat that though the second explosion at tho pit shook the ground under me, I didn't lift my head. All I thought of was lying quiet BT degrees I recovered a little strength, and my thoughts took me to my old lodging, where I decided to rest before I set cut on my wanderings. The day passed, and the night, and the next day, and I was still in bed, and the good folks of the house attending me like a child. My limbs, which had been racked with pain, now felt easy, and I was ready for a start again. But I thought there would be opposition, so I got up very quiet and was putting on my thing', when the door' opened, and in came Jack Glover. "Killoa, Charley, here we are, 'he cried, seizing ray hand an 1 grr ng it a hearty squeeze. "Who would have thought of us two being alive to-day ?' "Well, Jack, I am glad for you, but I

shouldn't have cared for myself."

"How's that?" "I have something on my mind." "You!" he said, laughing, and giving

me a little push. "Here, sit down and

have a pipe, and it will all go oii like the

smoke."

"I don't care if I never smoke a pipe

again," I said savagely.

"Xow, Til tell yon what it. is; you've

been having a tiff with onr Amy."

"I haven't." "Well, you know best about that, but

you were seen talking with her, and she

had a crying fit directly after. And when

she heard from me that it was you who brought me up from the pit, she fell fainting into my arms,"

"Didn't she know that until you told

her?" I asked.

"No." "Then I'll just tell you all about her

and me," I sai L

I was a long time telling it, but Jack

sat up as if he wore lietenin to a play or a sermon at chapel. I told him of the

feeling Anv had raised in my heart; told

him how I had watched tor her, thought of her, dreamed of her; and, finally, recounted our latest colloquy. Jack never moved a muscle, and not. till I stooped

for breath did he put in a word.

"Don't you thiuk y .m have been a little fast, old boy?" he then said. " How do you mean?" "Why, in giving up so. Suppose when Amy said she couldn't have you, you had put your arm around her waist and said she must?"; The view had never struck me, and rather took me aback, "But there was her promise to you and her mother never to marrv a pitman." "Bo there was, but did you never hear that promises wore made to be broken?" "I can't say but I have," I muttered, clapping on my hat. ' Where are you going?" "You wait here a minute' With that I took two stndes down the stairs into the road into Mrs. Glover's cottage. I stood outside a minute, then I opened the door, and the first thing I saw v. as Amy sitting by her mother look

ing like a ghost. only ghosts never look pretty. She gave me "one look, then started up and sprang into my arms. My heart was eo full I couldn't speak at first but I thought I must do something, so I slipped my arm around her waist as Jack had recommended. Now I felt sure of her, and o? all the happiress the world could give, and as my breast swelled proudly I began to bear a little malice. "Ah, Amy, if you had only loved me," I said. She tightened her firms around my neck.

"How happy we might have been," I continued. "Then we can be, Charley," she said. "How? We can never marry, yon know." The little fingers' unlocked, and I felt Amy falling away, but I remembered Jack's counsel and held. :a by her waist. "There's your promise to your mother and Jack; how are we to get over that?" I continued.

' "I forgot that," faltered Amy, as white

as a sheet. , "And what do yon gay to it, mother?" I cried to the old lady.

Mrs. Glover got up and took Amy's

hand and put it in mine

"That's what I say to it," she said heartily, "and Jack is of the ssn:e mind." "And this is what I gay to it," I cried,

giving the girl a kiss. You won't be surprised to hear that we were married the next week. And now I am the'Hewer of the colliery; and as for Amy the will tell you that, though she has married a pitman, and has her ups and downs like ot her people, there is no happier woman in the kingdom. The Invention of Matches. Springfu'ld Republican, "Did I over tell you what Charles Sum ner once said to me about the manufacture of matches?" queried Lucius C. Allin, the veteran armory foreman. "It was about fifty years ago now, when I was in doubt whether it would pay to go into the business, and. asked Mr. Sumner what he thought about it. He turned

around quick as a flash and eaid: Mr. Allin, how many pins do you suppose are made in a year I thought there must be a good many millions, 'And how many times ho continued, 'is a pin used?' Perhaps twenty on en averageI replied. 'Then at least, twenty times as many matches w'll be needed as pins he concluded, 'and of course it will pay Now, did even Charles Sumner ever size up anything better than 'chat? I made matches several years, red not only that, but I invented them. It was away back in the

30'a when I was a boy. I was always

fooling with the ingredients, brimstone and the like, until finally I struck an idea. Then I went to work and made a few matches, rather crude of course, and showed them to a few friends, but they didn't think it would amount to anything

and I didn't either, at first, so I minded nothing about it till 1834, 1 think it was,

when a friend, persuaded roe to apply for

a patent. It was quite a trip to Wash

ington in those days, but in a few days I got word that a Chicopce man had filed a similar application a short time before mine arrived. I was fiatisfied fchat I could get the patent by fighting for it, but I

didn't think then that it would pay, and so I made an arrangement with the Chicopeo man,by which I was to offer no op

position to his getting the patent, but was to have the right to manufacture matches on my own hook. He get the patent, and I went into the business. I

had quite an establishment on Walnut street, hiring about thirty hands, mostly

girls, and kept it till '37, the time of the

great panic. The Ohicopee man was a

drunken peddler, and he went to Boston

on a spree and gambled the patent away to men who have made their fortunes out of it. Isold match: all through the

country, but there was a good deal of op

position to their manufacture. The pa

pers said it vcas a bid for incendiarism, and many shopkeepers wouldn't sell them. The railroad had got as far as Worcester then, but they wouldn't carry

matches, and I had to liire men to drive

clear through to Boston. There were some other matches in the market that

would crack like a pistol when you lit

them, and when we put some iu a box

and set them, afire it sounded like a small

cannonade. But my matches were like what we ha7e now, and were the first ever made that I know of."

THE BAD BOY.

Immigration. Tho statistics of immigration to the United States from 1820, when an official record was first ordered to be kept, down to March 31, 1883, the latest published, untold a wondrous story. The numbers, nationalities and occupations of the millions who make up this mighty tidal wave, the many minor fluctuations of the

current, its ebbs ana flows, deeps and

shallows, form a curious and interesting index to the history of the period. It is unneccessary to give more than a passing reference to the beginning and early proj gross of this stream the theme is a wellworn one. The immense tide of immigration flowing steadily westward, daily increasing in volume and force, bearing,

seemingly, whole nations on its bosom

has grown from a tiny rivulet, whose existence and course was almost unknown

sixty years ago. During this period

that is, from January, 1820, to April, 1883 a total of aboat 12,000000 people have

landed on these shores and been incorpo

rated with the population of the country. In 1820 the number of immigrants to the United States was 8,385. From that year until the year 1854, when the number reached 427,833, the increase was rapid and steady, being marked by only slight fluctuations. This was followed by a marked decline, the number for th year following being less than half that of 1854, the descent continuing with some irregularity until the year o the War, when in 186V62 the number averaged only a t rifle over S9,000. From this there was a gradual increase until 1870, when the record stood 458,803, being the highest point reached up to that time Again the tide ebbed, the number diminishing each succeeding year until 1878, when it reached 138,409, the lowest figure since War time. Two years later there came a sudden and extraordinary increase, an increase far out Btrippingr in proportions and percentage that of any previous period. For 1879 the number was 177,826, while for 1880 it was 457,257, an increase of nearly 280,000. But this in its turn was beaten by over 200,000 in 1881, when the number stood 669,431, and last year the maximum figure was reached, the statistical records showing the nun ber to be 788,992. 7t is impossible at the first glance to

grasp the real magnitude of these figures.

Immigrants are pouring into the country in sufficient number to populate a city as

big rs Chicago in a year with an overflow sufficient ior another as large as

Cleveland, Pittsburg, or Buffalo. It

peons highly probable that in a few years the immigration will average over a milliDii ner annum.

Why He Was a Democrat. Now Oiiaus T raoi-Domoorat.

A mm was carrying a coon he had just caught when he met three little boys in the road. .All of them said, excitedly and at once, "Mistor, give me that coon; givo use that coon, mister." "Well, boys, I'll tell you what I will do. If yon will tell me what party you belong to and why, I'll give it to the boy that gives the best reason for his faith." "I'm a Republican, because that party saved the Union' said one. "I'm a Greenbacker, because that party is in favor ot plenty of money," said another. When the time of the third boy came he said: Tm a Democrat 'cause I want the coon." In a poorly regulated family a bone of contention olteu develops into a skelelon iu the closet. A stove made in 1828 in York, Pa., was recently sold for $1,000.

t'eok'H Fnn.

"Well, great Julius Ceasar's bald-head

ed ghost, what's the matter with yon

eaid the grocery man to the boy. as he

came into the grocery on crutches, with one arm in a sling, one eye blackened, and a strip of court plaster across . one side of his face. Where was the explosion, or have you been in a fight? Or has your pa been giving you what you deservo, with a club? Here, let me help you. There, sit down on that keg of apple-jack. Well, by the great guns, you look as though you had called somebody a liar. What's the matter?" and the gro

cery man took the crutches and stood them up against the showcase. "Oh, there's not much the matter with me," said the boy in a voice that sounded all broke up, as ho took a big apple ofi the basket and began peeling it with his upper front teeth. "If you think I am a wreck you ought to wee the minister. They had. to carry him home in instalments, the way they buy sewing machines. I am all right, but they have

got to top him up with oakum and tar before he will ever hold water again." "Good gracious, you have not had a fight with the minister, have you? Well, I have said all the time, and I stick to it, that you would commit a crime and go to State prison. What was the fuss about?" and the grocery man laid the hatchet out of the boy's reach for fear he would get excited and kill him. "O, it want no fuss. It was in the way of business. Yon see the, livery man that I am working for' promoted me. He let me diive a horse to haul sawdust for bedding, first, and when he found I was real careful he let me drive an express wagon to haul trunks:. Day before yesterday, 1 think it was (Yes, I was in bed all day yesterday) day before yesterday there was a funeral, and our stable furnished the outfit. It was only a common eleven dollar funeral, so they let me go to drive the horse for the minister you know, the buggy that goes ahead of the hearse. They gave me an old horse tha is thirtv years oid, that has not been oft of a walk since nine years ago, and they told me lo give him a loose rein, and he would go along all right. It's the same old hoiee that used to pace so fast on the avenue, years ago, but I didn't know it. Well, I wan't to blame. I just let him walk along as though he was hauling sawdust, and gave him a loose rein. When we got off of the pavement the fellow that drives the hc-arse, he was in a hurry, 'cause his folks was going to have ducks for dinner, and he wanted to get back, so he kept driving along side of my buggy, and telling me to hurry up. I wouldn't do it, 'cause the livery man told me to walk the horse. Then the minister, he got nervous, and said he didn't know as there was any use of gouig so slow, because he wanted to get bask in time to get his lunch and go to a ministers meeting in the afternoon, but I told him we would all get to the cemetery soon enough if we took it cool, and as for me I wasn t in no sweat. Then one of the drivers that was driving the mourners, he came up and said he had to get back in time to run a welding down to the one o'clock train, and for me to pull out a little. I have seen enough of disobeying orders. I told him a funeral in the hand was worth two weddings in the bush, and as far as I was concerned this funeral was going to be conducted in a decorous manner, if we didn't get back till the next day. Well, the minister eaid in his regular Sunday-school way, 'ATy little man, let me take hold of the lines and like a darn fool I gave them to him. He slapped the old horse on the crupper with the lines, and then jerked up,and tho hearse driver then told the minister to pull hard and aaw on the bit a little, and the old horse would wake up. The hearee driver used to drive the old pacer on the track, and he knew what he wanted. The minister took off his black kid gloves and put his umbrella down between us, and pulled his hat down tight on his head, and began to pull and saw on the bit. The old cripple began to move along sort of sideways, like a hog going to war, and the minister pulled some more, and the hearse driver, who was right behind, he said, so you could hear him clear to Waukesha, Ye-e-np and the old horse kept

going faster, then the minister thought the procession was getting too quick, and he pulled harder, and yelled 'who -a and that made the old horse worse, and I looked through the little : window in the buggy top, behind, and the hearse was two blocks behind, and the driver was laughing.and the minister he got pale and said, My little man, I guess you'd better drive and I said Not much Mary Ann; you wouldn't let me run this funeral the way I wanted to, and now you can boss it, if you will let me get out but there was a street-car ahead and all of a sudden there was an earthquake, and when I come to there were about six hundred people pouring water down my neck, and he hearse was hitchel to the fence, and the hearse driver was asking if my leg as broke, and a policeman was fanning the minister with a plug hat that looked as though it had been struck by a piledriver, and some men were hauhng our buggy into the gutter, and some people were trying to take the old pacer out of the windows of the screes car, and then I guess I fainted away agin. 0, it was worse than telescoping a "rain loaded with cattle' ' "Well, I swan," said the grocery man as he put some eggs in a funnel shaped brown paper for a servant girl. "What did the minister say when he come to?" "Say! What could he say"? He just yelled 'whoa and kept sawing with his hands as though ho was driving. I heard the policeman was going to pull him for ast driving, till, he found it was an acci dent. They told me, when they carried mo home in a hack, that it was a wonder everybody was not killed, and when I got

home pa was going to sass me, until the hearse driver told him it was the minister that was to blame. I want to find out if they got the minister's umbrella back. But I am all right, only my shoulder sprained, aud my legs bruised, and my eye black. I will be all right and shal go to work to-morrow, cuiso the livery man says I was the only one in the crowd that hud any sense. I understand the minister is going to take a vacation on account of hiti liver and nervous prostration. I would if I was him. I never saw a man that had nervous prostration

any inore than he did when they fished him out of the barbed wire fence, after we struck the street cur. But that settles the. minister business with me, J don't drive for no more preachers. What I want is a quiet party that wants to go on a walfe" and J&he boy got up and hopped

on one foot towards his crutches, filling bis pistol pocket with figs as he hobbled

along

"Well, sir," said the grocery man, as he

took a chew of t obacco out of a pail, and onVed some to tho boy knowing that

was the only thing in the store the boy would not take, "Do you know I think some of these ministers have about as little fsenf e on worldly matters, as anybody? Now, the idea of that man jerking on an old pacer. It don't make any difference if the pacer was a. hundred years old, he would pace if he was jerked on." "Yen bet," said the boy, as he put his crutches under hie arms, and started for the door, "A minister may he sound on the Atonement, but he don't want to saw on an old pacer, Be may have the subject of infant baptism down finer than a cambric needle, but if he has ever been to college, he ought to. have learned enough

not to say yo-np, to an old pacer that has been the boss of the road in his time. A

minister may be endowed with sublime

power. to draw sinners to repentance, and make them feel like getting up and dust

ing tov the beautiful beyond, and cause them,by his eloquence, to see angels bright

and fair in their dreams,and chariotsjor fire flying through the pearly gates and down the golden streets of the New Jerusalem, but he wants to turn out for a street car all t he same, when he is driving a 2:20 pacer. The next time I drive a minister to a funeral, he will walk," and the boy hobbled ont and hung put a sign in front of the grocery, "Smoked dog fish at halibut prices, good enough for company." Odd Happening!. Joseph Thompson, of Simmons Gap, Ga., has had nine wives and fifty-three children. A silver dime was found in the yelk of an egg recently broken at the Plankinton House, Milwaukee. A queer presenl; at a hog-killing was a handsome package of candies to each worker and visitor. Gideon Boggs, of Port Elizabeth, w as the host. The only bequest in the will of Morris E. Jones, of Lenoaster County, Pa., gave MaryE. Whiteside his daughter Delia, to do with her as she pleases. ... A Portland, Oregon, expressman put his overcoat over his horse as it stood in the street, while he himself stamped on the sidewalk to keep warm. While seining iu the river t Shippingport, Ky., a fisherman brought up a rubber overcoat containing a pocketbook, iH which were a 50 greenback and a $20 gold piece. "Just for fun" a scoundrel of Richmond, Va., gave a boy a pint of whisky to drink. The boy died, and his murderer hae been sentenced to twelve years' imprisonment. . , v. . Charles Oisweil, of Catawispa, Pa., up on oleaning up the old granary upon the remissa lately occupied by his deceased father, found $700 in old gold and silrer coin in a barrel- of screenings. A California, paper" says; "in passing over the glassy surface of Truckee River, which is now frozen to the bottom, whole schools of trout are seen firmly fixed just where the cold wave struck them. A Lexington, Ky., doctor hangs out the following sign: "Dr. Tooles, scientific carver of toes and limbs; specialist and expert in removing rheumatism; corns and cramps extracted according to nature." .. ' ,, ' .... The oldest son of Farmer Saunders, of Richardson County, Nebraska, cut out hetmgue of his younger brother heoause he threatened to tell their father of eome offense that the elder brother had committed. A well to-do farmer, living near Reading, Pa., created a sensation by bringing his three young and handsome daughters into court as the plaintiffs in three separate actions for breach of promise of marriage.

IN TUB HARBOR.

Manufactured Spices. New York Sun. 4Wooden nutmegs are things of the past, young man," said an East Side grocer to the reporter. 'They have been superceded." "What has taken their places?"

"Just step around the counter here and

I'll show you. Do you see that box of spices? They look very nice, don t ; they ?

Just smell 'em. They smell strong, don t

they? Now, taste 'em; they taste good,

too, as spices go. Well, young man, what do you think of 'em?"

"Prom all appearances I should say

that they were a fair lot of spices."

"That just where your judgment falls

short. Thev are not spices at all,"

'What are they, then?" ,

"Just ground coooanut shells, flavored with spice extracts. The difference in

color comes from burning the shells.

Why do I keep 'em? Because people want 'em. Of course they are a fraud from beginning to end. But they are

cheap, and people want cheap spices, just

as they want every thing else cheap. Large quantities are manufactured and shipped all over the country. They are

sold as genuine spices, but any grocer

with a particle of sense knows from the prices that they can not be the real article. You see, they look, taste aud smell fully as well as the simon pure, but put 'em in food aud you will soon see the difference. They do not flavor. A drop of clove extract will smell stronger than twenyt pounds of cloves, but I think the twenty pounds would flavor more hot rums, don't you? . "You have no idea of the ingenuity that is used in getting up these and other imitations. The best chemical knowledge is employed. What do you think of stamping out whole peppers and cloves? It is done, though. Young man, tho general grocery trade is extending. With glucose for sugar, olemargarino for butter, cheese innocent of milk, and cocoanut shell spices, it is becoming a big business." Difference iu Com, Kansas Pawner, Any party noticing the variety of corn coming to market will often see loads of corn with the kernels not over one fourth of an inch in length, cob large and heavy. Seventy pounds of such corn in the ear would not make over -46 or 50 pounds of shelled corn, while the best variety of deep-grain corn will yield from 60 to CO

pounds of shelled porn from 70 pounds in the oar. The loss in a few bushels is

but email ; but take a crop c f 80 acres, averaging 46 bushels to the acre, and a gain of 6 pounds per bushel would make over 30 bushels of the shelled corn in favor of the good seed. Thus if the best seed cost 10 more than the poor seed it Would pay to .gel the best

fkonsfc How. When I oomparo What I have lost with wr at I havo gained, What I imve missed with what attained, Little room do I firitl for pride. I am aware How many dp ye have ben idly epent; How like an arrow the good intent. Has fallen short or been tamed aside. Bnt who shall dare To meneorp loss and gain in this wife? Defent may be victory in disgnise; : The lowest ebb is tle turn of the tide.

CONDIMENTS.

3 ?

A gentleman at the theater sits behind a lady who wears a very large hat. "Excuse me, madam, but unless you remove

your hat I can see a'brolutely nothing." Lady ignores him, Excuse me, madam, but unless you remove your hat something unpleasant will happen." Lady ignores

him again. Gentleman puts on his own hat

Loud cries from the audience: "Take oil

that hat! Take off that hatr Lady

thinks they mean her hat, and remove it;

"Thank you, madam.

One of the sweetest pictures of domestio

economy is a poet blacking a white stock

ing so that it won't show through the fie-r

sure of his boot. A seatside belle having left herbatbinpshoes out of the hotel window to dry, the town paper announced that the hotel had erected new awninps of a unique desigr, "They say Charlie has married. Do yoa know his wife? Is she a woman of any intelligence? Is she woll-iuformed?M'"Wel !- informed? "Well I should say so. She has belonged to the village sewing-circle for ten years and never missed a meeting.' A famous North" Carolina clergyman

while preaching a few Sundays ago from the text, "He givtth . His beloved sleepy! -a?. ' - stopping in the middle of bisdiscours?,v: . gazed upon his slumbering congregation and said : "Brethren , it is hard to realize the unbounded love which the Lord appears to have for a large portion o iny

auditory." f , s '. A young man married against-the

wishes of his parents, and in telling a

friend how to break the news of them,

said: "Tell them flit t that I am dead an -?s gently work up to the climax." : S5S A man up town made , a wager witbJal lady that he could thread a needle quicker than she could shamen a lead penciL The; .- - -Io nian won ; time, 14 nunutes and 40 seconds. It is thought the result would have been different if the woman had not run out of lead pencil inside of five minutes,

A young politician explained the tattered condition of his trowsers to his father , by stating that he was sitting under sn apple tree enjoying himself, when the faxmers dog came along and contested his " seat. K " j A Safe Game." -", v " -Arkansas Trayeler. ' , The Arkansas Judge, as a supporter of the law, knows nothing but the discharge of hie duty, or rather what he considers his duty. He is never influenced, unless

the pressure is great. The other day a negro charged with a misdemeanor was taken before a rural Judge, who, after hearing the testimony, said: "I shall have to fine him to the full extent of my financial jurisdiction. I shall make an example of him and send him to jail." 1 "Jedge, I uster work at yer house, didn'tl?" ,-. ... Z "Yes, but you needn't attemt any sympathy game on me" "I ain't er gwine ter ax fur no - sympathy, as yer calls ity an' yer needn't skeer yerse'f. Yerse'f is a big man in de church, an' is hiT up as de zaniple ob a good-husband; but I uster to work at yer house, an' ef yer plasters one ob dem fines on

me I'll proclamate some mighty disagree

able rows in dis neighborhood. Je6 go ahead, sab, an' send me ter jail; but 011 de road der ef I coan 'mul$ate some 'tei-

ligence 'bout yerse'f, eah -sutbin' what I di skivered while I was workin' at yet house dat'll make de folks stan aroun'

an ax fer mo'." " " ' 1 " .

"Get out of this Court-room," demand

ed the Judge,4 -and if-I catch you here

again it won't be good for you. Mr. Offi

cer, let the sconncrel proceed."

"Has he paid his fine, Your Honor?" "Paid nothing. He was never known to pay any thing." '"What was de faoks jdat yer had on de Jedge?' asked an acquaintance when the "prisoner" left the room. . ..... "No thin. Doan know a thing agin de man; but, lemmo tell yer, you can try

dat game on any ob em wid success."

milk

Why Judge Black Uses the Weed.

Washington Correspondence New York World,

Not long ago Ji tdge Black met a gentle

man who pathetically related his endeavors to break himailf of tobacco-chewing, as it met with the unqualified condemnation of all civilized people, "You'll find it a

hard case a hard case, my friend," replied

the Judge, with a solemn wink, "I tiled

to brefk myself of it once didn't I ever

tell you? Well, it was when I was Attorney general, and I raid to myself, 'Jefenuah

Black, we've got to stop this thing.' So I

made up my mind, and one morning I

started down to my office without a scrap of tobacco. I .began the day badly, and it got worse by degrees, I never felt so much like a savage in my life. I dismissed two olerks, bounced a messenger, made a fool

of myself three or four times, snapped at everybody, and started home feeling my

self to be a total failure and all creation a mistake. On the way I met a man whom I respected very niuoh. He was a religious man. I told him my experience with leav

ing off tobacco, and asked his, advice

'Judge.' he said, my experience is the

same ns yours. L tried to leave on, too; x quarreled with several members of the

ohurch I belonged to, thought the minister

was a fool got tired .ot m wife, and it I had

kept it up I should have been a moral

monster and I determined to circumvent the old enemy by taking up my cherished

vice.' And so" continued the Judge,

cheerfully, "I Haw that tobacco chewing 4 was conduoive to virtue, and (cutting? .4 quid) I propose to keep it up until I leayk -it oft" The: Wine State. California is rapidly coming to the f rent as the great wine-producing country of America. During the year 1881 the vintage wa s estimated at 9j00i),000 gallons, and fo 1882 it was supposed to -have been between 10,000,000 and ll,000r 000 gallons. Considerably more than 4 two-third is used at home, while the rest is exported, chiefly to Eastern cities. The effect of the California vintage is certainly felt in Franoe, as within the last two or three years the falling off in the export of champagne wines to the United States has been marked. It is predicted thai within ten yea rs a large part of the wine drunk in the United States will .be prc duced in OaJWorni.