Semi-weekly Independent, Volume 2, Number 44, Plymouth, Marshall County, 11 April 1896 — Page 6

EFFORT. noiiirh t.. tern- the b re. lit fr harmonies t eoi.n. eta hot ih-stial fire utiuan h' arts are cold n: uximh. enough t ealraly wait uicki-mtig ili'w should uii us fall, ly I ng for wliat is great 'til! pursuing what is small. " nough with tears of woe I for all the world's distress, s that frai iaartion tl.v . mr other lives, will bless. tmough th- love to take ther hearts on ours outvour; is only kept av;;i!c hit: something from its store. cnor.uh with ih-i.oji:i wing inli ss ;'; tu walk thi- earth; o:,e t an h;-sin:r bring rov:i :ho soul with sov'reitrn r:ii.

anotl. v ignr. lieutenant." I shihg the box .H toss tin table him. t iiii ii U yrti." ho icpli.-il: "hut. ill pern; is-Ion. I'll Mil my pipe or bowl. Indeed, v. hon I came ur n unii it was only for a litth rat: out myself cigars all vnd hoy." it is nlready 11 o'clock. ! how tinio nies when m gets oticiti--. Hut. to oontiiuto " when n y good friend I.ieut-n-tsh takes .os"ssioü of !iu ami u :it il p. in.. I !o not always .' it i:.y It;:y to liston to him. Im-ch su--h a l'r qtiont visitor of iMi ho Las been staying at our g house, ami. hell, lie is of uliv!lt:a Is who so lose th-in-l their mvvii narrations that they :rot th- have m audicn-. So. lio lieutenant s.ii:!: "Now. to o" I said, deeper into by big -ITi gazed absontly into th- tiro, i? talking war .'a re of tin- future. aivd I for tha!. who tossessi-d stocks that v.oi.M go down inr OnUcIs that Would go 11',. M.v I'. -'1 w.-ari'y: how I wished 1I no. Then ho mado a st:iteabsurd that I laughed. ok 'lit-- o oü July i'i. let;." I lint say. ii o:i fo"Ty-si.."" I i-oi . im toil. , boo here." aid il.r naval man. 'JIov oi.l ilo you think 1 am -sli.ivv! I wv.s :'. tl.on. It was nd ili';s.' don': ontiadi' i me. tifty yi-ai's heme it all iiaji-

nil will have it so. all

u. U." I

' tl:0 tla'O Is settled and oil lh!y umh-rsta ud tin- -aus of the

Great r.;-i!::in -l:?i:;:od the at- t t no -.. ; nie ot tli" oarth to a ; of loom f.-cT. basing iho i lair:; !

fi t that as tar !a k as v.;: :nt i ! !:i 1' ;:!. h:i'l ilisaj.poari'il ii o::i I th:U li iriiT -ho was ncvoi Sii'h a ' kri::! as tliis. hail it I- on zo'l ov othor nations, woukl ivoii h-; tiHi :Toat a : onf.ol ovo; nl's suji-ly of l.rt a th. V;'. rlainio alt it n I" of l.M!o ovit iho I" nitres. Im: sin- would not rooonizo ad i-'-fti-"''. to arbitrato. Tho was war t' Viioh war." k i:ry I'ii'O fnna leiwirn my Jlld ÜÄ'od a o.dil oyc on tho r. .n-!iai.t Swash.." I sail! in a low

itilJ' t toiio. "yotl Lave eNI'h'.ineil j .Us'o of tho war live titties. 1 j avallowd yo',r i!;tc and may

. to rnlt ike.vn your fa-t. hut I at yon desist froia rep tit ion." 11. will, if you'il Lav.- it Til ad. II;ivi!"4 l!" e;,;i- strailii r mind, yoti will n-ia-Tdior that July 1;. l:h. ti:at t!:" li-hr oe- . Ther" wen- three k'ttie sldos Ilet: Admiral W;nlV !'.;' shi. vallo'v. . arry::. lift : a t..ns of litt ;fid rv.o machine irnns; t!:o linz. a;t:. in i:.'ower. ten tons nl" ditc ami two six-im-h ritj.-s; iho . Oii'tain Wind, eleven tons of lite ami one jmeumatie un. Useil ro;vii: c::ilosives ai the nciny ? she ;rot a'ovo us. ',"- wen- uc.nied ly two siK.'tll tori"do boats e swift r.nartaored i-ruisi-r Kala- . v.o eT;e-oi to in- of I J t rviei. since a bullet could have urel Iht aiel sent her to earth :r. W hiy about ."m miles east ;v York for four days, awaiting Iroaeh of the en-'niy's llyin.ur iron. It was 1 " loek on the of July 1; when wo sighted about U'! milrs away, running 'it us at raiid rate. They must seen us at about the same time, oy sheered off a little toward the ' and beau to rise. .iniral Wad, at whose .-"ale I was

Unj: ou the iniarter deek of the

ov. at oiiee nmlei'stood their uver. In modern warfare it's the

I' who els above the other and

dynamite on him that wins inbly. We wep- then at an allif abotit .(ii feet and did not lose

'Anw ettii: higher. I ran see the

lil old admiral now as lie stood at Switch board coolly jujMin. his i a.s if lie was xit his elub down in

York, There was not a tremor

'vabk? in his hi! thin lim; r as he

?1 the button marked 'i.' Then

'jjr.in to aseetiil.

;o two other bat lie ships followed, is we arose we cleared for action.

Kalamazoo and the torpedo boats

left behind, as it was not deemed

lable to expose their frail struc-

l to the enemy's lire. oufess, as I sin od besjde my brave

1.1- '111:1 fl'lr lilil" shin I I I. Ill II t i tl"

h'T and higher and shootini; on to

il the enemy at a speed of ninety

4 an hour: watehed tin crew of ten coolly placim; dynamite bombs in

most convenient places: saw the

v frreat .steel balloons of our en-

a 'sotindron slistenin m the sun-

; as they shot toward us, I felt that

strange Inward spiisation that heretofore I believed could only be caused by a W lsh rabbit at - a. in." "You must drink a jrood deal of ale with your Welsh rabbits, lieutenant," I ventured, mildly. I'm a total abstainer, sir." he replied, juietlv. "And never did I have more cause to be thankful for it than on that day. I was in full possession of my mental faculties: otherwise I would never have been able to have lived through those awful two hours. And the crew, too I never saw a braver set of fellows in my life; not a moist eye or a trembling lip anionic them. "The enemy had two lirst-dass bailie ships and two second-class. They advanced in a lim parallel to ours. Admiral Wad signaled Commodore Blower to en.ira tre t ho t wo second-class ships on the It'll . to Wind to take the rhrl.t. leaving us the Hair ship in the center. This vessel, l saw through my glasses, was a little larger, but of almost the same coast ru.efion as the Swallow. There was a jrreat cylindrical balloon of steel, fully soo feet in length, with the car swim;' beneath it: an armored turret fore and aft. protecting her Willis; at her stern a irrcat propeller fan and two hu'e rudders for siecnntr. I saw her crew rtiiininu," to and fro rettin in readiness for the conllict; her commander with a little knot of otlicers about him standinu forward, eagerly scanning our fleet. Higher and higher we arose, the air rapidly jrettiii.tr more and more rare and our breathinc becoming more and more rapid. I looked down at the sea. which was jrliinmerinjr lö.ciH feet below us in the sunlight: I turned my eyes at the reat cylinder overhead: shot holes in two of its airtight compartments and what a fall! I.rt tliTi' were other thinjrs to think of. " 'Admiral.' I jr-ispnl. 'if we ;:o much higher wo shall die for want of air.' "'.Mr. Swash,' replied the jrrand old salt, "duty before breath alwaysremember that. sir. I'm afraid the ship will not carry much higher. We'll p-t over them, don't you think. Captain IlowitzerV "Howitzer jrazod anxiously at the enemy, who wer. now within tifleen miles, and replied: " 'lose call, sir.' "Then to liie men: " "Stand ready to drop a 1in of dynamite on tin in if we pi over them:' "As he spoke there was a puff on the omeny's llajr rdiip. and a solid shot came siimintr h.;lf a mile below us. Old Wad laughed, and ordered the bow trull to return the tire when we were within live miles. Our shells passed over them. We had then reached as hiuh an altitude as it was possible for the ships to lioat. and then we reduced sp"ed. They approached to within two miles and stopped and bean to circle about us. evidently intending to s.tbj et our balloons to a cross lire. Higher than we ihey could not o. and the discovery of this fact brought jeers a::d ch its fn.m our crew. "For some fifteen minutes there was terrible suspense. Each vessel circled warily around iis chosen opponent, ban.u'ii.u' away with its machine pins in vain endeavor to puncture tho enemy's balloon. Hut the distance was too pvat and the movements of the vessi-ls too ipiick for any successful ''im work. Suddenly 1 low itz seized my arm and pointed toward the Lijrlilnintr. lb r crew had just thrown overboard her whole cabin, her two pins and a pvat quantity of dynamite bombs. "i'or a moment we were speechless with aslonisluii 'nt. Were they pin, to take to UiuhtV Admiral Wad seized

a i!a;r to sipial Commander I!hwer. but he just pi as far as d a-m w hen he sti.jj.i-d. Slowly tho peat vessel was mounting in t!n air. A cry of dismay v.as heard from the hostile ship with which vh,. was emra:r; d. In live luinui. s she v.as bo feet above i hem. The iti itish ciew madly threw overboard all the Weight Ihey ca riied - pins, bombs and rverythinp -but Ihey were too late; tho I.i-hi nii.i; was above them; then a black object shot down on them; a deafening roar followed, with a rush of wind that hurled the Swallow a mile out of her course. And w hen we looked toward the Iairhtninjr she was alone. but slowly sinking toward Ihe sea, for tie- eiii-i:ssion had torn off Hie end of her balloon cylinder. We could see her

crew at the rail cheeriiifr wildly. "Admiral Wad at one ordered that we pursue the same tactics; everything went by the board, pins, and all ammunition but live bombs. We loost lied some rivets in the lloor and let the cabin fall: then we, too. be-an to lise. I'.ut tho r.ritih admiral was not to be outwitted, tor he had been busy at exactly the same work, and when we found ourselves 1,000 feet higher he lay a mile away at the same altitude. "Admiral Wad swore. Our puis were p.hc. and we could have lain tle re for eternity and not harm each other, unless we dosed. I'or a lon time he paced the deck ill silence. At lciiph he called the men top-ilier, and in a neat, louehinjr speech asked for one volunteer for a forlorn hope. "All that can be done.' he said, Ms to ram the enemy. One man .and myself can hanill-' the ship, and it woald bo useless for you to slop on board simply to lose our lives.' "Hvery man volunteered: every man offered to stay in their onimander's plaec. i hose me for his companion, since I alone of all Ihe crew was unmarried, and Im positively refused to ae-i-pi a Substitut. 1 le would jr ilwn Willi Ihe old ship, he said. "The si-eiie that flhwod was most loiichiir'. The men wrunj the brave old maii's hand in a last parliup One by one thy took their parachutes. swuiij: over the sih ami went sailing ft way Into tho blue. "The last man was pn and ohl Wad Himed toward in" ami embrace! me. Itetwecn his emotion and the extrem ra ritten t ion of the air h' could not socak. This show of feeling lasted but

1 minute, for wo were brought to our senses by a pvat cheer from the enemy's crew. They believed the ship leseti'l and wore bearinjr hwi toward us. Instantly the admiral straightened up ami firmly pusheil th button, turnimr the full force of the electric current into the propellinjr motors. The pvat ship swunjr around ami with terril'n speed sail'l at t In enemy. The enemy tried to swinjr th'ir ship out of the course, but in vain. In a minute we struck them. A crash like a tlnusand peals of thunder, a Hash like the explosion of a dynamite factory ami all w as si ill. Ami when I looked apiin there was tiothimr but blue, the endless blue of infinite space. The Hawk and her two opponents had been wivcki-d 1 suppose by the awful concussion." Lieutenant Swash had finished his narration ami for a lorn; lime pufiVl silently at his pipe. I. for my part, was rapt in silent wonder at th man. I knew Swash well, but such assimilier as this I had not believed him capable of. After all. h was one of those per

sons who li' so habitually that, com- i

imr fr m them, a story of their own h'.-itli was not stirprisinp Smhh'idy I was thrown violently from my chair to the lloor. ami when I recovered my senses I was bournl fast in a blanket, and. lookini; up. saw the naval man bcmlinjr excitedly over m'. "IIciv you've been sloi-pinjr all this time." he iM'jrnn. "ami instead of hearing about my last cruise. pt your foot into the lire. A pretty ketth of fish! Charred your slippers and trousers in line styl"." "Lieutenant Swash." said I. rising to my feet, "1 wish my dream had been t rii." "Why:" "I? cause you'd have been blown to pieces when the Swalhnv struck."--New York Lwninjr Sun. nu Trees with One Trunk. 1'uur miles from I'inevilh". .M Iona!d County, on th pvumls of ,1. L. Parish, i-s a fivak of nature so curious that if I had not seen it with my own 'y-s. says a contributor to an exchüiip. I could sera--ly have believed it possible. (11 the bank of the Klk river rises a kirjr" ireo that towers hi.uh above the neighboring tr vs. At the p-ottnd a solid buttressed trunk appears from oijrhl to t'ii fe.'t in liameti-r. A lit lie higher than a man's head litis trunk divides into four lesser trunks, the two smaller of which are in themselves fair-sized t rees. while 1 he ! hT t wo are fa r abve tl;e ;iver;i.L'e size. Ib-r mos in tin" iiicer part of the story, of these U--orr-iit trunk-, the two larp ones aiv respeciively an 'int and a sy-amuv. while the two smaller 01ms are an oak t!e common trunk cadi thre in leaf, ami a sycamon-. Above the union d' brato h at d bark is normal to its type. Tiie trunk itself seems a lmmeopmous winde. I would not presume to say that dose examination would not showin Ihe bark from dih'ctvut sections of tie trunk those peeuliaril ies that Iistinuuish the bark of om tree from that of th oth't but --rlainly th's char-

a-teristi's do not .:iear a ursory -x- j aminalion. nor are there lines of jointure visible where the four trunks -o-ah'see. I doubt if anyone can point to n stranpT jrrowth than this tw sycamoivs, an oak and an elm, all powimr from one common trunk. This lueetinjr b'P'thr of four youlhful tree trunks as they thekemd with a;r is asionally seen, but this is an unusually line illustration. Kadi tree must, howwer. form ils own bark thai is to say. no ope of them has been Wholly ell Vi'Iopeil by another. Ilcliee a careful invest ipit ion ujrht to dis-lo-v a slPrht line win to th im-urvin bark of cadi original ttve meets. IJoonvilh Oemocrai. I'rcpiur'i Ii: I'mcri'tu-ics. A der-ryiuaii. well kimwn for his love of "iH.TSftlesh.' was liiinjr throujrh a country villa p the other day. breaking in a new horse, when h overlook a doctor of his acipiaintam v 1 1 foot. ".lump in. ddor," he eti.'d, pullint; up. "I've pit a horse her that it is a prfect treat to sil b-himl." The dodo, junip'l in. and lh parson lrov off. The horse was "a I real" in the .sense of speed ami sk il I islmess. and presently stood stock-still, and shot boih hind l"i:s undrmalh the trap, splitting it to pi-es ami throwing out Poth the o-eupa Ills. The loctor jllinpi I lo his fi-el, feeling hiiusi If all o r I see if he was iu-

juri I. The man of cloth also pit upon his feet. "Look Im-H'!" elailiie the loctor, "wlial on earth lo you mean by invitinjr im' to rile behind a horse like thair" "W'II. you s"e," pisp-I the jovial hlic. "luckily ther' are lio bones broken; bid when breaking in a bprar like this, I like to have a doctor with tiM-r" Cbarli s liUml Wrote tin- A 11 1 i 11 i t y . Om-e and araiii, il wouM seem, a man is born inlo l he world Im -la I I. SI rayed out of a past ap, he nies ai oiijr us like an alien. ivs iviiiov' and sii.-jru-lar, ami lies a stranp r. Tln-re was a touch of I his si iviiip-iicss in Charles Lamb. .Mudi as he was loved and bf riciiiled. h was iiol much umlerstood; for h- dpv al f In his si ulics, a.T"ct-d a "s-lf plasiiijr piainl ncss" in his tye. took no pains to hit the taste of his day, wanlTl ai sw-l liberty in an ap whi-h couhl scarcely have bred sin-h another. "Ha 11.4 th av:'!" In cried. "I will write for aiuhpiily." And h Md. II' wrote as if il were t ill haksp'ares day; made th authors of that spacious time his (instant companions and study; ami loliberatcly became himsidf "the last of tin i:ii.abethans." When a new book came out, he said, he always ival an old one. Century. A horse that is cared for by a woman looks ratfKed, but is terribly fuU

SUPPOSE YVE SMILE.

HUMOROUS PARAGRAPHS FROM THE COMIC PAPERS.

Pleasant Inrhlrntn Occurrlnj; the 'VTorM Over Sayings Thut Are Cheerful to tho Old or Young -Funny Scle'tIont That Everj body A ".'ill Fnjoy IloadLnj.

It Wan Awful. He knelt at her feet, while she regarded him coldly. "This. then, is "the last':" he asked, despairingly. Vs." "Well. I will h the best I can." he aid. "but it is pimr to be a tough job to lit a Ö I foot with a sho made on a S A.N." Cim-innati I'mjuirer. Died from :i Natural Cause. Insurance Superintendent (suspiciously) How did your husband lio so smii after p-ttin:; insure! lr a larp' amotintV Widow - II workeil h.imself n leath frying to ay the premiums. Weekly 'lYlopaph. Narrow 1 .scape. ''I wouldn't p throuiih that ajrain for a jrood deal," .ail the pugilist, with a shudder. "What was it V A railway ao-ilent':" "Worse. 1 was mabdicd for ;i tiht ami the managers on both sids came pretty near forp'ttinir to lmtify the authorities in time for them to prevent it coniinir off !" Wnshinpon Star.

liartlcal Isni,stration. Po you say 'armful' or "armsful? she asked, looking up from the book they were reading top'ther. "I should say armsful.'" he rcpli, and his practical application settled all rhetorical dit'iciilties. Detroit Free l'ress. A .Man of Promise. Neighbor Youmr Smithers is loin line in New York City, I hear. He was a mip'ity promising younjr man Miss Uhlers (tartly) Yes, and if ho don't be back hon pretty soon making some of them piod he'll have a law suit 0:1 his hands! New York Herald.

Trii;

L vident.

' "

"What makes you think he is flUrhty V" "He has a scheme for navigating tho air." Always a Hin Ito.v. It makes no lüfert tice Low little a boy is. When his mother soMs him slu always says: "You outrht t le ashame! of yourse!f-a bi boy like you!"- - Jlxchanp'. Helpful at Toker. Col. Stak-r 'hippor -1 think th's Itoenlp'ii apiratus mitrht htlp me puty e'nsid'ble in my business -C;l. (lieckcr Hlu- In wliat way, suhV "Say it enables ye t' . ( ri'ht through a man's hand."--Cleveland riahnlealer.

Oriirin of an Mx prcssion. Yeast 1 believe in battle the musicians always p to the rear! Crimsonbeak Yes. ami that is the reason so many wouhl-be soldiers think they wotdd be willing to face the music. Yonk rs S!a t es man. lor Thin-! "There will be n ailvanlap about th lmrseh'ss carriap,' sahl Maud Hthel. "It w.n'l mistake the sound of a kiss fr a chirrup to p faster and compel Ihe vumr man to p-ab the reins with both hands." Cincinnati Kmpiirer. The. llvil One. Mrs. Ulossoni--.be,' I wish you would brinir up a scuttle of coal ami some kindlim:. Mr. r.lossom (mtisinply, as la wanders tw aril t h llar -The tvil one alway limls wrk for idle hands to do. Han I'ram is Wave. A Hard Train in;. Head of Firm -Have you hal any e.p'ri-iiee in coli tinirV Applicanl -I should say I had. I us'd to a country minister. .Iudp. A Good Course, l'at -Hello, Mike. Oi hear yez have a noo job? Mike- Shore I have l'at. Cat And how are Ihey all up yure way? Mik--Kvcryb.dys sick. Fat Aye, aye! That's too bad, man. Mike oh. no: I'm workin at Ihllevue. Harper's r.a.ar. Needed It.

f -7"

, M-Vk trsnS-

11 I

fr-jri

slaved frini Destruction. This ! wliat !i.-ii';i'ns wln-a the kiihioy are rosi.-in-l fr-:a Inactivity l.y Il .stet ti-r's Stoniacli liitt'Ts. If tiu'y i.nti'ii; ir.aetlvp they are titreato-.ic.l with Ihil.t's I'ls.-aso. l!ahotes or some o'Lcr niilaily whi.-h wotkü thoii- ih't:jrie-t:.n. Malari;d. l.;!i.n:- ami rheu-matii-aiinu'iit :vA !yspeiia arc alsn cunipiro'I hy tb' iiuttrs. wiii. h i ihorouiju aud 'tToctivo.

A docile disposition will, with appli cation, surmount every dillieulty. Manliu--!. With hut little care and no trouble, the hoard and incstaeh- -.w h kept a uniform hnnvn or hla-k -olor by using Buckingham's Dye for tho Whiskrs. Prefer loss before unjust sain, for that briap srrief but once, this forever.

1 i r

1"'. ? ' r ; ' -ftr

IIa

Mr. I'.oodh s You bepin life as a bare-f;oted boy, I understand? New Clerk Yes. sir, I was born without shoes.

CoinmctMlahle Versatility. An -ditor received the other day a curious application for help. The writer said: "I am sorry you do not like my romance, for 1 feel that I have the secret lire in my veins. If, however, you cannot aevpt my book or my poetry will you ive me a berth as a heavy piods porter';" London P.ook111:111. When lie' (lone. "Ho-hum!" siuhed Cummin Wc-le. "I wish those wheels in electnety would hurry up their work"' Truck llyder W"t idee ye pt now, Cummin? "Then we kin start out hunt in" a job 0' tendiif hurses." Cleveland Tost.

IJ.-ixtcr Street Arithmetic. Fond Father--I low many da two and two make? Hopeful Son -Six. F. F. You ipe traut lit lie beprar! Int you know that two and tw-j make four? H. S. Oh. tps: I knew that, but I thought you'd beat me down a bit. Kxchamre.

Your Moid in Sprae is almost certain to 1 e full of impurities the aeti:r.ukit on of t!ie winter months. Iki I ventilation of sleepin;; lvoins. ituiure air in Iweliitis, factories :uid sl;oj).s. ovi r-e;itinpr, heavy, iiiip'oj rr f( uC.s. ahme f the kidneys and liver properly to do extra w rk thus thicst uion th. in. urn tha piime causes of this condition. It i$ of the ulmo.-t importance, that you

our Blood

Nov.-, as whon warnu r weather comes ami the Knie effect f cold, bracing :a'r in :one, your weak, thin, impure blood will n:t furnih neees:iry st remit h. That tired feeling. 1" of appetite, will open the way for .-crious lie;ise, 111 ned hedth, or break he out of humors ami impurities. To m:ike 't;re, rir.'.i, red blood Hood's Sarsap:irilla stands une(4ua!ied. Tliousands te.-tify to it s merits. Millions take it os th..-ir .pri:: Medicine Cot Hood's, 1 ca;;.-o

Not t-') in Finance. Binkeriou Oil and water will not nii-. Fil.zarlie Oil, pshaw! The directors of the Standard Oil Company know better than that. Truth. A Cold Inspiration.

Sarsapari'la 1 the OnoTrup l'.'ond Purilirr. A I lrucrivts. $1, rre;-;r-l only l.y ( I. IIimi.I .s. Co., l.o.v. il. VIas. HoodTPills XÜt

4-1

law in your own hands, ladies, when you ask for

"Serawler, th iet, is spending: the month of March at tin sea shore, writing a summer poem for a .Inly maira-

, zme.

Eias Velveteen Skirt Binding and don't get it. Sentence such a store to the loss of your trade and ive it to merchants who are willing to sell what you demand. Look for S. H. & A.,M on the Label. and take no other. If your dealer will not supply you xrs will. Send for samcSes. shcvlng lab?!s and natria!. lothe S. H. Si M.'Co . P. 0. 2nx eQ9. Nv Yr.-- C-.VP

S. N. U.

No. !.--!)

ZI j i I pr. sir ( mi (Mm rii

im is f 1 mt .s j , "ii . (i 1

v l."A:..,i. x l Ic I

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E - k A II

-J -I;.:, 'ri i.i'.'l t

'ii l'ty; üi'illi

.1 Ml. .i.l I ( I ' . I J 1

"My pmmI hum, I never sent for you l 1 11 im our piano!" ".No, matlani; it was the peoph m-.t do. r."

Suvol r (in-iit Deal of Lnbnr. Tho Vicar (lo sexbii)-Yhj don't you - that the i-aLs in the church are dusted now and then, Tombs? Toinl's (ihe sexton) 1 do. sir; the en!ro;atioii he it every Sunday tuoriiius, sir.-Aiiswer.

Ciiiit inus Wool Toots died as he lived, I suppose? Van reit He took off his shoes befou h climhed the golden siait Kxchamre.

as gcoa

It Seems Too Ial. Miss I'rovincial Vou say that this is a loan exhibit of portraits V (od ha mite Ves. Miss I'rovim-ial Doesn't it seem awful that wealihy people are obliged to raise money on their family portraits like this? Exchange. For Want of Tlsoiiiiht. She lie whistled as he went for want of tluniirdit. Of course it was a boy. Vou wouldn't lind a jrjrl whistling for want of thought. He No. she wouldn't whistle; she'd talk. India napolis Journal.

Not Ncoi's-i;iril.v Cheap. What did you buy this piec of music for?" askol Mr. Parley, crossly, as lit took up a shiot fron the piano. -I bought it for a sou:,'," replied Mrs. DarL-y, sweetly. Detroit Free Tress.

Just 1ike u tluh. Mrs. (latham Maria. lo you think it riirht that a married woman like you should receive steady company from so many men': Mrs. Porkson (of Chicago) oh. they are all on my waiting list, you know. Kxchanire.

A Martyr. N")rtheru What lime lo you set up, Clomd? (,'td. De Kanter Five in summer, (J in winter. Northern lh you lind early rising agrees with yotiV (il. D Kantr No-o, hut the bar (hui't ask me when they sliall open. Kxchanire.

To I.;ili'. "Fall ajrain." she said, as he took her ha ml at part ing. "Thank you. 1 will," he replied, "hut not to-night." "You couhln't call again to-night," she said sweetly. And then for tin first time In had an idea that it was after 1L Kxchange.

Of Ciirwe She lhl. Admirer Do you believe iu the divine passion. Mis Sweet? Miss Sweet Yes; I'm engaged to marry a minister. St. Paul Dispatch

One

as another,

It is easy to say th

one preparation k as good as another; and it is easy to waste money by buying something you know nothing about and receiving no benefit When the body is weak and you want to give it strength, when health is failing; what Wisdom is there in experimenting with a substitute, when for a few cents more you can buy the original article? For more than twenty years Scott's Emulsion has been the standard Cod-liver Oil emulsion It contains more pure Norwegian Cod-liver Oil than any other emulsion in the world; and will stand the test of time as being a perfect; inseparable emulsion You can't afford to take a substitute for it