Saturday Evening Mail, Volume 15, Number 49, Terre Haute, Vigo County, 30 May 1885 — Page 2

THE MAIL

'W:~

A PAPER FOR THE PEOPLE.

TERRE HAUTE, MAY 30. 1886.

LIVE IT DOWN.

%W3 If

Have you made some great mistake, That baa caused the world to frown? Would you see new smiles awake, O'er bill and dale and lake?

Do, not talk, bat live It down.

Have you shocked the public taste In your cut of thought or gown, You most never be in baste With your pot of verbal paste

—AW*/*?# -fc

To patch ft op, but live it down.

Are you accused of vile misdeeds, Like calling tenderly a noun, In your reading of the needs That transcend all human creeds,

jrk

Don't explain but live it down.

'i-

Have you marred some social law, Making gossip for the town, Never seek to mend the flaw $ By words that seem as light as straw ,,

In your talk, but live it down. -ife.-

Is your name allied to scorn Till you tremble for your crown Would you dull each cruel thorn, And achieve a glorious morn,

In silonce live it down. ,•

Be the trouble what it may,

With a courtier or clown, Would you end an ugly fray, Take advice humbly pray,

Do not talk.but live It down.

—Ida C. Billinan.

[Harper's Weekly.] $*

Cousin James.

It has been observed by Mr. Spencer and others that the march of the passing •ears has a tendency to calm the odor of youth and moderate the passions of man, and yet there are notable exceptions to this rule, and old age is notieeably querulous about trifles. Here is a case iu point.

Mr. Tbeophilus Brown was in a tremendous rage simply because he could not find his spectacles. It was as fine a May morning—it was nearly ten by the clock—as you ever saw in New York city. The sun was sbining very brightly without, and the air was fresh and •e:nal. Within Mr. Brown's library the air was not quite so fresh, but it was •ery cozy and comfortable, not to mention luxurious, and Mr. Brown sat in a velvet-covered chair that might have soothed a man of war and yet he tamed and twisted in his chair, pulled out each successive desk drawer with a jerk and closed it with a bang, tumbled over, tho papers with reckless disregard of Heaven's first law, and then began to look into all sorts of impossible places— ont of the window, on top of the bookease, behind the pictures, and up at the ceiling—as old (gentlemen will do in such cases, ana finally gave up the search in despair. He was looking for bis pectacles.

Upou the desk in front of Mr. Brown lay a square note, which Mr. Brown wantod to read. He could have read it without his spectacles, with some difficulty, bit his temper having been thorough'y aroused, he scorned to give in and so he sank back into his chair with a red face, and stared at the note vindictively, and probably would have remained thus until he brought on a fit had he not chanced to pass his fingers frantically through the scanty fringe of hair on the top of his head, and there, of course, he found bis spectacles.

You o«m imagine in what a frame of mind he opened the square note. As he did so the door-bell rang—a vigorous, determined ring it was—but Mr. Brown heard it not, and was buried in the note. "THKOPHILUS BROWN, ESQ,—I have the honor to ask vou for the hand of your daughter Isabel. We have known and loved each other since ohlldron, and you can not be una ware of our attachment, which I hope yoa regard with favor. You are acquainted with my position lu life and need not waste wottlM iu assuring you that her future is safe In my hands. I will call to-morrow for an answer. Your affectionate nephew. "WALTKRHAYMAN."

You remember that the door-bell rang. The ringer stood upou the upper step, and whistled while he waited. \V ueu the servant came to the door he was handed a very limp and soiled card, embellished with two ink spot.-, and some bread-crumbs, on which was written, in beautiful script,

JAMBS BROWN BARTLUM.

The servaut looked at the card and then at the giver, and was plainly astonished. A young man of twenty-eight perhaps, most decidedly handsome, and most undeniably seedy hair glossy black, aud in need of the shears a jaunty mustache and a three days' beard on his face large, bright, and bold eyes, and a straight, slim figure, rather tall. This handsome young man wore upon bis glossy head a sun-burned straw hat with a chewed edge, on his back a very tight aid shiny Prince Albert coat, wnereupon every button was missing, their place being supplied with various sized pins bis legs wee lvered with very Daggy and wrinkled tronsers of •nuflf colored cassimere, while his feet incased in a pair of Congress gaiters that were so patched anr1 tied with strings, and so run down and over, and burst in so many places, that it seemed a miracle that thoy did not fall to pieces upon being looked at.

Tho young man bore the scrutiny of the twrvitor with easy good-nature, fingering his mustache the while, and teemed so self-possessed that Jobu Thorns, who at first had but one mind, and that to shut the door in his face, began to have his doubts.

You wish to see—" he began, hesita-

tl"*Mr*.

Tbeophilus Brown." said Mr.

James Brown Bartlum, suavely. "Yes. Take him that card, my good man, and I will wait an answer. Stay! On second thoughts, lead on, and I will follow.**

The man was too bewildered to proU«t: besides, he was new to the house, and although he felt that his situation was trembling in the balance, he meek{y uio?ed toward th© library* followed bv »he presumptuous stranger. *Mr. Brown has just finished reading his nephew's note for the third time as the servant entered and laid the card on the desk, and he had just time to glance at It, when the young man with the miraculous shoes seised his hand. "The same old man!" he cried, joy* full v: "not changed a bit! Age can not sule nor time wither an ounce of Theoph! Bless your heart, sir, bow glad I am to see yot I How do yon do?

Mr. Brown snot up from his chair tike a rocket, impurpled with rage, and absolutely glared at the intruder. «. Who—what—what does this mean ?n be roared, while John Thomaa fled for his life. "Who are you, sir and what do you waatf" ••"who am 1?" repeated the other, in apparently grwat wonder. "Well, upon my word, this i* humiliating indeed! Not remember me I Are ws. then, indeed, so noon forgotten when we are goneT Why, sir, I remember yon like a book." I

"Very likely," said Mr. Brown, fiercely '"but you haven't answered my question. Who are you, fir "I, sir," replied the intruder, making a hasty but ineffectual s-earch for a handkerchief, "am James Brown Bartlum— my card lies before you. In short, sir, I am your nephew." "Indeed said Mr. Brown, looking from the card to the owner, and eying both with considerable disfavor. "So yon are James?" "Yes, sir," said James, taking a chair, and composing himself Aerein with great care. "I aui lhe unfortunate young man of wboui you have no doubt heard a great many tales—" "And nothing good," said Mr. Brown sharply, sitting down with a bump. "I am sorry to h6ar it," rejoined Mr. Bartlum, with an air of great concern. "The breath of slander might have passed me by but no matter. To change the subject: it has been five years since I last saw you." "Yes." "You have not changed a particle, while I—well, I've seen the world, urcle." "Indeed, sir!'' "I have travelled from Hearts Content to San Diego, and been all things to all men. I have surprised myself by working at carpentry, driving a stage, and editing a paper, all inside of six months. Idined at the Palace Hotel in Frisco with the Corean Embassy one day, aud exactly thirty days from that date I was in Virginia City, sawing wood for dinner. You never sawed wood, uncle?" "Never!" "You wouldn't like it neither did I but a man must eat, uncle." •'There is no danger," said Mr. Brown dogmatically, "of any man starving, if he will work." "Humbug, my dear sir!"' cried Mr. Bartlum, cheerfully. "Don't you believe it. I have tried it, and I know. Besides, a man needs clothes and a roof over bis bead in addition to his daily bread. The world is very big, uncle, but it seems to be all pre-empted by some one else, I have knocked all around the American pat of it, and here I am back where I started, returning to my native city, and spending the first night in the station- house." s? "In the station-house!" A "As a lodger, sir. Don't be alarmed, sir your nephew is poor, but strictly honest. Through many trials he ha? never done enytbing worse than sawing wood. Your spoons are perfectly safe, sir." "Then, sir," said Mr. Brown, sternly, 'perhaps you will condescend to tell me just what you want."

Mr. James Bartlum arose, and stood before his uncle like a statute. Mr. Brown looked at him from bead to foot, and noted in detail every article of his raiment, until his eyes became rivited on the Congress gaiters, and these proved too much for bim. "It is very humorous," said Mr. Bartlum, smiling easily at bis uncle's unbounded mirth, "and I have often enjoyed them myself. 1 am quite a cartoon, I know, and if I were wearing these clothes lor fun, I don't know but I should see the funny side more fre-

Mr. Brown suddenly checked himself and became grave.

"Sit

down," he said.

'I beg your pardon. You are in need of -of clothes?" "Everything—clothes, money, a place to sleep, friends." "Why did you come to me? -j "Why does the drowning man seize a straw "What claim have you on me?" .•/ "None—only that we are of same blood. Understand me, sir. I know you are not bound to support me. Let us forget our relationship for a moment. Consider simply that I am merely a starving man, ready and willing to do anything for a living, with not a chance, in ten thousand to get a situation. Consider that you are rich, never know what it is to go hungry to bed, and can count up ten thousand friends. Consider—" "Silence!" thundered Mr. Brown, in a great rage. "Do you suppose I am going to turn you out-of-doors Nothing of the sort. This house is yours, sir, as long as you behave yourself. You have been a vagabond, sir—you are a vagabond, sir, and I have no pity for your misfortunes. John will show you to my son's room. You remember George? Yon can make yourself presentable, I dare say." "Uncle, you overpower mel I expected nothing more than a dollar—and A kick*" '•Go, sir No more of your shameful levity. You shall pay me for this, sir, never fear. Throw away those shapieful clothes, sir and burn your shoes, sir—burn tnem!"

Mr. Bartlum was a rapid dresser, but when he returned, inside of thirty minutes, bathed, shaven, and attired in George Rrown's best suit of black, his uncle had vanished so be planted himself in his vacant chair, possessed himself of a book, and made himself comfortable. Hardly had he done so when the door flew open and a very dark young man and a very fair young woman rushed in and almost fell upon him. "On, sir!" cried the young man and the young woman in a breath and then they paused and looked at each other in evident trepidation, while Mr. Bartlum regarded them In mild surprise.

At length the girl said, in a disappointed tone: We thought you were older than you are. Didn't we, Walter?" ".»Iuch older," assented Walter, decisively. "I regret to say," said James, gravely, "that I am not older than I am. But let that pass. What is the matter, my children?" "Well, sir— Yon tell him, Walter." "Wall, sir, we wish to tell you the truth of this affair." "Stay!" interposed James. "Is this a secret?* Because, i( it is, you had better keep it. I am a stranger to you both." "We know it," cried Walter, eagerly "but that makes no difference. I insist upon you hearing it." "Oh, very welll'' said Mr. Bartlum, resignedly "since you insist, fire away!"

Walter took his companion's hand in his, and began in a very manly tone: "Sir, we nave known each other ever since we were six years old." "Six years old,'' said Mr. Bartlum, with a judicial air. Very good!" "Chat is, I was six, ana Isabel was three. We have never been separated for more than a year, and have grown to love each other—I may say ardently. Within the last month or two Uncle Brown has noticed oar Intimacy, and questioned Isabel about it. She confessed all. He then flew Into a violent rage —be is very violent at times—* fi "Yea, I know be ia.M «»—aod actually swore at her, and forbade me the house. To-day I wrote him a note, making a formal offer for Isabel's band, and I was to come to-morrow for an anawor, but Isabel beard you were coming—", "Indeed!" sSt "—and we determined to make an appeal to yoa. Ia the first place, let me ask yoa If I have acted wrongly la any way?" "No!" said Mr. Bartlum, looking at Isabel with considerable admiration "yoa have acted qaite right. Yoa

TERRE HAUTE SATURDAY EVENING MAIL.

couldn't help it." ••Then, t*lr," exclaimed Walter, "we appeal to you. Make an effort to soften Uncle Brown. It's only a crotchety whim of bis, and you have such in fiuence over him: you are bis adviser—' "Hold bard!" cried James. "I suspected all along that you were in the wrong box, but yoo would come in. Permit me, before this goes any further. Who do you think I am "Ferguson, of Ferguson A Board, lawyers," ciied Walter and Isabel, in a breath. "You're mistaken my name is James Bartlum, your cousin, from—well, sajr California. Just arrived Mils morning,"" "Oh, Walter," cried Isabel, with a gasp, "what have we done?" "We are ruined," said Walter, tragically. "Wait a bit," said Mr. Bartlum, soothingly. "Don't break down all at once, 1 am getting interested in this affair* 1 am always on the side of youth and love, old as I am. Now that I know all, per haps I can help you more than Ferguson. Don't say anything to Ferguson don't appeal to him. A man witn that kind of a name is apt to be flinty-heart-ed. Trust to your cousin James."

Ob, Cousin James!" cried Isabel, convinced at once, "bless you! You have made us feel so happy!" "Bless you, sir!" echoed Walter, also very much affected. "All right," rejoined Cousin James, drylv. "A brilliant and, let us hope, feasible plan has occurred to me, which for the present I shall keep in the inner recesses of my bosom. Will yoa trust implicitly to me "Implicitly," cried Walter. "Very well. Then—you travel out of the house." "What!" "Go! aud when you come back tomorrow for an answer to your note, and Uncle Brown'says 'No,' which he undoubtedly will, submit quietly." "Give up Isabel Never!" "For a time, young man—for a time! Be a diplomat© and trust to me." "Yes, do, Walter," pleaded Isabel. "I am sure yeu can trust him." "Now, then," said Cousin James, when the ardent lover bad torn himself away, "you are very young, and you are a female, but you look sensible. Can you keep a secret "Yes." "I'll try you. Please sit down."

When Mr. Tbeophilus Brown returned from his search for the recreant Ferguson, he opened his blue eyes very wide on seeing his daughter and the extramp enjoying a very lively tete a tete. "Cousin Isabel and I," said James, with a smile, "are excellent friends already.. I confess I did not remember her when she came in. Everybody has changed in five years except Uncle Theoph." "Humph," growled Mr. Brown, not altogether admiring this familiarity, but yet compelled to admit that his nephew was evidently presentable.

Within a week Mr. James Bartlum had taken the Brown mansion by storm. Mr. Brown was a widower, and since George bad gone away the dinners had been rather lonesome, but Cousin James changed all that. An interminable talker, with a knowledge of men and manners gained in a school to which Mr. Brown and his guests were entire strangers, and a perfect mint of anecdote and chitchat, the young man entertained his uncle's guests In a most surprising manner. Mr. Brown was vastly amused when be pictured the consternation of his guests did they but know his nephew's antecedents, which ho wisely decided to keep to himself, and then he told himself that his nephew was an educated gentleman, notwithstanding bis scampish adventures.

Isabel was completely captivated, to the intense and growing wrath of Walter. He had religiously kept his promise, and after leingrefused Isabel's hand as anticipated, baa been kindly allowed to make an occasional call, on each and every occasion only to fina Isabel "not at home."

To the opera with Mr. Bartlum out riding with Mr. Bartlum here, there, everywhere with Mr. Bartlum, until Walter was reduced to skin and bone, and began to suspect that he was being duped. Once or twice at dinner he had essayed to communicate with his beloved, but the attempts were always failures. Either Mr. Brown had his eye on him, or, as most frequently happened, Cousin James engaged him in spirited conversation until the opportunity had gone by.

After this sort of thing had been going on two entire months, the young lover had worked himself into such a fever that he made up his mind to have an explanation, or—well, anything!

The opportunity came the very next week at ay ball. After some little manoeuvring he ran the faithless couple to earth in a bay-window. "Isabel," said he, trying very hard to be calm, "I have a right, and I do demand an explanation/' 'An explanation, Walter?" said Isabel, the innocent, inquiring tone very effectually calculated to madden the average man. "Gracious heavens!" exclaimed Walter, very effectually maddened, "is it possible you affect ignorance? Do you think I am blind? Faithless Isabel, had I not seen with my own eyes—" "Don't talk so loud." interposed the faithless James, soothingly. 'Don't you talk to me," exclaimed Walter, passionately. "I'll have a settlement with you, sir, at another time and place." "One moment," said Cousin James, ccolly. "Permit me to remove the lady from the scene of strife."

Before Walter could interpose, they were gone, and before he could leave the window, bis faithless friend had returned and taken him by the arm like a school-boy. "Young man," he said, with a patronising air, "yoo are making a donkey of yourself. After making allowances for your youth and inexperience, I can not close my* eyes to the fact that you are something of an idiot." "I won't be talked to in this way," said Walter, savagely. "Oh, yes. you will. It Is for your own good, my dear boy. Everything is going along very nicely, and If you will only keep quiet—" "But I will not. I have been shamefully deceived, and unless Isabel explains everything to my satisfaction 111 do something." "What will you do?" "I don't know" (gloomily0 "Dont do anything rash." "Yea, I will. I'll expose you." ••To whom

MTo

everybody. To-to Uncle Brown!" Mr. Bartlum was panic-strickea at this announcement. 'Wretched young man! yoa wouldn't dare." "Wouldn't I said Walter, wfth a dark frown. "You'll sea. I am not to be trampled on with impunity. If I am a worm, I can turn."

With this dark and significant tkreat he burnt away, in spite of the oth«*r*« efforts to restrain him. and was *«sa in the supper-room shortly afterward eatluojmn with a determined air.

The next day, about tear in the ifternoon, aa James and laabat were tearing

the bouse for a dtive, John Thomas accosted them with a message from Mr. Brown, wfyo would be pleased to see tbem in the library. "Cousin James!' cried Isabel, in great trepidation, "all is discovertd." "So it would appear," said Cousin James, tranquilly "and there is nothing else to do than to face the music like little men. Come along, cousin."

Mr. Brown was seated in his chair of state, and at a little distance sat Master Walter, looking Very pale and rather sheepish.

When the couple entered, Mr. Brown laid his band upon a dictionary, as if he bad half determined to knock somebody down, but changed his mind and said, with an assumption of irony that became him very ill, "What a charming pair! Ha! Ha! Yes quite beautiful!" "Anything wrong, sir?" inquired James, with exasperating mildness. "You know you are not careful in your diet." "Deit!" roared Mr. Brown, coming out strong as the old original Brown—"diet, sir! Confound your impudence, sir! Do you mean to try to humbug me? Do you mean to attempt to deceive me? Don't trifle with me—I know all.'? "Tell us then." "You—are a villain, sir." "I deny it." a .- "You are—an ungrateful villain, have warned a serpent in my bosom." "Meaning me, sir?" "Yes, you. Oh, I shall not spare you! You have basely gained the affections of my daughter—wretched girl i" "Oh, papa!" "Go away. I have been blind, but now I see.'' "I suppose," scornfully, "that Mr. Hayman assisted your eyesight "He did—aud quite properly, too." "Mr. Hayman is an Interested party, I believe. He has aspirations—" "Never you mind, sir," what he has. I am talking about you now. You are aged, I suppose

Not quite.' Indeed! I wonder at that! But the affair has gone far enough, at any rate, and I tell you plainly, sir, that it must stop—and now." "Mr. Brown—" "I won't listen to a word." "But you must, you unreasonable old man. Let me sum up the situation. You have a young and lovely daughter with whom a worthy young man is madly in love." '•Worthy young man!" cried Walter, fiercely. "Do you hear that, uncle?" "I was referring' to Mr. Walter Hayman," said Mr. Bartlum, with a bland look at the speaker, "who is in every way exemplary. You refuse this worthy young man your daughter's hand, and why? Becauae he is worthy? Evidently. Well, here am I, a most unworthy young man, and you entertain an equally strong objection to me. How inconsistent! If this worthy young man is-eligible, I am out of the question but if he is out of the question, why not take me? You surely do iiot intend to make a »oa of Isable."

Mr. Tbeophilus Brown was evidently staggered by this remarkable piece of reasoning,and look alternately at the worthy and unworthy riva'*,and finally at the fair Isabel.

Oh, papa!" pleaded the bone of contention, "cnoose for me, please. You do not know bow distracted I am."

She loves them both" murmured her father, heiplessely, Isabel!" exclaimed Walter, imploringly. "Respected sir," said James, plscldly, the decision rests with you. You are the

judge

all in." Walter," cried Mr. Brown, with great vehemence—"a thousand times Walter!"

The worthy young man and his betrothed were locked in a fervent embrace, while Mr. Brown smiled beneficently upon them. "May a couBin's blessing rest upon you!" said James.

Mr. Brown look at him savagely, then keenly, and then, us he met his calm tnd unflinching gaze, said, sharply, "You take it coolly, sir."

By way of answer the handsome vagabond closed his left eye very slowly and looked at Mr. Brown in silence. An unmistakable wink.

In an instant the old gentleman saw through the trick, but before he could open nis«mouth the arch-schemer laid his hand on his arm, and pointing with his thumb to the absorbed young lovers in the comer, said, in a low town: "Permit a graceless vagabond, sir, to treasure in his mind the through that be has brought two loving souls together, and taugnt a fine old gentleman to know his own mind. You will never regret it, sir, and just reflect what might have been had your girl really thrown away her affections. Do you see the point

Mr- Brown, after a moment's hesitation- grasped the other's hand fervidly, and acknowledged that he did.

"J WON'T OO HOME." Lafayette Journal. There wai an exciting scene at one of the skating rinks a few evenings ago, the parties to it being a young married man, of this place, and bis wife, both conspicuous figures in the best social circles. The husband dropped into the rink at about ten o'clock, and leaning over the handrail, moodily watched the gay gliders on the floor until his eye caugnt the figure of his wife. As she passed bim he called to her. "Come into the cloak room I want to speak to you," he said as she stopped.

She glided in the direction and as she aat down on one of the benches, be suddenly dropped on bis knees and unfastened her skates. She protested, but be paid no attention, and when be removed the rollers said: "Where is your cloak check

She had it in her hand and shut her fingers tightly over it. Her husband grasped her wrist, and with considerable difficulty straightened her fingers and released the check. Holding her cloak 4ie forced her to put it on. "Now come home," he said. "I won't come home," she replied, her cheeks flushing and eyes snapping. "Either come home with me at once," said the angry husband, "or stay here altogether.

A tearful scene followed, which ended in her finally following him out. The episode was witnessed by a number of people, and caused a good deal of talk.

"When your father and your mother forsake you, Johnny, do you know who will take vou up?" "Yes, sir," said be. "And who?" said the friend. The police," was Johnny's answer. Parents will do well to oonsider the truth there ia in this reply. The parent who is too much engaged, or too selfish, to look after the tndning of his child, need not be surprised to see the child come to serious harm.

Beware of Imitations, pretended cures

Take onlyciunt's [Kidney and liver] Remedy. Hunt's [Kidney and Urv] Remady has been need over thirty years, and Mved thousands from lingering disease aad death.

'A GOOD CUP OF COFFEE Philadelphia News. "It is one of the simplest things in the world," said Miss Corson in herlecture yesterday afternoon, "to make a good cup of

flee, and this can easily be ac

complished by applying a little common sense. If you put boiling water on coffee, and do not let it boil." she continued, "you have all the good qualities pen-erred. One reason dyspeptics cannot drink coffee is because it is boiled. Tbe style of coffee pot is just a mat ter of fancy. I have made as good coffee from an old tomato can as I nave ever sipped from a cup filled from tbe finest French coffee urn. We should take lessons in this matter from the Turks and Arabians, who grind their coffee to a fine power. "When the coffee is ground as find as possible, put it in a little bag of unbleached muslin, which should be tied tightly enough to prevent tbe escape of the grounds. If you use a cup of un* ground coffee you can make over a quart of very strong, black coffee. In making coffee many peoplfe sacrifice flavor for strength. Bitterness comes from boiling. When boiling water is placed on tbe bag of ground coffee it should stand at least three minutes before serving. Remember, the longer it stands the stronger it becomes. Be careful not to allow «the watered coffee to boil. "A favorite mixture of coffee," said Miss Corson, in answer to a lady in tbe audience, "is Mocha and Java, in the proportion of two parts of the latter, which is lesB expensive, to one of the former."

The distinguished U. S. Senator from Indana, Hon. Daniel W. Voorhees, certifies that in a case of rheumatism in the back, be obtained instaneous relief from St. Jacobs Oil. He says it is a remerkable remady. •fl *ti.A

FIFTY YEARS AOO AND NOW. O. W. Limer, in the Danbury News, gives home statistics by way of comparison, which are not only interesting but suggestive. He says: "Fifty years ago calico was twenty-five cents per yard, now five cents broadcloth from 95 to$6 a yard Kebtucky jeans seventy-five cents, now tweuty-five, and about as cheap then as now. Then tbe women spun the yarn and wove the cloth: then it went to the carding machine, was pulled, colored, made ready to make into clothes, the tailor cut the garments and tbe seamstress made the clothes and had from twenty-five to fifty cents a day and work from twelve to fourteen hours each day. The farmers did not go to tbe store and get ready-made clothing they believed in home manufactures. fifty years ago one could have a decent burial for ?6, now |50 is very cbeap then a coffin would cost $5 few but paupers use coffins now then caskets were not in fashion then people thought God was no respecter of persons, apparently they think He will respect the coffin now, especially if a costly monument mark the grave. These few items suggest the tbonght that some one rules. It is not cotton, neither is it corn it is some one from over the sea and its name is Fashion" and it rules with a rod of iron."

A rr-T|

KINDLING WOOD.

and jury, and the evidence is

8PUT FIND FOR THE KITCHEN FIRE, f, To spoil steak, Fry it.

A good meat for tramps cold shoulder. Cut warm bread or cake with a warm knife.

To spoil pancakes, bakd them on a lukewarm griddle. To spoil a breakfast, grumble all the while you are eating.

To spoil potatoes, let them lie and soak in w^ter after boiling. Fish "may be scaled much easier by dipping into boiling water about a minute.

To spoil bread, use poor flour and sour yeast and let it rise until to light and it runs over.

A tablespoonful of vinegar in the pot will make tough meat or chicken tender. If you wish to pour boiling hot liquid into a glass jar or tumbler it can be safely done by first putting a spoon in the

A SKILFUL N URSE. "f As an instance of the tact of trained nurses, an illustration is cited of a younjjf man who was sick in New York. He and his attendant thought be was dying and sent word to bis parents to come to him. After they had arrived the doctor feared the shock of seeing tbem would kill hin. How shall we break tbe news of their arrival to him? was the question. "Leave that tome," said tbe nurse. See bow skillfully she did it "Would you like to see your father and mother?" she ask the boy. He whispered a faint" yes." "I'll send for them," said she. This, after they had come. Halt an hour later she awakened him from a doze and said: "They are on the way." The boy smiled, and in a minute was unconsciouse again. In another half hour the nurs tuid they had come, and brought them in. The boy thought two or three days had slipped by in that hour which the nurse had employed in preparing bim for seeing them. He picked up, and is now at home ahd almost well.

ILLUSTRATION OF FAITH. In a sermon in Pittsburgh, Pa., the Rev. Mr. Moody said: "A Sunday school teacher tried to illustrate tbe free grace of salvation by offering his watch to the members of his class. They each one refused it till be came to the smallest boy. He took it ard put it in bis jocket. 'Thank you, my boy,' he said.

You have shown that you have faith in me. Keep it and take care of it.' 1 be other boys were surprised and, too late, were sorry they bad not taken tbe freely offered gift. They didn't believe him, that was tbe trouble."

ECONOMY IS WEALTH. A farmer and his wife went to a dentist's.

How much do vou charge for fillin' teeth?" ashed tbe farmer, "From $2 to$5." j9*' "An'bow much for pullin?" ,, "Fifty cents." "Martar," he said, turning to his wife, "you'd better get it pulled."

JUST as a lover bad dropped on his knees and began popping tbe question, a pet poodle, who thought the proceedings rather strange, made a dash for him. With remarkable nerve for a woman, tbe girl reached over, seized the

Kby

the neck, and, at tbe same time,

vJmly uttered: "Go on, George, dear, I'm listening to what yoa are saying."

Dr. Pieroe's Pellets —the original "Little liver Pills"rsugar-ccatod)—care aJck and bilious beadacbe, eour stomach, and bilions attacks. By druggist.

CHILDREN'S CHA TTER.

'-Gran'ma," said a boy of nine years,,, '•how old are vou "About sixty-six,'* said tbe grandmother. "You'll die soon —won't you, gran'ma, "Yes, dsar I expect to." "And when I die, gran'ma, can I be buried side of you?" "Yes, dear," said she, as her heart warmed toward the little one, whom she foldod. closer in her arms. "Gran'ma," softly? whispered the little rogue, "gimme ten cents." "Mamma," inquired Bobby, "do onlyf*good little Doys go to heaven "Yes, dear." "And bad little boys go to the bad" place?" "Yes" "I'm a good little boy, ain't I "Sometimes, Bobby, and sometimes you are quite a bad little boy." "Then I s'pose I'll have to spend part of tbe time in one place and part of the time in the other!"

A little girl who has been as carefully trained in the matter of reverence for sacred things as a minister's child could be, had been told that God was- everywhere, was with her night aud day, outdoors and in doors, and she seemed to understand it, But on one occasion her little pet dog was following her closely when she didn't want him with her. She stopped as she was about to go through a door and said with great em-

Fts

hasis: "Now, Ponto, you go back bad enough to have God tagging round after me everywhere without having you." And she slammed tbe door, shutting from her view the horror stricken face of her pious mother.

r¥'

BEAUTIFUL WOMEN

are made pallid and unattractive by functional Irregularities, Which Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription will infallibly cure. Thousands of testimonials. By druggist.

The lawyer wljo obtained |4,500,000 alimony for the divorced wife of Senator Fair bas had to sue that lady for

of $50,000.

hiB

fee

When the system is weakened through debility or other cause, a strong tonic? medicine is what is needed. James Donagby, of Zanesvill, Ohio, writes: "This is to certify that I have been suffering from general debility and loss of appetite for more than three months. Hearing of the wonderful curative properties of Misbler's Herb Bitters I tried three or four bottles and am entirely cured."

Three Georgia weeklies are edited by women.

A Remarkable Escape. Mrs. Mary A. Dailey, of Tunkhannock, Pa., was afflicted for six years with Asthma and Bronchitis, during which time the best physicians coula give no relief. Her life was despaired of, until in last October she procured a bottle of Dr. Kiug's New Discovery, when immediate relief was felt, and by continuing its use for a short time she was completely cured, gaining in flesh 50 lbs. in a few months. Free trial bottles of this certain cure of all Throat and Lung Diseases at Cook fe Bell's Drug Store. Large Bottles 91-00. -4-

Those are Solid Facts. The best blood purifier and system regulator ever placed withln(the reach of suffering humanity, trulj is Electric Bitters. Inactivity of the Liver, Biliousness, Jaundice, Constipation, Weak Kidney, or any disease of the urinary organs, or whoever requires an appetizer, tonic or mild stimulant, will always find Electric Bitters the best nnd only certain cure known. They act surely and quickly, every bottle guaranteed to give en-' iresatlsfactlon or money refunded. Sold at fifty centsa bottle by Cook A Bell. (4)

Bncklen's Arnica Salve. The Best Salve In the world for Cuts,Bruises, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Itheum, Fever Sores, Tetter, Chapped Hands, Chilblains, Corns, and all skin eruptions, and positively cures Piles, or no pay required. It is guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction, or money refunded. 26c per box. For sale by Cook A Bell. (tf.)

-A Prom

Safe Sure Care

For Itch In 80 minutes, with O Quick Curative for Itch. For sale by all Druggists. The trade Supplied by Cook A Bell.

O Quick Cnratlve For Itch. A PosltivefSafe Sure Cure In 30 minute*. Ask your druggists for it. For sale by all Druggists. The trade Supplied by Cook Bel). .»•

Glad They Used It.

Wabash Scratches, Scabies or Itch cured in 80 minutes, with O Quick Curative for Itch. For sale by all Druggists. The trade Supplied by Cook & Bell.

•TSSenTTr^ljetler^Tmn words." HUNT'S (Kidney, and Liver) RKMLKMY has saved from lingering disease nnd death, hundreds who have been given up by physician to die. "Time and tide wait for no man." HUNT'S (Kidaey and Liver) REMEDY cures all diseases of the Kidneys, Bladder, Urinary

:TqFAIL

•rgans, Dropsy, Gravel, Diabetes and Incontinence and Retentions of Urine.

"Strike the Iron whl.e it is hot"

HUNT'S (Kidney and Liver) REMEDY quickly induces the Liver to healthy action, removing the causes that produces Bilious Headache, Dlspepsla, Sour Stomach, Costl veness, Piles, Ac. "Honesty Is a strong staff to lean upon."

HONEST TESTIMONY.

'f Over 70 Years Old. Col. Benjamin 8. Hazard, of Warwick, R. I. over seventy years old, suffered for 15 years with a teiribfe kidney and bladder difficulty He was persuaded to try HUKT'S {Kidney and Liver] RKXKDT. In less than a week the excruciating pains left him and have never since returned. Mr. Hazard recommends HOST'S [Kidney ami Liver] RBMTO* to every one similarly afflicted, with the greatest confidence In its power to cure. "Use wealth generously."

School Teaeher.

Mr. H. L.Soper, principal of the High School at Poquonock, Ct., K1®: neys became weak and slaMssb.Kindlng relief in

HURT'S [Kidney and Uvert «•*-.

IDT, I continued it* use until I bad used four bottles, when I became well.

"Eoonomy Is the household mine."

Decided Benefit*

Mr. Hiram Franklin^ Naugatu^, Conn, contracted a disease flrutins AQV hdp« IflftlMtlCMOTt D# taking (Kidney amd Iiw] Sd S«S "tTli gave

gasiaar»a&saaaB

C.N. CBITTENTON, General A feat, *«w York.

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