Saturday Evening Mail, Volume 3, Number 13, Terre Haute, Vigo County, 28 September 1872 — Page 1

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Martha Hopkins

A BALLAD OF INDIANA.

From the kitchen, Martha Hopkins, as she stood there making I»'e* ... Southward look*. along the turnpike, with her hittid above her eyes Where along the distant hillside, her year-

Ung heifer feed«,

And a little gross Is growing In a mlgnty

sight of weed*

All the air Is full of noise, for there Isn't any school, AD1 boys, with turm-d-up pantaloons, are wading In the pool. Blithely frisk unnumbered chickens, cackling, for they cannot laugh, Where the airy sum in its brighten, nimbly leaps the little culf. Gentle eyes of Martha Hopkins! tell me, wherefore do you gaze On the ground that's bring furrowed for the planting of the maize Tell me wherefore down the valley ye have trac«i the turnpike way. Far beyond the cattle pasture, and the brickyard with its clay

Ah the dogwood tree may blossom and the dooryard green may shine. With the tears of amber dropping from the waslrlngon the line, And the morning's breath of balsam lightly brush b^r freckled ch^k little recketh Martha Hopkins ol the tales of spring they speak.

When the sumpjer's burning solstice In the scanty harvest glowed, She hnd watched a man on horseback riding down the tilrnplke road. Many time* she saw him turning, looking backward quite forlorn, Till amid the trees she lost him in the shadow of the barn.

Ere the supper time was over, he had passthe kiln of brick, Crossed the rushing yellow river, and forded quite a creek, And his flat-boat load was taken at the time for pork and beans, With the traders of the Wabash to the wharf at New Orleans. Therefore watches Martha Hopkins, holding In her hands the pans, When tlie sound of distant foot-steps seems exactly like a man's. Not a wind the stove-pipe rattles, not a door Iwrhlml her Jars, •But she seeins to hear the rattling of his letting down the Oars. Often sees she men on horseback, coming down the turnpike rough, But they caine not as John Jackson, she can tell it well enough Well she knows the sober trotting of the sorrel horse he keeps, As he Jogs along at leisure with his head down like a sheep's.

She would know hltn 'mid a thousand, by his home-made coat and vest Uy Ills socks, wl.lch were blue woolen, such as farmers wear out west By the color of his trowsers, and the saddle, which was spread, With a blanket which was taken for that purpose from the bed.

None like he the yoke of maple, on the unbroken steer could throw.

None

amid his father's cornfields used like him tl'espade and hoe And at all the apple cuttings few Indeed the men are seen That can dance with him the polka, touch with liliu the violin,

He has said to Martha Hopkins, and she ill I II Its she hears him now, Cor shti knows as well can be that he meant to keep his vow, When the buckeye tree has blossomed, and your uncle plants his corn jKhn.ll the bells of Indiana wslier In the wedding morn? He pictured his relations, and her Sunday hat and gown, And he thinks he'll get a carriage, and they'll spend a day In town That their love will newly kindle,and what comfort it will give To sit down to the first breakfast in the cabin where they'll live. Tender eyosof Martha Hopkins what has got you In such a scrape? Tls a U*ir that falls to glituir on the ruffle of her cape. Ah, the eye of love may brighten, to be certain what It sees, One man looks much like another, when half hidden by the trees.

Hut her eager eyes rekindle, she forgets the pie* and bread, As she soos a man on horseback round the corner of the shed Now tie another apron, get the comb and smooth your hair, *Tis the sorrel horse that gallops, tls John

Jackson's self that's there.

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Town-Talk.

THK rOMTICAI. ITL'H

la an awful disease. It la getting to be quite common too. It is wore® than the "seven yoar" kind, liocause the afflicted like It, and ao, Instead of betaking themselves to brimstone ointment nt once for a cure, they let tlie disease Increase upon them till nothing less than tho brimstone fumigation taught by the orthodox will do any good, and that will be of benefit only as a warning to others. Nothing makes a man tuore contemptible in the eyes

of decent people, a source of greater discomfort to them, or leads to meaner deeds than.thls sfme political itch. It la no sin to hold office, no sin to want office. But when a man gets a constant itching for office, which leads him to scratch himself by every possible means, he is in a dreadfully bad way. «All candidates fyr office have not the ^political itch, but a good many have,

land so have a good many who are not

VC- ^candidates. There is T. T's old friend Jones, he »ever had an office In his life, not even a nomination. Hut there never was an office to be filled trom Constable to (Senator, for which he did not irnpor--tune T. T. and other Influential citizen*, to use their influence in his be-

J»alf. He is dreadfally uncomfortable himself because he cannot get an office, and he makes his friends unf*" ^comfortable because they cannot help »&>-• ihlm, though they would be glad to do so

Then the way these fellow* take to maks themselves comfortable with this disease shows how uncomfortable they Are, and is a constant source of dlaoomifbrt to the public generally.

When ft fellow gets it real bad be 4 jwill do almost ahy thing, and go almost where to bcHitoh himself, The US: Ife

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other day T. T. was going along Main street in a great hurry, thinking about—no matter what—when his hand was suddenly grasped, and shaken with such warm—rather, hot cordiality that he at first thought somebody had mistaken him for a long lost sen or brother. Coming to his senses be soou found that it was the candidate for—no matter what office. Said candidate, before he becama a candidate, never manifested any such strong affection forT. T. or such tender solicitude for the old gentleman and lady whom T. T. once honored by permitting them to br.ng said T. T. upon the stage of action. The fact is the fellow had the political Itch and it made hitn uncomfortably anxious about the health, and general condition, every body's parents, wives, children, and in fact the whole race. It must be dreadful to be borne down with such a burden of anxiety about every body's friends, and be obliged to stop to enquire after the whole list. This is the way they scratch themselves. T. T. don't like to bo the post for such business, especially when he is lu a hurry. Not long since T. T. found himself surrounded on the sidewalk by a whole crowd of these fellows, and there they just rubbed themselves against him, with all manner of inquiries, stories, jokes, etc. If any of the readers of The Mail find that a man all at once becomes painfully polite, touching his hat when he never did it before, eager to shake hands and holding on to the hand a long time, while inquiries come thick and fast about every thing in which said reader is interested, or is supposed to be interested, he may just set it down that that fellow has the political itch. You may not catch It from him, but he will scratch himself on you. That is what he is doing by bis hat lifting, hand shaking, and anxious questions.

This politcal Itch Is dangerous. When one gets so awfully uncomfortable as this makes those who have it, they will go any where for comfort. Only one class of people are safe when they get the political itch, and that is those who are already as low as they can be.

There was Dick formerly a very good fellow, not much of a lawyer, but doing a good honest real estate and insurance business. He caught the political itcd, went into bad company, got the run of the saloons, told low stories,—In short, scratched himself against any thing that came to hand, and he is just going down hill at a trot. He don't know it, but his face tells the truth. He drinks. He has lost his interest in every thing good. He lounges around the newspaper office, is treatod politely by the editor at his face but denounced behind his back as an "infernal bore." His friends pity him. Kulned by the political itch was Dick B. and so area good many others.

Take a real mean fellow, one accustomed to low society and pursuits, and the political Itch sometimes does him good. He, too, will go any where and do any thing, and so he sometimes gets into good company, and does a good thing. There was Jauk H., who had no higher ambition than to sell whisky and have a weekly flgbt. He got the political itch. Ho wanted votes. He tried to be respectable, and get decent men's votes, and ho teally did improve. Morrissey is mean enough now, but he is not half as low as he was before he started for Congress. Give a low-bred fellow the political itch real bad, and if there are any respectable people whose votes he wants, he very likely will improve.

The political itch sometimes gets men into very ludicrous positions. T. T. took advantage of the cheap train to go to Indl-mapolis, Monday, and seo Greeley. Now T. T. thinks Greeley a good man—perhaps not a magnetic needle in his principles, but a good man, and one who would make a very fair president. Ho, too, Dan Voorhees is a first-rate lellow, a gentleman in every sense of the word. But it did look funny to see H. *. and Din scratching each other over there.

They have scratched each other before, but not in this way. They just rubbed themselves together as if it felt good. It is all right, no doubt, but it did look queer. Wonder If It felt queer? But there is so much ol this in these days that it will not seem strange long. For an Instance on the other aide, (T. T. means to be honest, though it is a mighty hard thing to do in these days) take the Express and the Irishmen. Is'nt it funny to see them playing at "tickle me and I'll tickle you," '••cratch me—gently—and I'll scratch yon—gently." These are caaea in which the political Itch simply works out funny results. These can be tolerated, tor there Is lHtle harm done. But T. T. advises his young friends,—and the advice is good for the "old ana" only they won't take it,—to keep clear of the political itch. If the city or state or nation wants your services, and you can afford it, go into office, but dont get to hankering after it. Don't gel the political itch, for it will mike a fool of you,—or wore*.

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Husks and Nubbins.

A USELESS SCIENCE.

Politics has been reduced to a science in these days, and it is a science which the country could do very well without. It is a very useless and expensive science. It is to be deplored as much as the use of tobacco: it costs and brings no benefit. A soience is valuable just in proportion as it ministers in some way or other to our happiness. This rule applied to politicians would place it on the debtor side of the social ledger, with no corresponding ci^dit. Thoreau struck the key-note to the true system of social science when he said: "They make their pride in making their dinner cost much I make my pride In making ray dinner cost little." Expense is not what we want, but result. In politics it is all expense and no result. Look at the vast outlay of labor and means which is being made in this Presidential contest milmillions of dollars will be required to cover it. Consider the expense of the campaign in our own single State—aye, in our own single city. What did the Logan demonstration cost What did the Voorhees demonstration cost And what is the gain of either?

It is hardly possible to conceive anything more utterly useless and profitless than the present mode of conducting politics. Every sensible man ought to be thoroughly disgusted with it no sensible man ought to touch a finger to it. For look at the matter. Our system of government requires every four years the selection of some citizen for President. Thecompensationoftheoffioefor the whole term is only a hundred thousand dollars. Yet a President is never elected but the people spend millions of dollars in the operation. And so, proportionately, with our State and county offices. And there is nothing more simple than the mode of choosing our officers. Each voter quietly throws a piece of paper, containing the name of the man he prefers, into a box, and the man who gets the most votes is elected. But in performing this simple operation the American people expend thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars! Could anything be more foolish?

I have said that politics is a science. Few people have any idea how much thought, how much energy, how much labor the canvass of a single State demands. A central committee is formed for the purpose of conducting the campaign. A convention is called and thousands of dollars are spent in securing the nominations for office. This is the foolishness oi candidates, not of the people. One would thinK that the main work was now done and that all would be quiet until the people decided at the polls which of the rival candidates should be elected. Butnotso. A hard, unprincipled struggle now begins between the two parties lor the capture of the coveted spoils of office. The opposing aspirants go all over the State. They speak every day and every night, everywhere. Each side decries the other, disparages its virtues, and exaggerates its faults each side exalts itself, covers up its vices, and promises everything that is nood each side distorts the truth, makes what is false appear ti^ie and what is true appear false. But all this might be suffered, for the people have only to go and hear the speeches and separate the false from the true. The evil does not end here, else the science of politics would be very incomplete. Now the people must turn In and help. Magnificent demonstrations must be gotten up. Uniforms and torches must be bought, and companies formed and drilled, great parades aud processions made. There must be banners and bands and enthusiasm. Here the science comes ID. One side must outdo the other. The side which carries the most flags and torches, hurrahs the most lustily and works th9 most vigorously is the side that will win. Why, only a few days ago, the leading official of a neighboring State told the writer that he believed Mainei would have beeu Democratic if the vote in that State had been taken three weeks before it was, and that the sixteen thousand Republican majority bad been made by the vigorous manner in which the campaign had been prosecuted within that time. Now, if this is true, it doee not speak well for the people of thia nation. It la not pleasant to think that men vote from the effect of noise rather than the convictions ol reason. We do not !ike to believe that the comrarnwealth of Maine haa Republican officials because Republican candidates spent the most money, made the most fuss and were the moat indefatigable in solicititing the people's votca. The man who is influenced in his vote by such circumstances aa these is not fit to vote at all.

The scientific politicians are happy when "our leading citls*na" tarn oat and carry torches in the processions. It shows that the people are awake to the Importance of the canvass. And it has come to psss that the citixen who

TERRE-HAUTE, SATURDAY EVENING, SEPTEMBER 28, 1872.

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refuses to pay out money for political meetings, or to march in the procesaion, is reproached for his lack of patriotism and indifference to the public good. As if, forsooth, a man cannot vote in October unless he parades and shouts dur1 ng August and September! I hope the time will come when no man will parade for political purposes, and when campaign uniforms will be as curious as revolutionary muskets. There is no use and no sense in the thing. One party only incites the other the torches in every precession are counted by the opposition, in order that they may be outnumbered in the next demonstration. One party will not be idle while the other is at work one party will not often be out-worked by the other. There is thus a mutual rivalry and a compulsion to campaign work. But what is the good? There are only so many votes and every man has a right to vote for the candidate or party which he preiers.

The short of it is, politics is a science we have no need of. As it is now the shrewd, tricky, unscrupulous politician generally comes in ahead of the statesman, because he is better skilled in this science of campaigning than his opponent. In a neighboring town, a couple ol years ago, an elderly gentleman of high social and profesiional standing, a man of irreproachable character and universally acknowledged ability, was nominated by his party for the State Legislature. Every one admitted the saperior qualifications of the candidate for the position, but he was beaten by an opponent who was in every respect his inferior. In every respect, did I say? No, he was better versed in the science of electioneering than his competitor, and the very quality which detracted from his fitness as a legislator was the identical quality which carried him to the Legislature. And the defeated candidate bore the blame and censure of his party because he did not work to secure his election. There is too much business made ofthe matter of selecting our rulers. The honest, sensible, intelligent men of the country ought to vote and refuse to do anything more than that. If the orators desire to go about and make speeches setting forth the principles held by the opposing candidates, let the people go out and hear them and decide in their own minds which policy promises best for the country, antl vote accordingly. But this thing of making the chief science of government consist in what is a mere accident of government, is opposed to reason and good sense. Away with labor and expense which brings no reward.

People and Things.

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Cotton-Eyed Joe" is a Kansas City local editor. &^ There ate three thousand Justices of the Peace in Tennessee.

It is easy finding reasons why other folks should be patient. There is a firm doing business in Milwaukee under the name of Friend A Brother.

Prof. Gunning, of New York, thinks the Niagara River has had an existence of only 250,000 years.

Dennet, of the Chicago Post, is in favor of imposing a special tax of $200,000 upon every liquor seller.

A leading clergyman of New York considers ritualism "merely a matter of candles and night-gowns."

A Lntheran minister—Dr. Muse—of Columbus, Ohio, refuses the sacrament to all persons belonging to secret societies.

Shakespoare mentions dogs 300 times in his plays and then only speaks of them with contempt. This must be admitted to be a spot on the sun.

The Japanese utilize their condemned. Two Yeddo policemen, sentenced to death for murder, were lately set up as targets on the Yeddo rifle range.

The Jewish Messenger suggests a new field for Stanley in the discovery ol the ten lost tribes of Israel. Then he might hunt up Morgan, the miaaing mason.

Enoch Jenkins, eleven miles from New Albany, Ind., was chief mourner at bis brother's funeral. He did not know it was loaded till he pulled the trigger, and then it was too late.

John Rathbun paraded a street in San Frajcisoo a few nights ago dressed in—well, he carried an umbrella. He had delirium tremens and gave the polloeman who caught him a hard run.

A Japanese scholar in one of the New Haven schools, having been insulted by a schoolmate, sent a note to the instructor requesting permission to kill the offender. And the professor is in a perplexing dilemma. If he doesn't give the Japanese youth permission to commit homicide the youth will be compelled to harikari himself. He doesn't know which is the biggest sin —murder or suicide. He'll probably take the opinion of some lawyer on the subject, they are so apt at deciding questions of conscieotloamep,

Sergeant Bates, who has a mania tor carrying the American flag around, is going to England to do it. If he would quit that nulaance and go to carrying a hod, people might have some respect for him.

The poor hydropathists have been treated to a very cold shower bath. A British savant has discovered that cold water is not a cure for rbeamatism, for whales have it, who live in cold water all the time.

Henry Conners of Rutland, Vermont, recently saved the life of a little child at the risk of bis own. The father (worth |75,000) asked the courageous man to take a glass of soda as a reward for saving his child

Feminiteois.

Mrs. Brown is lecwirlng^in Omaha on woman's work. Blnghampton, New York is doctored by five female physicians.

Germany has more exclusive colleges for young women than any other country.

Advice to young ladies: If you have taper fingers, mind you don't burn them.

Mrs. Stowe says that women go into the country to get a breathing spell from their servants. I

An exchange says you can tell a young lady's politics by the papers she uses to make her.bustle of.

That multitudinous person, Mrs. Brighatn Young, was recently shaken into hysterics by an earthquake

Mrs. D. P. Bowers, who is to be here shortly with her dramatic company, is doing well at the Chicago Academy.

Mrs. Dr. Clair R. DeEvere Spettigue, of Boston, has entered the lecture field to discourse on "Love and Marriage."

Somebody says "a wife should belike a roasted lamb, tender and nicely dressed." A scamp adds, "and without any sauce."

Edmonia Lewis, the negro sculptress, is located at Rome, and has so much work to do that she employs uine assistants.

A stage scream emanating from the actress, Miss Jean Clara Walters, scared a Salt Lake burglar so that he dropped her jewel box and watch, and fled.

Katie Putnam, a great favorite with our people, began an engagement at Fort Wayne Monday evening. She has been lo Europe since her last visit to this city

It is now said that the young lady who created an impression thatshe had flung herself off Niagara Falls for the love of George Clarke, ol Stratford, is alive and well. "Anna Dickinson makes her own engagements this season."—Ex. Well, why shouldn't she. She's old enough to make an engagement without asking her parents. *l-

A Fond du Lac giri picked forty-two bushels of hops in one day, went to a hop in the evening, got chuckful of tanglefoot, offered to fight any man, and went home mad as thunder because she couldn't get all the sport she wanted. Tfiis country does produce wonderful women.

Aladyjliving at Greenville,Massachusetts, disappeared suddenly from her home a few days ago, much to the grief of her husband and friends. They were comforted shortly afterward by receiving a letter Irom the lady stating that she had merely left home that she might be better appreciated by her family when she returned.

A New York broker was astonished upon returning home the other day, to find bis two daughters, both well up in their teens, sliding down the lower hall bannisters. His, ..astonishment was changed to indignation when the flushed damsels informed him that they In

tended

to try riding astride some day,

and were taking preparatory lessons.

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Princess Salm-Salin, well remembered oa the continent for her devotion to "poor Carlotta," haa become a convert to Catholicism, and, weary of fashionable life and the world's people, haa entered a convent in Inspruck, in the TyroL By birth she is an American. Her nime was Agnes Leclerq, and her life has been a romance. At one time she was a circus rider. She saved her husband's life in Mexico, and got him restored to his military rank in Germany. He was killed at Gravelotte, at the bead of hia regiment.

Miss Lottie Grant waa recently exhibited at the Tippecanoe (Indiana) County Fair as a specimen of the natural products of Wabash Valley. She is just eighteen years of age, and touches the beam with a No, 12 slipper at four hundred and eighty-two pounds, If she is related to the governing family, ahe is entitled to a fat office. The mission to Greece might correspond with her merits. It is stated that ber.extraordinary physical development is attributable to the constant use, when a child, of buttermilk as a beverage. She is now old enough and big enough to have her own

whey—[dn, Com.

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Price Five Centos

Connubialities.

AT THE HOP.'

"Yes, I'm here, I suppose you're delighted?* You'd heard I wus uot coming dowa! Why I've been here a week'—'rathers early'—

I know, but it's horrid in town. A Boston? Mast cmainly, thank you. This music Is perfectly sweet Of course I like danclug In summer,

It's warm, but I don't mind the heat— Xbe clumsy thing! Oh. bow lie hurt met I really can't dance any moreLet's walk—see they're forming a Lanclen

These square dances are such a liore. My elo^k, oh! I really don't ueetl It— Well, carry it—so, in the fluids— I hate It. but Ma made me bring it

She's frightened to death about colds. This Is rather cooler than dancing,

They're

iovely plaaaas up bere

Those lantern look sweet In the bashes. It's lucky the night Is so clear. I am rather tired—in this cornert-

Very well, if you like—I doo't. care— But you'll have to sit on the railing— You see there Is only one chair. 'So long since you've seen me —oh, agesr—

Let's see, why it's ten days ago— 'Seems years—oh! of oourse—don look Spooney.

It Isn't becoming, you know. How bright the stars .seem to-night, donlc they

What was it you said about eves How sweet—why you must be a poet— One never can tell till he tries. Why can't you be sensible, Harry!

I don't like men's arms on nay chair. Be still! i. you dou.'t stop this iHHiseuse, I'll get up sod leave you —so then-1 Oh! please don't—I don't want to hear It—

A boy like you talking of love •My answer!'—Well, sir, you shall have It—-» Just wait till I.get off my glove. See that?—Well, you needn look tragic,

It's only a solitaire ring.— I Ot course I am 'proud of It'—very— It's rather an elegant thing. Engaged !—yes—why, didn't yon know It?

I thought the news must have reached:..

Why, the wedding will lie in October— The 'happy manT-Charley Lee I ear. Now doa't blame me— I tried to stop you—

But you would go on like a goose I'm sorry it happened—forget Don't think of It—dont—what's the user There's somebody coming—doa't W»k—ao,

Get up -.1 lie railing again— \ru seem i^s if peued

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Can't \ru seem us it nothing hnd happened I never saw such geese as men Ah, Charley, you'ee found n»el A galop

The 'Balm frolT Yes take iny bouiuet— And mv fan If you will-now ready— You'll excuse me. of coursev Mr. tiray. —[Soribner for Ocl«heB. ,v

Music is the food of lave—beef and. mutton that of matrimony. What is the best thing to prevents* maid from despairing? Repairing.

An inventor has supplied a long felt,, want by inventing a gate hin^e strong: enough to support two kvec» s-uspend-ed by the aim-pits.

The young men of Ter»o-fcfciNto haveVl worn a "hole in a Bmssei» carpet witlk. their lwiees, andstill she isheart-whole. —[St* Louis Gl«be.

J. P., of Peekskill writes th# editor of the local sheet liat "youl nit your hed punched If you print La yur paper that my yf had twins. JV

Old anglers say that If you wish to catch a fine fish, you tmi»6 not throw your bait directly at him. Young ladies may take notice.

An elopement issaid to be nnknowo among the Laplanders. No man neetk ^4 fool around the wife of a Laplander expecting to land 'er in his lap.

The fashion is coming into vogue now at weddings, fer the groom, with bis "teat man" to go to tho church first and wait the appearance of the bride.

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Stanley wo«ld never havo gone to Africa, and consequently would never have found Livingstone, had Anna Ward, the actress, not jilted iilin and made hhn reckless. 'Tin love that makes the wrrld go round.

A reporter of the Missouri Democrat call a woiaan, who had buried lour husbands a "marital quadrilateral." Thia. is goOd, but why didn't he say a four cornered widow, and then everybody wpuld have understood him.

A man at a camp meeting boasted that be had been married twenty-five years, during which tiino ho had neve® given his wife a cross word or look* He omitted to say to his hearers that he dared not

the one nor the othsr.

A young lady who is receiving tho addresses of ono of oursprnciest clerks, was somewhat taken aback on Sunday night, when he suddenly flopped down on his knees, and drawlnga paper from his pocket, blushlngly read off his declaration of love.

Pere Hyaclntbe's apology for getting married Is very funny. Ho would on no account have the world think it waa because he was in love. Tie does not wish it said that the grand drama in which he has acted has ended in th* every-dav comedy and although ho fears that his example will "afflict ma» ny souls," still he rather advises thai his example should be followed.

The quickest yet is marriage by lightning. A young widower and widow out West took advantage of tho darkness and the back seat to make much love to each other, bnt a flash of lightning revealed the proceedings to the other occupants of the carriage, and they were immediately married to prevent gossip. What the lightning has put together, let no man put asunder.

There is a oertain bouse In Bra ail, In which five different families have lived and strange to say, everyone of these has lived nnhappy, and the husbands and wives have parted. There see ma to be a singular tstality about it. We will not name the place, as all henpecked husbands in town who wish to get rid of their wives would be tryinic to purchase the property.—[Bra«U Miner.

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