Saturday Evening Mail, Volume 3, Number 10, Terre Haute, Vigo County, 7 September 1872 — Page 2

LONELINESS.

The waning moon wasnp the stars Were faint, and very few, g| The vines about the window-sill

Were wet with falling dew ijttle cloud before the wind •.$

Was

drifting down the weat

I heard the moaning of the sea In its uftqulet rest: Until, I know not from what grief,

Or thought of other years, ,, The hand I leaned upon was cold, And wet with falling tears. 4-) fOverland Monthly.

Thespis^as a Vagabond.

'„54lSl

L-

BY J. COOPER VAIL.

In tbe good old days of onr grand sires, a man who could make eg-r dance, or chew tow and spit ribbon was set down by tbe illiterate as bav ing made a contract with tbe enemy of mankind, which deeply concerned tb® immortal welfare of the crafty juggler and there were many mysterious whisperings about a certain bond that was held against tbe unlucky wight by tbe powers of darkness.

Even in the bounds of enlightened New England (in tbe days we speak of) many a poor itinerant, who was endeavoring to earn a precarious living by the action of his nimble fingers, has been placed in durance vile by the wise selectmen of some puritanical town, until he thoroughly explained that his tricks were sheer sleight-ol-hand, and bad nothing in common with that being tbat rages about seeking whom he may devour. The world has yrown wiser since then, however, and we never beard of Blitz, Herman or Anderson being interfered with by tiie public authorities, although some of their illusions border upon the supernatural. To be sure, they are the stars ot the profession, but any one, no matter how humble his merits, is poj mitted to follow the calling, prov.dcd he pays his legitimate taxes, and carries on his performance according to law, Poor devils many of them are, who scarcely ever have a dollar that thoy can call their own, and the Fakir of Finland, or the favorite juggler to tho royal heads of Pegco and Siam, are often under the disagreeable necessity of going without a dinner, unless some obliging friend, who has a liking for the profession, will obligo them with tho needful loun of a quarter.

Tako a walk, any fine day, up Chatlirnan street or the Bowery, and a host of Side Shows will start up before you, liko the ghosts of Bunquo's children to tho witch-charmed eyes of Macbeth The inimitable stone swallower, and the lady snake charim r, can be thoroughly investigated for a ten cent stamp, which is cheap enough, in all conscience. The stone wwallower is represented en tho canvass outside, of giant Blunderbor© size, and he is bolting brickbats and cobble-stones with all tho grace of that accomplished monster, when lie made his repast on the auhjects of good king Arthur.

We pay the prico.of admission, and are much .astonished, on entering, to find hint a lank individual, with red hair and a profussion of sore eyes. The uppor part of his face exhibits a most settled melancholy, while his month is expanded in a broad grin, which we at first thought intended for a smile of welcome to tho right conclusion, that it is his natural cast of countenance.

Presently. Signor Growlfriski observes that lie has an audience of four to witnesshissupernatural powers, and placing a pile ot minute fragments ot rock before hinfj ho commences to swallow them with as much z^st as if they were sugar plums, keeping time •to the music of a cracked hurdy-gurdy, the soothing influence of which almost drives a nervous man, who is one of the visitors, into a state of lunacy.

Tho lady snake-charmer is an interesting damsel, on the shady side of forty, and she handles aiiHcondas and boa' constrictors as if they were pet poodles or favorite Canary birds. We witness any amount of kissing and hugging the disgusting reptiles, when wo are suddenly startled with feelings of apprehension and horror, by tho loud squalling of a child somowhero in tho rear of the premises. Tho idea strikes us that one of tho snakes has f?ot looso. and is masticating somebody's baby. Our fours are quieted, however, for a dark-looking man, who, we learn, is tho lady's husband, thrusts his head through Uie back door, with the laconic remark:

The kid is precious hungry, and I'm blowed if you haven't got to come out of tho cage and nuss it.''

In our travels, we once happened to fltumbio upon the show ot a happy family, with a lady friend in company. Business, itsoemed, was dull, for there was no audience beside ourselves. We found tho proprietor of tho concern quite drunk, but very sociable. He was on intimate terms the moment wo passed the door-keeper—a tall youth who seomed to have sprouted to seed, in a fustian roudabout.

Two or three sick-looking monkeys, peacock shorn of his plumos, and a fox, seemed to lord it over innumerable rats and guinea pigs, while a cur do,? and a Maltese cat moped at opposite corners of the cage. Nono of this happy family appeared to be perfectly contented, except a land turtle, who with his hoad drawn beneath his shell, dosed

away perfectly oblivious to all

outside wrangling*. Glad to see you," said the worthy proprietor, with a hiccough that made th© atmosphere foggy with bald-faced whisky. "'Tisn't often that ladies come to see my show much obliged to vou, mam. Don't tho little cusses look nice, living all so happily together. It's sort of Eden garden, mam, where, as a

fellow might say—

l)lc-that the lion lays down with the stottib but vou couldn't do it with tuein nort of beasts, mam, cos—hio—if a lion ever does lay down with a lamb, you can bet you pile—hlc—the lamb is ina

Here he thrust his hand* into the rage, and drawing eut one of the whiskered vermin, presented it, as en© might a bouquet, with tb© rowark: ••Won't you take a rat, mam

Of all the side-shows patronised by an enlightened and liberal public, Appellors, in Marsh market space, Baltimore, was the spot, for a long period of years where a man could see tbe most fun lor his money. By the cltisens it was called the Eastern-Shore men "a Heaven. It was there we first witnessed the great moral drama, of the •'Babes in the Woods," pertormed by the puppets, and a more laughable or' ludicrous thing never fell In our way.

It was a warm night in August, and the audience may have been in number about twenty-five or thirty. They were most of them, from the Eastern Shore, and what thev lacked In numbers t\iey made up tor in noise. They kept up a steady fire of Jokes on the propiieur1* nane, »dd ss^rg him though he was a V**™*?*^

p°My»

Polly! Pretty Pofly!" "Polly want a cracker?" this finally novlns that he came out on the stage ordered black man, who com­

posed the orchestra, to strike up on bass drum, until it was time for the curtain to rise.

Alter the mnsician had nearly drowned himself In his own perspiration, the curtain wont up. The first scene disclosed the kind father, on his dying bed, talking to his dear children, Tommy One Shoe and Goody Two Shoes. The man who played the puppets, behind the scenes, and spoke all the parts without tbe least particle of change in his voice, roared as loud as Forrest in the "Gladiator," bat in such husky and grating tones he must have made a dinner on chestnut burs. "My dear children," exclaims tbe fond parent, "I atn now about to die. and depart for a better world, and I shall be obliged to leave you to the care of your affectionate uncle. Ha here he comes, just in time to receive my precious charge."

Enter the unclc, with a step which approaches a hornpipe, tbat of course is very appropriate to the solemn occasion.

Dear brother, I consign my darlings to your tender care. In my will, of which dear brother, I make you the executor, I leave five thousand pounds in gold, to be divided equally between mv children when they arr'.ve at age."

Here the worthy uncle takes a hand of each of the children, and all three do-so-do np to the bedside to receive the dying man's parting blessing. There is some disarrangement In the wires, for instead of raising up in the bed to give his benediction, his heels suddenly fly in the air, like a circusrider's, and his "Heaven bless you, my children!" is accompanied by a subterranean voice behind the scene, that mutters:

Bill, yon fool, you pulled the wrong string." Here the tirst act closes amid thunders of applause, and down Jgoes th curtain. The orchestra has gone out to wet his whistle, and the audience pa«s away the five minutes' interlude with their former admiration of "Pretty Polly," aud strong anxiety to know il he will partake of a cracker.

The second act opens in the hall ol tbe uncle's stately castle, and he is discovered dancing up and down the floor, as if troubled with a raging toothache. "Yes," he exclaims, "ruin stares me in the face. My lands are mortgaged far beyond their worth my debts so numerous that thoy crush my very heart. The dowry that my brother left his brats, it must and shall t-emine. Those whom I have employed to rid me of them, shall do tbe deed this very night. Ha! here they come."

Enter Ruffians.—"My Lord, we are here to know your will concerning the two children that you spake to us about."

Uncle.—"Your

terms are high—a

hundred pounds in gold." Bad Ruffian.—"It ought to be as much again, so tip tho blunt, or you can find two other coves to do your dirty work!"

Uncle.—"I do agree, When shall the deed be done?" Bad

Rufiian.—"This

very night we'll

cut their precious wizzens ear to ear." Good Ruffian.— (Aside,) "Heaven help me to find out way to save these piettv dears!"

Uncle.—"Bring

mo the news. The

brats shall cross my path no more, and I will keep the bargain I haVo made." Exeunt all. End of Act II. Act III.—Wbod Sceno—Good and Bad

Ruffians—Tbe

Children sleeping be­

neath a tree, hand in hand. Good Ruffian.—"They look so innoceut and pure. I do repent me of the dreadful promise we have made that wicked inan. Comrado, let's spare their lives, heaven will reward us for the act."

Bad

Ruffian.—"Oh,

that be blowed

I tell you that I witnt the blunt, and as I am a man of honor, I will keep my word. uood Ruffian.—"Then know, base villain, that I will defend them with mv lifo."

They draw and fight. Good Ruffian finally* kills Bad Ruffian, and then wakes the two children, who, during the melee, have slept soundly.

My prettv dears," ho exclaims, "remain 'here, while I go and try to find out a shelter to protect you from the night air. I have slain the villian who wished to deprive you of your innocent lives."

Children.—"Do not kill us. We will be very good. Shall we lay down and go to sleep again

Good Ruffian.—"-Yes, sweet babes, lie down and have no fear. I would not harm you for the world."

Exeunt Good Ruffian.—Children asleep immediately. Interlude of half a minute—Scene changes to anothd'r part of the Wood —Good Ruffian discovered.

It Is now five long and weary hours since I darted from the little prattlers. What shall I do? I can not find them shelter in this gloomy forest, and thoy must be nearly starved. Ab here they come, their mouths stained with black berrv juice."

Children.—"Kind friend, we can not wander farther. We will lay down and die."

Good Ruffian —"Ob. heaven, aid me. and I yet

may

save their precious lives."

Rushes out, after stripping ofl his coat and covering the children—a clever trick of the wires that threw him into horrible convulsions. Children groan for a moment or two and die. Two robins, tbe sis© of turkey-buraards flutter over them, and cover their faces with leaves. Curtain goes down with great applause, and the remark from a tall eastern shoreman, whom we have observed for the last half hour, with the tears running down his cheek, I 11 be If ever I shoot another robin

Man%'enterprising individuals often start a'sido show with a learned pig. a brace of rattlenakes, and a box of cosmoratnlc view®. Shows of this charscter are sure to reap a plentiful harvest at country fairs, or wnat Is better, by attaching themselves to a traveling circus. Tbe proprietor is generally a stout, red-faced, sandy-whiskered man, attired in corduroy, and a white hat with a black crape around It. He takes your money as tnongh he was conferring a favor, and always confesses a fond jess for Tat terriers and Bourbon straight.

About twelve years ago one of the class exhibited a mammoth bog on Eden street. Baltimore, at ten cents a peep. Feeling all the dignity of a professional, be one night made his appearance at the box-offloe of the Holiday street theatre, with the remark, "Squire, I suppose yon admit people that belong to the profession on the free Hat."

Certainly we always extend that conrtesv to brother proprietors What might call your name? and In what line of character do you perform?"

Zeklel Rufflns," was the reply "and 1 show the mammoth hog—fifteen hundred pounds—down on Eden Btrwt*v'

There was a sly twinkle In the manage eye as h© sang out loud enough every body in the vicinity to near. Usher, pass in the great nog man. The members of a traveling dramatic company sometimes, through a succession of non-paying bousea, are redueed

•r

to the utmost extremity to make both ends meet. An actor will often part with every thine in the world but his wardrobe, if things run rough on a summer tour. He will let watch and trinkets go with easy nonchalance, but if obliged to leave his Roman toga and russet boots with the landlord as security for an unpaid board bill, it cuts him to the heart.

We once met some members of a company that, through a steady run of bad houses, bad dissolved among the bleak hills of New Hampshire. One of tbe musicians told us with tears in bis eyes, that he badiust pawned his trombone for tbree dollars. "What in the world made you do that?" we inquired.

His reply was to the point: Because, Cully, I was thundering hungry, and I thought playing on a ham-bone would answer my purpose betters"

In the spring of 184- the dramatic company ot John S. Porter, a veteran who has got himself in and out ot more tight places than any other man alive, found themselves dead broke in a oneborse town in Lower Canada. When show people do a slim business landlords are imperative and exacting, and in this case, so urgent were the demands of the publican who gave them bed and board.:something had to be done immediately,

Porter called the company together, and after discussing their situation pro and con, proposed that they should get up an exhibition of wax figures, to be represented by the different members of the company. "I don't see it," saidjtbe heavy villain of tbe establishment. ••Thatpork won't boil," joined in the low comedy man.

Miss Cleopatra Mellville, the leading lady, thought it would lower the dignity of the profession.

Hem," said Potter, "I think the profession is pretty well

lowered

now,

and it is tbe only chance I can see to make a raise. After arguing the point for some time, tbe company finally agreed to the managers suggestion. He arranged that a huge crate and three or lour large dry goods boxes should come rumbling up the main street of the town about noon the following day. There were many eager inquiries of what was in the wind from tbe astonished populace, and it was soon noised about that it was Barnum's great show of wax figures from the city of New York.

Ol course the boxes were full ol sawdust, and tbe only statues about the place were the various membersof John S. Potter's company. There was a terrible excitement about tbe town during the day. and the doors of the hall were shut to all inquisitive intruders. Handbills were extensively circulated, explaining the statues about to be exhibited to the free and enlightened citizens ol the town—were perfect models of the sculptor's art. There was so much excitement that the manager had not a doubt he would reap a golden harvest. It required a short rehearsal before the doors were opened to a discriminating public. A rope was stretched across that portion of the hall where the statues were to take their positions, for fear that too close an investigation might be made, and tbe tricks discovered. This precaution and seveial large placards of "Hands off" it was thought would make everything secure. :*•»(.

Heigh ho!" exclaimed the charming Miss Cleopatra Mellville, who represented the Scotch heroine, Ijady Helen Mar—"how long must I keep this dreadful awkward position, I shall faint or something, I know I shall, if they quiz me too closely."

Don't do anything of the kind, my dear, because it would bo injudicious in the extreme. shall not run the performance more than an hour, my love," said tho manager, with a winin^smile. devilish good practice for Evadne," said tho general utility man, who had taken his place as tbe Marquis De LaFayette. "Suppose that a fellow should hapen to sneeze," exclaimed George ..'ashington, represented by the heavy tragedian of the company.

Or something bit him and he had to scratch himself." responded low comedy, tbe Napoleon Bonaparte of the galaxy.

Gentleman," said tbe worthy manager, "fqr the honor of the profession I hope that nothing of the kind will occur. Come, come, take your places and let every one remain as immovable as the Pygmalion statue, for the time being. There is a rush at the door and we are going to have a bully house."

The audience poured in by twos, threes, and half dozens, and soon the hall was at least three quarters full. "Takes Barnum to get up things right," said a stout, red laced man, to his better half. "If that statty of George Washington isn't the tallest kind of sculpin, I'd like to know what is."

And so natural," suggested his wife. Manv were the compliments passed upon the charming Cleopatra Mellville, lu the disguise ot Lady Helen Mar— such as, "Ain't she sweet?" "Pretty critter, I'd like to kiss her." "She looks good enough to eat," ifcc. The wax figure show brought monev Into the manager's pocket, and would have proved a decided success bad not an inquisitive countryman made too long an examination ot'Napoleon Bonaparte.

The poor actor stood the investigator's steady stare as long as human nature could endure it, and finally was obliged to wink his eves. The astonishment depicted in the countenance of the countryman could not have been more if he had seen a dead man come to life. "Thunder and mass," he exclaimed "come this way, Sam. Here is a precious go, and no mistake."

What's the matter, Jake said his friend, elbowing his way through the crowd from the other aide of the room.

Matter enough, d—me if Bonaparte didnotwink!" Ha, ha, ha!" roared sam. "I did not think that you would bo tight so oarly in the evening."

I am as sober as a Judge, Sam. If he didn't wink, you may cut off my head and boll It up for chowder ••Gammon and aplnage! Do yon pretend to say that wax stattys can wink?" don't know much about the gen­

eral

run of that kind of cattle, but I'll be d—11 this one didn't flop his eyelids, and what's more, it's an even bet, he will do It again. Just you get on the other aide of him, 8am, and we will both give him a good, long, steady

A ten minutes stay, pnt Napoleon Bonaparte into a state ot excruciating agony. The case waa a desperate one and he felt tbat he had to wink again or die. Nerving himself for the act, be planted a tremendous sockdologer on the nose of the inquisitive Jake, and bolted for the door. Lady Helen Mfcr followed suit, and La Favette and Washington did not lag behind sufficiently long for the aadience to recover from their astonishment.

It so turned oat that the people of

the town took tbe wax figure ehow as a good joke, and the company, after paying their bills, went on their way

r6^nie^year»

ago there was a stout

built, dark featured man, Who claimed to be from Arabia, who perambulated the streets of New York, dragging a covered hand cart that contained his wife and cbild, three dancing dogs, a huge log of wood and a fifteen foot ladder. He generally showed in the bve streets, and always commenced his performance with: "Now, gentlemen, encourage me, vun verrv athrong man, my vife—my family.' His ladder trick was remarkable, and against all known laws of gravitation. He would stand it up in tbe middle of the street, and go up one side and down the other —singing, "Gentlemen see me balance a lather or two, a lather or two. The dancing dogs and shouldering the ieavy stick of timber like & fire-lock completed his performance.

Side Shows vary as much as the phases of moon, but we believe, there ib one line that never will come to end, viz "fat girls and five-legged calves."

A Chinese lady was once a sure fortune to her proprietor, but dames from the flowery land have become played out, since their numerous emigration to California. Panoramas and magic lanterns have, for a series of years, been undergoing a slow decline.

Snakes, we consider fair to middling, and the landlord of the hotel where we pen this article, though not in the show line, has the hankering of a 'Hindoo juggler after those bewitching pets. He purchased five beautiful (as he called them) copper-head pilots, from a countryman last week, and is now domesticating them in the garret, to the crreat horror of the Irish cook and chambermaid. We confess ourselves to have an uneasy face that we might, some morning, find one coiled up uuder the pillow, which might prove detrimental to our writing another article on the subject of "Side Shows.^ 4

A MAQNIFICENT FEE. \i.x

A Young Physician Falls Heir to $100,000.

The old saw thit "'tis better to be born luck than rich," finds a remarkable illustration in the case of a young physician in this State, who, unless report belies bim, has stumbled accidentally into tbe possession of such a fortune as but rarely falls to one man in a generation. His name is T. L. Matchett, and be resides somewhere in the central part of Illinois. The story of his good luck is, to say the least, a marvelous one. Our information is derived from a gentleman who is traveling through this section in the interest of a business house, and who was in the city yesterday. He is a friend ot the fortunate physician, who it appears is not

yet

aware of his unexpected eleva­

tion to wealth. We give the tale as It fell from the traveler's 1 Ips:

In tbe month of September, 1855, Mr. Matchett, then a resident of Springfield, 111., was passing through Chicago, and while waiting for the train at the Burlington and Quincy depot he saw a lady with a ehild in her arms, also waiting for the train. The lady was apparently a stranger In the land, and seemed to have no escort. While still in the depot tbe child, a little girl was seized with a sudden and violent sickness, and the mother was seriously alarmed. Mr. Matchett gallantly rushed to her assistance, tooK care of the child, and happening to be well informed in regard to infantile complaints, he succeeded in restoring it to health before the train started. His timely act of assistance, coupled with the tender and friendly manner iu which it was rendered completely won the lady's heart, and she was profuse in her expressions of gratitude. But at this moment the train came, and the young man, bidding her a hasty adieu, jumped into a car and was off. The lady, before departing on another train, made inquires concerning him and found out about Mr. Matchett and where he lived, and then she jumped into a car and was ofl'.

Here endeth the first chapter of tbe romance. Passing over the intervening pages, which are area perfect blank, we rush at once to the denouement.

A few months ago tbe lady died in the town of Aberdeen, Scotland, and in her will she bequeathed to her benefactor the handsome fortune of £20,000. It is said that the money is already deposited in some Eastern bank awaiting its claimant.

Such is, in substance, the strange story related by the commercial gentleman. Should it prove to be founded on fact, Dr. Matchett, wherever he Is, has reason to be grateful for encountering tbat blessed baby. If he is married, and is the father of a promising boy he had better send the lad at once to Mareschal College, Aberdeen, to be educated. There a romance might naturally grow out of the old one. The little girl would now be about seven years old.—[Chicago Inter-Ocean, Au2 9

A FELLOW BY THE NAME OF HOLMES." In 1845, says a correspondent of the Free Press, "Abe Lincoln," as he was then called, cam© to Bloomington, Illinois, about sixty miles from his home in Springfield, to defend an aged father in a suit for slander brought by bis son. The old man's spouse, a second wife, and not altogether saintly in the estimation of her step-son, had spoken severely of tbe step-son's wife, and he

Ey

rosecuted for slander, as was supposed some more to get the old man's money than to keep peace in the family. They had gone through tbe evidence and Lincoln made the closing speech. As he approached the close he called tbe father to his side before thejury, and spoke ot the unnatural aspect there presented in a man of these gray hairs defending himself against the conduct of his child. Raising his hand higher

than tbat frosted head, he summoned the spirit of the departed mother to console the defendant in these unmerited sorrows to shield him In tbeee davs when be needed some requittal o' affection from the assault of their thankless child. Her spirit of lovo is •11 that remains to him now. For—

The mosqr marbles rest On tbe lips that he has prest In their bloom And the names be loved to bear Have been carved for many a year

On tbe tomb."

These lines fitted it like an exquisite piece of mechanism. The case was gained. A witness of the scene who reports the case says tbat at the close he asked: "Mr. Lincoln, who was the author of tboee lines you repeated?" "Oh, said he, "it was a fellow by the name of Holmes." This "fellow by the name of Holmes" had become pretty widely known sixteen years after, when Mr. Lincoln took up his abode in tbe White House, but the lines which had helped the lawyer so well in gaining his case clung to the memory of tbe President, who was accustomed to refer to "The Last Leaf as in expressibly touching, and those six lines specially as the finest in tbe English language for true pathos.

SEB VANTOAtJSM IN CHICAGO. Once more the Chinee lever seems

likely to rue. Chicago housekeepers are in moocl bordering on desperation. tyranny of servant girls Is grinding them into the dust, and they are discussing, with great energy, the feasibility of rebellion.

The Chicago dame gazes down the vista of the past, and weeps as she recalls the period, long since vanishsd, when she was permitted to exercise a choice in taking a servant when she fearlessly wrote under her advertisement the required nativity and acquirements of her maid when she calmly informed that damsel what service and behavior she sbould expect and when —ah! when she smiled a placid smile on being told by the reckless applicant that it wouldn't do. Tbe wages then were only $250 a week for choice girls.

Times are changed—how changed Girls green from Stockholm and Baden, who cannot speak a word of English, and know not the difference between fricasoed chicken, get |2 00 to $300 a week. The best girls for general service demand and obtain from $350 to $600 a week—the average being $400 to $4 50 and cooks get any where from $450 to $1000 a week. This is not the worst of it the worst of it is that, even on these terms, there are not half enough of these queens of the kitchen to go around. Tbe result of this is tbat they receive about any prices they choose to ask for their invaluable services, and enjoy all th© "privileges" they may choose to exact. They select tbe most stylish looking places and, in fact, people domiciled in cottages and t' ose residing in the suburbs find it almost impossible to get servants of any sort for money. Riverside, Evanston, and Hyde Park are suffering a servant-girl famine. Tbe lords of those distant mansions alternately swear and apply at the intelligence offices the dames alternately weep and bake.

The servant-girls of this metropolis have adopted a sort of informal schedule of prices and conditions, which, reduced to definite proportions, reads somewhat thus:

Four dollars and a half a week. Does the street railroad run by the door?

Have you got a water back Is tbe house heated with a furnace Is the kitchen floor painted Is there a water-closet on each floor Has the servant's bed a concentric spring mattress

Is there a pier-glass in the diningroom Can I have every Wednesday aud Saturday

What room can I receive my company in, and can be come in at the front door?

Imagine tho wretchedness of th© mistress, who knows tbat her bold upon the bundle of muscle who is to stand between her and tho scrubbing-brush depends upon her answer to this catechism The eight-hour hubbub is nothing to it.—Chicago Post.

THE HORSE.

Some light-headed individual gets off the following: Horses are divided into tbe following classes, viz.: The horse proper, tbe horse radish, the clothes horse, the horse chest nut, the carpenter's horse, the mule and the jackass—human and brute.

An honest man has been termed tho noblest work of God but the article having become so scarce, and being so nearly obsolete, we ibinkthat we can, with propriety, term th© horse the no blest, etc.

Of course there are exceptions. The horse proper is a four-legged ped, like tbe elephant, as is also the carpenter horse. The horse proper is not always a proper horse*

The horse Vfe'dish is a smart horse, and is a groat biter. We never rode a horse chestnut, for various reasons they are sharp when harnessed.

The clothes horse wears shirts and drawers, and, although he is not much used as a draught borse, he is quite frequently placed in the draught.

The carpenter's horse is a great deal the jpiam-est horse we ever saw. We speak of the house carpenter, not of the borse ear-painter.

The mule and jackass, as near's we can recollect, belong to tho same class. We recollect bearing of a party of school children being asked if they bad ever seen a donkey's skin, and one of them answered "yes," and being asked where, answered: "On the donkev's back." We have seen many a donkey "skinned."

This shows that donkeys kin bo de prived of their coat. When we speak of donkey's kin we don't mean their

Natives. They ura very stubborn, and if you coax tbein you'll find that you'll get along better with them than by resorting to other measures (unless it be a measure of oats, which will In a measure pacify them, and of which they are n-oat-oriously fond).

The horses of tb© Corsicans were no ted for their fleetness, but Dexter can beat any of them.

Of Corsican (of course he can.)

MEN WHO WIN WOMEN. God has so made the sexes that W6men, like shlldren, cling to men—lean upon them as though they were superior in mind and body. They make them the suns of ^thelr systems, and they irake their children revolve around them. Men are gods, if they but knew it, and women burn incense at their shrines. Women, therefore, who have good minds and pure hearts want men to lean upon. Think ot their reverencing a drunkard, liar or libertine. If a man would haye woman do him homage, he must be manly In ©very sens© a true gentleman, not after tbe Chesterfield school, but polite, because his heart is full of kindness to all one who treats her with respect, even deference, because she is a woman who never condescends to say silly things to her, who brings her up to his levelTlf bis mind is above hers who is never over anxious to please but always anxious to do right who has no time to be frivolous with her. Alwsys dignified in speech and act who never spends too much upon ber never yields to temptation, even If she puts it in his way who is ambitious to make his mark In the world, whether she encourages him or not who is never familiar with her to tbe extent of being an adopted brother or cousin who Is not over-careful about dress always pleaaant and considerate, but always keeping his place of tbe man, the head, and never loosing it. Sueb deportment with noble principles, a good mind, energy and industry, will win any woman in the world who is worth winning.

"If

you were in Adam's place how woula you dress her?" asked a lady of gentleman who had been denouncing tbe present extravagance of women's dresses. "I would leaf her alone," was tbe reply.

Vbokttxk is nourishing and strengthening purifies the blood regulates the bowels quiets the nervous system sets directly upon the secretions, ana arouses the whole system to actlen.

Joys are our wings, sorrows are our spurs.—[Richter. A great man is always willing to be little.—[Emerson.

Take things always by thoir smooth handle.—[Jefferson. A free people must be a thoughtful people.—[Dr. Dewey,

Very near together are th© hearts that have no guile.—[Confucius. Let us have unspoken creeds, and I these quick and operative.—[Alcott.

If the hand of charity open not thy mouth, let tbe finger of sileuce rest upon thy lip.

A talent is perfected in solitude a character in the stream of the world.— [Goethe.

We know God easily, provided we do not constrain ourselves to define Him.—[Joubert. si

He who receives a good turn should never forget it: he who does one should never remember it. .. ,i rs. fiiis*1

One may live as a conqueror^ a king, or a magistrate, but he must die as a man.—[Daniel Webster. gi

Labor is exercise continued to fatigue exercise is labor used only while it produces pleasure.—[Johnson.

Prayer and religion are one and inseparable as much as there is of one, I so much of the other.—rHedge. -i

in the best books, great men tallc to us, give us their most precious thoughts and pour their souls Into ours.

Not because I raise myself above something, bu. beoause I raise myself to something, do I approve myself.— Jacobi.

By pulling your finger from tho water you leayo na hole in the fluid, and by dying you leave no vacancy in tbe jK world.

In youth—yea, in manhood—we should cultivate mind and character to

the utmost, for we know not for what end God may have destined us.

K'v.

r«

A man must bo bolted and screwed to the community before he can work well for its advancement and there aro no M: such bolts and screws as children.— [Beecher.

Nobody has a right to put another thunder such a difficulty that ho must either hurt the person by telling tho truth, or hurt himself by telling what is not true.—[Johnson. ,,i

Ourbrains are seventy-year clock's'."'^ The angel of life winds them up once for all, then closes the case, and gives the key into the hands of the angel of the resurrection.—[Holmos.

Every man, however good he may b© has a yot better man dwolling within him, which is properly himself, but to y? whom, nevertheless, he is often unfaithful. It is to the interior and less mutable being that w© sbould attach ourselves, not, the changeable ovorydayman.

(f

Right along side of this troublous life I that is seen and temporal, may. lie tho green pastures and the still waters of tbe unseen and eternal and they who know us better than we know them, can at any time step across that little i. rill which wo call death, to minister to our comfort.ja»|4I,Li ,t

God is never in a liurry. It comeB of our unbelief in Him that wo are so apt to be in a hurry. lie that belleveth should not make haste. If we look at the history of th© material world, or the intellectual world, or the social world, nothing is clearer than that God never was inn hurry, aud that Ho can afford to wait.

A Demohtkul Suuprisk. Ladies whose faces ar© clouded by superficial discolorat.ions, and who have resolved to try Hagan's Magnolia Balm as a remedy, have no idea of the welcomes surprise they will receive from thoir mirrors after a few applications

n«AYf||(Jo

of

that

healthful purifier of the complexion. If at all oxcitable. they will scream with rapture on beholding the change whether the blemish it is desired to remove besallowness, blotches, pimples, freckles, roughness, or an unnatural pallor, it is bound to disappear under

fa

tbe tonic operation of this wonderful agent. To say that th© blomish disappears, does not, however, convey any idea of the effoct prodaced by this celebrated beantlfier. The unsightly tinge, whether diffused over tb© wholo coun- a tenance or In spots, or patches, is replaced by a uniform, pearly bloom, to which no description can do justice.

ONE-HALF the people cannot take Castor Oil from its terrible nauseating taste, and recoil in the throat. Th© Castorla prepared by Dr. Pitcher, is purely vegetable, perfectly harmless, pleasant to take, and more effective than Castor Oil. It does not distress or gripe, but regulates tho system, and operates when all other remedies have felled. It acts like magic for Sloinach Ache, Constipation, Flatulency, Croup and Worms. It contains neither Minerals, Morphine nor Alcohol, Its soothing, quieting effect, produces natural sleep, and particulaily adapts it to crying and teething children. No article has ever met such unqualified endorsement by the Physicians. Take

iSi

no more Bitter Pills, Narcotic Syrtip8. Griping Purgatives or Sickening Oils. The Castorla costs but 35 ceuts, and when once tried you wilJ never be without it. ,.

a31'f

Tub man has never been found who can choke down theTorna-

Thresher. It can't be cbokIt won't be choked. It: haa hundreds of friends In this

UYES'U|ud,and

neighborhood who have tried It thoroughly

Our object being to sell m»chines we won't mim a nate. Where parties are good, or furnish ample security, we dont: hesitate to give long time. Some tie will go a

nSAYfl

UYES'U

hesitate to give lone

money is neeessary.bat a Hit great ways toward a Tornado.

a am/hAt a trial of Cider MiUs, eaob f| SAY llclalmina to be the best. No. lIvKllJ"

0''

YTLA.V|)

(JYESIL)l«raoothe*t,

flSAYR (J YESiUi

pounds^ of Cider

with 75 revolutions, No. 2, 1% -poundflwith 60 revolutions, No.:

SL 7 pounds with revolutions, while the American Mill produced 9x/t pounds with 60 evolutions.

See

It at Jones Jones'.

fisAYn

.TheTokwadoBkparator istfce most handsomely finished, work on It Is tbe best, the castings are ana it is decidedly the best in every way.

The Tor*ado Hbpabatob 30 Inch In cylinder, 3fi Inch carrier. IThe Tornado 30 inch cylinder, 41 inch carrier. The Carer Power Jg home or

10

horse. The Carey ip

Power mounted or down. WaiTantedevery one of them, at Jones A Jones, Terre-Haute, Indiana.