Saturday Evening Mail, Volume 1, Number 47, Terre Haute, Vigo County, 20 May 1871 — Page 2

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[For the Saturday Evening Mail.] WHAT KNOW ABO U,T FARMING."

4 BY THE HEDOEMAX. *7

MR. EDITOR:^—Having noticed some irregularities in farming and gardening around Terre-Iiaute, and being an old member of the Cincinnati Horticultural Society, permit, me to offer few hints through tho columns of your valuable paper for the benetit of j-our numerous readers.

TIIK ORCHARD.

Trees should be planted very late in the Spring. Buy them of some tree pedler" you do not know—somebody yon never saw before, and never expect to see again. Select a piece of poor, hard soil for planting do not plow the ground dig small post holes, 8 by 1®, and two feet deep cut off the roots of the trees to fit the holes be careful to cut off all the small fibrous roots pack the ground hard around the trees, and when you aro done planting turn the cows in the orchard to trim it. Do not remove the catapillars nests, they make nice ornaments and show good taste, Be careful to shoot all the birds about your orchard, as they would destroy the catapillars and other noxious insects. Do not have your orchard trimmed this season, or next but if you do employ somebody who never pruned an orchard—ho will not play any pro fessional tricks upon you. Do not pay much attention to pears or grapes dish ol Bartlott or Flemish Beauty, or a few line clusters of Ives' Maderia upon tho table would look extravagant. Do not cultivate your orchard, it is a wasto of time, and you would tail to havo your usual crop of knotty apples for eider.

TICK (lAIlDEX.

As warm weather comes 011 111 the Spring tho appetite naturally craves fruit, and tho lirst dish we look for 011 tho table is eggs. These should bo planted very oarly. and as tliie supply generally falls short, a large patch should be planted. Spring chickens, also, should be planted early, so as to have thorn on tho tablo in Juno. Dried apples need not bo planted until late, as thev are principally intended for wintor use, and may bo kept over, but bo suro and plant them they aro very useful. I oneo boarded in a family where dried apples wero tho principal articlo of food, Thoy gavo us dried apples for breakfast, warm water lor dinner, and lot them swell for supper, and can assuro you that it was economical living. Pickle trees should be planted in a cool shadv corner of tho garden, and watered wfth vinegar and peppersauco. Baked beans need not be planted until tho middlo of May. Butter should bo planted in a cool shady place, if plimtefl it* tho nun It grows too strong, and runs too much to vino. If the inoles troublo your garden, catch their, and take 'some wiro and ring their noses, so they cannot root. I have followed this practice for years ami find it perfectly reliable.

Tho groat pest o"f tho fruit garden is tho female eurculio. Place her under tho microscope and sho looks just like the elephant, with her long proboscis with which she makes a crescent shaped incision in the plum or apricot, dejtosits her egg, and tho fruit is ruined, withers and falls off prematurely. Catch tho eurculio, tio the proboscis into a double-bow knot, and your plums aro safe—the insect is then perfectly harmless. Melon trees should be planted early, and very carefully tended. If tho striped bug troubles your melon or incumber trees, sprinkle a little Scotch snuff 011 them tho bug will sneeze until it breaks its neck—it then quits eating. The worst bug about tho garden and orchard is the "humbug." Nothing but good common sense will rid you of hitn, and that is so scarco an articlo that it is seldom applied. Leave all the hard work in the garden to the women of course they have nothing to do in the house. Keep an old tum-ble-down fenco around tho garden so the hogs may come in at their leisure and pulverize the ground, it is astonishing how much garden an industrious hog will root up in a day. Do not aliow your familv much spaco for a flower "garden, "It takes time to tend and there's no money in it." If a friend ofltors yoa a Floral Guide, bluff him, and tell him you have an old almanac which is all the reading you want. Do not take a newspaper or a magazine, it requires too much time" to read them and when you find that your children lack capacity, buy it for

them at once, you will And it a very useful article on the farm and in the garden, but you can buy it cheaper than yon can raise it.

THE 1IKIK1E

Should le planted in an old fence row. fnll of grtins and briars, plowed very shallow, and not harrowed at all. Do not emplov a hedgeman, "you know all alout it," either plant it vonrself or employ some one who never set a hedge." Be careful never to plow or hoe it never prune it in the summer season let it grow a whole year until it looks like a row of honey locust trees, then go at it with old scythes and briar hooks, ami cut and slash it down. liOave all tho old dead brush and debris on the hedge—these give it quite a grotesque appearance and attract attention. When you have finished, let it grow a whole year and then slash it down again. Been refill to have it trimmet! bv some jierson who never trimmed a "hedge—a hedgeman might spoil it. Keen a few hogs and cattle on the hod ire wnile it is small, to make gaps so you can show your skill in after

thev grew

I used to

...... crow no trouble pruning them TKRRK-HAVTK, May, 1871.

FMIMINO is a business of circumNtan*oe« which aro never the same in any Two instances. From the farmer himself to the land he works there is to be fomid in everything some reason ft»r doing or not iloing what, under other condition*, would bo most proper or improper, ar.d whatever be the facilities at the farmer's hands, and however much or little capital he may invest, tho measure of his success is usually to bo found in his ability to make the most of his opportunities, to decide on tbo wisost eourno to pursue, and, having decided 011 11. to stick to it through thick and thin, 110 matter how diseour aging it may sometime* soem.

Young Folks.

ANAGRAMS. 6. Artist tube. 7. O! doth rob her. 8. Slope ran. 9. Bel romps 10. "Beat" is a verb.

1. Fire-irons. 2. Ilic stoec. H.' Ale post. 4. Tio rat sir. 5. Silence fun.

GRIDDLE.

My first is a quarrel, my second, transposed, May give you ilie causo whence tho quarrel arose My whole's a loud noise, which transposing again, Is—instead of a harsh—a sweet musical strain. TEMPY.

SQUARE WORDS.

Square "Seba" with Scripture proper ames. CARTER. Square the word "Fast." BEX.

SUBSTITUTIONS.

1. Change a girl's name into part of the year. 2. Change a piece of money into part of ajbuilding. 3. Change an animal into something very painful. 4. Change a garden implement into something nice to eat.

DOUBLE ACROSTIC.

1. A carriage I now will provide, 2. That any dear little darling may ride. 1. Many brave men are in my first,

In the countries over the sea tsfe 2. Many weak men my second drink (I will mention it is not tea 3. While bravo and weak men do my third, *•,

In many a burying-ground, And shall until all the dead aro raised mtm

By the last trump's awful sound. SARAH WOODWORTH.

CROSS-WOItD ENIGMA.

Mv first is in cart but not in wheel, My next is in ship but not in keel. My third is in rigiit but not in good.? My fourth is in iron but not in wood. My fifth is in rose but not in bud. 1 My sixth is in dust but not in mud. Mv seventh is in broom but not brush. Mv eighth is in sparrow but not in thrush. My ninth is in horse but not in deer. MV whole is tho merriest time of tho venr. ELEANOR.

ANAGRAMATIZED CITIES. 1. Bog Inn Tenn. 4. Moses, dine. 2. Rich new set. 5. Can A1 rest? J. Help I paid Hal. t. Go at a hot can.

ANSWERS TO ENIGMAS, CHARADES IFCC. IN LAST WEEK'S PAPER.

Enigma.—Willie Clinton, Brodlicad, Wisconsin. Charades.—1. Strata-gem. 2.(H)Emplre.

Word

Puzzles.—1. Middlesex. 2. John

\dams.

A HINT TO MEDDLERS.—A little whito rose bloomed all by herself in a nook in tho hedge. "Ah!" criod the wind in passing, what a pity you should bo suffocated tlicro! I will "blow a hole in tho Hedge, and tho breezo shall find you through it."

I pray, sir, you will leave me as I am. I breathe "well enough," said the rose.

I know better," said the wind, aail rent tho hedge as I10 passed on, and tho boys rushed through, and made her tro'mblo with lear.

You are not well placed there," he said, as he came by again "I will give yon a belter berth than that."

I beg you will leave me as I am I like my place well enough, if it were not for tho gap yoa wade," said the rose.

But the wind would not listen ho broke her stem, and she fell to the ground. "Oh, vou mustn't lie there!" ho cried "I will carry you to the spot that will suit vou exactly."

Nay, 1 entreat you to let me lie and fade in this pleasant grass," said tho roso, beseechingly but he caught her up, and whirled her 011 a few yards, when her petals were scattered, and her leafless stom was cast 011 tho hedge.

How is this?" exclaimed the wind. How is it? this is how it is," replied the hedge "there are some folks that are never satisfied but when they aro meddling with other folks' affairs they think nobody can bo happy except ill their way and you are 0110 of them, and this bare stem is a specimen of vour work."

A LONG NOSE.

Every one in Batavia knows "Old Fenton," or" Tho Governor," as tho bovs call him. Ho is tho execntivo officer of the village bound. In tho administration of matters pertaining to that branch of the public service he enjoys the confidence of his fellow citizens, and is esteemed "intelligent, honest, and faithful to the Constitution." A decent regard for voracity compels us to sav that his personal appearance would le inaccurately described if we were to call it engaging for his body is long, his

faee

is long, and his nose is

very long. The latter peculiarity, however, must not be spoken of too lightly, for Shakespears, in "A Winter's Tale," makes Autolyeus say: "A good noso is requisite to smell out work for the other senses." Besides its length, the general get-up of Kenton's nose is wonderful. A stranger, 011 viewing it the first time, is struck with it as something awful. And Fenton knows it, and laughs. On one occasion, last winter, the weather being very cold, he went into a larrooni where a number of strangers wero seated One of them seeing that his usually rose-colored proboscis was evidently touched with frost, mentioned that "fact. The "Governor" drew his ion* face to its fullest extent and replied: "W a'al. I ain't to It b-blame if 'tis. I r-r-mblxni it as fur'z I c-eould reach!" At another time he was wheeling a barrow toward the railroad depot. Seeing a portly, well dressed stianger, with

years closing them no. plant mv hedges without trimming satchel in hand coming nn town, he ind

tough and thorny. Now? quietly sat down on his load and await-

I plant «hem aireadv trimmed and cd his arrival. When the traveller thev crow smooth and" nice and I have came up the "Governor" said: "I s-sav,

up tne

friend, 1 wish you'd b-b-brnsh that otV my nose. I "e-e-ean't get to him!*'

right.—

A WARNING TO STAQB-STRUi YOUTHS.

Opinion of a Distinguished Gommedi** Nearly twenty yean ago, Baysa writtf in the La Crosse Democrmt, we were 0 to speak, crasy to enter upon the miser ies or mysteries of theatrical life-4 explore the secrets of the green-rootf and attempt the vicissitudes of life or hind tho foot-lights.

One night w®

visited Burton's Theatre on Chamber street, witnessed his impersonation Toodles, and tho next day called upo» the distinguished comedian to see if was possible for us to enter his theatr as an apprentice with a view to becoming an actor. Burton was sitting in hH private office when we entered and ivr trodueed ourself. After stating to hio the object of our visit telling him a our life, hopes, plans, fortune, prospects willingness to work, and determination to be somebody, it nothing prevented, he leaned back in liis chair looked us with a kind, friendly, interested loo* we shall never forget, it was so pleasant, and said: "Young man, you had better go drown yourself. If you have pluckf energy and ambition you can find a better future for you in other pursuits— with the auditors rather than the actors. One-half the work required to make a good actor will mako a rich man in any other profession. You havt. spoken to me plainly and with earnesi hopefulness. Allow one who is, comparatively speaking, an old man, to adviso you never to look to the stage as a means of support. Every city is fuL of poor, miserable devils, hanging about the doors of theatres, living in idleness, waiting for a chance to be put on in somebody's place. The tinsel of the stage and the reality of life are very different things. The smiles, the laughs tho fun and the well-fitting costumes worn by the actors are only for the occasion. But few smiles come from the heart, they are only face deep while the clothes are left in the wardrobe after the actors have donned their rags and gone home. "If you are willing to work you had better do it outside of a theatre, it will be better for you. Should you not happen to possess those qualities which constitute good actors, to enter upon tho life would effectually spoil you for anything else for once let the shiftlessness of unqualified stage life be tasted, and the victim is forover spoiled. "Should you bo possessed of mettle and good material for an actor, just so fast as you go up others will pull you down, or attempt to. You will encounter bickerings and jealousies, and all sorts of combinations against you, for actors, like musical celebrities, aro most jealous of each other. The road to success is a hard one: •while, as a general thing, an actor's life is darker even than the stage when tho audience has retired, and the gas has been turned off. "If, however, you wish to try it, I will give 3rou a chance. But it is a dog's life you would enter upon. A situation one week—and idleness for a month. A little cheap applause from the boys 111 the gallery, and a hungry stomach after you have "gone homo. Better stick to type-setting—then you will have the making of yourself, and the malting or unmaking of actors besides.

Thanking Mr. Burton for his adv wo bade him goodby, and hastened I to our case and type-setting. 1

NEWSPAPER AD VER TISIIG

CUTffa

ris.T)lff^ESRkiJicBp wri? 1 "y." .. newspaper'advertisirig.f'lie toa newspapers in this fashion':

AT

We occasionally seo a vignette orria menting the title of a newspaper. The New York Tribune has one they have had a longtime. In the center is an old-fashioned bull's-eye watch, with some sort of bird perched 011 top of it. On one side is the boy that stood 011 the burning dock, or the one that carried Longfellow's Excelsior through the Alpine village to Lookout, mountain, we can't dctermino which. On the other sits Marius, weeping because he has 110 more New York Worltls to conquer.

A little to the right of Marius is Horace Greelev, plowing with Alderney heifer. Back of him'aro tho ruins of Fisk's Opora House, with Barnum's menagerie filing by tho Pyramids in tho distance. There are other accessories, of course, such as a locomotive drawing a plow, and a manufactory of some kind running into a light-house under a full head ol steam, but the above are tho principal features.

Tho Sun has the cut of an immense fan, supposed to "shine for all." On one side Is a female trying to get away with a pair of scales she lias picked op somewhere, and 011 the other is another young woman holdinng up a croquet mallet.

There are numerous other varieties of newspaper advertising cuts we have not touched upon, but our article is, probably, already sufficiently "exhaustive," and we withhold."

A ONE Hoss NIOOA—A few years ago, a gentleman moved to St. Louis »nd purchased a nice property, and, among other things, to contribute to his convenience and comfort, procured a vary genteel carriage. A likely colored boy was employed at a fair salary to take charge of the establishment, and discharge the numerous duties which arse around a well regulated homestc&dFor a time things went 011 smoothly with Chores, but lately he seemed "Ut of spirits, and seldom smiled. His eiiployer observed this despondent demeanor of Chores, and lie determined to get at the bottom of it. Perhaps he was in love. But no matter. Tak'ng Chores aside one day when he looted more gloomy than usual he inqui edj considerately, what it was that a led him. "Well", you see, Mars'r," bef«,n Chores, in a sort of tragic style, "yiu got but one hoss, while all "the gcrtlemen 'bout hea has two an' all de loys dat calls me a onohoss nigger an' 18 I can't stan' dat, I spects I'll have fo* to resign. I likes you fusrate, Ma*'r, and I'd like to stay if you hat! two losses, but you see how it is—de bovs,dey can't quit hollering Dere go dat one horse nigger!" Not wishing to lose the services of so valuable an assistatt, a second horse was purchased, and Chjres became a two-horse nigger.

A POPULAR actor, becoming disgirted with the unaccountable public, ha» reIly solved to pander further to its vitided tastes, ana will bring out, during!he

Hummer, a play which for sensjtion

THE Commune must go to the wall, will out-Herod Iletod. Machine*? of for it has Germany and the Republic all kinds, saw-mills, rolling-uiills,eof-agaiust it. But its'demonstration lias fee-mills, (P. K. Millsi, railroad sMbeeu 110 child's play. It is still que*- 1 dents, stmmhoat explosion, with t«tion whether, were it ntl for the moral tal plnngo into a patent sausage 6'a" support of the Germans, Paris first and chine for the last act. will const t»i to Franco next would fly bnt one Hag—| wmo of the immense atrractiwns. and that the ml. The hrawnv work-! men who lmmbard President Thiers? BRT^HAM Yorso has ordered tail*"! are like the Scranton miners in their prayers against the

grasshoppers

hostility to the capitalists, the com-• Summer. The false account of his dJnth American Tract Society, that he asked munc, considered as a revolution, is a was probably got up by some one *bo a rough Arkansnn what denomination wrong-headed movement, ami so is a wishes to mnrrv Mrs. Young. It i«#aid a certain dilapidated-looking ineetincrstrike of coal-heavers and the com- that if Brigham wore an additional Vt*«id house belonged to. muuisls are not wholly in the wrong, 011 his hat every time he lost a wifi or "Wa'al, ntranger,'' wa^ the reply, nor their opponents wholly in tho mother-in-law, it is estimated th he "she voir a Hard-Shell Ra|tti«t, but/A^

THE HOUSE OF MONTMORENCY/ The sons of the houae wtre fierce in battle, careless of life, indifferent to suffering, contemptuous toward the canaille, proud of bearing even toward their equals, ferocious persecutors, and superstitious in religion. Bat they wero loyal and true, in word and deed they ever held honor above all other considerations they accepted the highest responsibilities as their right, and were only not ambitions because, from father to son, the highest honors were conferred upon them, almost as a mat ter of course. These qualities were handed down from one to the other, almost without change or diminution and there was not one who can be called, in any sense, a labes generis. Some were unlettered some more sangnina ry than others some of less ability but, during all their twenty generations, the same pride distinguished every one the same contempt of things petty and mean the same personal prowess the same nobility and the same "masterfulness."

The only noble house that can at all compare with them, in continued prosperity and personal distinction, is that of Douglas. No other can show any thing like the long list of honors boasted by the Montmorencys. From them have come six Constables of France, twelve marshals, and eight admirals They have been grand-masters and knights of all the orders, grand-cham berlains and officers of the crown, and were for seven hundred years premier barons of France. Henry IV. declared that, in antiquity of descent, next to the house of Bourbon, must be placed that ot Montmorency their earliest known maternal ancestor was sister to an English king, their wives have been of royal blood, and their daughters have married into royal lines.

They have been a great fighting family. From father to son, they are all soldiers. In later times, when fighting was harder to get at, a few of them entered the church, of course with a view to becoming carainals, for every thing done by a Montmorency must be conducted in the grand style, and with an eye to the dignity of history. And even in days, so sad for the historian of tho grand style, when no nobleman was safe from the collector and retailer of gossip, very little was found to be told of a Montmorency which even a Robertson would be ashamed to repeat. It would almost appear as if every one of these great seigneurs was not only a hero 011 his horse, and with his marshal's baton in his hand, but that he posed for posterity in mufti, and even, iudging from the scanty records which remain of tho family at bedtime, in his night-shirt. Some of the members of cadet branches, it is true, allowed themselves occasionally to relax from these sterner virtues notably Gilles, of the Laval branch, one of the defenders in the famous siege of Orleans, who was made a Marshal of France for his valor, but was such a notorious criminal that they were obliged to liang him as an example. But these cases are rare.

IIO W HE SAVED THEM. In a little hamlet in Normandy a peasant announced to a farmer, tlio other day, the unwelcome arrival in a neighboring village, of at least two hundred Uhlans, who were, according to tlieir wont, making a clean sweep of all that took their fancy in the yards. "And, 1 of course, your farm, which is almost) the best iii

those

parts, won't

pjg-°-ffipr/thanght he would profit Immediately propared to place his cattle in safety. He called his wife and daughters all went to work with a will. Old quilts, petticoats, all torn and tattered, were thrown over the backs of the animals, right up to their horns feet were bound up in straw, as

wore

their heads calves,

sheep and goats were submitted to the same toilet bottles of medicine, and trusses of straw, all gave their silent testimony a trough was filled with water, and in the middle, like a gigantic mast, was placed a magnificent syringe. Up came the Prussians. At the door of the stable they stand stupefied. They can't conceive what 011 earth the master of the house can have been doing with the monster squirt and still less can they make out the mulliing of his patients.

Maladir, vmladicV asked the least dazed of the troop. "The plague that's all."

At these words, which must havo recalled to the Prussians the ravages so often by tho terrible disease in their own country, they concluded their visit somewhat abruptly—in fact, skedaddled—leaving the ready farmer to chuckle over his stratagem.

GENERAL SHERMAN'S SPEECH FALSEL YREPORTED—IIIS CORRECTIONS.

NEW YORK, May 8.—Thomas W. Conway, Secretary of the Union league Club of New' Orleans, writes to tho Tribune that 011 the 22nd ult., at a reception given General Sherman, the General made tho following speech: "MR. PRESIDENT: I am not much of a speaker. My forte is action, not speech-making* I do not wish my remarks this evening to bo reported in the newspapers, for I see that what I said 011 tne occasion of a former reception extended to me since my arrival has been entirely misrepresented, and I am credited with words I did not utter at all, therefore I hope there aro no reporters here to serve the present interview as thev served the other to which 1 have alluded. My duty as Commander of the army of the country keeps me employed in military matters, and by that employment I may bo enabled to assist the nation in its civil and political interests. But I do not wish to le considered a politician. I strive as well as I can to do what my official duty compels, and in doing that find myself amply occupied. I tio not seek any civil position whatever, and do not wish to bo suspected of doing so. Indeed, I should positively decline any offer of a civil or political position. I mean to devoto my whole time in future to tho study of the military art, not witli the view- of destroying, but as a moans of promoting the good of all. even tho lower classes of our citizens."

A PERSON'S HEIGHT AND WEIOIIT.— The following calculation is said to show the relation which should exist between height and weight in a healthy person, speaking generally, of course:

A man 5 feet 1 inch high should weigh 120 pounds feet 2 inches, 12i pounds .» loot :i inches, 1:1.1 pounds r» feet finches. l-'t'.t pounds 5 feet inches, 142 jwmnds feet 0 inches, 14i pounds & feet 7 inches, 14S pounds feet inches, 1-Vi ponnds feet inches, 162 pounds 5 feet 10 inches. 169 pounds 11 inches, 174 pounds: 0 feet, I"* pounds.

this} in tho balmy days of eolportage by the

would have to have a ha! 27 fl. hist. ruu he,- ni)ir."—Jh'r}i~r,x Drawer.

THE SAVAGES AND THE TELEGRAPH.

4 Trieh on the Anraeanum Indians. It is«ot a little curious, saya the Independunte of Chile, to know how the telegraph wires and poets have been preservedcm injury by the Indians, otherwise Mie communication of the frontier forts with one another could not have been kept up. The following stratagem was h* upon and related by a traveller recently from the frontiers, who was asked how this was. He said when the posts were erected there were some forty or fifty Indian prisoners in the camp of the army. General Pinto, fearing that they might destroy this important work of civilization, called them together, and brought in an electric battery: "Do yeu see this wire which is placed here?"* "Yes, General." "Well, then, I have caused it to be placed there, so that you should not pass to the other side or touch it, because if you do, your hands will adhere to the wire."

The Indians smiled with an incredulous leok. The General called them one by one, and made them lay hold of the wires of a battery and then set it agoing. "Let go the wires, I tell you." "I cannot, sir, my hands are benumbed."

On cutting off the current of course they dropped the wires. Each Indian was made to experiment for himself. Before letting them go the General recommended them to keep the secret and not tell it to their country-men.

Of course they did quite the' contrary, and told every Indian what they had seen and what had happened to them. Since then not a wire has been damaged, because they now all believe that if they touched the wires they would bo caught and held prisoners until tho troops came up."

HEREDITARY PECULIARITIES. An officer whose little finger had accidentally been cut across, and in consequence become crooked, transmitted the same defect to his offspring. Another officer, wounded at the battle of Eylau, had a scar reproduced on tho foreheads of his chilaren. When the new-born infants ot Europeans are compared with those of savage nations, the shape of the toes in tho former is found to have been modified by the fact that their parents were in the habit of wearing shoes. It has been observed that tho Hapsburg, or Austrian royal family, for some generations back, have had a thick upper lip, which first appeared after an ancestor of theirs had intermarried with the Polish family Jagelion. A gentleman communicates tho information that has himself witnessed a single whito lock of hair in two successive generations of a family which, moreover, bore a surname tluit may possibly have been first suggested by tho phenomenon now described. Observations, analogous to thoso which havo been recorded, havo been made also in the case of the lower animals. In Carolina a dog which had accidentally lost its tail, transmitted its defect to its descendants for three or four generations. A sheep in Massachusetts, with a long body and short legs, in 17W1, became the progenitor of an apparently permanent breed, possessing the same characteristics. This now occurs iu various parts of North

Amcrlcn, in on]lel the Ottflr whoop, and

is prized by farmers, as its short litnbs psevont its being ablo to leap over tho fences.

A FEW evenings since John Sutgood was paying court to his dulcinea. Sho had smuggled him into the parlor, and the darkness only served to conceal her blushes while John told the story of his love. Tho muttered words reached the parental oar, and coming suddenly into tlie room I10 demanded to know of Mary who it was she had with her. "It's the Ciit, sir," was the mumbling reply. "Drive it out of here," thundered patcrfamilia.s. 'Scat!" screamed Marv and then sotto voce: "John, nieaow a little."

John sat up a wo fill vowl. "That cat's got a colli," remarked the parent.

John yowled louder than ever. "Comfounil it, bring a light, and scare the thing out."

This was too much, and John made a leap for tho window, carryingglass and frame with him. "Thunder, what a cat!" said tho parent, contemplating the ruin after the light was brought "I never saw anything like it, and, conifound it, its (nil is made out of broadcloth," as he viowod a fluttering remnant hanging from the window

CLAY IIOLE ROOK'S PANTHER. Clay llolbrook recently returned from*a trip south for the benefit of his health. Clay look verv well indeed his health is much improved, but his friends were surprised and grieved to notice upon his return that his hair was tinged with gray.

The fact is, (Hay was pretty badly seared while out hunting one ilay, and it is supposed his hair turned whito about that time. Ho was alone, without oven a dog, when suddenly he came upon an immense panther, tnoasuring nine or ten fact from tip to tail. It was asleep, which was most fortunate, as it gave Clay time to collect his thoughts and his weapons. He put his bowic knife in his teeth, his revolver in his belt, and cocked both barrels of his gun. He took off his paper collar, and threw away his "chaw" of tobaitco. Then I10 crept a little nearer and fired both barrels into the beast, emptying his revolver into it, too, to make sure work.

He killed it, quite dead. It was a very fine calf. He paid the owner ten dollars for it. thejnext day.—Indianapolis Mirror.

CAJIL PRETZEL has in the field an almanac, which ho gives the title of "Yediler Brognostdikador und Almineck Kalindcrfor 1S71." Carl locates the signs of the zodiac in der shkunk, kidden, yackass, kroslioblier, puinple pee, ped pug, shnabbin durdle, etc. The following is a specimen of the author's philosophy:

No madder how gro*s you vas in der peeble's eyes, no madder who vou tink you vas, when you gono died der vorld vood gone on yoost der same mi tout yon. 1'nd it vas yoost so foolishness to tink dat vhen you put your dhumh in do rifer vassor und mil quickness dook it out, der hole vood shtop derc vhuti your finger vas gone out.

A MISSIONARY of the American Sunday School Union in Minnesota, who is sustained by the Sunday School of the

IT is related ol a colporteur, sent out Fourteenth street Presbyterian Chur-h in Now York, was opposed in his efforts to organize a school in a certain place bv a man who finally yielded, saying: "\Vell. God knows we are wicked enough and if any thing can In? done to rai~tt the price of land, I'm in for it."

The nehool was organized, and *ii««a

CATHOLIC EURO PEON I&MALJ BILITYlJ' A late London letter to the Boston Advertiser says:

There are moments when tlio doing* of Catholic Germany raise the oxpectation that there, at'all events, the demands of the Papacy upon the intellect and the lite of the faithful will end in a violent breaking away of the lait3*. Dr. Dollinger'8 excommunication has caused a violent commotion. The King ot Bavaria has not the power, as he is without the vices, of Henry VIII., but if he persists iu upholding the Munich professor he may leave a mark iu German history. Who knows but that the German war may end in the ruin of Romanism—first in Germany, and afterwards in Italy, Belgium and Catholicc Europe. It is said by competent authorities that the impulse which wasgiven by the war to the general life of tho nation shows itself, in Catholic Austria particularly, in an awakened longing for religious freedom. The celebrated Syllabus puts compromise out of the question. No modern nation could live by that document. It proclaims war the knife with every civilized State. Henc* if a reigning sovereicu adopted it—and he would adopt it if he accepted the decree of the Ecumenical Council— his own relation to the Popo «n the one hand, and to his people on the other, would bo changed. He must choosc between his subject and the Pope. Every Catholic sovereign iu the world will be called upon to make this choice. A majority of the population in Bavaria-, would support tne government in conflict with Rome, and if tho govern ment deserts tho exconnmunicated professor it will range against itself the mass of the educated laity. Tho Bavarian government has officially disavowed tho Papal decree, and it is bound protect a priest who is branded for refusing his assent to thesamo manifesto. From this one cause great events may spring.

The meekness of the American bishops has disappointed tho Catholic liber-, als. It was difficult to conceivo that men coming from the centre of freedoms of thought could endorse a policy which! placed a ban upon every principle uponi which the government of thoir country was lounded. Tho Bishops of tho Unitod Sates, at all events, might bo relied upon. You know how mistaken the poor liberals wore. But Americans.. visiting England, whether laymen or, bishops, aro fond of disappointing us. They usually leave their opinions at home. I havo raroly soon an American gentleman, for oxaniblo, testify even toleration for European republicanism. Just as our big men hero, in tho days of American slavory, were wont, with some remarkablo exceptions, to court tho proslavcry leaders and use the phrases thatjwcrcjcurrent in that society, so Americans, landing in Europe, began, at onco to laugh at ovorybody but 111011archs. No 0110 so hard "upon a Fro noli republican, or Italian republican, or a Spanish republican, as tho average^ American visitor. Conversation with, many of this class lias convinced that tho idea is a lixodono iu tho American mind, that tho only pooplo in the world who aro lit for thoforni ol' govern ment in which froodoin is fully developed—aro tho happy and wonderful peoplo,. who constituto tho United States.

A BEAUTIFUL face is ono of God's beautiful works but Ho has made more beautiful tbiiuna- .Wo ahull eee, maybe, in our travel of to-morrow— you or -I— some angiUar-facoil woman of youthful but uncertain age, in gold-bo wed glasses, perhaps, and shall say at tint first cruel glance—you or I—"Good, gracious, what a, woman to live with!" A11 old gentleman, her attendant, goes haltingly to the placo beside her and there is such touching and delicate at-: tention 011 her part to every want ot his such grace of action, such tender, eager, yet not officious or presuming^ watchfulness, that you can not keep vour eyes from her, ugly though si* be anil tho fae« of the old gentleman,* grows radiant as it turns toward her, and vou perceive him to bounder such abiding oharm. as her low, musical voice falls on his ear, that, little by little, even as you look, tho angularities'' melt away into the fine flowing lines, ami the lionioly text of her face, houi by hour, and feature by feature, grows luminous with a sweet, doop moaning that is as subtle and penetrating in its influenco as beauty itself. Anil if an hour of onlook caii work such transfiguration, and make one blind to any possible crabbedness of text by reason of the sweet meaning it carries, how shall it bo with tho roading of a month, a or a year, or a life?—iJtmmhl ('. MitckcH..

LORENZO Dow, tho itinerant preacher..^ so famous in his lifotiino for his eccen- & trieity, commenced his sermon on ones occasion by roading from Ht. Paul, "I can do all things." Tho preacher jtaused, took off his spectacles, laid them on tho open Bible, and said, "No, Paul, you are mistaken for once I'll bet you five dollars you can't, and stake tin money." At the sanio time putting hi?y hand in his pocket, ho took out a liv dollar bill, laid it upon the Bible, took up his spectacles again, and read— "through Jesus Christ,our lord." "Ah!' Paul," exclaimed tho preacher, snatching up tho five dollar bill, and replacing it iu his pocket—"that's a different matter: tho bet's withdrawn."

IT seoms to us that death, whether 11 enters tiie palace of a king or the hut of a beggar, ought to be respected siitlicientlv by passers-by to restrain their* from unseemly hilarity toward the mourners. A noted prize-fighter a few days ago, having lost his wife, wa* coin passioned and sympathized with by a number of his professional brethren who, after the manner of i»the men, attended the funeral. Wo are glad they did. It was honorable in them so to do. But it was not exactly the fair thing for several of the daily papers the next day to make burlesque allusions to the scono of domestic gnel. Wo thought 011 roading those satires, that the priwi-lighters really appeared to better advantage than tho editors.— Golden A'ji.„

YOUNO man, it is easy to IKS nobody. Go to

the

In the

drinking saloon to spend your-

leisure. You need not drink much now —just a little beer or some other drink.

meantime play chequers, domi­

noes, or something else. If you read, read "dime novels" of the day then g'keeping your stomach full and your, head empty and in a few days you will IKJ nobody,

unless

you should turn out

to be a drunkard or a professional gambler, either of which is worse than to Itnobody.

MONT young men consider it a grea: misfortune to le bom poor, or not t« have capital enough to establish themselves, at their outset in life, in a gooe: comfortable business. This is a mistaken notion.

.So

lar from poverty bein^

a misfortune to fhein, if we may judgt... from what we every day behold, it iV really a blessing ihe chance is more than ten to

one

against him who starts

with a fortune.