Saturday Evening Mail, Volume 1, Number 41, Terre Haute, Vigo County, 8 April 1871 — Page 2

Rural.

IIoW

?or

TO HAVK EARLY TOMATOKH,— Compton, of Haw ley, Penn.,

D. A.

writes to the American Institute Farmers' Club as follows:—"Do not forget to tell your agricultural friends that tomatoes on heavy soil may be obtained from four to five weeks earlier than usual, by setting the plants on the tops of sharp hills. The hills should oe about fifteen inches high, and throe feet diameter at the baM. Water the plants only when first set,and dust the plant and whole ihill freqenutly with plaster, The tomato coming from a hot and dry country, will endure a drought that would provc| fatal to less hardy plants. What it needs most is heat, and this is secured by planting on steep hills, on which the sun's rays strike less obliquely than on tho flat surfaces. Land should not be over rich for the tomato, very fertile soils

Producing

too great a growth of vine.

he vines should be "pinched in" and the blossoms removed after the first settings have attained the slzo of marbles but in any caso tho vines should bo permitted to fall directly on tho ground, that tho fruit may have the full benefit of tho heat of the sun nnd tho warmth refracted from tho earth. By saving tho first well-formed ripe tomato for seed, for several successive

'ears, a variety may be obtained, that oarliness, will be far superior to the original stock.

I ADVICE OK A GABBENKB TO HIS SON. —Alwavs cultivate with your eyee turned "toward tho nearest market. This ought to bo tho first rule for a farmer, for, without convenience to sell your products at fair prices, and to et your manures easily and cheap, arming will not pay well, if it pays at all. "Rue early in the. morning," and have your oye on everything. A good start In worth many an hour of labor through tho day.

Ho your own oveiRcerand foreman. You are no longer an independent man as soon as there is an induipensible individual upon your farm. Bo ready to port with tho "best, and to take place. That will do away with actions and impertinence.

his ex-

Bo kind, lust, and fair, in dealing with your hands, but "keep up your hedges." In other words, don't let others interfere with your authority.

Let ortlrr be the farm's first law. Disorder and neglect are very expensive.

Have your cattle gently treated you will save many a valuable animal, and prevent manv a sad accident.

Take caro of all tho tools, nnd have the best ones: they are the cheapest aftor all.

Don't neglect good ad vice, but do not accept it readily from every one and, chiefly, do not consult your helps you are sure to spoil them. Keep up your authority, anyhow.

Keep a ledger of expense and profits and, again, "rise carly in the morning." —ilorticult uri.it.

SrilAIN OK

TIIK

COKKIN JOINT.—For

an accident of the abovo kind, Prof. Law, in tho New York Tribwte, recommends the following treatment "Take oil'the shoo and shorten tho too with tho knifo or rasp, but without lowering tho heels in tho slightest degree keep tho patient standing in a rory wot puddle of

clay,

or in simplo

water, during tho whole of tho day. but turn it into a woll-llttored stall where It may rest at night rub tho sides and front of the pastorn as high up as tho fetlock with tincture of cantharides, repeating it daily until a free exudation comes from tho surface, then dressing daily with fresh lard until tho irritating effects have passed off, whon tho cantharides may again bo applied, and repeatedly in tho same way. A perfect rest of not less than six weeks Is demanded even.in mild cases, as tho friction incident to the play of the tendons over tho bono invariably aggravates tho iniurv and incurs disease of tho bono, whicii is practically irremediable"'

SAViNii MVTI I.ATKO TIIHES—Fruit treos, shade trees, ami ornamental shrubs, are sometimes broken bv cattle ami other kinds of live stock, and also by high wind. In many cases the damage mar be repaired by setting the broken limits or trunks, matching the parts nicelv together, and then binding on mud mixed with cow dung to keep it from cracking. A correspondent of tho Cincinnati Gazette says ho had a very nice May cherry tree in his yard. A horse got in and broke the top oir a little alovo the first, limb. There was a splinter of wood and a little bark at one side. He set it up and matched the broken parts as well as he could, bandaged the fracUire, and tied tho tree to a stake, spreading on grafting wax as fi*r as the r.ark was broken. The tree grew as well as ever-

A NOVET. WAY OK PRESERVING GRAI»KH.—A California viper says:— "The Chi nose have a novel way of preserving grapes, and one which Is said to l« very successful. They keep them In pumpkins. The pumpkin is carefully chosen must le ripe, and without" blemish. An aperture large enough to admit of the hand is mace the inside is well elonned, and tho rl|x gram* are protected by a tight cover. The gra|es retain excellently their sixe and flavor. Perhaps so.

Ov1icR-f*KT.TTXri GRATE VINES.—'The 1/union Hardener's uiagNgine says: "IT there bo any one prevailing fallacy, it* grape culture which we should always no on our guard against. It is, without question, the tendency to afford the vines more nutritive aid than they can appropriate, a ml we may be sure of t&ls, that many more vines are injured by excess of food than by deficiency. In the vegetable kingdom the same law prevails as In the animal: it is not the quantity of food taken into the system which affords nourishment, but the quantity actually digested."

T« SWKKTKN FROWY RCTTKR. A *&rrc*|K>ndent of the New England Farmer savs sweet or sour milk will sweeten frowv butter much better than salt-peter. Inhere is nothing which absorbs smell* or taste so quickly as milk, cream or butter and there is no agent so desirable to use in extracting the wooden taste from all new utensils, A churn c-in h*VQ tho tiwte of wood wholly taken out by it.

of our best teamsters PWTWL

the hrvusln of their hor*** by a piece of er

cloth about two feet square, hanging down front tb» lower end of the collar. This is an excellent practice in cold weather, as the most important part of the animal it constantly sheltered from the cold wind, especially when traveling toward a strong current. The forward end of horse blankets should be made as closely around the breast of a horse as our garments fit our bodies.

TittcVigo Agricultural Societv propose to make their neat annual fkir the mast interesting ever neld in this city.

Young Folks.

FLOWER CONUNDRUMS.

When angrv frowns tho winter's blast, And seething waters roar. What flower would aid the shipwreck crew,

To reach the wish'd-for shore

Tho sailor bound for foreign shore, In search of wealth or fame, In his darling's oar these words breath

What flower will give their name

CHARADE.

The cat does the Jirst on a cold winter night, As she cosily sits by the fire

Then the mice can play, In their own simple way, Though over ready are they to retire.

A dog Is my next, when the fox ho pur-

O'er mountain, through bush, and thro* brake, And the huntsman's loud cheer

Kings out shrill and clear, Poor Reynard they'll soon overtake.

You vourself aro the whole when Bow HKI.LS you buy, And if you its'pages do scan,

You will certainly find Amongst books of its kind. It will alwavs bo placed in the van.

eiN'ow

W. HERBERT.

ENIGMA.

I'm sometimes large, I'm sometimes small In shape I am much like a ball I'm sometimes rod, I'm sometimes brown I'm seen at times in every town I'm somotimes sweet, I'm sometimes sour Young folks play with me by the hour I'm cut and beat, and often bruised, And into drink I'm sometimes fused Sometimes I am encased in dough, And eaten too, by high and low A housewife, if she's very smart, Of me will make a handsome tart I sometimes have a rusty look, I'm then liked best by ev'ry cook Of names I'm called by not a few, And if vou guess one, that will do.

RAJAII'S BUNGALOW, MADRAS.

LOGOGRIPIIS.

1. Whole, I am a sound behead, I am a number restore and transpose, I am in music curtail and reverse, I am a weight behead, I am forward reverse, and I am a denial behead, I am a vowel. 2. Whole, I am an occult power benoad, I am an injury again beherd, I am part of the body transpose, I am an animal reverse, ana I spoil.

J. P. R.

NUMBERED CHARADE.

My 4, 18, 7, 11, 22, 11), is an order of knighthood. My 2, 7, 3, 12, 20, 18, 11, 9, is to annoy. My 12, 7, 21, 1, is part of the eye. My 11, 2, 5, 15, 20, 1, 12, 14, is a Chinese town. Mv 3. 12. 1, 20, t, 19, 21, is a celebrated actress. My 8, 23,16, 10,17, 10, is a Mediterranean island. My 11, 21, 7, 13, is part of a wheel.

My wholo is the name of a Canadian statesman. J. UNDERBILL, MONTREAL.

ANSWERS TO ENIGMAS, CHAlew-*-RADES AC. IN LAST WEEK'ff PAPER. ...

Charade—Spar-row, hawk. SQUARE WORDS. 1. W A S E A O N S O I

E N E A O N E S E N S E

I E

E N 1) E I) Decapitation

""I***" TLN ^T

^A Logogriph—Sword, word or. wedge, edge or, glass, lass or, rasp, asp.

REMARKABLE ACROSTIC.—It is not unusual to find among tho writings of poets some little acrostical waif that entwines in its verses tho recollection of some sunny littlo face, perhaps long ago gone to a home beyond the azure of the skies, or the name of some dear friend interwoven liko fragrant flowers in a leafy coronet. Edgar A. Poe gives us a pretty specimen of this kind of verse, using the natno of fVanccs Sargent Osgood but wc think there has never been a specimen whore genius and grace have been so prettily combined as in the following lines, which are taken from the portfolio of a promising young poet of New York city, whose name wo withhold in consideration of his modesty. By taking tho first letter of each line, the last letter of each line, and the first letter of the first line, the second of the seoond, third of the third, etc.. the same name appears In each. Also the initial letters of the words in tho first line give the name again, with simply, however, the initials of the first two names. This little fragment is entitled

MY NERCRB.

Still mint* rest o'er bright it tela*, now stray o'er nook*, Aro tn It* flowing forms within fli« lea, Lllllc* are trembling In tho lonely dell, \. Lulled bv the scented breete, while each frail bell ttstinklluK music seem* a low—o»(.' Kach gentle daisy breathes a sweet perfume MUtrt amaranthine bads' undying bloom. And fair as were the robes of lovely The*, Regal In drew of goM the Held* appear, ftunslihie's soft ray* state through the mist*, to blewn The brooklet winding through the vale of

Or iprak the Joy of some meek flower. And

'Neath spmidtag pines the trembling shadow* brown.

Kcfttlew a*cver-changin# clouds now low-

fro.

my relative, "Very gc keeper "plei

Jt will v.

IE OTJRFC went the

E A S

W E E O E E E

E E E

II E E S Sash,ash.

E E N

LIl'OORAM.

Life's the dav for deed and action Death's the rest, the time of night He who works with satisfaction^

Works while yet the hour is light.',',

The vowels a, e, i, o, u, w, and y, are omitted. Numbered Charade.—Demosthenes, thus: Ten, demon, hen, hosts, Moses, the (definite artico).

Enigma—Water. DIAMOND lU'ZZI.E.

®ifc

snKj

fc 'h-'*

It I. S S I A S

Ble»t to the wens, breathing a prayer UKxtgh lumb, Iu pmuu whtsperlngao grand that I Kane other* heed. And now through leafy screen ftoftly o'ef*pre«dtBg. stray the amber beibns Of nunlkghu felling, proudly, tinging, too. Nature and Nature* |4alns with golden sheen.

RACHEL AND HER CHICKKXR.—There was once a little girl named Rachel Brown, who told her father that she wanted to be of some use in the world.

tpppc-hatttK SATURDAY^ EVENING MAIL. APRIL 8.1871

"Why, what can you do. my llttte uirl?" said Mr. Brown. "Yon most learn to writ© and cipher before you can be of any use."

I can rend a little now," said Rachel "and I shall soon learn to write and cipher. I have plenty of time for play and what I would liko is to do uomethinst useful."

Well, my dear, try and think what vou would like to do, and then come and tell me," said Mr. Brown.

Ko Raehel thought and thought and at last she thought that she would like to take care of the hens and chick-

Mr. Brown was a rich man, and

he had' a nice farm. So, when Rachel told him she would like to take care of the hens and chickens, he said she might do it.

But added he, "you must learn well how to take caro of them." "I know it," said Rachel "I will learn all I can about tho habits of hens, and then do for them what is best."

So Rachel took chargo of the hens and every day she fed them with care. And they had ft good many eggs and her father told her to sell the eggs and keep the money for herself.

Rachel did as her father told her to and as hor father paid all tho cost of keeping tho hons, the ogg money counted up pretty fast.

Rachel had no noed of spending it, for hor father gave her everything that she wanted so she saved it for future use and ten years went by, and then her father lost all his money, and became so 111 that he died.

Rachel was then a young lady and she must do something for a living. So she took the money she had saved up by selling eggs and*hen bought a little cottage, and with it a great many hens.

She knew so well how to take, care of them, and keep them in health, that she soon became famous for the eggs her hens laid and sho made money enough, not only for herself, but for hor mother and vounger sister.

Now, dear little readers, this is a true story and I who write it am Rachel Brown.—The Nursery.

THE ART OF CO USI NINO. A country gentleman lately arrived in town, immediately repair^ to tho house of a relative, a lady, who had married a merchant.

Tho parties wore glad to see him, and invited him to make their house his home, as he declared his intention of remaining in the city onl\r a day or two.

The husband of the lady, anxious to show his wife's relatives every courtesy that he could, took the gentolman's horse to a livery stable.

Finally his visit became a visitation, and the merchant found, after the lapse of livo days, besides lodging and boarding the gentleman, a pretty considerable bill had run up at the livery stable.

Accordingly, he went to the man who kept the liveiff stable, and told him when the gra^kman took his horse he *™,ill. raid the stable-keeper. 1." a short time, the ((ri went to tho stable 5prse to be got ready, was presented to

would pay Very W' "I understa

Aecordin

country gen and ordered The bill, of him.

Oh," sai

tlemaii, "Mr. this." said the stableorder from Mr. as the mon-

^tuahd away

counft1^

vg6fftl'emari

to the

store where the merchant kept. Well," said he, "I am going now." "Are yon?" said the gentleman. "Well, good-by, sir."

Well, about my horse the man said the bill must be paid lor his keeping." Well, I suppose that is all right, sir." ••Yes—well, but you know I'm your wife's cousin "Yes," Ad the merchant, "I know you are, Iyour horse is not."

THE BRITISH TASTE FOR BEER. Tho British taste for beer has been of gradual growth, and has been developed from very small beginnings. In all these things a man naturally goes to Shakespeare. You cannot mention any subject under the sun, but Shakespeare has his say upon that subject. Though Chaucer talks of "a glass of moist and corny ale," and his miller praved for enough good ale, and, indeed, took more than was good for him, yet Shakespeare speaks of that "poor creature small ale and Prince Hal and his followers by no means took kindly to beer. The taste has been a gradual taste, just as tho improvement in beer has been a very gradual improvement. People liked it when brewed, not "small," but strong. The saying soon crops up, "Blessed De her heart, fbr she browed good ale." We find that tho astute statesman Charles James Fox shouted out to the electors, "A mug. a mug!" to popularize himself. The famous Isaac Bickerstaff, when he went to Dick's Coffee-house, asked for "a mug of beer." "I observed that the gentlemen did not care to enter upon business till after their morning draught." Beer is essentially a Hanoverian drink. It is said that it kept the race of Brnnswiek on the throne during tho era of the Pretender. It is a large political influence at the present day, and may be said to have a daily newspaper to represent the beery section of the British mind.

GOOD BREEDING.—^We are all gentlemen and gentlewomen. Any hint to the contrary is a gross insnlt *yet eveiy day we violate the laws of good breeding. Incivilities abound. There must be a radical wrong somewhere. Our mansions and cottages are not all homes of kind feeling and gracious expression, sending out genial currents throughout the whole social system. Too many sit in dingy fustians, with unkempt and slipshod manners at their firesides, and talk barbarisms at their tables, and then put on velvet robes and paradise feathers—dcess coats and snavHy.and go forth—pnissant gentle folks. But their fine feathers will get away on parade, and disclose the coarse habits beneath.

Slang phrases, ridicule, slovenliness, vulgar attitudes and oaths, are admitted under no system of good breeding, and the thoroughbred can. by no possibility, be surprised into them. Avoid them all.—Ex.

A vot'No fellow cmplovod in a store on River street was one clay sent into the cellar to draw a gallon of sperm oil. While waiting he snatched up a piece of chalk, and in a minute was absorbed in sketching the proprietor's profile. The profile on the hogshead was capital. but while the voung artist was absorbed in its purs it tho oil pursued its way over the cellar floor. He was Informed he would not do for a merchant, bnt now be is a first-rate New York •itlsU 1 ttc

A vol man In Ohio recently open* ed a clothing store, and was sent to jail for it. Reason—the clothing store Belonged to another man.

SUBMARINE DO UQHNUTS. Some time ago we read an article whioh described how a doughnut ex-

Eadly

luded in a Wisconsin kitchen, and injured a man who was standing by the store watching it cook.

Wo immediately began a scientific investigation into the explosive qualities of doughnuts, and, after a series of elaborate and costly experiments, we have succeeded in making a patent submarine doughnut which is destined to revolutionize naval warfare.

It is particularly adapted to harbor defence, and we aro now negotiating with tho government for a contract to string a quantity of them on a wire which will be stretched clear across the Narrows, from Fort Hamilton to Staten Island, for the purpose of observing the effect on the first vessel that attempts to come in.

We have calculated that one doughnut—of the submarine kind, of course —will blow a forty-gun frigate from here to Kansas, without change cars.

Secretary Robeson will superintend some further experiments with this discovery at the Navy Yard on Wednesday next.

If the weather is fine he will take one of our submarine doughnuts in each hand and divo deep enough to enable him to fix them to the bottom of a vessel, after which a man will be sent down with a box of parlor-matches to touch them off.

Tho experiment will be strictly private. No reporters will be permitted to go Airther than the end of the wharf, as the Secretary prefers to dive alone.

If our further investigations are successful, we expect to bo able to offer to our country very soon a rod-hot doughnut which will be serviceable for soldiers to carry around in their pockets to throw at the enemy.

We venture to prophesy that if these improvements in destructive engines of war are made as rapidly in the future as they aro being made now, war will become an impossibility.

ANOTHER CONGRESSIONAL SWINDLE. A Louisville paper informs us that Congressmen frank home clothing, »fec., between the covers of disemboweled patent office reports.

This, then, explains a curious circumstance which has puzzled us not a little.

Several weeks ago wo received, under frank of a well-known Congressmen, a volume labeled, "Patent Office Report."

Upon opening it one evening, with the determination to soothe our spirit by calm, undisturbed perusal of the story, we discovered that the volume contained nothing but what appeared to be a shirt and a pair of socks.

Having perfect confidence in the integrity of the patent office, and in the signiture of our Congressional friend, we concluded, finally, that this must be some novelty introduced by the Commissioner of Patents into the form of his reports, so as to give them a sort of variety and attractiveness.

So we sat down serenely to read the shirt, commencing at the back of the neck.

Being rather surpiised to find no words there but the maker's aduerment, we tried to peruse the socks.

They also were letterless. The application of a microscope failed to reveal any report, although it magnified six thousand diameters.

The statement of the Louisville paper explains it all. The Congressmen or his washerwoman can have his apparel by applying to the janitor of the Academy of Natural Sciences.

We deposited it there as a natura curiosity, with a note advancing tho theory that some extraordinary natural cause, the condition of the atmosphere, superabundant electricity, or changes in the Gulf Stream, must haye transformed that patent office report into a shirt and socxs while it was in tho mail, and recommonding the Academy to have experiments made for tho purpose of applying the system to the arts.

We can never look a member of the Academy in the face again—never.

A FUNN DIVORCE CASE. A strange scene was witnessed recently in Justice Baker's court, iu Rockford, 111.

Johanna Friebcrg had complained of Joseph Fricberg for disordely conduct in abusing her,

Johanna stated her case, and then Joseph next did proceed to explain. Ho said he went home to his frau

The Court stopped him and remarked that Johanna was not his wife. "Vat?" cried the astonished man. "Johanna not my wife? Vel, den, I'd liko to know

His honor remarked that she had got a divorce. "Oh, no," replied Joseph, '"she tries it but she did not doit..'

The court produced tho official decree of divorce dated in November last, absolutely divorcing Johanna from Joseph Freiberg. "Mine Gott! is that so?" said Joseph. "Ami free from that voman? And here I've been staying mit her and not know it. Veil, tliat ish great. Mine Got! Hurrah!"

It appears that this is really a fact, that Johanna sued for a divorce and yet continued living with Fricberg.

When the day came on which he was summoned to appear in court, his wife told him not to go, and he did not, and thus a divorce was decreed by default.

Since then they had been living together aw man and wife, same .as before.

Last week, however, Joseph got on little spree, as hedoes occasionally, and went home and missed Johanna, and the result was the arrangement before Squire Baker, when the above scene transpired.

The divorced husband was fined two dollars and costs for disorderly conduct toward his late spouse.

BRET ARTE'S DEFENSE.—Thefollowing letter has been published: "The statement made by the San Francisco News Letter to the effect that certain articles belonging to the Overland Monthly had been furnished to the IAikr Side Monthly by Bret Hnrte, is untrue in every particular. Of the four articles specified by the AVir* letter, three were written and sent tons by regular contributors to this magazine and bad been in our possession several months before they were published. She other came to us in the usual way. Bret Harte had nothing to do with our possession of either of them, and the whole story is false and absurd.

T. T. BROWN,

Editor the Lake Side Monthly

ABSENCE OF MIND.—Macauley remarks that absent-mindedness is the mark of either a genius or a fool. We think that Lord Macaoley was a little on one of its aide*. A man's mind may be so intensely occupied with lofty intuitions and inspirations that his senses, seemingly, are scarcely awake to the realities or the tangible world.

CURIOSITIES OF GEN IUSRELA TING TO INVENTIONS. It must be taken, wo suppose, aa a proof of the versatility of genius, that we always find that tho professions and trades of theso intractable inventors have not tho remotest eonnction with their valuable mechanil, chemical and warlike discoveries. Thus, a clergyman may send breech-loaders and tremendously destructive shells, while the nurseryman and market-gardener proffers improvements in surgical in.strumouts. and the doctor a contrivance for forwarding the ripening of fruit on walls. One grocer demands space for the exhibition of a new axle, applicable to all carriages, anew projectile for ordnance, andajnew method for propelling ships. An M. A. and F, R. G. S. has models of an invulnerable floating battery, a breech-loading gun and carriage, a means of converting guns of old pattern, into broech-loaders, a refuge buoy, a beacon, a cork poncho mattress, a life, limb and treasure preserver, an unfoulable anchor, and somo new scrcw propellers. An accountant asks space for a model of a self-acting wator-closot, with water, motor, and apparatus for regulating the flow of water, all in one the model of an improved theodolite, and an omnitonic flute, all to be shown together! A bookseller seems overflowing with invention, He has a plan of interminable suspension, applicable to bridges, aqueducts, etc., of great span or length, and by which he means to do away with the costly supports hitherto used a target-shooting protector for the safety of those employed to note the score anew paddle-wheel, by which to secure a greater amount of power than is attainable by any other arrangement a self-acting railway signal, for day and night, ana bolts for gates at level crossings, whereby to prevent the gates from being opened while a train is within a quarter of a mile or any convenient distance a safety-spring mining cage, in its ascent or descent, when conveying men or goods up or down the mine shaft, should tho rope or chain break, or become disarranged a new window sash fastening and aoor bolt, by which to attain perfect security, from the impossibility of unfastening them from the outside. A barrister wishes to exhibit two architectural designs a pair of spring-heeled boots, and a drawing of a man equipped with them diagrams of Coryton's system of fairway lighting off the coasts of Great Britain a type-composing machine and hand stamp models and drawings illustrative of Coryton's atmospheric guide propeller, and Coryton's self-adjusting sails. An insurance broker has specimens of wines and otlieiffluids, refined by a new and more effective process, and a model of the apparatus used electric telegraph cables and conductors model of an improved ship, and of parts thereof specimens of improv ed pavements in carriage roads specimens of improvement in iron houses, etc, specimens of building stone, preserved by anew material model of a machine for dressing stone specimens of improved junctions of iron pipes, to prevent breakage specimens of the new description of embroidery specimens of an improved floorcloth. These, likewise, are all fo be shown together.

A MUSICAL MEMOR Y. It "was in London, and in eighteen hundred and eleven. Weber was in a boat in on the river with some ladies, and began to perform on the flute, which he played to great perfection

And that is?" Because it pleases me." "Well, then," said the officer, "take up your flute again, or it will please me "to throw you into tho water."

The composer, seeing that the dialogue was unpleasant to the ladies he was with, gave way, and began ]laying ngftin.

When leaving his boat, however, ho accosted the bold son of Mars, and said: "Sir, tho fear of annoying the people who were with me made me brook your insolence but to-morrow I will have entire satisfaction. We can meet in Hyde Park at ten o'clock. If you have"110 objection wc will fight with swords we need no seconds the quarrel is only between you and me, and it is quite useless to bring in strangers."

Tho officer accepted the challenge. Ho was at the rendezvous at the appointed hour and mot Webor as "agreed upon.

He drew his sword, and put himself on guard, whon Weber presented a pistol at his throat. "Do you wish to murder me?" said the officer.

No," said Weber, "but be kind enough to put up that sword, and to dance a minuet, or you are a dead man."

The officer madosonio objection, but the authoritative and determined tone of Webor seemed to influence him, and notwithstanding the arrival of some people on the scene of action, lie went through what h? wns asked, or rather told to do. "Sir," said tho musician, you compelled me yesterday to play against my wish—I have now' compelled yon to dance against yours. Our bond is over. However, if you should be dissatisfied still, I am quite ready to give vou any satisfaction you may %vish for."

The officer held out his hand, and begged his adversary to honor him with his friendship.

From that moment an attachment sprang up between them, which lasted to the day the illustrious composer died.

MR. JESSE R. GRANT, the President's father, having been very unnecessarily and unmeaningly abused forms aueged interference in certain local appointments at Cincinnati, writes a long letter to the Gazette of that city, in his own vindication. As the subject matter of it Is of purely local interest, its entire reproduction in oun columns would hardly compensate for it§ space. But the concluding sentence is so well put that we cannot refrain from copying it:

I think the papers will not make anything by abusing me, now nearly eighty years old, only because I am the President's father, nor that all of them

Kut

together can cause him to honor is father and mother less in the future than be has in the past, even as God has commanded him."

THIS is the Columbus (Ohio) JournaTs philosophy of the Sumner-Grant broil,: "In politics it is not the emotion of friendship to each other that draws men together it is a feeling of common dislike'for somebody else. Sumner and Thurrnan turned loose on a desert land, would bate each other. And Grant, and Snmner and Tburman b«eom friends."

GIRLS» BOOTS AND SHOES'.

BY DIO LKWISi

But seeing'tliat his boat was followed, by. sixty dollars. Iliad 110 books but 1 JL ...k:au

CJABTJ

closely by another, in which werS sWFeral young officers, he put his flute in his pocket.

Why do you stop playing!" said one of the officers to Weber. For the same reason that I began," replied the composer.

W^JkitatiiPR nt Hi

One evening, at Lexington, I was discussing before the assenuled school the. subject of our fashionable shoes for women, and had been remarking that the soles were uniformly too narrow, when Miss B. spoke up:

Why, Doctor, my soles are perfectly immense. Why, they are twice as broad as my foot."

Miss B., will you be kind enough to take off one of your shoes and send it forward?" It was cheerftilly and quickly done.

Henry, please bring the rule. Now we will measure this sole. ''Miss B., I find this sole is two and one-half inches wide do vou think that your foot is narrower than that?"

On, a great deal. That shoe-sole is twice as wide as my foot." Miss B., will you please como to the platform a moment?" So, limping along, one shoe off and one shoe on, the young lady presented herself.

Miss B., will you be kind enough to p\it your foot on that sheet of white paper? Now hold up the other foot and let your full weight press on this one. There, now hold still a minute, and lot mo draw the pencil around your foot. There, that will do. Now we will measure this mark, and see just how broad your foot is. Why, Miss B., I find that your foot is three inches and three-quarters broad—no, stop, it is three inches and seven eights no, stop again, it really is four inches broad. Now, what do you think? You may take the rulo and measure it yourself if you doubt it. The solo is two and a half and your foot is four inches broad."

But, Doctor, it is four inches broad" only when it is spread out by standing my whole weight 011 this one foot."

Yes, Miss fi,., but that is oxactly what takes placo every time you step. For example, when in walking, you lift your whole weight is not onlv on your left foot, but, pushing with tlie left foot in propelling the body forward, vou have, in addition to your weight upon that foot, the effort of pushing forward with it, which makes the toes still broader, and that takes placo evfcry time you step. So I presume, when j'ou aro walking briskly, that if your foot was at liberty to spread, it would reach four inches'and a quarter. This shoe-solo, which you think is immense, is two inches and a half wide. Now, what do you supposo becomes of the inch and a half of loot which has 110 solo to rest upon? Either the upper holds tho foot and prevents its spreading, or tho loot spreads on either side beyond the solo, and on either side of it. "Very few girls walk In a firm, strong way. Notice one. You see that sho is balancing upon a narrow sole. There is an unsteadiness, a.sidowise vibration. Besides, as she lias not breadth of too enough, she cannot push her body forward in that elastic way which wo all admire. Again, tho pressure of the upper leather chocks tho circulation in the foot, and makes it cold. Tho tight shoe, with an elastic worn about the leg just bolow tho knee, so checks the circulation in tho foot, that the groat majority of girls have cold feet. It would be rare to lind ono with warm feet like a boy's."

A LEGAL GREENHORN. A lawyer from Indiana thus details his first visit to the city: "I commenced tho practice of the law at Greensburg. At tho expiration of tho first year, with economy, I had laid

¥ttefetatues of tho State and a Bible, and I concluded to go to Cincinnati and purchase some law hooks. I had then never worn any clothes but linsey, and 110 hat but wool, which would not do to go to the city in. I ordered tho host suit tho country afforded. In about a week the clothes camo home the hat was made of coon fur, and out of mere curiosity I weighed it, and it weighed six pounds and a quarter My coat and pants were of home-made eloih, colored with butternut. Thus equipped, 1 started on horseback for the citv, at which I arrived afler two days' ride. I put up my horse, and strol'ed around to seo the sigbts. Tho rain had soaked my hat, ana the brim fell down around my face, and the water ran off the heels of my boots in two small butternutcolored streams.

In a short time I found the boys following me. To avoid them, I went into a store at one door and caino out at another door, and I thought Iliad missed them, when, to my surprise, a little fellow poked his head around tho corner, and halloood, 'Here he goes and they wore all alitor mo again. I concluded tliis would never do, so I wont into ajew store and purchased an entire new suit, and when 1 camo out tho boys did not know me. "I had a friend in Covington whom I wished to visit. Tho ferry-boat not being quite ready to start, I lay down on a bench, and tno day being hot, and much fatigued with mv ride, I fell into a dose. When I had arrived at tho other side of the river, as I supposed, 1 gave the ferryman a dime out of which to take my faro. He started back in surprise, and told mo that my faro was thirteen dollars and twenty-five cents! And, sure enough, I lay asleep on that bench six hours, during which time tho ferry-boat had crossed two hundred and neventy-flvc times, and each time tho ferrvman had marked it down with chalk on the top side of the boat over my head!

r'I

returned home without my books, and have never visited the iiy since,"

MrSICAND WASHING. Some people exercise considerable ingenuity in obtaining their "board." Some beg for it, some work for it, some steal it, and others advertise and strike the cat-gut for it. In looking through the advertising columns of the morning journals we found the following:

A ladv wishes to give lessons in French "and music in exchange for board. Address Madame de P., office.

A.—Wanted a laundress who is willing to take pay for her work in "lessons upon the guitar.' Of course she would have it done at home. Picture "Sol Fa" seated upon a wooden bench twang-twanging the strings of his guitar.and the washerwoman keeping tnno on the washboard, lieroare two artists one gives lessons in French to pay for her dinner, the other gives lessons 011 the guitar t» pay for his washing. Surely tho musical market must le fiat. Madame "P" we think, may succeed in her enterprise, but wc do not believe music has sufficient charms to fascinate a washerwoman so she will fall into "Sol Fa's" net.—N. Y. Star.

BRJOITAM YOUNO'S delegate in Congress is sharp enough to meet his unsaintly associates in that body half way in any little encounter of wits they may choose to see. "How many wives have you, now ono of them asked him. the other day. "Enough to keep me from rutin ing* after other people's, he promptly replied. The questioner forthwith retired to the lobby "to see a man."