South Bend News-Times, Volume 37, Number 336, South Bend, St. Joseph County, 1 December 1920 — Page 15

THE SOUTH BEND NEWS-TIMES

TVEDVrSDAY MORXTXG, DEnM DER X. 132)

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THE FOOL KILLER By o. henry

Io-wn outh whrnfvrr any one I'f rp?trat a som particularly nunumerital piece cf fuuli.hnr5.s tveryli!y fiys; 'Vcnl f - r Jc-fv Holm a." Je .-. Holrr.p i tho Fool KliKr. 'f tour: is a. myth, likf Ünnta l'i.üis :intl Jack i rosi and (Jen. lro ;unty and all tho? concrete1 ( ono",tion8 that are. su s-'-i! to rprer.t an idea that Nature h'-s filled to embody. The wi? ft of the southor.c-rs c'rir.ot te'l yoj whence.

Mini1.-) ino r 'ui i iiiri n iian.i- , u u i t

few and happy art- the household" from the Koanake to the Itio lande In which the name of Je-s

tion of rin t: r. ration, brgirnin at j

i 'i i' r v. K. K rn r'n f.ithnr wm worth a couof riiillionr. Ho w.n uiiii.ni; to t md for art. but h drew tri- Ur.o at the factory -irl. f-'o K'rr.'r d.sIr.herifed his father and walked out to a cheaj studio and lived cfn s-au-tiecs for hre-ikf.ist and on I'arrorl lor dinner. Farmni had the artistic

ar.d t and

The waiter brought it and poured the a: r sdowly over the ice in tti" lripiK r. "It lo. ks exactly like the Mississippi riv r water in the bi bend la low Natchez," said I, fa.-mated, i;;i2.riK at the he-muddled drip. "lucre are such llaü for eight dollars a week," said Kerner. "You are a fool," taid I. and be-

po-:y, nicdy adju:eJ.

So:i;etirn eKrner Hold a pi' ture rir.i; and a doz ri 5il't cravats, and tD n.ilPor.s pouft count. One evening Kmcr had me to linm r with hin.-. If and the factory

.'oln,M has not been pronounc-d cr irI- inf' w " to b; married as invoke. AlwavH with a smile, and on as Kt rr.er could slosh paint often witli a f.-ar, is ho Mimmoned ; I'rr.mbly. A for the ex-fathers

to his .fficiai duty. A busy man midion i our :

Jeso llolnii'S.

I ronifnil-r the clfir picture, of! halfway pretty, ar.d as n?uch at her Mm that hunt: on th walls of my ,,,vc ,n Urtt heap cafe as though f .ncy during my barefoot dava when I v'''r'' in the Palmer House, I was dodifintr hi oft-threatened I Chicago, with a souvenir spoon allevfdrs. To me he uas a terrible ready .-afdy hidden in her shirt o!d man. in irrar clothes. With a ! wai.st. She was natural. Two

r.tur-ed, k'ray beard, and red-

t line of (T'"lit for paint-i pan to sip th nitration. "What you

need," 1 continued, "is the official attention of one Jcsw- Holmes." Kerner, not being a southerner, did not comprehend, f-o he sat, sentimental, fUuriiis; on his Hat in his

you not utter one squeak in your own defence?" "You are drunk," paid Kerner hcartlrcs:y. "So one addressed nie." "The destroyer of your mind," Raid I, "stood above you Just now and marked you for his victim. You are not Mind or deaf." "I recognized no such person," Raid Kerner. "I have seen no one but you at this table. Sit down. Hereafter you shal lhave no more absinthe drips." "Wait here," paid I, furious; "if you don't care for your own life, 1 will save It for you." I hurried out and overtook the man in frray half-way down the block. Ho looked as I had s-en him

on the wall immediately below the

She was a wonder. Small and c ilii; had begun to move, traver-

1'inir,

dish, fierce eyes. I looked to see hirn como stumping up the road in u cloud of dust, with a white oak ftafl In his hand and his shoes tic J with leather thonps. I may yet l;it this is a ntory. not a sequel. I have taken notice with regret, that few stories worth reading1 hav: been written that did not contain dr.nk of soum fort. Down go th-j Huids, from Arizona Dick's three :!ir,'?is of red plzen to the lneficacious Oolong that nerves Lionel Montns; or to re para tee in the "iJotty Dialogues." So, in njch pood company I may introduce an absintho tlrop one absintii drip. dripped through a silver dripper, orderly, opalescent, cool, green-eyed deceptive. Kerner was a fool. Tierldes that, he -was an artist and my good friend. Now, if there is one thing on earth utterly despicable to another, It is an artist in the eyes of an author who? torjr he has Illustrated. Just try it once. "Write a story about a mining camp in Idaho. "S 11 it. Spend the money, and then six

months later, borrow a quarter (or

a dime), and buy the magazine containing It. You find a full page wash drawing of your hero. Black Hill, the. cowboy. Sorno-where In your Htory you employed the word "hon-." Aha! the artist has grasped the ideru Iilack Hill has on the r filiation trousers of the M. F. H. of th" Westchester County Hunt. II; carries a parlor rifle, and wears a nonoele. In the distance is a section of Fortyccond Rt. during a s arch for a lost pa.s pipe, and the Taj Mahal, the famous mausoleum in India. Knouch! I hated Kerner, and one clay I met him and we became friend?. He was young and gloriously melancholy because his spirits wer ho high and lifo had so much In store fr him. Ye, he was almost riotously sad. That was his youth. When a man begins to be hilarious In a sorrowful way you ran bet a million that he is dyeing Iiis hair. Kerner's hair wa.s plentiful and carefAlly matted as an artist's thach should be. He was a e'prar teur, and he audited hi dinrers with red wine. Hut, most of all. he was a fool. And, wl--el3. I envied him, and listened patiently whi he knocked Yelanuez and Tintoretto, Once he told me that .. liked i story of mine that he hid oj:ne across in an anthology. 1 1 df!-rribd it to me, and I was sorry that Mr. Fitz-James O'Prln v is dead and could not larn of the Mili.ty of his w(rk. ut mostly K-nor made few breaks and was a consistent fool. I'd better explain what T mean by that. There wa.s a girl. Now, a ciil. as far as I am concerned, is a thing that belongs in a seminary or nn album: but I conceded the existence of the animal In order to re

tain Kerner's friendship

s JJ o -exactly

things I noticed about her

daily. If r belt buckle was

in the middle of her back, and she didn't t li ns that a lar-f" man with a ruby stickpin had follow, d her up all th way from Fourteenth st. Was Kerner Rich a fool? I wondered. And then I thought of the quantity of striped cuffs and blueglass beads that two million dollars can buy for the heathen, and I said to myself that he was. And .he Klise -ertainly that was her name

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sordid, artistic way, while I gaied t in my fancy a thousand times truinto the green eyes of the sophiati- culent, gray and awful. Ho walked cated Spirit of Wormwood. with the white oak staff, and but for Presently I noticed casually that the street-sprinkler tne dust would a iinn.t.sinn of bacchantes limned have been flvinir under his tread.

I caught him by the sleeve and steered him to a dark angle of a buildiny. I knew he was a myth, and I did not want a cop to see me conversing with a vacancy. for I might land in Hellevue minus my silver matchbox and diamond ring. "Jesso Holmes," said I, facing him with apparent bravery, "I know you. I have heard of you all my life. I know now what a scourge you have been to your country. Instead of killing fools you have been murdering the youth and genius that are necessary to make a people live and prow great. You are a fool yourself, Holmes; you began killing off the brightest and best of your countrymen three generations ago, when the old and obsolete standards of society and honor and orthodoxy were narrow and bigoted. You proved that when you put your murderous mark upon my friend Kerner the wis-est chap I ever knew in my life." The Fool-Killer looked at me grimly and closely. "You're a queer Jag," said he, curiously. "Oh, yes; I see who you are now. You were sitting with him at the table. Well, if I'm not mis

taken, I heard you call him a fool, too." "I did." said I. "I delight in do

ing so. It is from envy. By all the

tray n.au a ü.ec.e ar.d besuught him: ' Good .Vr. b ooi-ivl.itr, pica-sv doat iwU i.d.o i-ciiic-r. V hy can't jod go bacK south ar.d ki.l CunbJt&sii.ea aiid ciay-iulcis a.iu let us Aiua.' V iiy Uoa't you gj up on i iKli Avu.ui ar.d iu.i laii.lui. aires i.'.a. kt'p li.t-.r li.uaey ii-meu up und vuii i let jujiig iou. a many betuau one o; e:u lives uu lim vrui;g atrfcel? Come, and have a driiiA, jeoe. Will yuu riter get cnlo your juo ."

io you know this girl that your

KEIF EXPEDITION IN MEXICO FORMED TO HUNT DIAMOND MINE

tool

"and

sn.g the room irom right to leit in a gay and spectacular pilgrimage. I did not conhde my discovery to Keiner. The artistic temperament is too high-strung to view deviations from the natural laws of the art of kalsominlng. I flipped my sinthe drip and rawed Xvormwood. One absinthe drip is not much but I Raid again to Kerner, kindly: "You are a fool." And then, in tho vernacular: "Jesse Holnes for jours." And then I looked around and saw the Tool Killer, ns he had always appeared to my imagination, sitting at a nearly table, and regarding us with his reddish, fatal, relentless eyes. lie was Jesso Holmes from top to too; he had the or.g, gray, ragged beard, the gray clothes of ancient cut, the executioner's look, and the dusty shoes of one who had been called from afar. His eyes were turned fixedly upon Kerner. I shuddered to think that I had invoked him from his assiduous southern duties. I thought of Hying, ;md then I kept my &eat, reflecting that many men had escaped his ministrations when it seemed that nothing short of an appointment as amba.sador to Spain could save them from him. I had called

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rhowel me her picture in a locket

sh was a blonde or a brunette I have forgotten which. She worked in a factory for tight dollars a ek. I st factories quote th:-; wace bv r-r.v of vou'ir-Mion. T will nd 1 ' - . i ..' i. ' .,..'.1 .. yerj to reach that ruprem.o eleva

tobl us, merrily, that the brown spat on her waist v;u caused by her landlady knocking at the door while .she (the irl confound the Knglish language) was heating an iron over the gas jot. and Ehe hid the iron under the bedclothes until the coast was clear; and there was the piece of chewing gum stuck to it when she bean to iron the waist, and well, I wondered how in the world the chewing gum. came to be there don't they ever stop cht?wing it? A while affr that don't be impatient, the absinthe drij is coming now Kerner and I were dining nt Farroms. A mandolin and a guitar were being attacked; the room was full of smoke In nice, long crinkly

layers just like artists draw the I

Htea.in from a plum pudding on e'hristnrn posters, and a lady in a blue silk and g isolinod gauntlets was beginning to hum an air from the Jatskilhx "Kerner." said I. "you are a fool." " )f course," said Kerner. "I wouldn't let her go or. working. Not my wife. What's the use to wait? Shi 's willing. I sold that water color of the Palisades vesterday. We could cook on a two-burner gas s-tovo. o'i know the ragouts I can throw together? Yes, I think we

Hoi will marry next wek.'

Kerner." s.-.id I, 'you are a fool." "Have an absinthe drip"" said Kerner, grandly. "Tonight you are tho guest of Art in paying quantities. I think wo will mt a Hat with a hath." "I never tried one 1 m.ean an absinthe drip," said I.

my brother Kerner a fool and was . standards that you know he is the

In danger of hell fire. That was nothing; but I would try to save him from, Jesse Holmes. The Fool Killer got up from his table and came over to ours. He rested his hands upon it, and turned his burning vindictive eyes upon Kerner, ignoring me. "You are a hopeless fool," he said to the artist. "Haven't you hart enough of starvation yet? I offer you one moro opportunity. Give up this girl and come back to your home. Itefuse, and you must take the consequences." The Fool-Killer's threatening face was within a foot of his victim's; but to my horror, Kerner made not the .lightest sign of being aware of his presence. "Wo wil be married next week." he me.tered absent-mindedly. "With my st dio furniture and Rome second-hand stuff wo can make out." "You have decided your own fate," said the Fool-Killer, in a low but terrible voice. ."You may consider yourself as one dead. You have had your last chance." "In the moonlight," went on Kerner, softly, "we will sit under the skylight with our guitar and sing away tho false delights of pride and money." "On your own head be It." hissed the Pool-Killer, and my scalp prickled when I perceived that neither Kerner's eyes nor his ears took the slightest cognizance of Jesse Holmes. And then I knew that for some reason the veil had been lifted for me alone, and that I had been elected to save my friend from destruction at the Fool-Killer's hands. Something of the fear and wonder of it must have showed itself In my face. "I Ixense me," said Kerner, with his wan. amiable smile; "was I talking to myself? I think it is getting to be a habit with me." The Fool-Killer turned and walked out of Farroni's. "Wait here for me." said I, rising; "I must speak to that man. Had you no answer for him? Hecause yen are a fool must you die like a mouse under his foot? Could

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most egregious and grandiloquent and gorgeous fool in all the world. That's why you want to kill him." "Would you mind telling me who or what you think I am?" asked the old man. I laughed boisterously and then stopped suddenly, for I remembered that it would not do to be seen so hilarious in the company of nothing but a brick wall. "You are ejsse Holmes, the FoolKiller," I said, solemnly, "and you aro going to kill my friond Kerner. I don't know who rang you up. but If you do kill him I'll see that you get pinched for it. That Is," I added, despalrlnglv. "if ran a coP to see you. They have a poor eye for mortals, and I think it would take the who!" force to round up a mvth murderer." "Well." said the Fool-Killer, "briskly, "I must be going. You had better go home and sleep it off. Good-nlsht." At this I was moved by a sudden fear for Kerner to a softer and more pleading mood. I leaned against the

frieni tins made himself a uboutV" ucnt'J tne i'ool-lviller. "'I liuvo tile honor.' buid i.

that's why I called Kerner a fool, lie is a tool because he has wailed so long beioiu liiiurying ner. lie is a foul because ii oit-a wa..lng in the. hopes of getting the concent o: some absurd two-million-

doliar-focd parent or something of tho borU" ".iyoe," said the Fool-Killer "maybe 1 I might have looked at' it ciiiierc ntly. Would you mind going Lack to the restaurant and bringing your inend Keiner here?" 'Mjh, What's tho use, Jesse," I yawned. "Ho can't see you. He didn't know you were talking to him at tho table. You are a lictitious character, you know." "Maybe ho can this time. Will you go fetch him?" "Ail right." said I, "but I've a suspicion that you're not strictly sober, Jess. You seem to be wevering and losing your outlines. Don't vanish betöre I get back. I went back to Kerner and said: "There's a man with an invisible homicidal mania waiting to see you outside. I .believe he wants to murder you. Come along. Y'cu won't see him so there's nothing to be frightened about." Kerner looked anxious. "Why," said he ,"I had no idea one absintho would do that. You'd better stock to Würzburger. I'll walk home with you." I led him to Jesse Holmes's. "Rudolph." said the Fool-Killer, "I'll give in. Hring her up to the house. Give me your hand, boy." "Good for you, elad," said Kerner, shaking hand3 with the old man. "You'll never regret it after you know her."

MEXICO CITY. Nov. 20. The legendary diamond miries in the state of Guerrero which, ever since the days of Fmperor Iturbida, have been sought for by the curious, are again the si;bect of animated discussion here. A well-known Mexican geologist recently returned from a tour of exploration of the state and, according to the newspapers, asserted he had located tho lost mines. Exploring parties are nowsaid to be in the process of organization. Gen. Guerrero, after whom the state was ns.-nei, is credited with

ha ir.g disroered the

more than ; a rs ag' ing to Krr.percr IturM n gems of immens- v .'u--. t eraj died, howev- r, .vithout ing the location ui the triast wild re-'ioTVs of that sparse! hated state hao from time been explored in an ct'ort the mines.

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Then You

A man may enjoy running into debt, but he doesn't show any e'ee over being dragged out bv the sheriff.

A useful gift for the housewife is in clarification 6 -a of today's paper.

Try XEITS-TIMES JT ant Ads

inUlikK Ur o bnlLuKtN

Hae Something Ut

Ix-arn. Thousands who have piles have r.'it learned that quick and permanent relief ran only b arcotn pli.-hed wi:h internal mellcine. Neither cutting ncr any amount of tritrr.nt with ointments and suppositories will remove the cause. Had circulation ra- piles. There is a complete stagnation of blood in the lower bowel and a weakening of the parts. Dr. J. S. Lieonhardt wi.s first to find the remedy. His prescription 1 IIKM-ROID. a tablet medicine, taken internally, that is r.ow sold by druggists irenirr.liy. Ir. Lcor.hardt tried it in 1.000 cases with the marvf-loui record of success in PS per cent, and then decided it should be sold under a rigid money-back guarantiee. Don't waste any mere time with o'!t;.'.o ni.jdicants. Get a packafr HKM-r.OIH frni wttl"k'n Cut IUtt In:z Store to.'.iy. It i-a? piven K.ife anl lasting relief to D.'.-.imikIh of peopl, nnd fhonM d the f.in:e frr you it fldom fails. Advt-

South Bend Woman Suffered Such Agony at Times She V ould Cry Tanlac Restores Health.

Give the auto owner something

for his car. See classification 6 4-A

In tho Want Ad section.

Cured His RUPTURE

I was badly rurdured hile lifting .i trunk several years :i?o. Doctors said my only hope of cure was an iteration. Trusses did nie no srood. rinally I get hold of something that pikkly and completely cureo. me. Years hnve passed und the rupture has never returned, although I nia doing bard work .is a rnrpenter. There was no operation, no lost time", no trouble. I huve nothing to sod. but will give full Information about how you mav Und a complete cure without operation, if you write to me. Kugen. M. I'ullen. Carpenter. Marcellus Avenue, Mnnasqunn. N. J. Better cut. out this notice and show it to any others who are ruptured you may save a hie or at least step the misery of rupture nnd the worry aud danger of an operation. Adv.

"When I think of all the saiffering I had to endure, and that I'm now well and strong and able to do all

my housework without an ache or pain, I just cin't help but praise Tanlac," said Mrs. Susan Weise, of 12S X. Birdsell Ave., South Bend. Ind. Mrs. Weise Is the mother of eight children. "I suffered dreadfully for several years before I got Tanlac. and got so bad off I just had to have someone to do my housework and look after mo, and life became a burden. I had no appetite, and w hat little I did eat caused me to suffer with indigestion and bloat until it affected my heart beating-. My kidneys bothered me a gnat deal, and my back ached terribly. I had rheumatism so bad I could hardly stand it, and at

night would just have to lie propped up in a chair. Why. many a night I was in such agony I would Just cry. and wonder if I would have to suffer like this for the rest of my life. "My husband brought home a bottle of Tanlac one night after someone had recommended it to him, and although I had tle hopes of it helping me I began taking the medicine. Well, to my surprise I began improving right along, and now since taking four bottles I never had a better appetite in all my life, and everything agrees with me perfectly. That awful rhcumatisinha.s en

tirely disappeared. I never have an j ache or pain, .and just sleep like a j child every night. I now do all my housework with the greatest ease. !

and certainly have a warm spot in my heart for Tanlac for the wonderful health it has given me." Tanlac is sold in "South Rend at the Central Drug Store. Public Drug Store, London's Pharmacy and Wc-t-tick's 7 it Kate Drug Stnro and in Mishawaka at the lied Cross Pharmacy. Adv.

Rainbow Transfer Company For Prompt Service CALL OfHce Res. Lincoln 5350 Main 2750 Motor Truck Transportation We do all kinds of moving and hauling in the shortest time possible and "OUR RATES ARE LOW" 535 S. Taylor SL South Bend, Ind.

Why not photo Fupplie for the amateur photographer? See chilMration Oi-A in toda's Want Ad section.

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The Old Way

The New Way

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ANTHONY HOTE.L

fori W.y

I'll '

fiANXINTON HOTEI-,

Leaving Ft. Wayne, you'll find a room at Toledo From one Keenan city to another reservations are always made gratis for our guests. And the same courteous treatment will follow you to accommodations just as complete. While you, or your family, or friends, ore with us, you are really our guest. We aim to demonstrate real service where other hotels leave off. Wo know that through this plan alone we are assured your patronage throughout the years. Specify TCecnan Hotels on

your itinerary and rec-

Tl ommend them to your friends. y

KEE

HOT EI

Milwaukee Ft. Wayne -Toledo'

TEM

Making Clean Kitchens Cleaner Here is the ideal kitchen table top American women have been waiting for easy to clean, unbreakable and wonderfully attractive in appearance. Fits the wooden table top you are now using. You can put it on your wooden kitchen table in a few minutes and tho price is within the reach of the most modest purse.

REN7AM1N fiYSillL

TABLE TOPS "As Clean as a Porcelain Platter" Benjamin Crysteel Table Tops (Porcelain Enameled Armco Iron) arc lustrous white, smooth as glass, strong as steel, stainless, not affected by heat or cold and will neither crack, chip nor craze. A few strokes with a damp cloth and it is wholesomely clean again. The perfect surface for rolling out ple-crust and other pastry. For the first time these dealers have stocks ready for you. But don't wcJt Order Yours Today from one of these Storey A. H. Holler Furniture Co., 1 16 S. Michigan St. Ries Furniture Co., 306-310 S. Michigan St. Ellsworth Store, 11-117 N. Michigan St. Swanson-Lee Furniture Co., 3 1 8 S. Michigan St. F. C. Reimold 6: Co., 125 N. Main St. Ceo. H. Wheelock & Co.. 1 1 3 W. Washington Av. O. W. Shaffner, 127 W. Jefferson Blvd. Made and guaranteed by the BENJAMIN ELECTRIC MFG. CO. Chicago

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WAR DEPARTMENT CANNED MEATS

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Another well-placed blow in the Government's relentless crusade to put 100 cents back m your dollar. The last great food release to relieve the price tension was met with a wave of enthusiasm that has swelled into an incessant demand for MORE and still iMORE as the delightful qualities of this food are revealed at the lunch and dinner tables of the nation. Housewives, cooks and chefs have discovered dozens of delicious ways of preparing these WAR DEPARTMENT CANNED MEATS. in their most simple form they are universally conceded by food experts of all nations to be the finest, most wholesome and tasty foods ever prepared by a nation for its fighting forces. ASK YOUR DEALER What Is He Doing About It? There are thousands like yourself who want to share in this great money saving. Let your dealer know about it He can quickly get a shipment from the nearest Depot Quartermaster, and HE will, if he sincerely wishes to save YOU money and wants your good will and patronage. If he has bought you will see in his window the sign of UNCLE SAM attacking the High Cost of Living. If it isn't there, he may not have seen this notice. Why not cut it out and show it to him today? HERE ARE THE WHOLESALE PRICESMINIMUM ORDER ACCEPTED $250.00 coilvkd bi:i:f So. 1 enns 1.1c prr nvn No. 2 eanu 27c prr mit 1 lb. can lHc pr ran t Iba. caus Sl.bO pr rn coii.i:i) iji:i:f ii.sii 1 lb. cans 15c p-r can 2 lb. cans 30c per cm TABLE OF CONTENTS : The discounts to apply on all purchisea of surplus cuncM meats on and iftr Kor. l'th. 1020, are as follows: $250.00 to S1.000 Not S2.501.00 to $4,000 lOfc $1,091.00 to $2,r0O 5Tc S 1.000 1 und vir 20c Oa fu'.l cor'oai Wa. etlpped at governpnt ripen? If ralü r full carload ! leis ttan fl.COLOO, tben discount will be allowed on tLe value of tLe carl&ad. CUMULATIVE PURCHASES COUNT To stimulate purchases of carload lots o promote nr In lirjr juantltif-, further discounts as follows are authorized to customs orderlc? cr r-prderlr: ? in carlci! Ictn. tl Talue of nil purebace r,f caDn-l meats maJ" oa or aftr November 15, ll'-'J, enly, t j b conildered In connection wlta the tcalo of discounts, as t oliowi : Wlicn purcliase8 reach SÖ0.001 21 To Net to Prevail Wlien I'Tirchasi's n ach S100.OO1 28 fc Nt to IrfaJl "When I1irchaves lU-ach $."00,ooi 320 Xet to Preail When Purc-liases Ilcach $1.000,001 and over S3& Xct to Prevail Tfc fore?oinff ineins tbat tbe tot-U purcSaae by a restorer in carload lota frora t!c to time will te taken into consideration an i tLe proper discount applied ca the eua of all tt? purcnaaea, Including the first carload lot. SEND ORDERS TO NEAREST DEPOT QUARTERMASTER at the following addresM': New York City, 4C1 8th Avenue, Atlanta, Ga, TranTortArioa TllAg.

Boston, 3hxss., Arniy Supply Base. San Antonio, Tex. Chicago, IU., 1819 AYest 30th St. San IYanckco, Calif. CHIEF, SURPLUS PROPERTY BRANCH Office of the Quarten nasUT General MUNITIONS BUILDING WASHINGTON, I. C,