Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 41, Number 126, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 3 December 1909 — Needless Noise. [ARTICLE]

Needless Noise.

The celebrated soprano was in the middle of her goto when little Johnny said to his mother, referring to the conductor of the orchestra: Why does that man hit at the woman with his stick?” “He is not hitting at her,” replied his mother. “Keep quiet.” “Well, then, what is she hollerin’ so for?” —Success. “I don’t believe you’d work if your life depended upon it,’’ snorted the angry housewifdf “And dat’s where yer do me a great injustice mum,’’ responded the tall tramp blandly. ‘Tf I could have conditions as I’d like dem, I’d work all de time.’’ “And how is that?” “Why, I’d like to shovel snow down in Florida and run a lawn mower up in Alaska, mum.”