Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 41, Number 57, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 2 April 1909 — Some Poor Orthography; And Other Blunders. [ARTICLE]

Some Poor Orthography; And Other Blunders.

The life of a county school superintendent is a busy one and especially during the examination and manuscript grading period. It is" also quite monotonous as paper after paper is read that treats with dull monotpny of the same subject. But there is occasionally some variety to relieve the dull grind, for some of the pupils do not answer just as they should and the manuscript grader gets a good laugh occasionally. Thus, Superintendent Lamson has recently discovered some very amusing errors while grading the papers both of the township graduates and the teachers. One spelling paper contained the following misspelled words: aganest for against cowerd for coward wheather for weather thoes for those grees for greece befor for before dos for does — — dephthira for diphtheria whooping cought for whooping cough. />.

In a recent teachers’ examination, however, one young lady who aspires to be an instructor of the young idea gave a startling reply to the question, “What is the cause of consumption?” Medical scientists will marvel at the intelligence of this aspiring pedagogue who wrote that “Consumption is caused by a mosquito that standson its head when it bites.” Tubercular students will please sit up and take notice of the theory advanced by Miss Jasper County as the cause of diseased lungs and then get at the very root of the white plague evil by quarantining against these acrobatic mosquitos. Yellow fever has long been believed by medical men to be carried by the mosquitos from the sick room and the germ deposited wherever the little pest next stuck his bill but the drill billed wingster had never before been accused of causing consumption. And his attitude while biting, that of standing on his head with his summer gown dangling about his wings and his lower extremities exposed, that is disgraceful and should the board of health fail to stop the varmint then the civic federations and society of morals should take a hand. Here is what another aspiring teacher writes in response to the question, “What is the spinal column?” “The spinal column is an opening in the back bone extending from the neck to the other end of the backbone.” Shades of anatomy. Where are these teachers acquiring their knowledge of the human body? They are on a par with the New Jersey superintendent who explained to the pupils that the vermiform appendix was a continuation of the back bone, which becoming bruised resulted In inflammation that caused appendicitis.

So it seems that there is a little comedy in the life of a school superintendent and his usually silent study may resound with a peal of merriment at the very ridiculousness of some of the answers given to the paper? he grades.