Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 41, Number 51, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 March 1909 — Page 7

How to Cure Your Piles

Dae Often To Carelessness or Neglect and Stubborn to Core "The knife Is not always necessary to cure even desperate cases of piles," says a physician whose years and experience make him An authority.' "Indeed," he says further: "I have known some very aggravated cases of long standing cured by a simple home remedy that restored to the bowels easy natural dally movements." And the doctor Is right, as many letters from oured people in various parts of the country prove. If sufferers from piles, rectal tumors and ulcers would try Or. Caldwell's Syrup Pepsin they would often save themselves the terrible pain and danger and the heavy expense of a severe surgical operation. (Piles are often due to constipation and are always aggravated by it. Easy natural movements of the bowels such as are invariably produced by this famous laxative without pain or gripe do. much to restore a normal, healthy condition to the bowels and thus cure piles. M. H. Miller, Moweaque, 111, says: "I have been troubled all my life with piles brought on by constipation. I tried many doctors and numerous remedies, but found no relief until I used Dr. Caldwell’s Syrup Pepsin. I have used it as a laxative and stomach remedy for 'the past nine years and have no more troubles with piles." H. N. John, Minneapolis, Kan., says he suffered for four years with piles which were so bad that he could not work. Four bottles of Dr. Caldwell’s Syrup Pepsin cured him, and he says be has not been bothered'since. I Dr. Caldweirs Syrup Pepsin is a safe sure remedy for constipation, restoring easy natural dally movements in the worst old chronic cases, yet so mild and pleasant to take mothers give it to their babies with splendid results. It is sold by all druggists at 60c and (1.00 per bottle. Pepsin Syrup Co., 302 Caldwell Bldg., MontlceUo, 111., will send a free sample to has not used it and will glve“tf a\fair trial.

BY A. F. LONG.

SOLD

THE STANDARD REMEDY FOR ALL FORMS OF ■ RHEUMATISM I LUMBAGO, SCIATICA, NEURALGIA, KIDNEY TROUBLES, I CATARRH, ASTHMA and KINDRED DISEASES | GIVESQUICK RELIEF I Applied externally It affords almost In- B slant relief from pain, while perman- Ms entresults are being effected by taking ■ it internally, purifying the blood, dls- ■ solving tbe poisonous substance and ■ removing it from tbe system. gs DR. O. L. GATES ' Hancock, Mina., write*, f “ A little girl here had such a weak book H canted by Rheumatism and Kidney Trouble ■*’ that abe could not stand on her feet. The I moment they put her down on the floor she Ml would scream with pains. I treated her with mi "S-DROPB” and today she nine around as well Rf and happy aa can be. I preecrlbe “» DROPS” B tor my patients and uee It lu.»y practice.” A TEST “6'DROPS” I FREE If you are suffering with Rheum&ttsm, B Lumbago. Sciatica, Neuralgia, Kidney MB Trouble or any kindred disease, write ■ to us for a trial bottle of "6-DROPS.” Ms " 5-OROPS ” Is entirely free from B opium, cocaine.morphine, aloohol.laud- If anum and other similar ingredients. ■ Large Size Bottle "8-DROPS" <3OO Do***) B SI.OO. For Sale by DrugglaU. M SWANSON RHEUMATIC CURE COMPANY ft D**L SO, 174 Laka Street. Chicago

What Would You Do If three good physicians should pronounce your case hopeless. If they should decide that, you could not live longer than six weeks. And if you should get well, after lining''only $12.00 worth of Dr. Miles’ Heart Cure and Nervine, what would you advise a friend in like condition to dos •1 hat* to thank you for mrtitf sum WMn&zF-dsiM’ third doctor, like tho two previous once, said that nothin* could be dona for her; that aha had natter be taMM home from tho hospital to quietly weH har time which would not ba over 4 waaka at the most. I brought har home, and' than I thought probably Dr. Miles' Heart Curs and Nervine might help her, ao I got a bottle of each and tome Narva and J.lver rills and oommcnoed to give them to ban We soon aeon an improvement, and encouraged by this we continued siring the medicine. We gave her elevea » pottlea la all of the medicine. Ha takes It occasionally now If aha feels the need. I am In tbe ministry, and Sava been for 44 years.” RBTV. P. MILLIGAN. Oenda Barings, Kano. Dr. M(lee* Heart Cura Is fold If year druggist, who will guarantee that the first bottle will benefit. If It ftfi ha will refund your money. Miles Medical Co, Elkhart. Mi

ODD OCCURRENCES.

A celebrated English naturalist relates a comical story of, his first introduction to a turtle/some forty yeafrs ago. There was to be a grand public dinner at a seaside hotel, and the catering being entrusted to a noted cook and purveyor, in honor of the occasion he undertook to provide real turtle soup for the feast. Acoord ingly, a live tiirtle arrived at the hotel a few days before the date fixed for the banquet, and, of course, became the one theme of conversation and astonishment in the neighbor hood. People for miles around flocked to see it, and if the turtle, Ks it lay on its back in a straw-carpeted shed, feebly moving its flippers to and fro, had been a griffin, it couldn’t have attracted more attention. The turtle was not to be killed ; until the morning of the eventful day, but on the preced ing afternoon some bright person suggested to the landlord that it ; was get ting weak, and that it would be all the better and fresher, and reappear to greater advantage in tomorrow’s tureens, if it had a sea bath. -The idea was voted capital, a wheelbarrow was brought, the prospective soup hoisted upon it, with a long line fastened round its shell, and the procession forthwith started for the beach, with half the town in its wake. The barrow was wheeled into the sea and tilted until Its bvirden was launched. Off the turtle paddled joyously, and the rope being paid out to utmost length. After a proper lapse of time, the rope was hauled in, but the loop was empty. The grateful turtle doubtless ste'ered for the West Indies, and ox-tail soup grated the banquet. But 'it was not safe to mention “turtle soup" to the landlord for many a year. ~ .» * • * A traveler recently stopped at a Georgia, hotel, where the landlord had just bought a live wildcat, which was chained in the yard. The traveler had never seen such ah animal before, and ’was rather nervous about its proximity. That night'the landlord went through the house putting out the lights, and the traveler heard the rat* tting of the chains on the lamps as they were lowered to be extinguished. He thought it was the wildcat’s chain, and, as the sound came nearer, he was convinced that the beast had escaped and was prowling through the house. The idea was terrifying. Remembering that his door was ajar, he sprang from the bed, made a dash for the window in his night clothes and jumped to the ground. The proprietor heard the noise, looked out, and, see ing the guest making off, supposed he was "jumping his board” and chased him, the town marshal joining In th< pursuit. The traveler fled in dire dismay for'nearly a mile, when, hearing the footsteps close behind, he attempted to climb a tree and was captured. Then hyitual explanations followed, and thelguest returned to finish his nap. * * * An odd hunting adventure recently a British officer in India. He was mounted on a fleet mule, and was running down a wild boar, intepdlng to lance it, when the animal turned bit the mule’s leg, and then fled again The mule screamed savagely, and in a minute she had deposited the officer on the grpund; then, kicking out-vig-orously five or six times, as if to see that her legs were all right, she started after the‘unfortunate pig at lightning speed, with fury in her ei'p? and vengeance In the crook of her ears. The race was not long, and the Wild boar soon realized that he had exasperated a relentless enemy. He was soon winded, and the mule, coming up with him, caught him by the backbone with her teeth, crunched it and threw him to the ground, and then, before he could rise, kicked him so Vigorously that he was a deal boar in leßs than no time. Then the mule returned to her master and gave utterance to a “hee-haw" of triumph.

SUNFLOWER PHILOSOPHY.

Everybody has a hoodoo these days. Whoever saw a mr.n and wife who were both red headed? ' Tha younger your daughter, the more apt Every woman thinkß the other woman*! troubles could be cured by certain wall mottoes, If they would only read them. A woman doesn’t have nruch respect for her mother’s opinions when she buys her wedding clothes, but she has a great deal when It cornea to taking care of her first baby. If a rich woman la also a man-hater, ahe gives onost grudgingly in* helping some widow with a lot of children, being of the opinion that aucb a woman la only getting her Just deserts for ever getting married. m' ■■ *>■>- » 1 You can often tell how much care and trouble a woman has by the way fehe does her hair. ShO stops wearing It in a loose, fluffy mass on the top of her head II she has to work and worry, and'twists it in a little hard knot that greatly resembles a door knob.-—Atch-ison (Kan.). Globa. Johnny—My pop l> ricber’n your pop. Freddy Mayb# he la, but ha*li never get back the money ha lent my pop.

HOW FLOWERS HIDE HONEY.

Pit# Where Sweets Are Btored in Lily —Concealed Nectar of Monkshood. Before “the bee sucks," as Ariel put it* he must find the wonderful places where the flowers hide away their honey, to be found like the priests' hiding holes in ancient mansions, by the right sort of visitor, and to keep away all intruders. . In the recesses of the crown imperial lily at'the centre can: be seen six large honey* pits, one on every flora) leaf, and each is brlmining over with a big drop. Shake the flower and it “weeps” as the big drops fall from it, soon to be replaced by other tears Ip the rapidly secreting flower. Tlie simple folk call the flower “Job’s tears.” The snowdrop is literally flowing with honey, for in swollen veins traversing Its fragile whiteness are rivers of nectar. The petals of the columbine are Ingeniously and elaborately designed with a view to providing good places ot hiding for the honey. ‘ Each is circular, hollow, shaped like a horn. In each the honey is secreted in a round knob at what would be the mouthpiece end of the horn, and the five are arranged in-a rtng side by side with the honey knobs adoft Though the honey store is obvious from without, yet the insects who would sip It must creep into the flower and penetrate with a long nose up the curving horn to the knob. Sometimes the petals are all joined together into a tube and. the sweet nectar simply exudes from the Inner side of the wall and Collects at the bottom. This is the case in the dead nettle, the tube of which forms so toothsome a morsel that some children call It "suckles." The honeysuckle is similarly planned, and its sweetness is so striking as to have furnished its name. The monkshood has quaint nectaries. If the hood be drawn back there suddenly spring into sight two objects on long stalks which are sometimes like a French horn, sometimes like a cowl, or, looked at sideways, not unlike a pair of doves. Their presence within the hood has provided the nicknames "Adam and Eve” and “Noah’s Ark." Thus the honey bags are carefully flicked away and protected.—Chicago Tribune.

Watching a Hole in the Ground.

“Among the more odd of the city’s many odd occupations,” said a man who finds an interest in such things, “is that which consists in watching a hole in the ground, the hole beiug a cellar excavation in which it is intended later to lay the foundations of a building. Certainly an odd occupation this, and a curious thing about it is that it is followed only at night. “You can see that the employment of such a watchman will prevent accidents. By day, when the digging is going on, there’s always people around, but by night, when the hole is left alone, there must be somebody to look after it. “The last thing the diggers do when they quit for the day is t 6 stand up along the edge of the excavation, at the inner edge of the sidewalk, a scattering row of empty barrels, on the tops of which they put a line of planks, and on top of these planks, If perchance a load or tyo of rough foundation stone has already been delivered, they put some big, rough chunks of stone to keep the planks down. And it te at this stage of the proceedings that the night watchman comes on duty. He surveys ihe hole silently, and then he lights his pipe and his lan tern, and if there are red lghts to be set out he lights them and puts them in place, and then he Is ready to settle down for his night’s work. If the builder has got a shanty on the ground he sits In the door of that and smokes; if no shanty, he may find a barrel to sit on, or he may stand and watch, or he may move slowly about. "And there’ll you’ll find him. come when, as whatever hour of the night, you will. You may not, see him at first as you draw near, but when you oome upon him in the dark or emerging out of a shadow; or you may find him walking slowly; but in whatever manner you find him, •he sever speaks, he is always silent. “You may pass there night after night and oome to know the watcher when you see him, but you never hear his voice. Dark and silent the deep excavation may be, but equally silent and mysterious Is the watcher, as he appears to you in the dim light or dlsappeare in the shadow; and so he keeps vigil nightly,' In what really seems to me one of the oddest of all odd occupations, namely, watching a hole in the ground.—New York Sun.

A Practical Suggestion.

Ik was his first Sunday school, and he sat In the infants’ department eagerly watching the superintendent Illustrate the lesson on the board. The superintendent drew the path to heaven —one straight line —and started the figure of a man on it Gradually the man became larger and larger, an<f finally when he arrived at the gate of heaven he could not get In. The superintendent turned to his smsll audience and In a tragical and sorrowful tope, add; "You see he is so puffed up with sin that he can sot enter in." "Try him sideways, mister, try him sideways," cams the smsll, dbrtll voice from the Intents’ department.— Philadelphia Ledger.

An egg plant—a hen’s nest.

THE SEA OF ARAL.

In Turkestan, due east from the Caspian Sea, lies the Sea of Aral, by come geographers called a lake, although next to the Caspian it is the largest body of water in the steppes of of Asia. The history of this sea is very remarkable, and has been a constant source of perplexity to geographers. - ’ From the northeast the ancient Jax- , artes river pours a volume of water Into this sea, while the Oxus, also a broad and rapid stream, feeds it from the southeast. The sea, however, Is very shallow, so much so that navigation is very difficult. Yet the sea has no visible outlet and is supposed to lose its waters solely by evaporation. There can hardly be an underground outlet, or the water would be fresh. On the contrary, it is brackish, but not sufficiently so to make it undrinkable by flock's and herds. The most astonishing fact, however, in connection with this sea is that it has twice disappeared and reappeared within historical times. This was the case during the Greco-Roman period, and again during the thirteenth and fourteenth centuries, A. D. During these periods, while the site of the sea was dry, the Oxus and Jaxartes emptied their waters into the Caspian. These rivers, by the way, have been christened anew in modern times, and are now called the Amu river and Sir or Syr river. For many years previous to 1870 the maps showed a long, narrow gulf, called the Gulf of Aibur-Ghir extending far southwest as an arm of the sea. v ; ‘ When the Russians made their advance on Khiva, one column marched down the west coast of the Aral Sea, expecting they would have to provide transportation across the gulf before they reached the Oxus and the capital they meant to capture. Much to their surprise, they did not find the gulf or any evidence that a gulf had existed, except a depression in the sand. No one knew where or how it had disappeared. Now a new discovery has given rise to fresh speculation. * * t A little while ago the Russians, fn the course of explorations around the sea, discovered a new lake, the waters of which are sweet, though it has no outlet. It occupies a part of the depression which was found during the KMva campaign, and a uarrow isthmus separates it from the sea. The question Is now how It came there, and, moreover, why its waters are absolutely sweet. In answer to the first question, the most reasonable conjecture seems to be that in recent years, during some great flood, such as the enormous freshet of 1878, when a great mass of.water from the Oxus was diverted far toward the Caspian Sea, a considerable portion of this flood Bwept northwest into the depression of Aibu-Ghir, excavating a channel and throwing up a bar before it, which still separates It from the Aral Sea. As to the sweetness of these waters, the very curious hypothesis by which the slight saiine condition of the Caspian and Aral Seas is explained is also supposed to account for the sweet waters of the new lake. The Caspian and Aral Seas are merely brackTsh. Around their shores are a number of large gulfs, almost land locked, and therefore nearly separated from the seas. The depCh of water in these gulfs is small, and the evaporation is enormous. Curents from the seas are constantly setting into these gulfs. The water never emerges from the sea again, but die pears through evaporation, leaving saline deposits. The Aral and Qaspian Seas, therefore, are constantly losing saline matter deposited in these great inlets, while they are receiving water wi.b very Uttle salinity, and it is supposed that the saline matter receive by the new fresh water lake Is eliminated in a similar manner.

BITS OF HUMOR.

A tip-top resort —the supola. • * • A man of flighty disposition should neves be made the cashier of a bank. • • • When a ship takes her “trial” trip, is dt necessary to rig her with "jury” masts? • * • Excited Passenger —Do these cartrun on time? Phelgmatic Conductor —No; they run on rails. • • • Mary had a little pug, And everywhere would trot him; But she failed to pay bis tax one day, And the dog catcher got him. • » *vr- 1 Planner Hayrick-—How in the name of sense will I keep the crow* outen my Cornfield next spring? They’ve just doubled this season. Agricultural Editor —r That's easy enough, my rural" friend. You put crow bars up all around your field. * • • Pompous Professor (to his class in medical university)—"Tbe patient, you observe, young gentlemen, has one perfect eye, whereas the 6ther Is drawn Inward toward the nose, causing a painful ablyquity of vision. In this Instance you, Mr. Flnkboue, may rise mad tell the class What you would da" MV. Flnkbooe—(after s pause and seriously gazing at the patient)—"! presume I would look Just as crosseyed as he does.”

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’DO it! Defer Not (JntU a Future Day! * to Act Wisely, THE EVER PRESENT IS THE ONE TIME FOR YOU TO DO THINGS, i 'is THEREFORE, YOU SHOULD BEGIN TODAY TO ACQUAINT YOURSELF WITH THE QUALITY OF THE BUILDING TIMBER HANDLED BY US. LET US QUOTE YOU ESTIMATES THE NEXT TIME YOU ARE IN THE MARKET FOR ANY KIND OF BUILDING MATERIAL. Rensselaer Lumiter Company j'- 1 , - Cream Wanted Will pay Elgin prices and remit promptly. Why send your cream to Chicago when yon can sell It in your neighboring town and get a fair, honest test. Mack’s Creamery, Monon, Indiaha. PIONEER Meat - Market J. BIGELSBACH, Proprietor. Beef, Pork and Veal Mutton, Sausage, Bologna lAt Lowest Prices. The Highest Market Price Paid for Hides and Tallow.

For Weak Kidneys Inflammation of the bladurinary troubles end DeWitt’s Kidney and Bladder Pills A Week’s Trial For 25c aO.PSWITTAOCL.Cfc——»m.

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