Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 40, Number 13, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 October 1907 — A DOZEN BEANERS. [ARTICLE]

A DOZEN BEANERS.

A windy day exhibits the real shape of the youth with the broad seated trousers. It might be a good idea and aid the morals of the city if one or two females were ordered to leave town.. At least one character has remained her% far beyond the period of toleration, and it has been wondered for a long time who would eventually get stung*. Traffic to t'.'.e never-close-up boozeries of the river section is apt to fall off if the Newton county grand jury is able to procure ■the™ names of Rensselaer Sunday visitors there. Newton county is doing a good turn to"KensseTaer by helping to clean up the river border of its own county. 1 purrrpKiii pie SCaSOft, 1116 only trouble with pumpkin pie is that ypu get it on your ears so badly when you eat it. Young fellows who call on, their girls these nights should have some consideration for the fellow who hustles the fuel. Widowers are said to be in the lead in the number of persons who have committed suicided. It is probable they are afraid that in a moment of weakness they might get married again. Women find lots of trouble in selecting a new hat, and their husbands find a lot of tronble in paying for them. When the Lord has provided a doctor and anti-toxin, He has done a large part of His duty in a diphtheria case, and there is no record of His ever having worked any miracles with any of the various faith fanatics in recent years. This is the time of year when a great many people are wondering how they can buy the winter’s fuel without touching the summer bank account. ’ A man at Aurora, 111, for the I sake of science proposes to live 6o i diays on peanuts. He will be envied by lots of small boys. It is generally safe to say “light refreshments” when the reporter is writing up a church social. The fellow that don’t buy the cowfeed can see no necessity in raising .the ptice of milk.