Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 39, Number 26, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 November 1906 — A Thanksgiving Fable. [ARTICLE]

A Thanksgiving Fable.

A gay young Gobbler, seeing- how Melancholy the Turkeys were, propounded A Conundrum. hy are Turkeys the Drum Corps of the Fowl Creation? Give it up? Because they all carry Drumsticks. O-u-c-h!” He dodged A blow from the Patriarch of the I’lock who Overheard him. < 1 "Spare Me,” said the young Fellow, assuming the Defensive. "I can give, you A Better one. Why do Turkeys have No Hereafter?” The Patriarch blustered Around and dragged his Wings, looking wary-Fieree.-He knew he-ought to know, but couldn't for the Life of Him remember. So he Glowered at the Culprit and asked Severely : “Well, Sir, why do Turkeys have No Hereafter?”) "Because they have their Necks Twirled in This.” "Pooh!” said the Patriarch Contemptuously. “That was around on Crutches when Adam wore Kilts. Now, here is Something new that I Caught on the Wing. We are All ta> be Dry Picked this Year.” “What!” Shrieked A giddy Blond with

a pink Crest. "Not on Your life!” “No, Silly, but as Soon as it is Over. It is the old Way of Turkey Undertaking and The only Way. In Philadelphia, where I Chipped into the World, Dry Picking was the Correct Thing. All the old families held to It. That gives Turkey Feathers the chance of their Lives. Turkey Tails for Fans—l am told the Aborigines quite Dote on Them.”—Chicago Record-Herald.