Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 38, Number 34, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 January 1906 — The Comic Side of The News [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

The Comic Side of The News

Congress will have to run those railway rate bills on the block system. Before we get any ditch dug in Panama we may have to send down thi Digger Indians. To ask Senator Burton when his terra expires would embarrass a more modest statesman. The New York State insurance machine was not equipped with a graftdetector. If Congress does half of Whfit is e> pected of it this winter, the grafters wil come to grief. Explorer Amundsen seems to believe it will require the services of a diver tc find the North Magnetic Pole. The President of Venezuela can’t make up bis mind which he is going tc fight first, Italy or France. Some of ‘those New York insurancs policies were more like the game of pol icy than the business of insurance. , With the American hen laying 20,•„ 000,000,000 eggs a year, ths cliiekeD family has something to crow over. What with n large salary and commissions on his own risks, the insurance man can play life against death- in any combination and still come out a winner. The Postmaster General seems to think the free mailing of speeches made in Congress to constituencies U not only an infliction upon the recipient, but kuocks all the profit out of the postal business. Since one of the fraternity has woz the hand of the President's daughter, the bald-headed men may take heart. Perhaps on his next ’’walk-softfy" expedition the President will use Monelik’s elephant tusks in place of the “big stick.” Since the Russo-Japanese war ended, Chins feels it her duty to rsise enough disturbance to keep np interest in the Orient. ( £* With all the talk of reforming the big Now York insurance corporations, there Is no proposal to Increase the policy holders' dividend*.