Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 38, Number 26, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 8 December 1905 — Staggers a London Waiter. [ARTICLE]

Staggers a London Waiter.

He was a sad-faeed American tourist and as he seated himself in a London restaurant he was immediately attended by an obsequious waiter. “I want two eggs,” said the American, “one fried on one side hud one on the other.” “ ’Ow is that, sir?” asked the astounded waiter. “Two eggs—une fried on one side and one on the other.” “Very well, sir.” The waiter was gone several minutes, and when he returned his face was a study. “Would you please repeat your horder, sir?” “I said, very distinctly, iwo eggs—one fried on one side and one on the other.” This time he was gone longer and when he returned he said anxiously: “Would it be awsking too much, sir, to ’ave you repeat your border, sir? I cawn’t think I ’ave it right, sir, y’ know.” “Two eggs,” said the American, sadly and patiently, “one fried on one side and one on the other.” More oppressive silence and another and fainter, “Very well, sir.” This time he Was gone' longer. When he returned his collar was unbuttoned, his hair disheveled and his face scratched and bleeding. Leaning over the waiting patron .be whispered beseechingly: “Would you mind tyking boiled heggs, sir? I’ve ’ad some words with the cook.” —Baliimore American.