Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 38, Number 18, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 24 October 1905 — Old Time News [ARTICLE]

Old Time News

Facts from Jaspsr County’s First Paper. March 9th 1894

The thanks of the editor were published to Congressman Dan I Mace for public documents, and to Senator J. I). Bright for a report l of the committee on finance. Pubj lishing thanks to congressmen for practically worthless public documents that cost them nothing is a custom as old as it is silly—and that is saying an awfnl lot. “Our enterprising fellow citizen, Wm. Rook,” had, at considerable J expense secured some of the cele* brated Shanghai fowls, and had eggs to sell. Do you all remember those long legged ungainly brutes of chickens! The Commissioners had adopted the plans of George Brown for the new court honse. 11 was to be an ornament to the town and a credit to themselves. It survived its ornamentalueas, for a surety. Notice of a township election for Marion township, hi the “Borongh. of Rensselaer,” for the “Ist Monday in Aprile next” is given. The notice is given by John D. Work, president of the board of trustees, and for whom, no doubt, Work street was named. A similar notice is given for Newton township. A. M. C. Gowdy, Oom Jack’s father, was president of the board of trustees, and Win. Halstead clerk. S. T. of Rensselaer had another very religious original poem. It is the first since “some unprincipled scamp” stole a “piece of original poetry” from the sanctum nearly two months before. The world would not have lost much if this piece had been stolen also.

Sam Davis still advertises that he will pay no debts of his wife’s contracting. Old residents who remember him say Sam wouldn’t pay debts of his own contracting either. Several heavy transactions in real estate were said to have taken place, and lands were eagerly sought after. Here are two jokes that still bob up occasionally. A witness was asked by a browbeatinglawyer just how far he was away when the assault happened. “Just four feet, 5£ inches.” “How came you so exact fellow!” “Because I expected some fool or other would ask me, so I measured it.” In the other a very modest young lady says to the shop keeper, “Have you any limb horn bonnets!” “Any what!” “Any limb-horn bonnets!” “Any-dou't you mean leg horn?” The young lady w’as brought to by proper restoratives' The Commissioners were in session and transacting important business bus tin* editor forgot to tell w hat that business was.