Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 35, Number 142, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 18 December 1903 — The District School of Spotless Town. [ARTICLE]

The District School of Spotless Town.

♦ When the fall season opened, tU* principal of the District School divided the year’s work hito eleven classes, and asked that the head of each department should put Into verse the first lesson of the year. The result was very interesting, and we are glad to it for the amusement and instruction of pur many readers. CLASS i. f* . « the alphabet. AN BIT bead or NA J • Cnu learn the Alphabet to say. Bet U C It takes the clever II Of «ne who Is a little YYY Jo C that when recited true lue Alphabet’s dirty through and through^ Vnt take this Q. the Alphabet AVvpry thorough cleaning will get If U will L’UL’U 8« polio, * or it finds dirt an EX foe. The Prrjof. sbc U efgb I jklninopq It s T nvwx X S CLASS 11. „„„ SPELLING. I ROPER enough, no doubt, ’twould be . f you spelled ’‘cleanliness" with C; But a belter way to spell It I know,— Just S—A—P—O— L—l—O. that famed soap doth work a spell Ami leads to Cleanliness so well that all pronounce the two the same— Identical meaning though different name, CLASS 111. ' RE ADI NO. THL short word READING. If twisted, ’tl* said. Will provf- we GAIN by all we’ve RED; y»-Ln.t READING is such a valued thing I }t-S iwerits In no EAR I’ll DING. l j«r ho on learning's road must la? «ho fails to RIDE that gentle NAG. Ill*Just point out one handy rule: — lon’ll always find there IS A POOL Wherever there’s SAPOLIO. ~—Adid so for iiepd not gol Each combination has the same letters as the word READING. ‘IS A POOL’’ has the saifie letters as SAPOLIO.

CLASS IV. PUNCTUATION. wREN you have put coal on (:) the fire. Perhaps you, too, flame up with Ire, And with an exclamation mark (!) Lour hands are now a shade too dark. Rut then may come a (,) happy thought Of wonders which that soap has wrought,Whose widespread use through a period (.) long, Beyond all question marks(????) It strong.; bo you ditto (") the course you always ga And make a dash (—) for SAPOLIO, CLASS V. ..... ARITHMETIC. T ' your Pleasure each day SUBTRACT all dirt that comes your way! But to do this, yon ought to know, You first must ADD Sapolio, Which will DIVIDEjig >1 your moll Aud require but a FRACTION of former toll; For “the Rule of Three,” as may he seen. Is DIRT plus SAPOLIO equals CLEAN! CLASS VI. 7“ —GEOGRAPHY— l —l_ IN life, whatever is your SPHERE, 'Tls safe to STATE dirt will appear; And this must quite annoying he, For dirt Is no delight to SEA. But though It be piled MOUNTAIN high. 'Tls PLAIN that It will quickly fly, If you’ve a notion (AN OCF.AN) to OBET Aud follow what the wisest any; Aud all of them SnyPOLKo, For that makes ev’rythlng snow. CLASS VII. * HISTORY. WHEN crusty old DIOGENES went on a daytime chase. With lighted lantern held before his philosophic face. He did not seek an honest man as histo-1 rles declare, But searched for a dishonest man, aud sought him everywhere. For a dishonest grocer had palmed off on 1 him some soap That failed to clean his lantern and at night had made him grope. So now he sought that rascal man ’round Athens, high and low, To muke the man refund the coin or giro SAPOLIO!

CLASS VIII. PHYSIOLOGY* DO not give EAR to counsel bad. For ev’ryone NOSE that make* one sad. The worst advice that TONGUE can tell Is, "Take this soap, 'twill do as well.” Just put your FOOT down Arm and strong And tell the clerk his BRAIN Is wrong. And you’ve experience quite In point To put his statement OUT OF JOINT. Just NAIL his lies and let him know Your HEART la set on SAPOLIO! CLASS IX. 1 MUSIC. « IT ts a matter of general NOTE That Into house or FLAT will float Dust and dirt to take their place In a fashion that’s Impolite and BASS For never mind how SHARP you are Their sir Invasion von caqpet BAR Unless the proper KEY you know, - Which is, of course, SAPOLIO— The soap that brings yon REST right' soon, And keeps your house or FLAT la TUNEI CLASS X. ALGEBRA. LET Housewife equal X plus E X-|-B> Let E the sign for Sapollo be; B< For Dirt let minus X be had; —X Then all these symbols we will add. The X and minus X drop out (As anyone can see, no doubt) And leave what must the housewife please— The happy symbol we call ease. EB| CLASS XI. " , ‘ . » SHORTHAND. TIIE cleverest hands, both short and logg. Are far too clever to purchase wrbng; So they buy the soap with the llt¥fe.sbort hand— ~ * A soap that dirt cannot withstand. For the soap with stenographic speed Is Ibc sort of cleaucr that people need To handily handle In handsome hand*. Hand Sapollo only meets tlut demands.