Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 35, Number 39, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 20 January 1903 — Crump’s Fame Is Secure. [ARTICLE]

Crump’s Fame Is Secure.

At last the much vaunted wisdom of re-electing Crumpacker to congress term after term has been vindicated. Gloriously vindicated! It has been long in coming. So long that we had wholly forgotten to watch for it. And it came not through any important laws passed through his efforts, nor through any plodding but useful work in committee rooms, nor through any able and effective oratorical efforts on the floor of congress. Nor yet in any great public improvements secured for his district. Neither has the boasted “independence” he says Tom Reed pumped into him, accomplished any good for the country; to justify his repeated nomination by the people of his district, in snap conventions assembled. But the vindication has come all right and fcr a cause more glorioqs than any of these. Fame has come to him suddenly, between two bats of a bunged eye, as it were, and placed its immortal laurel wreath upnn bis classic brow. Mrs.tßoosevelt, “the fihrst lady of the lahnd” has invited Crump to an afternoon tea. “Shades of the mighty” Can it bt! Our Crump has been To a White House Tea? And how was the news of this great and glorious event to be adequately spread abroad by Crump’s patient plodding asses of all work, the postmaster editors of the 10th Indiana district ? It was a difficult problem, but Crump solved it as readily as he always qffers to solve, but dont, all other great questions, such as the Hawaiian question, the Porto Rico question, the “nigger” question, the Roberts question, or the lynching question.

The ever reliable Washington correspondent of the Indianapolis Sentinel was sent for again. Be has a contract to interview Crump at least once a week anyhow, and tvic?, if he (the correspondent of cjurse)is sober enough, at so much per and the beer thrown in. The correspondent came and found Crump pacing up and down the room the very picture of despair. “Oh my noble patron what is the milter? Have the cares of state proven too heavy a burden for even your mighty mind, or have those base catiffs of the agricultural department cruelly cut off yr.ur supply of garden seeds? “Worse than that, much worse, my faithful, seedy slave. Listen! Mrs. Roosevelt has invited Me, I, Crumpacker the Great, to an afternoon tea, for this very day, and I know not, for my life I know not, what color of neck-tie I ought to wear. Ooooh!” And then he groaned and beat his breast. “But why not ak Mrs. Crumpacker ?” said the slave. “I had thought of that, but she is cotin Washington.” “Then ask her by telegraph.” “Can’t do that either, because she is on the way here, and I don’t know where to reach her by telegraph.”

The correspondent gave it up and went after beer and a writing pad. Crump continued bis despairing walk until it was time to go to the tea, then opened his trunk, took out-the first neck-tie be get sight of, wore it to the tea, and behold 1 Mrs. Roosevelt never gave the least sign but what she thought Crump’s tie was just the most utterly ut she ever saw in her life. Didn’t appear to notice it at all in fact. And wouldn’t if be had worn an old blue and brindle wool sock Around his neck. The above neck-tie story, incredible as it may seCm, is no pipedream of this paper. It came back from Washington last week, just

as we have given it„in all essential particulars, and was duly republished by the post-master editors psesent and promised of this district. rtf-