Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 22, Number 91, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 2 August 1901 — Phtholognyrrh” Spells “Turner.” [ARTICLE]

Phtholognyrrh” Spells “Turner.”

He walked up to the hotel register and signed his name with a flourish, “E. K. Phtholognyrrh.” “Look here. Turner,” exclaimed the clerk, who knew him well, “are they hunting for you or what? Where do you get that outlandish name?” “Get back, my boy, get hack! You’re slow,” replied Turner, airily, as he lit a cigar; “that’s my same old name written In plain English and pronounced as usual Just ‘Turner.’ Look at it Of course I do it just to get them all guessing. They wonder what nation I am from; what my name Is. I can now hear people talk about me all round. It is, as 1 said before, English spelling. ‘Phth,’ there Is the sound of T in ‘phthisis’; ‘olo,’ there is the ‘ur’ In‘Colonel;’ ‘gn,’ there Is the ‘n’ in ‘gnat;’ ■yrrh’ Is the sound of ‘er’ In ‘myrrh.’ Now, If that doesn’t spell ‘Turner’ what does it spell ?”