Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 22, Number 76, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 11 June 1901 — The Comic Side of The news [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

The Comic Side of The news

Tillman’s pitchfork has a busy summer before it. General Dicker now has charge of that Chinese indemnity matter. The dry goods box constitutional lawyers can now tackle some new problem. Money and husbands are two things the Princess Chimay does not seem to know the value of. King Edward is the latest monarch to find that he cannot command the winds and the waves. Every day or so the Boers kindly go out and shoot an obscure British officer up into the peerage. Many of the delegates to the mothers’ congress, it appears, could prove an alibi if they were hard pressed. West Point students appear to think they are being shamefully treated if they are not allowed to run the place. Reports from Albany show that the most dangerous part one enn take during a riot is that of an innocent spectator. Wherever you See the flag planted, therefore, it is safe to conclude that the constitution is following not far behind. Poets, according to Prof. Starr, are degenerates. The poets should now be heard as to what the college professors are. Ragtime music may be all wrong, but do the musicians think the Spanish war could have been won without the aid of the tune concerning the hot time that was to come off in the old town that same evening? Susan B. Anthony says the woman suffrage movement is growing. She sees quite a difference since the time the organization consisted of herself and Lucy Stone. The political pull of the man who waited thirty-nine years to have the government allow a claim of must have been too small to be located with a microscope. The selling by the sheriff of an old bicycle plant in Indiana calls to mind the 1 fact that the bicycle was a machine in ' quite general use before the automobile 1 was invented.