Rensselaer Semi-Weekly Republican, Volume 20, Number 72, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 May 1899 — Perkins Nonplused. [ARTICLE]

Perkins Nonplused.

Alf Clark of Hopkinsville, Ky., was a local wag who, when Ell Perkins visited that town on one occasion, stood his sallies of alleged wit all afternoon long. He was to Introduce Ell that night to the audience to which he was to lecture. When the time arrived, it was found that but few were present, owing to a heavy dash of rain that came up Just before the hour set for the lecture. Clark took Ell by the arm and walked him gently to the footlights. Making a bow, he said: “Ladles and gentlemen, it is my pleasant privilege to Introduce to you to-night the lecturer of the evening, Mr. Ell Perkins. Judge Feland, this is Eli Perkins. Mrs. Colonel Smith, Mr. Perkins, Mr. Hunter Wood, this is my friend, Mr. Perkins. Colonel Campbell, allow me. This Is Mr. Perkins.” This he continued until he had made the lecturer personally acqalnted with each member of the audience. Eli talked two hours, but nothing he said was as funny as his introduction.