Richmond Palladium (Daily), Volume 44, Number 315, 18 October 1919 — Page 14

'AQK TWO

Till: RICHMOND PALLADIUM. SATUKDA V, OCTOBFIt IS. 1!H

Plays I Hunt-ths'Thimble "0 dour mo, these poos my t him te!" exclaimed Aunt Louisa, as he took another one from her ork basket and placed it on her inger. "Aud this one doesn't fit ! ) Zaza. I wish you would bring uissy her thimble!" No sooner were the words uterod than Zaza, the beautiful pauicl, sprang from her bucket -ied, where she had been hing. aptarently sound asleep, and began i game of hunt -tho-t nimble, "all by ter lonesome," as the kiddies say. . moment more, and she hat paw (1 the missing article from out the orner where it had rolled ami tking it in her mouth sin cross the room and laid it trotted in Aunt ouisa's lap. "Thank you. dear Zaza!" that rateful lady cried. "You always ere a help and comfort!" And aza, wagging her plumy tail, seeml to reply, "You're welcome!" Oneday a little kitten came to ve in the house with Zaza and ich good times as the two had, 'laying tag and hide-and-seek, till, pent and weary, they lay down lose together for a nap. Hut at ist the time came for the two riends to part, much to His' dog's orrow, and she appeared to miss ier little playmate very much, lometinies, to test her powers of nemory, he mistress. Miss Emily, vould say. "Go find kitty, Zaza!" aid then such a hunt would begin. ieneath tables, chairs, and sofas, nit all in vain. Then the disap ointed doggie would come back to ier mistress, and looking up in her ace with a worried expression, vould seem to say with her earnst brown eyes, "O missy, I fear on are trying to cheat me! Kitty ias gone!" Then Miss Emily, sorv for the dog's distress, would lay own her work to play with her, nd pet her, or perhaps try to comirt her with a bit of chocolate, and on all would be serene again, and a .a her usual happy self. OUR DUMIl ANIMALS. Iiild, Four, is Athletic Prodigy Charles White. Charles White is the little four-ear-old boy who has been altractig nation-wide attention because t his unusual strength and Ilerulean build. He juggles weights, oxes and does acrobatic stunts onsidered marvelous. One of hid .-eight-lifting feats is raising an LSound bar above his head. He eighs only 50 pounds himself. He as won the prize at the annual yracuse, N. Y., baby show each oar and has been offered a good alary by a Pennsylvania vaudeville uanager.

Zaza

I'M J! X "b

u mvi" r? nam

When Ralpho ami the tourist-, j finally reached the airplane tliey shook hands with Captain l!rae i and thanked lino lor rcM'tiing them. They were surpi'i.-ed to liml j that the airplane tarried other pasI senders besides the captain and Lamar. Lamar introduced them to ; Ladydcar and th1 children and then Captain Hravc made prepa- . rations lor going home. It wasn't so hard work to rise Mom the mountain side as it had been to land. The captain and the oilier men pushed the plane over to the edge of the little level space anil everyone climbed into the plane. There was plenty of room for all. for the plane was a great big, roomy one, you know. When all was ready, Captain llrave started the motor. The plane slipped over the edge of the icy platform and started to bump down the slope. The ALL NEW THIS DANCES MAY ONE MAKES BE QUEER; 'EM DIZZY! The Dizzy Sector of the Ladies' Art and Embroidery club gave their semi-annual dance at the Me doolian hall, and all the old timers were present as usul. The biggest hit of the evening was the fall Al. Biskew experienced. Since so many of the folks present refuse to talk about Al.'s fall, and it has put the village into an uproar to get the gossip of this event, after this week's Iireozo makes its appearance, the people of our village w ill be surprised to know. Ez Ebbs, I who plaved the fiddle for this I dance was a special reporter for The Breeze. This had been the first dance Al. P.riskew had attended since the new dances came into light, and if seemed as Al. was a little awkward to keep out of the way of the more experienced dancers. About the time Al. thought he was getting .so he could dance fairly well, a lady, weighing nearly two hundred and fifty became over-balanced and fell on Al. The lady became very much peeved at Al. and said: ' I don't know what in the world to call you." Al. looked up very weakly and replied: "Well, lady, about the best thing you can call me is an ambulance." JAM ALLOWANCE CUT DOWN AT OUR VILLAGE FOOD SHOW A resolution was passed by the jam committee of the county food tdiow to allow only lour ounces of jam for the baby. This will be a lather short allowance for some people, as it was heard that some women are objecting because they usually wash one ounce off the baby's face every time, after eating jam. CHEWING GUM MACHINES OFFER SAME OLD PRICES The only thing in our village that has not doubled in price are the chewing gum vending machines for you can still get one stick of chewing gum for a cent. FEW DONT'S FOR THE BABY Don't put the baby to sleep in the oven. Don't try to stop the baby from crying by stuffing old rags in its mouth. iKm't pick the baby up by ears or the ankles. the Don't let the baby stay out later than ten o'clock, regardless of what excuse it may give. Don't let the baby play over two innings of base ball-he may start to crying and get put out. Don't forget to give the baby two weeks' vacation with full pay.

Iielol'e tile hile "round ui in rimiii eei ii o a ve i .1 .... .. ii .. i . i . . . and start through the air. The tourists never had ridden in an airplane betore and m 1 1 1 uere very in in-Ii interested in the plane and the view of the beautiful Alp Irom the skies. Captain llrave noticed this and so, lor an! hour or more, they flew slowly over' the mountain tops or dropped down' low over thi' little valleys. Thej children enjoyed the sight -seeing, trip, too. lor Lamar ami Kalphoi pointed out the famous peaks and1 spots where accidents had hup ; petied to (limbing parlies and! thrilling re-cues had been made. J ' J 1 ii t you lit tli- folks have seen the most thrilling rescue ot nll,"j said Lamar. "Thar was the lirst; time that an airplane ever has been used to save mountain climbers! Irom death. If Captain llrave j

Hill ii didn't vii

IK MWEWlm WW

Official Wind-Jammer of (lie Community

THE VILLAGE GOSSIP 15 YOUKKOP SPOTINSKI GOES TO BARBERS' CONVENTION Youkop Spotinski. For the lirst lime in the history of harboring in our village have we been able to send a delegate to the barber.-' convention to be held this year at Moscow, Russia. Youkop Spotinski will leave here on the S. S. Itolsheviki up the Whil'feiu river to New York. Ez arrow says if any of those P.ol sheviki fellows und 'island what this harboring is. it will be a long time before the village has a barher again, because some of them have, enough whiskers to stuff an ordinary mattress. Mrs. Spotinski will run the barbershop in conjunction w ith her laundry. NEW ROAD PUTS UP BIG ARGUMENT HERE The new gravel road will be made Irom fX per cent, mud and f. per cent, gravel, to cut down expenses of the town, and it will also be cut down to the lied alter each rain. LILY HOLDS HIS CIGAR; CONSTABLE RAISES ROW Miss Lily Tulip went to I ho village dance and as she did not have one dance a very good friend asked i her to hold his cigar while he danced with a chum of hers. Lilywas standing there, when all of a sudden, the village constable came up and said, miss, i guess you will have to gel rid of that cigar, as we do not allow- ladies to smoke in here any more." OUR DENTIST, THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS NO PAIN wur village dentist has a sign up in his office advertising painless dental work -and we have begun to think he is the one who don't feel the paia.

hadn't picked us up the chances are that we would have either I cozen or starved to death before ;inj other help came." Captain I!ravc made light of the rescue, though. "That was juM a ark," he said, laughingly.

j "I'robably it was to someone who has been through the world war," I u.'lied Kalpho. ' During '-l' ride about the mountains the toiin.-:1 told Captain llrave who they were and where i they came from. Captain I!rave, Ladydcar and the children werej 'rather disappointed when they! learned that none ot the men were: from America. j Though all of the tourists seemed like very nice folks the man who appealed to .lack and Jane most, was Caspar Angelo. an Italian.: From the other tourists the chil dreti learned that he was a mil j lionaire automobile manii! act urer in Italy. Jack, at least, had heard i of the famous car which the man had designed and was making. For Jack had seen pictures when it won the great auto oi it races my Y CHARLES MAC LEON II POEM ETTES liovo is sweet Yet very hitler Especially when. You don't gel i r. Movies are fine When total dark -'Cause there's too many Cops in the park. Her cheeks are Painted so bright -- They belong to her, So it's all right. NOT CLEAN SHAVEN: PLAYS RIP VAN WINKLE One of the in the "Youn play the part hero at our members of the cast l; Hero," who was to of a clean shaven village tonight, has changed the show bill. Corntossel forgot to get and can not play tlx Hero." Kip Van Winkle played in.-itoad. is Hiram a saav e. "Young will he SAMBO COULD GET STARTED HOME IN ONE MINUTE ( Sambo Jackson was over in : France, and someone asked him just what he would do if he was t told to catch a boat for home in 'ten minutes. "Say, Ross." replied Sambo, "what is worrying me. : what will I do with the other n in ' minutes." BALD-HEADED MEN HAVE SOME DISADVANTAGES Ez Zarrow quoted the old ing "absence makes the heart grow fonder," but he said one thing about a bald headed man. It gives him more territory when he washes his face. A FLIVVER STOOD UNDER THE OLD APPLE TREE.. Ez Zarrow's oldest boy bought a flivver last week at the Old Mill Garage, and he went over to Bean Ridge to call on a girl friend. He parked his machine under an old apple tree, and about midnight, the girl's father put him out, and he decided it would be wise to go home. After fifteen minutea of hard labor trying to crank his machine he decided to light a match and roc what the trouble might bo. To the boy's surprise he found he had been turning the handle of the old grindstone which wis under the same tree.

say-1

! hack home. And Jack had w ished i hundreds of limes for a ride in the ! car which had made over inn miles I an hour, the papers said. I Had Jack or Jane dreamed that ! i hey would see Signor Angi l again and under thrilling circumstances: they would have been even more interested in him. Hut you'll jhear about that some time later. I When Captain llrave brought the 'plane to a landing in the villagu ,:,"ain another one ol the tourists, Sir I Jonah! Sprigg. an Englishman, i said: ! "I'd consider it an honor ii all of !.vou. including 'Lady Dear' (ho i said it as though Ladydcar was a j titled person) and Jack ami .lane would ctime to my chab t tomorrow and let tne entertain you." i of course everyone aureed r COMIC. Copyright.

nvbodv kin my I lung done t if he wants it hard enough j hie is most folks hain't got Trou a sulh cient capacity tor want in'" 1 it an. n AUD T Bean Ridge Echo Prints Strange Blunder Yesterday The P.ean Ridge Echo printed an item about the big lawn party al Mrs. Ebbs and intended to use the French word 'fete' as it is considered a high-toned word for an occasion of that. kind. The Echo had the heading of the article to read: "Mrs. Ebhs' Nig Feel." Mrs Ebbs called at the Echo oflice and made it plain, her feet were not any larger than the reporter's mouth who wrote about her parly. DOC GRIMM IN BAD AGAIN, AS USUAL Doc (irimin diagnosed the case of Squire Weatherby and said he was eating too much. Squire has begun to look for another doctor. Ho is absolutely positive such is not the case; and it he has been eating too niucli, it will bo the first person who has ever had loo much to eat at the Grigg's hasliery. ECONOMICAL HINTS A groat saving can bo made in preparing bread pudding by leaving out the bread. Doughnuts can be made al! hole. You if the them. will eat less scrambled eggs shells are scrambled with WE ANSWER ALL QUESTIONS Mrs. Ebbs: What is the life of a flea? 15. K.:The life of a flea is a very hard one, unless it is an educated flea, and then it is not safe from going to the dogs. SMART IS RIGHT Tramp "Say, kid, where does yer father keep his money?" Waco "In his vest." Tramp "Whore's the vest?" Waco "In the kitchen" A few minutes later the tramp emerged from the kitchen, decorated with two discolored eyes. "Smart boy, him," he commented. "He didn't tell me that his father was in the vest."