Richmond Palladium (Daily), Volume 43, Number 262, 14 September 1918 — Page 12

PACK TWO

RICHMOND PALLADIUM. SEPTEMBER 14. 11S CRAP FROM SAMMY STAY-AT-HOME'S OLD KIT BAG

WAS IT WORTH IT? Jam-tarts unlimited was little Bobby's Idea of Heaven, but since war-flour came and the fat was scarce, be hadn't ben Quite so fond of them as before. ; Mother, coming into the kitchen one afternoon, saw Bobby gazing at a dish of newly baked tarts. , "What are you doing, Bobby," she asked sharply. ; "I was Just wondering, mother." "Wondering? You haven't touched those tarts, I hope?" "Not yet, mother." said Bobby. "I was just wondering if they were good enough to be whipped for." London Answers.

. EXPECTING TOO MUCH. "I hope you will learn more this year than you did last," remarked the teacher. "That will be hard," said Francis, ! 'cause last year had one more day than this." Exchange. LITTER-ATURE. Scout: "I have an uncle who Is making big money from his pen." Patrol Leader: "That 60? There are not many writers that can make a decent living from their pen. . Scout: "But he Isn't a writer; he raises pigs. Boys' Life. CAN YOU BEAT IT? Lady (to carpet man): "Be sure to beat this one well. It has never been up since It was down. Boys' Life. WATCH YOUR STEP. Pat (to Mike on the roof): "Don't come down the ladder at the northeast corner; I took it away." UP IN THE AIR. Bob White: "Mr. Jim Meadow.lark seems peevish today." Mrs. B. White: "Yes. the least noise makes him soar." Boys' Life. Boarding School Days Sixty Years Ago Sixty years ago there were two sisters who went to boarding school It all was so different then from now. The girls wore queer, old-fashioned dresses with tight little waist3 and. long full skirts, and Instead of having taxi cabs to take then! from the station to the school, a lazy old horse plodded along, drawing the queer oldfashioned hack or coupe. The girls were taught to be very quiet and lady-like, and were not to be seen publicly with boys or young men, except on very special occasions. There were many other differences, and in reading the present Junior newspaper, one of the sisters who lives in Richmond, has been reminded so often of her own school days that she has written to tell about them. One of the delights of my school life in the Seminary where my sister and I spent two years, was the Wednesday afternoon half-holiday, which was ours during the spring and early summer, when with our teachers we climbed the adjacent hills, and gathered wild flowers which grew in great profusion and variety. These excursions were no doubt begun in the interest of the class in botany, but were enjoyed by all the school The flowers were taken home, analyzed to ascertain genera and species, some of the first specimens pressed and carefully preserved in herbariums, with class, order, botanical and common collections were quite beautiful, and were the pride of the class, showing skill and pains-taking in their preparation. The family in the Seminary consisted of the Rev. Mr. S and wife, the united head of the institution, a corps of six teachers, and thirty pupils. In the school room this number was more than doubled by the attendance of pupils residing in town. In this pleasant home, days and weeks passed rapidly; school life was enjoyed to its full extent; lasting friendships were formed; and the demands of fashion and society did not intrude Into our peaceful Somaine. Contrasting the past and present

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Italian soldiers lined up before the door of an improvised canteen of the American Red Cross wear a look of appreciation which Red Cross workers In Italy meet wherever they go. Hot coffee Is being given these men in the lulls of an offensive to fortify them against the long periods that may come when they cannot get food or comfort of any kind. Three flags are crossed above the canteen door, the Italian, the American and the Red Cross.

SURE. "Bobby," said the minister to a little fellow aged six, "I hear you are going to school now." "Yes, sir," was the reply. "What part of it do you like best?" "Comin home," was the prompt answer. Boys' Life. Don't forget September 25, 26 and 27, and note the vast improvements in text-books, methods of teaching and all things connected with schools, I none the less admire the wisdom of the teachers In their efforts to lay deep and secure the foundation upon which education must rest. Every morning, as a recreation from the pursuit of verbs and equations, we had a short exercise in mental arithmetic, and each afternoon before we joined in our closing song, a tap of the bell called us to the floor, and we formed into a class to drill and define words chosen from Webster's dictionary. When conditions favored, lessons in astronomy were often supplemented by a study of the Heavens, and a call to leave our books and go out of doors was always welcome, whether a night in June or in frosty mid-winter. Here we were taught to name and place stars of first magnitude, notable ones of lesser size, trace prominent groups and constellations, and thus was begun an interest in those mysterious worlds so far away. The years pass and age comes on apace, but the friendly stars look down on us just as in those youthful days, and Orion, resplendent in sword and belt and glittering epaulettes, nightly strides across the winter sky, undimmed and undisturbed by lapsing centuries. Mrs. Geneva Good. SOCIETY NEWS Master James Hill, Jr., Rpent a few days in Rushville last week. Miss Emily Roberts will return from Boston, Mass., the latter part of next week. Miss Virginia Long, of Cincinnati, Ohio, was the guest of her cousin. Miss Julia R. Burr, of North Ninth stret. Buy now! Buy liberally! Buy cheerfully! The boys are giving their Lives. Will you lend your Savings?

SOUNDS LIKE THAT. Headmaster of a private school: "You will make no mistake ta placing your toy in our care, Mr. Winfall. This school is often referred to as "The American Rugby." Mr. Winfall: "H'm! I don't mind a little football, but I don't think that any school should make a specialty of it." Buffalo Express.

USES OF TIN CANS. By Lone Scout Alf red P. Groos, Groos, Mich. As tin is now very scarce and as the price is very high, boys who are a least bit handy can make use of a good supply of old tin cans found about the yard. Their uses are a3 follows: Large four-quart cans will make good martin houses if a hole is cut near the top for an entrance and several in a cluster mounted on a tree or a tall pole. Smaller cans may be used for wren houses to be put on fence posts near bushes or other places of shelter from the elev of enemy birds. What boy doesn't use a tin can for worms or bugs when he goes out a fishin'? Or tie two or three on a dog's tail in order to get rid of him. If you possess a pair of tin cutters you can make small dishes for feeding and watering rabbits, pigeons and other small pets. They can also be used for bicycle repair containers. A strip of tin will also- make a good joint for a tent pole. In this way you can unjoint your tent poles like a casting rod and it will be much easier to carry. Small scraps of tin may be used for patching mouse and rat holes. Two cans will make a good double boiler to soften glue, wax, etc. Cans with tight-fitting covers can be used for storing bicycle cement and other liquids. A can may be used for baking potatoes or popping corn while in camp. A can punched full of holes will make a good bait can for live bait such as mice and birds, which are used by trappers. Tin of the sides of cans may be put around bird house entrances for protection against cats. A foot stool can be made of tomato cans by tying them together and covering the top and sides with cloth. A good dark room light may be made of a can with alight inside and a movable red cloth over the top end. A very good life preserver can be made of two four-quart pails with tight covers by (Hitting one in each end of a flour sack and sewing them there. Lone Scout Magazine.

TOUCHING TALES. An English lord who had just arrived from England was talking to an American Boy Scout. "My grandfather," ho said, "was a very great man. One day Queen Victoria touched his shoulder with a sword and made him a lord." "Aw, that's nothin'," said the Scout. "One day Red Wing, an Indian, touched my grandfather on the head with his tomahawk and made him an angel. Private Life.

AN EXPERT. A Government press censor was talking about the German pres3 censorship. "We found on some prisoners recently," he said "the German censorship latest prohibition Prominent among these was an order to the press not to mention the growing use in German of dog flesh for food." "That prohibition reminds me of a story a story that may contain a lot cf truth." "A German prisoner, the story goes, was rebuked by a sergeant for the sloppy way he was feeding and looking after some Red Cross dogs. " 'I guess you think you know a lot about dogs,' the sergeant sneered. " 'Yes, sir, that is right,' said the prisoner, 'for let me tell you, sir, I've been cook in a Berlin restau rant for the last two years.'" Washington Star. NO LONGER DOWN IN THE MOUTH. Jimmy wanted his tooth after it had been pulled out, so the dentist wrapped it in paper and gave it to him. "But what are you going to do with it, Jimmy" he asked. "I'm going to take it home, cram it full of sugar and watch it ache." Bolys' Life. WAR INVENTIONS. Homer's Iliad tells us how the Greeks, though beleaguering for ten years, were unable to take the city, nor could they force the Tro-i jans to surrender. Finally, so the legend goes, the Greeks constructed a huge wooden horse, which in its interrior concealed many Greek warriors. This horse was rolled triumphantly into Troy by the Trojans, but during the night the Greek men escaped from the horse and threw open the portals of the city. The Greek hosts having returned now swarmed into the city and sacked Troy. This was over two thousand years ago. Legends such as these, it seems, were just as popular then as they are now; at any rate the longing in the human breast for the spectacular during wartime seems hard to eradicate. It is only natural that war weary people should be fond of giving their imagination free reign and of hoping that some miracle a wonderful invention will suddenly appear which will end the war with oue stroke. Unfortunately, history, with hardly any exceptions, teaches us that but few wars were won by means of any one war invention. Wars in recent times from Napoleon down to this day were not won by means of any particular invention. Napoleon did not surrender on account of a war weapon that was known only to his conquerors. Nor were the American Civil War, the Franco-Prussian War, or the Russo-Japanese War won or lost by a new war machine. If this is true of all other great wars, how much truer is it of the present cataclysm. Unheard and undreamed of inventions, that would have staggered humanity twenty years ago, have been thrown into ttis inferno, and to what good? The bombing airplane, the submarine, wireless, trinitrotoluol, poison gas, the war tank, liquid fire, the 75-mile gun, are all first class war inventions, every one of which would have spelled victory to Napoleon, had he possessed the secret And wonderful as every one of these inventions is, none of them alone have been able to bring about a decision. Nor are they likely to do so. The Germans thought the sub marine would bring a decision. J their experts staking almost their

PUNCTUATION. A funny old man told this to me: "I fell in a snow drift in June," said he; "I went to a ball game out in the sea I saw a jelly fish float up In a tree I found some gum in a cup of tea I stirred the milk with a big brass key I opened my door on my bended knee I beg your pardon for this," said he. "But 'tis true when told as it ought to be, 'Tis a puzzle in punctuation you see," Boys' Life.

Sammy was confronted the other day by a man who thought that he was very bright, so he asked Sammy some Bible questions. One of them was: "What was Eve made for?" Sammy was not to be downed by the man so he answered: "For Adam's Express Company." David Henderson. IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED. Small boy (handing grocer two cents) : "I want two cents worth of bananas." Grocer (not wanting to bother with so small amount): "We have no bananas." Boy (pointing to a stalk of bananas): "What are those?" Grocer: "Pineapples." Boy: "Wei, give me two cents worth of pineapples." Boys' Life. While our sergeant was in camp a very exciting incident occurred. A man ran out of the camp and called, "Help, Help!" When asked what was the matter he said that as he was going to his room he saw the kitchen sink. David Henderson. last card upon it. It has proven a ghastly failure, otherwise how could a million American soldiers have landed in France, with hardly a loss worth speaking about? They tried Chlorin gas in a surprise action on the Canadians, putting sev eral thousand of them out of the fighting, but as a whole it had no effect upon the war.

Suppose we send ten thousand bombing airplanes over Germany. They alone will not win the war. Ten thousand or fifty thousand tanks alone will not win the war. A thousand land battleships or a v thousand other fearful land cruisers alone will not win the war. Raining death and destruction upon the civil population as a rule has only one result. It inflames the people to greater deeds, to greater sacrifices ,to grater hate, to greater determination to win the war. France, England and Italy are shining examples of this. No, any one invention Is not likely to win the war, some day, pei haps, some one will invent an Atomic Ray which is capable of pulverizing whole regiments at a stroke. Nothing of this sort is impossible. But it is not very probable. Rather it is the wholehearted devotion of the non-combatants to a great and just cause that will win the war. The nation that can throw into the scales the greatest amount of war implements, the heaviest weight of metal, the greatest amount of fighters, coupled with a prodigious use of all of the best war inventions will win in the end providing that every man and woman behind the lines constantly thinks and dreams of war and victory and is prepared to put every last ounce of strength as well as all worldly belongings into the righteous cause without stint or restraint. The greatest war invention is tha fiery undying will to win. IL GRENSBACK.

Sammy-Stay-Home's uncle it Is claimed In the weekly Soup-bone of Calebraska, has a wonderful clock. When the hands indicate that it is 5:30. he knows that it is 8:15 o'clock. David Henderson. A soft answer turneth away wrath.

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