Richmond Palladium (Daily), Volume 33, Number 133, 27 June 1908 — Page 5

TUB IlICmiOND PAL LADIU3I AND SUX-TELEGRA3I, SATURDAY, JUNE 27, 1908.

PAGE FIVK.

SOCIAL

To Reach the Socletr Editor. Call Mrs. Ray Shlveley entertained the members of the Wednesday Bridge Whist club yesterday afternoon, at her home, corner A and North Fourteenth street. The game was played at three fables, no prizes being awarded. At the conclusion of the game luncheon was served. 5 Mrs. W. A. SimpHon is the guest of Mrs. McDonald of Richmond, Virginia for several weeks. The dance given last evening by Mr. Emmett Bartel and Mr, Norman Craighead was a most delightful affair. Invitations had been issued to the members of the Tuesday Evening Dancing club and a large number of the club members were in attendance. Piano and drums furnished the music. About one hundred enjoyed dancing until a late hour. A partial list of the guests is: Misses Opal Husson, Mildred Gaar, Fannie Jones, Agnes Twlgg, Bertha Garver, Martha McClellan, Afton Clapp, Josephine Cates, Rose Gennett, Juliet Swayne. Messrs. Russell Gaar, Julian Cates, Walter Craighead, Dudley Cates, Robert Crane, Edwin Wilson, Erman Smith, Thomas Campbell, Howard Kamp, Ramsey Poundstone, Mr. and Mrs. Harry Simmons, Mr. and Mrs. Wib Crawford, Mr. and Mrs. Will Campbell, Mr. and Mrs. Harry Gennett, Mr. and Mrs. Wickham Corwin, Mr. and Mrs. George R. Williams, Mr. and Mrs. Ed Cates, Mr. and Mrs. George Cates, Mr. and Mrs. Charles Kolp, Mr. and Mrs. Ray Robinson, Mr. and Mrs. A. D. Gayle. 8 Mr. and Mrs. W. J. Robie and daughter Grace, 117 lorth Thirteenth street, will leave for Petoskey, where they will remain until October. Mr. Charles Huffman will be hostess for a meeting of the Happy Hour club Saturday evening, July eleventh. J8 J The year book for the Richmond, Indiana, chapter of the Daughters of the American Revolution, has just been issued. October eleventh, there will be a state conference, of the various Indiana chapters held in one of the large cities. A dinner party was given last evening at the Country club house by Mrs. Ella Van Heusen of North Fourteenth street. The guests were Mrs. Florence Lodwick, Miss Ada Woodard and Miss Comley, who is the guest of Mrs. Van Heusen. J . A number of the members of the First M. E. church formed a nlonie party at Glen Miller park last evening. ' 0 The annual picnic of the South Eighth street church will be held Tuesday, June thirtieth at Glen Miller park. t& Several dinner parties were given yesterday at the Robinson cafe. A number of out of town guests also took luncheon there. The following invitations were received today by members of the Elks: Dear Sir: Have a Look! Have a Look! THE TIME Friday, July 3. THE PLACE Jackson Park. THE GIRL. Your tvili, sister or eomeooay eise s Busier. THE WAY TO GO Two special cars will leave Traction Station at 7:30 p. m. THE ATTRACTION Dancing, with Heidelberg Orchestra; Refreshments and a display of Fireworks worth the while. Solos by Mrs. Hare of Indianapolis, Miss Bertha Garver, Mr. Frank Braffett and the Elks' Quartette. Fraternally yours, the Social Committee for 1908: F. S. Anderson, Carl Pierson, Harry Land, Clifford Price, Ed. Wilson. The Ladies Aid society of the South Eighth Street Friends' church held a picnic yesterday afternoon at Glen Miller park. All the members of the society with their families and a few friends attended the enjoyable affair. " Mrs. Shuman Jones, of Los Angeles, Cal., is receiving this afternoon at the Westcott hotel. The hours are from two until five-thirty. A party composed of the following will attend the Triumph lodge K. of P. picnic tomorrow. Misses Carolyn Greene. Blanche Schattel, Jessie Snyder, Nellie Tangeman, Messrs. Joseph Schattel, Warren Vance and John Schattel, Mr. and Mrs. John Meerhoff. ajC Mr. and Mrs. Elgar Hibberd entertained at dinner last evening at the Country club house. The guests were Miss Blair of Cincinnati. Mrs. Beardsley of New York. Mrs. S. S, Saxton of Chicago and Mrs. Paul Comstock. . v Dr. and Mrs. Chenoweth were of the week by a number of their friends. The affair was in honor of their first wedding anniversary. The hours were spent in a social manner. Refreshments were served. s BETTER THAN SP&UKMG. Spanking does not core children of bed wetting. There is a constitutional caus for this trouble. Mrs. M. Summers, Bo; , W, Notre Dame, Ind., will send free to anj mother her successful home treatment, wht full instructions. Send no money, but write her today if your children trouble ycu i& this way. Don't blame the child, the chances are it can't help it. This treatment also cures adults and aged people troublec with oriao difficulties by day or night.

NEWS

Home Phone 1121. or Bell Phone 21 El society of the First Presbyterian church was held yesterday afternoon at the church. A committee composed of Mrs. Thomas Graham. Mrs. John Coate. Mrs. D. L. Mather. Miss Sadie Sanderson and Miss Curtis had charge of the affair. The church was decorated in a very pretty manner with daisies and ferns. A musical program as follows was given: Piano boIo Miss Bessie Adams Violin solo Miss Cornelia Shaw Piano solo Miss Esther Coate Piano solo Miss Ruth Pennell Piano solo Miss Mary Clements The Junior Helpers, an organization composed of the young children of the church, with Mrs. Graham, as president gave a "cantata" which was In the nature of a missionary exercise. Several musical numbers were also given by the little people. After the program had been completed, a social time followed. This was one of the most attractive and charming sessions in the history of the society. Miss Marjorie Nichols and Miss Nellie Harris are visiting at Camden, O., for a few days. Get Your Money's Worth. A pretty good test of a soap's quality is the number of uses to which it can be put. A soap that will cleanse the daintiest textures, is often of no account for heavy work. Doubtless the soap that does the best under all circumstances is the pure quality called Easy Task soap. Flannels, overalls, butchers' aprons or lace-handkerchiefs are all washed perfectly by it. Only 5c a cake, too. THE STANDARD YARD. That In I'ae In Great Britain and the Inlted States. The yard Is the British and American standard of length. Down to 1824 the original standard of Britain, from which ours was copied, was a rod, which bad been deposited in the court of exchequer, Loudou, in the time of Queen Elizabeth. In those days all measures Intended for general use were taken to the court of exchequer to be examined by the proper officer. That official took the proposed measure and placed It parallel with the standard and If found correct placed certain marks of identification upon it. By an act of parliament In 1824 the old Elizabethan standard was superseded by another, which had been constructed under the directions of the Royal society sixty-four years previous. This act provided that "the straight line of distance between the centers of two points in the gold studs in the brass rod now In the custody of the clerk of the house of commons shall be the genuine standard of the yard measure in Great Britain." The act further provided that the measurements of the rod must be made when the temperature of the brass was at G2 degrees F. The standard was destroyed by fire In 1S34, and the commission appointed to replace it made the yard measure now in use. The new standard was deposited In the house of parliament in 1855, and authenticated copies of it are In the possession of our government officials at Washington. THE DEAD SEA. Work of the Salt Diver In Thia Desolate Waste. The awful desolation of the Dead sea, which lies nearly 1,300 feet below the level of the Mediterranean, is broken here and there by the salt divers, whose work is probably as ancient as the human race itself. From remotest antiquity the salt of the Dead sea has been collected and taken to the Jerusalem market, where It Is used for curing hides and for domestic purposes. Dead sea water contains over 25 per cent of solid substances, of which 7-per cent is chloride of sodium, or common salt. The Dead sea contains no living creature. Sea fish put into its waters speedily die. Not a single boat navigates its strange waters, nor is there any sign of life, save the isolated parties of salt divers, who scrape and slowly amass their glistening heaps of crystal near the mouth of the Jordan. When a sufficient cargo is made ready a long string of camels crosses the desert, and the salt is loaded up Into panniers, or "shwerries," and taken into Jerusalem, where it finds a ready market. Salt, as is well known, has been used as currency from time immemorial, Just as bricks of tea are used today in central Asia, especially in the borderland of China and Siberia. Technical World Magazine. ARTIFICIAL BALDNESS. Th Ancient and Stranate Caatora ( Shaving- the Head. A historical inquiry into the origin of the custom of shaving the head, which is practiced in Beveral countries, would be interesting. It was not until the fifth century that In Europe priests began to shave their crowns. The Roman clergy then adopted the circular method and shaved that small round spot on the top of the head which is known as the tonsure. In Scotland, however, the monks shaved the whole of the fore part of the head from ear to ear. In the Andaman islands every man shaves his head, or, rather, gets his wife to shave it for him. Many other orientals also get baldheaded. As for the Chinaman, his method of shaving is exactly opposed to that of the Roman monk. He shaves all but a round patch, the hair of which grows long and forms the pigtail. When the difficulty of shaving the head is borne In mind the true strangeness of the custom becomes doubly apparent. It Is hard to see the advantage of it, yet in one form or another and at one time or other it has been practiced In nearly every country.

Sunday Services

Grace M. E. Church W. M. Nelson, pastor. Sunday school at 9:00 a. m. Bishop Warne will be present and address the school. Preaching at 10:30 by the Bishop. At 6:30 the League devotional meeting will be conducted by the president, O. F. Ward In the absence of the assigned teacher, Mr. Lawrence Smelser, who is now in the Philippine Islands. The subject will be the Sixty-six Promises of the Bible. At 7:30 the pastor will preach on "The Lot of the Righteous." A most cordial Invitation is extended to friends and strangers in the city. Earlham Heights Public School Building. Robert H. Dunaway, minister. Sabbath School at 2, and preaching at 3. Tuesday evening Bible class at Mr. Lee Eadler's. Instruction in singing Wednesday evening at the school house. Neighborhood church. Everybody welcome. Second Presbyterian North Nineteenth street. Robert H Dunaway, pastor. Sabbath School it 9:15. Church Sermon at 10:30. Senior Endeavor at 6:30. Special Song Service at 7:15. Fifth Street M. E. Church J. Cook Graham, .pastor. Sabbath school at 9:15 a. m. Love feast service at 10:30 followed by sermon by pastor, and administration of Lord's Supper. Junior League at 2:30. Senior League at 6:30. Sermon at 7:30 by Rev. T. M. Guild, District Supt. Special music at each service. You are welcome. First Church of Christ (Scientists Second floor Masonic Temple. Sunday services 10:45 a. m., subject, "Christian Science." Wednesday evening experience meeting, 7:45. The public is cordially invited. Reading room No. 10 North Tenth street, open to the public, 9 a. m. to 5 p. m. St. Andrew's Catholic Fifth and South C streets. Mass at 7:30; High Mass at 9:45; Vespets- sermonette and benediction at 3 o'clock. Rev. Frank A. Roeil. rector. Rev. H. J. Gadlage, assistant. St. Mary's Catholic Masses every Sunday at 8 and 9 o'clock and High Mass and sermons at 10:30; Vespers and benediction every Sunday at 3 p. m. Rev. J. F. Mattingly, rector, Rev. Thomas A. Hoffman, assistant. First English Lutheran Church Cor. 11th and South A streets. E. G. Howard, pastor. Morning worship, 10:30 a. m. Evening service 7:30 p. m. The men of the church will attend in a body to hear a sermon by the pastor on "The Need and Opportunities of Churchmanship in Our Times." Special music by the choir. Sunday school at 9 a. m. Lee B. Nusbaum, Supt. All heartily invited. Second Baptist Fourteenth and G streets. Rev. W. W. Russell pastor. Preaching services 10:30 a. m. and 7:30 p. m. Morning subject, "The Gospel Message." Evening subject, "Preach the, Word." Sunday school 2 p. m. Come and worship with us. ' South Eighth Street Friends' H. R. Keates, pastor. 9 a. m. Bible school; 10:30 a. m. meeting for worship; 3 p. m. union open air meeting at Starr park; 6:30 p. m. gospel service under the auspices of the Home Mission committee. A cordial invitation is ex tended to all, especially to any who may be without local church affiliation. The annual Sunday school and congregational picnic will take place on. Tuesday afternoon next, June 30th at Glen Miller park. United Brethren Corner Eleventh and North B streets. M. Hobson pastor. Second anniversary. Sermon by Bishop G. M. Mathews. D. D., of Chicago, at 10:30 a. m. The bishop will preach to the Brotherhood at 7:30 p. m. Sunday school at 9:15 a. m.; Y. P. C. U. at 6:45 p. m. All are cordially invited. Universaiist Rhoda Temple. Rev. Martha G. Jones will preach on Sunday at 10:30 a. m. and 7:30 p. m. The evening sermon will be the last in the series on the Lord's Prayer. Sunday school at 9:15 a. m. East Main Street Friends Bible school 9:10 a. m.; meeting for worship 10:30 a. m.; Christian Endeavor 6:30 p. m.; open air meeting 7:30 p. m. Roy Lacey will sing that impressive song, "Face to Face." First Christian Corner Tenth and South A streets. Samuel W. Traum. pastor. Bible school, 9:05 a. m.. Prof. Albert Jones superintendent. Preaching services at 10:30 a. m. and 7:30 p. m., conducted by the pastor. Morning subject, "The Four Safe-guards of the Christian Life." Evening subject, "The Gift of Power." At 6:30 the Christian Endeavor society will present a special program dealing with the great "Inland Empire," that vast territory comprising the two Dakotas, Idaho, Wyoming and Montana. It is believed that this meeting will be of such vital interest that all members of the society as well as the church should arrange to be present. North A Street Friends' First day school at 9:15; meeting for worship at 10:30. Mid week meeting for worship Wednesday morning at 10 o'clock. Adult school for both men and women 8 to 9 a. m. Sunday morning. Second English Lutheran Corner Pearl and Northwest Third streets. Rev. G. Emerson Harsh, pastor. Sunday school at 9:15 a. m.; preaching by the pastor at 10:30 a. m. and 6:30 P. m. Morning theme, "Testimony of Christ." Evening, "As Children of Light." The evening service, will be held on the church lawn. All are invited to attend. Whitewater Friends' Corner North Tenth and G streets. Theodore Candler pastor. First day school 9 a. m., A. L. Ellis superintendent- Meeting for worship 10:30 a. m.; Christian Endeavor meeting 6:30 p. m. Topic, "Henry Martyn and His India." The choir will give special music at morning service. , Third M. E. 10:30 a. m. sermon. Rev. T. M. Guild; 7:30 p. m. temperance lecture bv Pastor A. H. Keima. Subject "Man's Relation to Man." 9:S0 a. m. Sunday school; 6:30 p. m. Epworth League. First Presbyterian Thomas J. Graham pastor. Bible school 9:15 a. m.; Divine worship 10:30 a m. The pas

at the Churches.

tor will preach on "God's Glory in Concealment." 3 p. m. open air meeting at Starr park with sermon by Rev. Alfred T. Ware. Evening meeting 7:30 p. m. Address on "The Later Ministry of Jesus," illustrated by the Tissot paintings. Stereopticon Slides. Mid-week meeting Thursday 7:30 p. m. Strangers and visitors invited. First Baptist H. Robert Smith, pastor. Preaching by the pastor at 10:30 a. m. and at 7:20 p. m. Sunday school at 9:15 a. m.; B. Y. P. U. at 6:30 p. m. All are cordially invited to attend these services. First M. E. Corner Main and Fourteenth streets. R. J. Wade, pastor. Sunday school at 9:15 a, m.. Prof. D. R. Ellabarger, superintendent Brief address by Bishop F. W. Warne, of India. Morning worship at 10:30. Sermon by pastor on "The Attractive Influence of Christ." Class meeting at 11:45; union service at 3 p. m. at Starr park; Enworth League at 6:30 p. m.; evening service at 7:30. Address by Bishop F. W. Warne, L. L. D., of India. Special music by choir in charge of J. Leroy Harris. A cordial welcome to all strangers, visitors and friends. Reid Memorial United Presbyterian Corner Eleventh and North A streets. Rev. S. R. Lyons, pastor. Preaching by the riastor 10:30 a. m. and 7:30 p. m. Tissot pictures of Life of Christ at the Sabbath school, 9:15 a. m. Christian union 6:30 p. m. Bucklen's Arnica Salve Wins. Tom Moore, of Rural Route 1, Cochran, Ga., writes: "I had a bad sore come on the instep of my foot and could find nothing that would heal it until I applied Bucklen's Arnica Salve. Less than half of a 25 cent box won the day for me by affecting a perfect cure." Sold under guarantee at A. G. Luken & Co. drug store. SEEiNG SICILY. Not to Know Thia Iiland la Kot to Know Greece. There are some lands which have always laid h spell upon the mind, upou the imagination, upon the heart. Greece, above all other countries, has entrauced the mind. The imagination has ever loved the east E.ypt, the Indies, forgotten Asia, the almost as mysterious Asia of today. For most of us the home land is the country of the heart; for many, it may be, it is Palestine, where was lighted the fire at which the hearts of Incalculable millions are still warmed. Others are content to say with Emerson in the fine essay on "Heroism," "That country is the fairest which is Inhabited by the noblest minds." But. above all other lands, there i one which has at once impressed) the mind, the imagination and the heart of western peoples. When a famous poet declared that on his heart would be found engraved the word Italy the words voiced the emotion of a multitude in every country of Europe and In the great northern continent oversea. To see Sicily, the old "Garden of the Sun," as the poets have loved to call It, is not to see Italy, though there may ba a measure of truth in Goethe s remark v. in ithat not to know Sicily is not to know i Italy. In a sense one might more truly say of Sicily that not to know It is not to know Greece. In another sense, however, we have In this most beautiful of islands the Intensification of Italv. Whatever is most Itahan is in evidence here, though it is Italian of j the south and not of the north. What mi If divirlf them la known onlv t.i those familiar with the whole penin - sula. William Sharp in Century. Xot Irish.' I Those who are not Irishmen some-1 times trespass on Irish property. A ' French cure, preaching about sudden j death, said. "Thus it is with us we go to bed well and get up stone dead!" An old French lawyer writing of an j estate he had just bought added, "There i is a chapel upon it in which my wifa ! and I wish to be buried, if God spares our lives." A merchant who died suddenly left ' In his bureau a letter to one of his cor- j respondents which he had uot sealed, j His clerk, seeing It necessary to send i the letter, wrote at the bottom, "Since writing the above I have died." A Sentiment and an Antojrraph. A certain young lady, so the story runs, wrote to 1 Marion Crawford, the novelist, requesting that he send her a bit of sentiment and his autograph. The reply was: Dear Misa A. When you request a favor that Is of Interest o:i!y to yourself, please lrcloye a tvo cent stamp. There's your sentiment, nnd here's your autograph. F. MARION CRAWFORD. Collier's Weekly. A Simple Precaution. Landlady (of country inn on the eve ot" a popular holiday to her daughter, who is kneading the dough for a cake Resei, you'd better put a couple n' eggs and a bit of butter into the cake. It looks as if we were goin to have a storm, and if the townsfolk don't stir out tomorrow we shall have to eat i ourselves. From the German. Ijiascxe. Language is a solemn thing. i grows out of life out of Its agsnies and ecstasies, its wants and its weariness. Every language is a temple ic which the sonl of those who speak it ir enshrined. O. W. Holmes. f eminine Fineaae. Duffer My wife got n fiver out of me today with one happy remaii. Puffer I-et's have it. Duffer She told our boy Willie that she was his nearest relative, but that I was his closest. Indianapolis Star. Every ds.-y 13 a hew life, every sunrise but a new birth. Jordon. The sun shines brighter: skies are bluer, and a feeling of youth and strength creeps over the whole body. Take Hollister's Rocky Mountain Tea. the greatest building up and health giving remedy ever offered. 35 cents, Tea or Tablets. A. G. Luken &. Co.

5rsATf: Good housewives Flour.

prefer Gold Medal BJlLOMB.

THE SCRAP

He Won the Dog. A minister, walking aloes the street one day. saw a crowd of boys sitting in a ring, with a small dog in the center. When he came up to them he asked: "What are you doing to the dog?" One little boy said, "Whoever tells the biggest He wins It." "I am surprised at you little boys, for when I was like you I never told a lie." There was a silence for awhile, until one of the boys shouted, "Hand him up the dog!" TEARS. Not In the tlma of pleasure Hop doth et her bow. But In the sky of sorrow. Over the vale of woe. j I Through sloom and shadow look wt 1 On beyond the years. I The soul would have no rainbow Had the eyes no tears. Century. Unseemly Bravado. The mountainous waves threatened to engulf the struggling ship at any ! moment. The captain ordered a bos 1 of skyrockets and flares brought to the rail and with his own hands ignited them in the hope that they would make known his distress to some passing ship. j Amid the rockets' glare an austere , Individual made his way to the rail and reproved the captain as follows: j "Captain, I must protest against thia unseemly bravado. We are now fac-1 ing death. This is no time for a celebration." Everybody's. Correct. "Now, can any of you tell me what is water?" asked the teacher at the end of an object lesson. "Please, teacher, water's what turns black when you put your bands in it!" Infantile Knowledge. Little Rosalie, aged six, was watching her mother label some glasses of preserves. "Mother," said she suddenly, "what kind of preserves does God make?" "Why, God doesn't make preserves, Rosalie." "Yes. he does, mother. I say It every Sunday in Sunday school. The teacher says, "Why should you love and serve God?' and we say, 'Because he makes preserves and redeems us.' " Lipplncott's. Some Thoughts on Love. It Is difficult to know at what moment love begins. It Is less diflicult to know it has begun. A thousand heralds proclaim it to the listening air; a thousand messengers betray it to the eye. Tone, act. attitude, and look, the signals upon the countenance, the electric telegraph of touch all these betray the yielding citadel before the word itself is uttered which, like the key surrendered, opens every avenue and gate of entrance and reuders retreat impossible. Longfellow. To write a good love letter you ought to begin without knowing what you mno y Tr cat on1 flnloh to I It tut .. . . ... knowing what you have written.Rousseau. The first symptom of true love in a young man is timidity; In a girl it is boldness. The two sexes have a tendency to approach, and each assumes the qualities of the other. Hugo. His Preference. A little boy was sitting on one of the benches In Central park. New York. watching people ride the donkeys. An exceedingly fat woman hired a donkey and was about to mount when she saw the small boy and said to him. "Little boy, don't you want me to hire a donkey for you too?" "No, thank you. I'd rather sit here and laugh." Ladles' Home Journal. A Baptismal Episode. An eminent judge when asked about the facility with which he turned from one case to another replied that he had learned that from what he saw at a Daptism or coiorea people wnen ne i was a boy. The weather was very cold, so that to immerse the candidates they were obliged to cut away the ice . ai It befell that when one of the female converts was dipped back into the wa- j ter the cold made her squirm about,! and In a moment she had slipped from the preacher's hands and was down the stream under the ice. The preacher, however, was not disconcerted. Looking up with perfect calmness at the crowd on the bank, be said: "Brethren, this sister hath departed. Hand me down another." Dumas and the Thermometer. One day when Dumas pere was manager of the Theatre Historique he happened to meet an old friend whom he had not seen for thirty years. "Where are you going to dine tonight?" he asked the friend. "Tonight I shall dine nowhere," was the answer. "Oh, no," said Dumas; "you are mistaken. You will dine with me." And he led the friend into his house and gave him the upper place at his table. Evidently the poor man had not had such a dinner for a long time. So the generous hearted Dumas at the end of the meal casually remarked: "It Is a matter of course that I ex pect you tomorrow at the same time." , The friend came the next day and j the day after this, and so on for ten years up to his death. One day he J told D'"Tias that as be was eating ; bread . t he did not earn this ar-' rangement could not continue. j "If I am not able honestly to earn i my meals. I shall not come again. Tell me in what way I can be of service to you." Dumas thought a moment, then said: "You can do me a great favor. You may go to the new bridge every day and .ke the temperature by Chevalier's thermometer. The temperature, you must know, is of great moment in the matter of the sale of tickets. Could you do this?" The poor fellow answered affirmatively and from that time on reported to Dumas every day: "At noon the thermometer showed w arji.go mans desrefjj: ia-the shads."

'And Dumas, who of "course dI3? not care in the least about the temperature, replied with the same regularity: "I am very much obliged. If you only knew what a service you are doing me!" Harper's. Cause For Envy. "Many a married woman envies you your place here as a cook for us, Bridget." "Yes'm 'cause I can leave and thej can't" Lipplncott's. Expensive. nis restless nature had made him a torment to his teacher at times, and one afternoon she kept him after the others were dismissed and bad a serious talk with him. "I certainly wIU have to ask your father to come and see me." "Don't you do it." "Why not?" inquired the teacher. " 'Cause he's a doctor and charges 2 a visit." In the Wrong Flock. Mrs. Philpots came panting downstairs on her way to the temperance society meeting. "Addie, run up to my room and get my blue ribbon rosette, the temperance badge," she directed her maid. "You will know It, Addie blue ribbon and gold lettering." "Yes'm, I knows it right well." Addie had no trouble in finding it and fastening it properly on the dress of her mistress. At the meeting Mrs. Philpots was too busy greeting her friends to note thai they smiled when they shook hands with her. When she reached home supper was served, so she went directly to the dining room, where the other members of the family were seated. "Gracious me, mother!" exclaimed her son. "That bine ribbon you have not been wearing that at the temperance meeting?" "Why, what is it, Harry?" asked the good woman, clutching at the ribbon in surprise. "Why, mother dear, didn't you know that was the ribbon I won at the show ?" The gold lettering on the ribbon read: "Interstate poultry show. First prize. Bantum." Ladles Home Journal. When Lincoln Swore. It is said that the only time Lincoln was ever beard really to swear was on the occasion of his receiving a telegram from Burnside, who had been ordered to go to the relief of Rosecrans at Chattanooga, who was In great danger of an attack from Bragg. Burnside telegraphed from Jonesboro, far ther away from Rosecrans than he wai when he received the order to hurry toward him. When Burnside's telegram was placed in Lincoln's hands he said, "Damn Jonesboro!" He then telegraphed Burnside as follows: V Sept. 21. 1863. If you are to do any -ood to Rosecrans, it will not do to waste time at Jonesboro. A. LINCOLN. May Have Succeeded at Home. A physician went rabbit shooting and returned, tired out and empty handed, telling bis wife he hadn't killed a thing. Thereupon she remarked: "1 told you so. If you bad stayed at home and attended to your legitimate business, you might have been more successful." Prudence. A tall man. impatiently pacing the platform of a wayside station, accost ed a boy of about twelve. "S-s-say," he said, "d-d-do y-you kaos h-h-how late this train is?" The boy grinned, but made no repiy. The man stuttered out something about kids In general and passed Into the station. A stranger asked the boy why be hadn't answered the big man. "D-d-dye wanter see me g-g-get rot fa-fa-face punched? D-d-dat big g-guy'd fink I was mo-mo-mocking him." Everybody's. No Exceptions to This Rule. "Willie." said a fond mother, "you 2 r" ft 1 1 Or tA4 ASvlv T?OPlw fV duvuiu V sja uatij W s-ri and to m.kM - m,n he.uhv. wealthy and wise yoa know. Tou KhnilM rt tn v, -,th th -nn -n, chickens go to bed with the sun.' "Yes. I know they do, mamma, but the old hen she always goes with em!" She Wanted to Know. It was at a New York Symphony orchestra concert conducted by Walter Damroech. The audience was anticipating an exquisite rendition of choice selections from some famous composers, conspicuous among whom wai Richard Wagner, the opening number In this instance being one of bis compositions. As was usual, the leading performers of the orchestra as they appeared upon the platform were met with enthusiastic applause, the climax being I reached with the appearance of Mr. I Dam rose h himself. When the -excitement had somewhat j subsided and the concert was about to begin a well dressed woman, seated j quite near the front, turned to the woj man beside her and said in an audible j voice, "Pardon me, but would you kindly tell me which one Is Wagner?" A Hard Task. With a scowling brow the vaudeville agent awaited the next applicant. A long, lanky individual came to his desk and in funereal tones said. "Good day, sir." "Well, what do you want?" "I need a Job Just now about as much as anything else," answered the lean person. "Ever had any experience?" "Oh, Indeed. I have been with" "Chop it short. I know you've been with all the big stars from Hamlet to omelet. That doesn't cut any freeze with me. What's your line?" "I I I'm a a a comedian." "Well, then, make me laugh." Lipplncott's. Thrifty Tenement Dwellers. Coarressoan -Jasob Bapaert of.2?ew

BOOK

York represents one of the most congested districts In the metropolis. Thinking the people who live in tenements might want to plant seeds la boxes on the window sills and fire escapes, he sent an assortment ot hU quota of garden seeds to the inhabitants of a model tenement Just built by a friend of his. I.ater he received a letter reading: My Dear Ruppert Please send no mora seeds to the people who live tn my mode) tenements. I went there today, and I nnd they are all raising cabbages, cucumbers and tomatoes In the bathtubs. Fun With the Conductor. He boarded the train at St. PauL bound for Seattle. As the conductor passed through the car he asked how far it was from St. raul to Seattle. "Sixteen hundred and twenty miles," the official answered. The next tima the conductor came along the man again asked him bow far it was from Seattle to St. PauL "See here, my man," said the conductor pompously. It's 1,620 miles from St Paul to Seattle, and it's 1.620 miles from Seattle to St. Paul." "Maybe so." said the little man modestly. "I didn't know. You see, It'a only seven days from Christmas to New Year's, but It's a long time from New Year's to Christmas." Ladies' Home Journal. My World. I live in two worlds, one In which X most consider the weather and clothes and meals and bills coming dne and a host of duties and obligations, some of which weary me. It isn't really a bad world, and I haven't much ground to complain of it. It la comparatively a poor world, however, when set against that other world into which I retire with every opportunity tha glorious, free and perfect world of my Imagination. The common workL the world of meals and clothes and weather, I share with everybody. No preference or special consideration Is given to me. X often get a kick or a cuff that I despise, even though I know that I earned it But tha other world la all my own. I am Its creator, king and master. Nothing happens In it that does not please me; nothing exists without my consent. It revolves around me; I am Its sun and center; all else Is subordinate. There la no order, system or law In it that gives me the slightest trouble, for I alter, change or abolish these at my pleasure. Of coarse I escape whenever I can from the common everyday world In which I am so insignificant Into the world which la wholly my own. Orlando J. Smith. Always One or the Other. "But why did you leave your last place?" the lady asked of the would be cook. 'To tell the truth, mum, I just couldn't stand the way the master an the missus used to quarrel, mum." "Dear me! Do you mean to say that they actually used to quarrel?" -YIs, mum, all the time. When it wasn't me an' him. It waa me an' her." Everybody's. Why the Blade Is Curved. Corporal Sandhurst wss drilling batch of raw recruits. "Why is It," he said to a bright looking chap, "that the blade of your saber is curred instead of straight?" "The blade Is curved," the recruit answered, "in order to give more force to the blow." "Nonsense ! said the corporal. "The blade is curved so as to fit the scabbard. It It waa straight, how would you get it Into the curved scabbard, yon idiot?" The Waiter's Preference, At a dinner one day some men were discussing the merits of different species of game. One preferred canvasback duck, another woodcock, and still another thought a quail the most delicious article of food. The discussion and the dinner ended at about the same time. "Well, Frank," said one of the men, turning to the waiter at his elbow, who was as good a listener as he was a waiter, "what kind of game do yoa like best?" "Well, masse, to tell yon the trufe, almost any kind of gameU suit me, but what I like best Is an American eagle served on a silver dollar." "The Frolicsome Baste. A lady and gentleman took a short excursion somewhat early one morning, and the horse commenced kicking In such an extraordinary way that. Instead of becoming alarmed, tbey laughed heartily at the oddity and obstinacy of the animal, which, sided by the apologies snd explanations of the driver, were ludicrous. "Look now, ma'am, it's the quietest baste in Ireland" (kick. kick), "but it's a small taste frolicsome out of play" (kick, kick, kick). (Aside to the horse) "111 give it to ye, ye baste, when I git ye home, to be exposing me this way." (Aloud) "It's the blood ye see. sir. the rale quality blood tbsfs in it sure his mother won the plate at the Curragh o Kildare. and it's only too quiet this craythure is" (kick). (Aside) "Ah. ye venomous sarpint, ye'r at it aginr (Aloud) "except when it goes out too early of a mornln. It understands the fashions, and I never get much good of him before tin or half past tin, anyway." On the return the man was amply repaid. He turned over and over the money in his hand, glancing np and around with an expression of cunning not easily forgotten. "Are yon not satisfied V wss the natoral inquiry. "Oh, yes, quite satisfied, and I'm sure yer honor war satisfied, too only the lady laughed so hard at the baste's tricks that I thought your honor would give me another little sixpence." Hollister's Rocky Mountain Tea should be a toilet necessity of every lady of social prominence. Makes bright, happy dispositions, perfect complexions. The greatest blood and skin remedy. 33 cents. Tea or Tablets. A. G. Luken tc Co.