Richmond Palladium (Daily), Volume 33, Number 107, 1 June 1908 — Page 5

TTTE RICITMOXD PALLADIUM AI SUN-TELEGRAM. 31 OX DAY, JUNE 1, 1908.

PAGE FIVE.

A Lasting Effect

fhls Evidence Should Prove Every Claim Made for Doan'a Kidney Pills In Richmond. Relief from the pains and aches of a bad back Is always welcome to evcnr backache sufferer; but to euro a lame weak or aching back is what'a wanted. Cure It so It will stay cured. It can be done. Here's the strongest evidence to prove it. Mrs. F. Heater, of 607 North Thirteenth street, Richmond, Ind., oays: "My son, while working one day wrenched his back, and believing it had affected his kidneys, he got a box of Doan's Kidney Pills from A. . Lufcen & Co.'s drug store. After taking a few doses the pain disappeared and he believes Doan's Kidney fills a fine remedy for backache." For sale by all dealers. Price 50 cents. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, New York, sole agents for the United States. Remember the name Doan's and take no other. FARMERS OF WEST VERY PROSPEROUS Have All the Money They Need At the Present Time. Chicago, 111., May 30. The note of prosperity Is very marked in the farm regions of the West, a fact which goes to illustrate how largely the material welfare of the nation rests upon agriculture. The newspapers of the great agricultural states of the West report that the farmers have money in hand and read with amazement the story of lingering panic conditions in the East. We are told that states which were formerly large borrowers of Eastern money no longer need such help. BANISHED THE BORE. A Remedy That Dampened Hi Ardor For Sitting. The head of a bureau in an Important government department has long teen afflicted with a friend who calls upon him regularly and sits down and Its and sits and goes on sitting till cssault and battery becomes a virtue. The other day this sedentary bore was In the full exercise of his functions when suddenly the official, who had teen scrutinizing him closely, cried: "I knew it! I was sure of it! Confound those office boys, with their tricks on strangers! They've been putting glue on your chair again. Ill, Jimrnie, bring a sponge and a pail of water!" And, pressing with all his weight on the shoulders of his victim to keep him Clown, he continued: "Don't stir; you'd tear the cloth sure. Nothing Is half so adhesive as glue on a cane seat chair. Here, Jimmie, moisten this gentleman no that we can get him loose. Don't spare the water; the cloth won't shrink or fade." The faithful messenger obeys, and when the operation is concluded the official conducts the visitor to the door and bids him farewell, with the remark: "Perhaps you want to hurry home and change your clothing, so I won't keep you. C uniby. bless you! If four trousers are spoiled, let me know, find I'll stop the price of them out of the pay of the infernal scoundrel if I can find out who he was, and to that task I will devote all the energies of my lifetime and the whole machinery of the government Goodby! The scoundrel! I thought for several days past that there was something wrong." Ills friend goes like the visions of youth, never to return. Argonaut. COIN SWEATING. An Illegal Practice Which Hai Fallen Into Disuse. Closely allied to the making of counterfeit corns and usually combined with that nefarious trade is what Is known as "sweating," which requires considerable si: ill to accomplish successfully. s U!;er mold Is used. Into which a gi'i, ..i to be sweated Is introduced aim i i lJ with a clip. Copper wires having been adjusted, the coin is Immersed In a bath of cyanide of potassium and an electric battery set going. The action of the electricity upon the coin in the acid uniformly sweats the metal that is to Fay, causes so much of it to become detached This process is gone through with a large number of coins, and the gold deposit thus obtained is extracted from the acid. It id for the purpose of detecting the existence of such reduced coins that bankers weigh gold coins in a balance, j and if one is in the scale It will imme- j diately be shown by the Indicator. The j light coin is then taken out, and what- ! aver the shortage represents that j amount the customer will have to ! make up or be fined. 3ut, all things considered, sweating j Is but a poor business, says H. L. j Adam in his interesting book, "The Story of Crime." and evidently it is thought so by the criminal fraternity, for it has dwindled to a mere nothing A sovereign weighs 123.27447 grains, and the limit of error in the weight is .2 of a grain, from which it may readily be pathered that sweating canrot now be a very lucrative business. -ondoa Tit-BUs. "How. l . ... -..l the l milsitivo boarder, "would you define : compliment?" "In love's warfare," replied ths di daetlo boarder, "a compliment is a sklrmirher sent out for the purpose of bringing on an engagement." Chicago fTribune. t -. . , . Delicious Chocolate Pie You Should Try This Recipe: t quart milk. 1 package "OUR-P1E" follow directions on package. Each package makes 2 pies. 3 kinds, Lenitn, Chocolate, 'Custard. 10c. Order hom any grocer-

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SOCIAL To Reach the Society Editor, Call The members of the Wednesday afternoon Duplicate Whist club, will be Mrs. William Bradbury, at her home, 308 North Fourteenth street. The affair will be complimentary to Mr3. i Shuman Jones of Los Angeles, California. The club has concluded the season, but summer social affairs such as picnics and. lawn parties will very probably be given during the summer months. Mrs. George Shaw, with her two children and nurse, Mrs. Craighead, of Dayton, Ohio, tame over yesterday in their machine. They, with Mrs. Jo seph Craighead, were entertained at j dinner hy Mr. ana Mrs. ;,imon uraighead of North Eighth street. Mrs. Joseph Craighead entertained the party in the evening at dinner at her home on North Tenth street. tr - Mr. and Mrs. James McNeill have for their guest, this week, Mrs. Howard McNeill of Buffalo. New York. rMrs. Charles Kolp and daughter Elizabeth, were guests of friends at Union City yesterday. J Mrs. Anna Newby has gone to her former home in Richmond where she will join her brother, Mr. Webber of Topeka. Kansas. Indianapolis News. .. ' Mrs. Charier. Kolp will give a May party Saturday afternoon for her class of young pupils at the home of Mrs. William I). Foulke on South Eighteenth street. A May pole will be one of the features of amusement for the little pt-ople. The members of the class are: Elizabeth Kolp. Marjory and Alice fJennett, Thelma and June Robinson, Winifred Comstock, and Helen Wrist, Richard and Charles Robinson, June Oayte, Roland and Arthur Hughes, Roll in Weist. Robert Morrlsson and Cleveland Chase. The members of the East End dancing club aro making arrangements for a dinner party to le given in the near future in the pavilion at Jackson park in honor of Mr. and Mrs. Henry Gennett of East Main street. After the dinner party the hours will bo spent at dancing. Several invited guests will be present. . A very charming dinner party was given yesterday at the home of Mr. and Mrs. Charles Neff, near East Germantown. Mrs. Neva Hurst, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Noff was the honor guest. Mrs. Hurst is a recent bride and many beautiful gifts were received. At high noon an elaborate three course dinner was served. The at home guests number fifty. Tlio out of town guests were Mr. L. J. Mannix of Greenville. Ohio, Mr. and Mrs. Hussey and Miss Harriet of Milton, Mr. Glen Brumfield of Centerville, Mr. and Mrs. Ben Hiser, Mr. and Mrs. George Heckathorn, and Mr. Addison Hurst ,all of this city; Mr. George Hiser of Bloomington and Mr. and Mrs. Elmer Walker of Lafayette. t 8 The Trifolium literary society will hold their annual banquet this evening at the First English Lutheran church. This affair will conclude the season for the society. jo jo The following young people formed a picnic party near Greensfork decoration day: Misses Hilda Sieweke and Esther Hoppe. Messrs. Early Hinef end Carl White. . u Mr. and Mrs. John Teeter and Mr. and Mrs. Charles Teeter of Hagerstown, with Mr. and Mrs. Albert Rost. spent yesterday, the guests of Mr. and Mrs. Woolley who reside on the New Paris pike. e Mr. and Mrs. Leo Ashley entertained at dinner last evening at the Country club house. KL 0 Mr. Waldrip, Mr. F. L. Torrence, Mr. John Reuter, Mr. George Seidel, Mr. John Thompson, Dr. Frank Harold, Dr. C. S. Bond. Mr. Isaac Wilson, Mr. Frank Braffett, were entertained in a most charming manner Saturday by the members of the Fort Wayne Country club. A luncheon and dinner party were given in their honor. After dinner the guests were taken to town where they spent the remainder of the day at the Wayne club. J Professor and Mrs. R. L. Saekett formerly of Earlham college, but now of Purdue university, were guests in this city, tho latter part of the week, jo jo The June century will publish a novel feature in the text of tho three great songs of Yalo. Harvard and Princeton in the 'OO's, set in eight pages of whimsically clever drawings by John Wolcott Adams. v Mr. and Mrs. James Hart of Cincinnati, who have been guests of Mr. and Mrs. Henry C Starr, of 2uS North Tenth street, have returned home. The special musical program given last evening at the First Presbyterian church, by the choir, under the direction of Professor Will Earhart. was successful in every way. Beautiful solos were rendered by Miss Bertha Garver and Mr. Thvrraan Overman of Earlham college. Miss Louiscv Millikan of Nev,- Cnstle, will be In the recital to be given by Miss Laura Gaston. Miss Millikan has appeared in recitals several times in this city. She has a wonderful voice and is also an accomplished pianist. She is a niece of Mrs. W. S. Kaufman of National avenue. Mrs. Leonard Lemon left today for California, where she will spend the summer months. Mr. and Mrs. Kibbey will occupy the Lemoa home on

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e i NEWS Home Phcne 1121, or Eell Phone 21 g fa South Eleventh street during Mrs. Lemon's absence from the city. Mrs. Hogan of Holyoko, Mass.. is the guest of Mrs. Likins of 36 South Eleventh street. si Mrs. Oliver Gaar and Mrs. Richard : Study have issued invitations to an "at Homo," Friday afternoon at the home of Mrs. Gaar on East Main , street. j j Mr. and Mr. H. C. Starr Mr. and 1 Mrs. James Hart and child of Clncin- i nati and Mrs. George Love, formed a j dinner party a the Country club house Satuniay evening, .4 Miss Katharine McGrath has returned to her home in Dayton, O.. after having visited for several weeks with Mrs. John Harrington. Miss McGrath has been the honor guest at many social functions during her visit in this city. Mrs. W. L. King entertained at cards, Mrs. Timothy Harrington gave a dinner party in her honor. Miss Laura Schatz also entertained at cards complimentary to Miss McGrath. Numerous other affairs were given. t& The June meeting of the Womn's Foreign Missionary society of the Grace M. E. church will be held with Mr. and Mrs. Alonzo Girton, East of the city. Wednesday afternoon. This will be the time for the Quarterly silver offering. The affair will be in the nature of a picnic. Each member is requested to bring a well filled basket. Friends of the society are also invited to be present. J Mr. Ferdinand Kolling of Miamisburg, Ohio visited his brother H. II. Kolling of this city yesterday. ?t Mr. and Mrs. B. M. Thomas entertained Mr. and Mrs. William Brooks, Misse3 Hazel and Esther Brooks, all of Fountain City and Mrs. Merrill Kdgerton of Gainesville, Fla., at dinner yesterday. j Miss Ella Lyon of Pittsburg and Miss Lillian Taggart are the guests of Mrs. W. A. Sample of North Thirteenth street. v i S One of the important social events at Indianapolis this week is the wedding of Mr. Charles Porter Jameson and Miss Gertrude Elizabeth Oarr of that city. The affair will take place Saturday. Mr. and Mrs. W. E. Jameson and Miss Helen Jameson of this city with several others are expected to be in attendance. St S Mrs. Lizzie Hodgin will be hostess for a meeting of the Spring Grove Sewing circle tomorrow afternoon at her home in Spring Grove. The wearing of many rings has gone out of fashion. The wearing of one on the little finger is the reigning style. Every young girl thinks she Is out of the fashion unless she has one. If she is a school girl it is usually a heavy gold, spreading out on top Into a plain seal, with the school motto or her fraternity letters carved into it. If it isn't this it may be her own monogram or family crest that is carved on the gold. These are not set with precious stones. Anything so ornate would be Quite out of style. There are many, however, made of semi-precious stones, a whole one being used for the flat top of the ring. Jade, carbuncle, lapis lazuli, cat's eye. are among the semi-precious stones used. Initials or symbols can be carved on these. Such a ring is a very good looking touch to a young girl's hand. & J The Senior picnic will be held tomorrow at Jackson's Park. All members of the class are requested to take the car that leaves here at- ninethirty tomorrow morning. v t A card party will be given tomorrow afternoon at the Country club house for the members. . .4 Mr. and Mrs. J. Markle of near Webster entertained the following, Sunday: Mr. and Mrs. J. C. Billhelmer, of Indianapolis, Mr. and Mrs. Frank Lamar of Richmond, Mrs. N. Lamar of Hatrerstown. Miss Bessie Markle of Richmond, and Miss Ethel Coltrane, of Webster. J .4 k All the infant class and the pupils of Esther Fletcher's and Halsey Harold's class of South Eighth Street Friends' church please be at the Meeting House at four o'clock. Wednesday afternoon, June third, for rehears als for Children's Dav. PAST COMMANDER " RYANJTHE SPEAKER Participated in Cambridge City Memorial. Cambridge City. Ind.. June 1. The memorial services held at the Presbyterian church on Sunday morning were j of a very interesting character. The , church was beautifully decorated with j flags, flowers and forest boughs. A I pleasing feature of the occasion was) the singing by a class of small boys, i The address by Past Commander Ry-; an of Carlisle, Ind., was both eloquent ! and interesting. Fri-sh - What did the Indian dren play with? chilSoph With their war-whoops, of COUXMl

TURKISH IROOPS HARASS PEASANTS Exact Huge Bounty From Sofian Inhabitants.

London, May 30. A correspondent writing from Sofia of the present condition of affairs in Macedonia, says: The behavior of the Turkish troops towards the population shows little sign of improvement, although outrages on an extensive scale are less frequent than formerly. Th troops, for whose maintenance the Macedonian treasury is depleted and the civil administration starved, are largely occupied, not in the arduous pursuit of the insureent bands, but in the less irksome duty of searching the villages for arms and exacting ransom from the peasants, who have already been taxed to the uttermost farthing for the support of these inefficient protectors, and have furthermore paid toll to the various bands in their neighborhood. URGE PROTECTION OF WILD ANIMALS German Society Enters a Protest. Berlin, May r.o. The German society for the protection: of wild animals is to protest against Professor Koch's proposal that the larger wild animals in the African colonies be exterminated, since, they harbor the testse fly, which feeds upon their blood. The president of the society, the Duke of j Hatibor. urged, on the contrary, t hat the example of the London Zoological!' society awl of the British society for the preservation of the Fauna of the empire, be followed and that every j means be taken to preserve froia ex- j tinctioii the wild animals in the Ger man African colonies. THE QUEST OF BEAUTY. "Making Up" Is a Very Ancient Feminine Art. " "Making up," as applied to the appearance, is by no means as modern an art as many people Imagine. In the days of Ilornan supremacy the women tinted their eyebrows with black in emulation of "ox eyed Venus." They painted their faces, sprinkled themseives with perfume and even wore false hair or tinted their own locks in accordance with the prevailing fashion. The Greek ladies of the same period employed maids who rubbed out their mistress wrinkles, "decorated" her face with red and white paint and darkened her eyebrows. It was then also the fashion to coat the face with white of egg and goose grease to protect it from the sun and wind. It is even said that they had a recipe for turning blue eyes to black. These fashions all had their origin In Italy, where in later years the notorious Lucrezia Borgia Is said to have dyed her hair different colors, accord-i ing to her fancy of the moment. In England in the eighteenth century many women, among them Lady Coventry, died from the effects of rouge. So in all ages "beauty at all costs" was the motto of "smart" ladles. Pearson's Weekly. Tennyson's Terror. There are many stories of Tennyson In the Duke of Argyll's book, "Fassages From the Past," and one of the most characteristic relates to the time when the marriage of bis grace, then the Marquis of Lome, and Princess Louise was in the air. One day Tennyson had a number of guests at luncheon, among whom was the Marquis of Lorne. In the course of talk the marquis told Tennyson, then poet laureate, that the queen liked his new volume. "I am glad to . hear it," Tennyson said In his sonorous, slow, musical bass voice. "I have given a good account of her In that volume, but the newspapers don't like my rhymes say they are bad. I live in terror." he continued, "of any of the queen's family marrying and of bearing from her that she hopes I will write something. I have no news of that kind yet, but I live in terror of it" This with a solemnly sly wink. Hitting the Pipe. When Jones got home the other nighl be found the family In a panic and th house being flooded from a burst water pipe. The first thing he did was tc scold his wife for not having sense enough to go down to the cellar and hammer up the supply pipe to prevent the water from escaping. Then be went downstairs and was soon heard hammering vigorously. After some minutes' strenuous work, giving oue last mighty blow, he asked, "How Is it now?" "There is no difference in the flow of the water," his wife calmly replied. "but as the light has gone out I very ! much fear you have hammered up the ' gas pipe." Exchange. The Garden cf Eden. The passage in Genesis in which the location of the garden of Eden seems to be Indicated has long been a bono of contention among theologians and iii bie students generally. The discussion of the subject bas been as ingenious :is it has been fruitless. Tbe garden has been located all over As'a. The Biblical account w.u!d seem to place Eden in the old Mesopotamia, the region of the "great rivers." the Euphrates and Tigris. New York American. Not Really Necessary. Weeping Kelative Oh. my dear, tbe doctor says be doesn't expect you to live much longer! Stubborn InvalidYes, but won't you please pause and think of how long I have lived already without any expectations on his part? Chicago News. HlI-riEilARDK : (ioH Ms-rl V- Flour pleases th cook. VBrDKBICA.

AM

Light Calico. Black Calico. Gray Calico Fancy Border. Shirting Calico, Calico Fancy Borders. THE

THE PEOPLE'S Open Evenings. Both Phones.

THE. Coin of the Realm. During civil war times Gilinan Fay, a local character known by all as Gil, went to the general store in Fayville, Mass., kept at that time by Colonel Dexter Fay, to make his purchase. Tho amount was GS cents, a ad Fay tendered the clerk a dollar bill. Change being scarce In the store, as was often the case during those strenuous times, the clerk passed him some slips of pa per with figures on them to equal the amount of change due. Gil looked at the change and then at the clerk and slowly said, "What's all this?" "Why, that is what we are giving for change now. When you get a dollar's worth we will redeem them," replied the clerk, and Gil went out, A day or two later Gil went to the store again for some tobacco. The clerk passed out the plug, and Gil put his hand In his pocket and pulled out a handful of pumpkin seeds and hauded them to the clerk, saying: "These are what I am using for change now. When you get a dollar's worth I will redeem them." Priest and Parishioner There was a priest who had among his parishioners an Irishman who, with a lot of others, was digging a ditch under an Italian boss. The priest thought he would get a rise out of his parishioner as he met him going to work. "Good morning,. Pat." "Mornin', father." "How do you like your 'glnny' boss. Pat?" "Oh, all right; father. How do you like yours?' The Exception, colored circus poster, were compari-? the merits of the old time circus witb those of the up to date performance. "Der am no argument necessary," Baid Rastus emphatically. "It have been 'knowledged dat de John Robineoa circus am de best in de world." "What fo' you talk like dat, man?" Jackson replied. "Der am only one circus worf mentioning, and dat am de Barnum & Bi!ey greatest show on earth. Look at de picture, man! See where it say 'greatest show oa earth?' " "Shore Ah sees dat, but you neglect t look in de far corner where it say Eornethin' else." "What else it say?" "It say, 'greatest show on earth' S-E-P-T 1, 'cept one an' dat one am de John Robinson circus." Lipplncott's. Tried to Make Good. "What's become ob dat little chameleon Mandy bad?" inquired Rufus. "Oh. de fool chile done lost him," replied Zeke. "She wuz playin' wif hiai one day, puttin' him on red to see bim turn red and ou blue to see him turu b'ue an' ou green to see Lim turn green, an' so on; den de fool gal, not satisfied wif lettla' well enough aione. went an' put him on a plaid, an' de pour little thing went an' bust himself tryin' to make good." Everylody's. John's Memory A perspiring man, laden with bundles, bustled into a railway station, upset a small boy. carried away half a yard of rlounee from tLe skirt of a lady and finally stopped pituing an ' exhausted, beside a small woman si: ting tranquilly in the waiting room. "John" "There, now. I know wbat you argoing to say, Jane that sa:i;e old qn-.'.s tlon. My dear. 1 forgot nothing." "But. John" "No. I ilij not forger to buy tli fruit or tbe towels tr the seven an: three-quarter yards of cambric or th' spool of silli. There you are th whole list; not a tbiug mining." His wife smiled up Ir.to the trlaru phant face acd said. 'Yes. dear. bir. in which shop did you leave your bat V And then the train came in. A Loyal Partisan. "It was Ju?t after W. O. Bradley wa elected governor of Kentucky In 1905 and the Republicans In my county were hold In a biz ntifleaiioa jneetltis."

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All Kinds I All Prices ! Ike Low Priced Busy Store.

CALICO - im ii i ij) imiipi mill i,mu.m i 11 i i mi PEOPLE TRADE SCRAP said Colonel tt F. Tburneof ICentuvky. telling of one of his experiences. "Brass bands, all kinds of float and banners and hundreds of men and women and boys had been pnrading the street.?. A young girl claimed that while standing cn her front porch, which was almost covered with vines and foliage of different kinds, she was repeatedly hugged and kissed by a young man whom she hardly knew. A warrant I was sworn out for her assailant and ft was my duty as commonwealth attorney to prosecute him. I soon finished my examination of the witness and turned her over to defendant's counsel for cross examination. " 'What night was this?' he thundered. " 'Thursday night,' answered the wit- j uess. "'Thursday night, you say? What time of night?" " 'About 8 o'clock.' " 'That was about the time the parade was passing your house?' " 'Yes. sir. the parade was Just passing my house. - 'Street full of people? " 'Yes, sir, the streets were full of people.' "'Did you ever cry out or scream? "'No. sir. I did not.' " 'Will yon please tell this Jury why, with the streets thronged with people and this man hugging and kissing you against your will, as you claim, you never uttered a single cry for help or assistance? "'Yes, sir. I will tell the Jury and everybody else that you'll never ketch me hollerln' at no Republican gatherln'!' "Judge. Knew His Father. "Elnatban." asked the teacher of a boy at school. "If your father borrowed from you $100 and should agree to pay you at the rate of $10 per week, how much would he owe you at the end of seven weeks?" "One hundred dollars," said the boy. "I'm afraid you don't know your arithmetic, said the teacher. "Well," said the boy, "I may not know my arithmetic, but I know my father." Not Used to Women Doctors. The librarian of the University cf Wyoming at Laramie Is Dr. Grace R. Hebard, a lawyer by education and a doctor of philosophy. She is also an authoress, having writteu, among other things, a volume on "The History of Wyoming." Dr. Hebard and Dr. Agnes Wergr?'and, a memler of the faculty of the university, have a cozy home !n Laramie, which they call Doctors' Inn. A Ftranger called at Doctors' Ir.n to see Dr. Hebard concerning the third edition of h?r book on Wyoming. Ringlr.g the bell, l.e was met at th? door by the doctor bere:f. "I wish to see Dr. Hebard." "I am she." "Dr. G. R. Hebard. the author of The History of Wyoming? ' "The surre," "But I expected to find a can." "And why?" tl? doctor asked. "Never heard of a woman, and a young woman, being called a doctor and it takes my brea'h away" He recovereJ sufficiently, however, to transact tbe business satisfactorily. The Only Way He Could Hslp. 'us t ice Matthews, while presiding over the sj'jre court at WashV:

DR. A. 0. MARTIN DENTIST Now Permanently Located In Colonial Block.

. 923-927-920 IV! AIM STREET. FURNITURE BEDDING PICTURES

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els.

Light Blue Calico. Dark Blue Calico. Light Blue Calico Fancy Border. Grey Calico. Dark Blue Calico Fancy Border. AT STORE Cor. 9th and Main. BOOI X V took the severa? Justices of the court for a run down Chesapeake bay. A stiff wind sprang up. and Justice Gray was getting decidedly the worst of It. As he leaiifd over the rail In great distress Chief Justice Matthews touched him on the shoulder and tail In a tone of deepest sympathy, "Is there anything I can do for you. Gray?" "No. thank you." returned the alck Justice, "unless your honor can overrule this motion." Ladies Home Journal. Lating House Language. It takes the frequenter of New York'a cheap restaurant quite awhile to become familiar with the language la which his ordars for edlbie are transmitted to the ok. ne boou krna that "Beef and!" means beef and beans and that "Ham and!" refers to ham with the same nutritious vegetable. Before long he grasps the fact that "Draw one!" U an order for coffee. "Draw one in the dark!" meanlnj black coffee; that "Brown the wheats'" Is the correct command for buckwheat cakes, and that "Hash In the eteamer! Is the open se.ame to the supply of corned teef hash. Perhaps you may know eggs, fried oa one side, are ordered In Bowery eating houses as "White wings, sunny side up!" Recently a visitor ordered fried egs and gasped half a minute before he could answer the darky waiter's polite query: "Yes, air. Will yo' bab dem blind or lookln' at jo'V Foe's Fame. Many years ago an admirer of Edgar Allan Poe boarded the stage to drive to Fordham. then a suburb of New York city, where, la a small cottage Poe wrote many of his famous tales. "Why are you so anxious to go to Vorclhain?" asked the stage driver. "Because Poe lived there." "Poe wouldn't ha' been much thought of If he'd only lived at Fordham. It wasn't on that nccount he's famous. It was on account of them there pomes and tales." Systematic Abbreviation. "There's the laziest man who ever signed a hotel register." remarked the hotel clerk. "He's a drummer, and his name is Samuel Parker Sedgewick Elliott. Ten years ago be ured to sign his full name In a very deliberate and careful manner, using considerable Sourish. Then he liegan to abbreviate It slightly, Ilk this: " 'Samuel P. S. Elliott' "Then I noticed on the register 'Sam'l P. S. Elliott.' "TLe following trip disclosed a farther slight elision. 'S. P. 8. Elliott. "Coming In one eight rather bite, he took the proffered pen and wrote 'Sana Elliott. "On his arrival here last week I saw t? had the habit incurably. Here fa what he scmwlrd: 3. Eliot Music Sir George A Macfaren. late profewa. or of music In th t'nl-emity of Catn1 r: Igt- llsislauJ. gave the following ib-.'isiitioii (r music: "Music ia the art wh,Ij fiupioys oaiid as a medium of ar:l:-.ii xpres;on for what la not la the province of literature, of sculpture, of pa luting, of acting or of architecture, eui.'iodylfjg the Inward feelings of wbk-b all other arts can but exhibit the effect"