Richmond Palladium (Daily), 1 January 1902 — Page 6

KIC11MOND D IIL.Y PALL VD1U31, WEDNESDAY, JAXUARY i, 1002.

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TOO LITTLE ELEPHANT. Couldn't Meet the Expectation? Arouird ly Uoud Deal f Talk. lt In my luinesi. of -urs" said the ajrauce axeut. '"to work u as much iutert an possible iu the circus before it arrives, atnl one of my stroug points Is the animals bdonKiuK to the museum part of the show. Anything about a garage tijrer. a roaring lion or niatl elephant uiakcs the farmer itch for a closer siuht. ami as a penerul thing you can't pile it on too strung. I overdid matters once, however. We bad only one elephant with us that tteason. ami be was undersized anil nothing to brag of. but at a certain town In Indiana 1 wrote a column article about him and made him out the loont dangerous thing on legs. According' to my utory, he had killed a dozen ieople, smashed up the circus three or four timed and devastated a large area of farming country, ami 1 certainly worked up a great interest. "Among those who showed up ou cirens day. continued the agent, "was a gaunt, rawboned young farmer with a fist like a half bushel measure, lie had business lu bis eye. but no one noticed it until too late. He entered the animal tent with hundreds of others and made for the elephant at once. The old fellow was chained by the leg to a stake and munching away at a pile of hay. and the countryman squar ed off and gave him a good looking over. Then he asked of a keeer: "Is this the critter that has killed a dozen men?' 'It Is." was the reply, "and you'd better keep a safe distance. 'He smashes up circuses and devastates farms, does heV 'He does, and I think he's getting ready to break loose now. Just notice the twitch of his ears. If he does break loose, there'll be fifty people killed.' "Then I'll stop him right now." replied the young follow, and he Jumped In aud hit the Hajah a sockdologer on the ear that knocked him as flat as a pancake. They heard that blow clear out to the ticket wagon. and It took six men ami a two dollar bill to work that farmer outdoors without getting up a riot. As for the elephant, he lay there as If dead for a good half hour, and It was a week before be got over the headache and got bis appetite back. The papers gave me the grand guy about it. and 1 had to drop bini out of my ads. and claim that our Bengal tiger was the only real man eater ever exhibited In a tate of captivity." Ietroit Free Iress. A Rift Asa last Tine. "William." said the colonel, "do you ize mat you uuu i ne sui i wear off the first day - of January next?" "Yes. sir; I've been thinking 'bout It." "Well, how much la left down there?" "Ovtr half a barrel, sir." The colonel whistled a long, low vhistle. toole d out on the dreary landscape, pi. .led otT his coat, hung it on a convt::;-:n peg and said: "Bring me up a ton of coal, get me my slippers, have the daily newspapers sent to my room and tell everybody I'm not 'at home till after New Year's." Atlanta Constitution. Refleetlona of m BaeTaelor. Tife Is a joke just as long as you are the joker. The I.ord made good women to show ns bow different men are. Most men can stand success better than success can stand them. The way a man parts his hair has a great deal to do with whether a woman thinks be Is a genthjman or. not. Most women's idea of an interesting man Is one who will flatter them into Insensibility or that they wouldn't like ;to have their daughters know. New "York Press. Weary Uaggles Talk about yer disfrraeeful deaths! Iey'Te put me to I'work cuttln de woo dey're goin to cook tue widl Seribner's. Tk Other View. "It seems to me," said the lady, with a aeyere glance, "that the newspaper print some dreadful things." "Yea." answered the reporter, "it often makes me sad to think that people insist on doing shocking things and compelling us to write about them." Washington Star. ( Tnat Shaald Be Eiil. , i "You have stolen my ideas." asserted -the struggling young author. "True." admitted the successful plagiarist, "but the knowledge that yon have been of assistance to so great a man ought to satisfy your ambition." Chicago Tost. e Theory. How did Jenkins get that great tramp on his forehead?" "I don't know unless it was that his bead grew so fcig that it hit the roof." -Washington Times.

Hard.

PROGRESS IN FAR EAST

Filipinos Beginning to Learn to pc2.k English. USED EY KEWSB0Y3 13 MANILA. Some lateeatlaar Observations ty Fraak M. Klaslaa on the Iteaalt of Civil Servlee Kxamiaatioaa la the l'hilliipiaea RegalatioB of ttiuraari Priwtleate la the Srrvlrr. Frank M. Kiggins of the Philippine civil service board, who has returned !o Washington, speaks veiy interestingly of the condition of the service in the islands, says the New York Post. The merit system lias leen well established there, but. of course, is subject to the usual inequalities and crudenesses of such enterprises in their experimental stage. Both whites and natives have been admitted to public employment through the competitive examinations. The difference between the races apiears most plainly in the character of work each is naturally best fitted to do. The natives are clever at tasks which are essentially mechanical. Many of them are skilled penmen, for Instance, and in draftsmanship they excel, but In matters requiring sound discretion or technical knowledge they are deficient. Their work of any sort in which precision is of chief account has to be scrutinized with especial care. A pretty good evidence of the stage of clerical efficiency reached by the Filipinos is the record of the examinations up to aud Including May 31 of the present year. Of those natives who applied aoue passed the stenographer's or typewriter's examination, though there were five applications for the former aud fourteen for the latter. In bookkeeping there were twenty-seven applicants, but only one passed, and so on. In the examinations corresKudiug to the basis examinations in this couutry. practically nothing more than the "three ITs," G2 per cent of the applicants passed the lowest grade. 50 icr cent the middle and less than IS per cent the highest. AH the natives take their exaintna tions In Spanish, that language and English being the only ones used among the official class in the islands. The itative tongues alone are sjoken by a large majority of the natives, while the more intelligent and better educated know Spanish as welL Indeed, the ouly classes of natives who could be of any use in clerical places understand Spanish, and most of these are studying English also with great Industry. All official records and proceedings, of course, are in English, and our tongue IsLawading over the more tbieUIr . populated parts of the slaml-s ""with such rapidity that the coming generation. If the Philippines continue under control of the United States, will have a good practical command of it. Even the newsboys now cry their papers In the streets of Manila in English, and the natives generally seem to delight in practicing their linguistic accomplishments on any stranger wearing the appearance of an "Americano." albeit all they have learned to say may be "Good morning" or "How do you do?" The fears entertained in many quarters awhile ago that the language barrier would prove an irremediable menace to the happy relations of the raws seem therefore to have been groundless. The more ambitious natives, although taking their examinations in Spanish and often making a pretty bad fist of them, are williug to work hard to get ahead and attend dUigeutly the night schools established to prepare candidates for government employ. Thus far It has been impracticable to appoint even the best of them to clerical positions of responsibility. The lower places, however, which they are competent to fill, embrace. Including laborers, about fourfifths of the whole number. The pay and privileges in the civil service at large are graded according to the re spectlve Importance of the places. This Is what makes the natives appear to suffer so by competition with the whites; but the reason offered for this discrimination Is that the white clerk cannot live as the native does and must pay more for everything. Sometimes the difference seems harsh, especially when the drop from the white to the native salary is very sudden. Not long ago. for instonce, several ex-soliiers of the United States army were called upon to resign places worth $60 a month to make room for native employees at $12.50. To the native this was a pretty large salary, the figures under Spanish rule ranging from $6 upward. But they found It hard to understand why they should not have $00 a month like their white predecessors. Moreover, the discharged men could see no reason why they should give up their places to natives who could do the same work no better. It was fruitless, perhaps, in their state of mind, to try to make them appreciate the fact that the government's policy Is to nse Filipinos in all the civil branches for which they are competent. The principle which regulates the difference in salaries holds good also In the matter of vacations. Mr. Kiggins is of opinion that a white civil servant who takes care of himself has no necessary difficulty in living In the Philippines. He must adapt himself reasonably to his environment, and he will then get along. But it Is necessary for him to go away from time to time and refresh himself with a taste of life In another climate. The annual leave for the higher grades of the service is thirty-five days, and It is cumulative, so that any clerk who feels that this period will be too short foe

his full tvi-up ration may save up his va-atUiii- for two or three years and go to the l":;cd St.-nes for his recreation. The favorire vacation coupfries within easy reli are China anil Japan, lii the lower grades the vacatior have Irt-e'i ir.tiile shorter iKiause tfci liu lives v, Lil tl.s.'ot1 2iv ;ii th same climate in vr'.' :;. they have grown u. They need no change, ouly a respite frmii work. It is not expected that the present inequalit ies along race lines will continue indefinitely. When Filipinos Q'd most of the places, there will l no ground for it t rest upon. The civil service of the islands will then, moreover, be conducted at a minimum cost.

ROYAL CIRTHDAY SURPRISE. How K'.nis Edward Gave the Qneea an i uexpeeted Soosa. Concert. If a:iy further testimony to the splendid bertlth the king is rejoicing in were necessary, it was furnished by his appearance when he reached Loudon the other day. when he was looking the picture of good spirits and robustness and also by the amount of work aud shooting he had been doing recently. Mr. Sousa. America's march king. Is one w ho can testify to the king's excellent appearance, as also to that charming characteristic of his majesty's nature, a desire to give pleasure to others, says the New York Herald. The paius the king took to keep secret from the queen the birthday treat he had plan net for her in the coming of SouFa's band were almost boyish in their delightful enthusiasm. I believe not a living soul in Sandringham knew anything about the matter till about r.!i hour before the performance. Even then its nature was quite unknown to all. To guard against any chance of the king's secret becoming known, when the command was given a few days ago through Mr. Georjre Ashton instructions were that the whole affair was to be kept a profound secret, as the king was so solicitous about the surprise to be given to the queen. So jealously was the secret guarded that even the members of the band did not know where they were going, but simply that they were going to perform in a private house In the couutry. It was not till their train was starting from the Liverpool street station that they learned the truth, whereupon one huntsman exclaim! excitedly: "I was up till 4 o'clo' k this morning putting a crease In :ty trousers! If I had known. I wo:id cri.-j'nly have sat up till 0 to make U u.o"e complete." Circled Eyea. Dark circles uudei the eyes are often produced by an lnsiiiticiency of sleep. Icing. Icing may be whitened by the use of lemon juice, given a pink tint by using strawberry or cranberry juice or yellow by using the grated rind of an orange strained through a cloth. The First Directory. Philadelphia was the first city to Issue a directory, its first edition coming out in the year 17S.". Kentucky Roads. Kentucky was one of the early western states to take an active Interest in roadmaking. It was the policy of the state to co-operate with its minor political divisions in the construction of roads, and many years ago a corps of engineers set to work to lay off roads In all parts of the Blue Grass State. The Alps. The Alps cover a space of 90.000 square miles. In them rivers have their source fiowing into the North sea. Black sea and Mediterranean. Tools In the House. Expense, inconvenience and nervous Irritation can be saved by having in the house a few tools such as are used in doing what may be called "small jobs." provided their possession is accompanied by some knowledge of how to use them. I weakens the body and degrades the mind. It s?ps the nervous strength that is the source of all health, and perverts the functions of every organ. Because of its stubborn nature, it is often called incurable. This is not true. There is one medicine that never fails to check the nervous spasms and give new strength to the entire system. "Our babv boy had epileptic spasms and the physicians were enable to do anything to help him. We heard of Dr. Miles Nervine, and from the time he took the first dose he never had another attack, Mrs. J. Penner, 459 N. Meridian Ave, Anderson, lad. I Dr. Miles9 Nervine allays nervous irritation, stops spasms, restores digestion and mental vigor. Sold by druggists on guarantee. Dr. Miles Medical Co, Elkhart, lad.

etpsy

a heahhfal tuur food, re-stop-I ins youihtul color to fray n faded hair. K eroove tLuxiru tf and stop faUitic and brcaJucgof I not a dye and CsEAlTKli lU not discoior the scalp, hands or dothinr, and i itae caiiUut be I detected LARGE 50c. Jp ' liLfcS AT UKU. SHOre. RARFIJUSOAPri': 1 1M rtrmtf bjm ivkch. -a Mrs THE WRITERS. Marion Crawford says that novels are "pocket theaters." In the numUT of h!s contributions to this form or en tertainment he is easily the Shake speare of the day. In Toland the rewards of literature appear to be considerable. Henry Slen kiewlcz. the novelist, whose silver Ju bilee the Toles recently celebrated, was presented with a chateau and an estatou the' memorable occasion. Stephen Phillips, the poet. Is a Cam bridge university man. but never grad uated. He won a scholarship, but a' the desire of his cousin, Frank Benson the Shakespearean actor, be forsool the university for the stage against hi: family's wishes. Maxim tJorky. the Russian author, ia prophet not uuhonored at home. A planse for him recently .Interrupted t theatrical performance. Rising to hi feet, he shouted: "I am neither a balldancer uor a Venus de Milo! What ar you starinjr nt me for? Keep jour eye? on the stacej" Cures Rheumatism or Catarrh Through the Blood Costs Nothing to Try. Would you like to get rid of that chronic rheumatism or offensive catarrh forever? Then take a bottle of Botanic Blood Balm, which has cured thousands of hopeless cases that had resisted doctors and patent medicine treatment. Botanic Blood Balm (B. B B.) cures through the blood by destroying the poison which causes the awful aches in the bones, joints, shoulder blades and back, swollen glands, hawking, spitting, bad breath, impaired hearing, etc., making a perfect cure. Botanic Blood Balm thoroughly tested for 30 years. Composed of pure Botanic Drugs. Perfectly safe to take by old and young. Druggists. $1. Trial treatment free by writing Blood Balm Co., Atlanta,. Ga. Describe trouble and free med'eal advit given until cured. Don't give up hope, but tr B. B B., w hich make the blood jjiirt and rich and builds up the "all rui down," tirrd body. B B. B. makes he blood red, giying the skin tbi rich glow of perfect health. Bean the 118 hind too Ha8 km BaugM Signature of 'Little Colds" neglected thousands of lives sacrificed every year. De. Wood's Norway Pice Syrup cures little colds cures big colds too, down to the very verge of consumption. HOW ARE TOUR KIDNEYS 7 Dr. Hobbs' Sparagus pills cure all kidney ills. Sample free. Add. Stering Remedy Co All Wlio Use Atomizers in treating nasal catarrh will get the best result from Ely's Liquid Cream Balm. Price, including sj raying tube, 75cts. Sold by druggists or mailed by Ely Bros., 56 Warren St., N. Y. New Orleans, Sept. 1, 1900. Messrs. E'y Bros.: Isold two bottles of your Liquid Crentu Balm o a customer, Wm. Inmberton, 1415 Delachaise street, New Orleans; he has used the two bottles, giving him wonderful and most satisfactory results. Geo. W. McDcff, Pharmacist. Terrible plagues, these itching, pestering diseases of the skin. Put an end to misery. Doan's Ointment cures. At any drug store. O Bean the Signature of yy The Kind Toa Haw Mwats Bought Makes the fire of life burn with a steady glow. Renews the golden, happy days of youth. That's what Rocky Mountain tea does. 35 cents. Ask your druggist. Says lie Was Tortured. "1 suffered such pain from corns j could hardly wa'k," writes H. Robinson, Hillsborough, 111., "but Bucklens Arnica Salve completely cured them. " Acts like magic on sprains, bruises, cuts, sores, scalds, burns, boils, ulcers. Perfect healer of skin diseases a d piles. Cure guaranteed by A. G. Luken & Co , druggists. 25c. O Bern tlo SifsatTii .STOIIXA. rTia tad Ya H3B Jurats BcjgB Sundav Rates to all Points On the C. It. & 91. The C. R. & M. made a Sunday rate to all points on their line one fare for the round trip. Tickets good returning same day only. Sunday rates to Cincinnati fl.y5 for the round trip. Trains leave here 9:30 a. m. returning leave Cincinnati 7:30 p. m. arriving at Richmond 9:35 p. m. C. A. BLAia, City Ticket Agent. Phone 44.

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THINGS TO GIVE THE MEN FOLKS. Here they are. that is if the gifts ar t b nf th v '"fil" ort. Maybe abov all he'd prefer an t LHCOA1 orUll. Perhaps you could Dot please father, or: brother, or sou better hart to give him a gift of this sort. Overcoats or Suits here at $5 to $16. Lots" of prices in between. Then if He's Dot in the family, tut willirg to be, fcr Him a multitude of suggestions Smoking Jackets, Neckties. Collars. Suspc ndprs, Gloves, Mufflers, Shirts, Handkerchiefs, Umbrellas, Jewelry, Hats, Fancy Vest?, etc. Onr st.k is full of h-itma sugardtions of theus'lV sor. We au't tell about all. 0 m aud se thun, the best vraj . The GLOBE

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