Rensselaer Union, Volume 11, Number 35, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 15 May 1879 — MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS. [ARTICLE]

MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

—An arms house—the arsenal.— Boiton Transcript. '. —For causing death a prisoner may be sentenced for lifer —A man with a creaky pair of boot* has music in bia sole. —Dead men tell no tales, but dead walls are well posted. —A case of transformation—a wagon a stage. —N. Y. Mail. —Green turtles—those that allow themselves to be canght. —“ Look out for paint,” is one of the numerous signs of spring. —The man who married above his station was a railroad-conductor. • —Banking is conducted more loosely in Russia than in any other country. —The contemplative doctor strolls through the cemetery and sees his patients on a monument. —There is nothing mysterious about mosquitoes. It is easy to show how they mav-nip-you-late. —ln the twelve vears ending with 1878, Louisiana paid $9,361,095 as interest on its public debt. —Only one person in thirty-six is comfortable in England. Comfortable means having SBOO a year. —“The National Academy for the Higher Development of Pianoforte Playing” is a London institution. —A felt slipper is very comfortable for the fool; but a small boy does not look at it in that way.— N. 0. Picayune. —The Boston Post asserts that quantities of lively potato-bugs have been found under Panton (Vt.) snow-drifts eight feet deep. —The hard times in England are rellected in the Register-General’s returns. In 1873 there were 205,615 marriages; in 1878, 189,657. —Official reports s}iow that all classes of farm animals, throughout the country, came out of winter quarters in unusually good condition. —lmmigrants from the cotton manufacturing districts of England are beginning to arrive in Fall River. They tind the labor market there already greatly over-supplied. —There are 100,000 women in New York City who support themselves, 50,OCO of whom receive less than $3.50 a week. Many girls work in stores for $2 a week and board themselves. —The pedestrian who walks 600 miles in six days never travels faster than a boy does when he is dispatched to the cellar for a scuttle of coal while a circus-pageant is passing the house. —Prince Louis Napoleon received demonstrations of welcome whenever he appeared in public at Cape Town. The French Imperialists are believed to be awaiting with impatience his conquest of the Zulus. —A bright boy was walking along the street with his mother, and, observing a man with a peculiar hitch in his gait approaching, he drolly exclaimed: “Look there, mamma! See how that poor man stutters with his feet!” —A Delaware woman, a hard worker all her life, being about to die recently, called her husband and children. about her, and told them where she had buried $6,000.0f her earnings in the cellar. They dug .it up before the funeral. —A gang of pickpockets who were attending a fair at Bernay, France, recently, raised a cry of lire in a theater, and at the same moment turned the gas out. In the panic and confusion they plundered the audience and the box-office, and escaped under cover of the darkness.

—A voung woman who had never learned the gentle art of cookery, being desiroris of impressing her husband with knowledge and diligence, manages to have her kitchen door ajar on the day after their return from the bridal trip, and just as her lord comes in from the office exclaims loudly: “Hurry up, Eliza, do! Haven’t you washed the lettuce yetP Here, give it to me; where’s the soap?” —Hobart Pashak3he English Turk, is very fond of boasting of his success in running the blockade on the America)) coast during the civil war, and telling of the perils he encountered and the profitable cargoes of arms and ammunition that hfe carried into Southern ports, and how he ran out to sea between the Union blockades, loaded down with cotton bales. “Those were times,” he says, “for making money.” —One day, when George Washington was a small boy—this was shortly after his famous encounter with a cherry tree —he rushed into the honse, his eyes suffused with hot tears and his cheeks mantled in the roseate hue of conscious shame, crying out hysterically, “ Oi», pa, my dear pa! I have out — another—cherry lutp His father’s brow darkened, as he hiked, sternly, “Where is it? Show it me immediately.” George started out, followed by the old gentleman. To the garden the little fellow led the way, then down one path and up another, until almost out of breath, and entirely out of tamper, Mr. Washington declared he Would so no further, and demanded that he e told at once where the tree was. “ Why, pa,” said George, laughingly, “This is the first of April.” “ Run to my arms, my dearest boy,” cried his father, ip transport; “run to my arms. Glad am I, George, that you are not so entirely unlike other boys that yon can’t tell a lie on April Fool’s Day. Such a joke on this day is more worth than a thousand goody-goody stories, thongh printed on the finest of paper and bound in green an<j gold.” —Boston Transcript.

A ragged-looking pedestrian came to the back door of the Dunshudder mansion, and the hired girl shouted, “ We’ve nothin’for tramps.” “Fair lady, pause,” said the visitor; “I'm not a ndr beggar.” “What are ye, thenr’ “ Madam, I'm a solici-tor-general.”—.Utica Observer. The best thing in the world is to be able to live above the world.