Rensselaer Union, Volume 11, Number 30, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 10 April 1879 — How to Get a Dinner. [ARTICLE]

How to Get a Dinner.

A gentleman who had traveled about pretty extensively was greatly perplexed to understand how it was that other persons were waited upon promptly and well served at the hotels, while he was almost entirely ignored and could scarcely obtain a square meal —complain to or swear at the Waiter as be might. At last hisneyes were open to the dodge of feeing the waiter liberally, and being of an ingenious turn of mind he determined to..improve on the plan. | ’ The next hotel he dined at,he took his Seat very pompously at the table, and took out a well-tilled pocketbook, extracting therefrom a ten-dollar bill, which he had laid on the white cloth beside his plate, and placed his goblet upon It. In an instant almost ho was surrounded by Winters, who seemed to vie with each other in attentions. Every wish was anticipated, and all the delicacies of the kitchen and pantry were placed before him in tempting array. . Having fared as sumptuously as a Prinoe (to the envy »of many of the guests) he took up the greenback, and beckoning to the nearest waiter, was immediately besieged by half a dozen or so. Holding the bill in one hand, he pointed to it with the other, and inquired of the crowd: “Do you see that bill?” “Oh, yes, sir,” they itfPexclatmed in chorus. “ Then take a good look at it,**- he replied, “for you will never see it again.” Saying which he departed, leaving the waiters aghast. 1 "*►«»■ 3 | • By the latest returns there are in France 82.873 persons of unsound .mind, 42,986 of whom are in the Asy-