Rensselaer Union, Volume 9, Number 35, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 17 May 1877 — A. Batch of Whys. [ARTICLE]

A. Batch of Whys.

Why are Ambassadors tbe most perfect people in the world ? Because they are all excellencies. Why is sympathy like blind-man's buff! It I* a fellow feeling for a fellow-creature. Why is the sun like a good loaf ! Because it’s light when It rises. Why is a crow a brave bird T Because she never shows the white feather. Why is the “ Home Cook Book,” Chicago, acknowledged to bd »he most valuable and elegant extant ? Because the recipes all come from ladles of influence and good judgment, with permission to use name, and no lady would publicly endorse a recipe with her name unless it wss the very best she knew. —Therefore— Why is a sawyer like S lawyer! Because whichever way he goes, down comes the dust. Why are washerwomen silly people ! Because they put out their tubs to catch soft water when it rains hard. Why is a man who doesn’t lose his temper like a schoolmaster ? Because he keeps cool (keeps school). Why are mountains like invalids! Because they look peakish. Why are umbrellas like pancakes ? Because they are seldom seen after Lent. Why cannot two slender persons ever become great friends ! Because they will always be slight acquaintances.