Rensselaer Union, Volume 8, Number 18, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 20 January 1876 — An Essay on Fish. [ARTICLE]

An Essay on Fish.

Fish may be divided into- classes — codfish and fresh fish. The propriety of dividing them into classes will' be at opce apparent when we reflect' that they Are usually found in schools. The mackerel is not exactly a- eodlish'; but he comes so much nearer being a godfish than a>fresh fish that he- is for the present classed with the former. Fish exist in sizes to .suit the purchaser, from minnows to whalest-which are not fish, strictly speaking. Neither is the alligator a fish; but if we attempt to tell what are not fish this article, will far exceed its intended limits. 'The herring is not absolutely a fish; he is a suggestion of departed fish. But the strongest suggestions of departed fish ire smelt. The herring sustains' the same relation to the finny tribe as the Egyptian mummy to the human race. Fish are-caught by measure and sold by weight—that is, they are caught by the gill and sold by the pound. But tßey are some timescaught by weight—wait till you get a bite. Contentment is the chief respite to the successful fishermen; Surveyors are-apt tq be good fisherman, because their lines and angles are apt to be all right. The mermaid and fishwoman may also be mentioned in this connection. The former is a. good illustration of what-is meant by the ideal, and the latter as fitly represents the real. Many land animals are reprodhoed in the sea. Thus we have the dogfish, the catfish, sea-lions and sea-horses-;. but no sea-mules. None of the above have hind legs, and any manner of mule without hind legs would be a conspicuous failure. It may not be out of place to mention Jonah in this connection. He wa§ not a fish, but Was once included among the inhabitants of the deep. Jonah was the first man who retired from the Department of the Interior, and Delano was the last one. But we digress. Let us return- to our fish.

The saline qualities of the codfish permeate and percolate the vasty deep and make the ocean as salt as himself. Weighed in his own scales he Is-found wanting—wanting considerable freshening. He is by nature quite social, his principal recreation being bails—fishballs. The codfish was worshiped' by the Greeks; but he is only half as well'treated by tbe inhabitants of Gape Cod—beds simply shipped. Hence the difference between the Greeks and the inhabitants of Cape Cod. Small fish are usually harmless, but parents can’t be too careful about permitting their children to play where large fish abound, as it is an established fact that the big fish frequently' eat up their little ones. The jelly fish is perhaps the best understood of all the finny tribe, because, being translucent, it is easy to see-through him. The greatest number of fish is-eaten on Friday, and the next greatest number bn Saturday, because those that are left over are warmed up for Saturday’* breakfast. Argumentative persons are food of stating that it is grammatical to say that the five loaves and three fishes were ate, since five and three were always- eight. They should be treated with silent contempt. Fish are provided with air-bladders, so that they can rise from the depths of the sea by simply filling these bladders with air. If anyone is disposed to ask where they get the air for such inflation let him understand in advance that this article is not intended for the solution of petty conundrums. There are many interesting rumors about fish which might be mentioned, but the foregoing facts may be considered as of-tish-al. —Detroit Free Press.

The Liverpool Steam Packet Company, w ishing to extend, its premikes, decided to purchase adjoining land which was owned by a maiden lady of uncertain age. The lady sold the land cheap, but caused to be inserted in the agreement an article to this effect: that during her lifetime she and a lady companion should have the privilege of traveling free in any of the company’s vessels. The day after the agreement was signed the sold her house and furniture, and, having found a companion, went on board of one of the company’s steamers, just about to sail for South America, and from that time to this she has Jived at sea and at the company’s expense. She advertises for some lady who w ishes to make the voyage as her companion, and who pays her fare, and in this way, it is said, has already accumulated about SIO,OOO. The company have offered her more than tills to cancel the agreement, but this she refuses to do, and, as the life at sea suits her health remarkably, there is no present prospect that her voyage will soon come to an end.

—Meat lias been sent from Buenos Ayres to France in a perfect state of preservation in, a pickle composeJ of two purts of bi-tiorate of soda, two of boric acid, three of saltpeter and one of muriate of soda to 1(K) parts water. ♦ m. * ■■ —The Mexican border-ruffian, Gen. Cortina, has been released ftrom ajrrest at the City of Mexico, on his promise hot to be Cortina ’nother scrape.