Rensselaer Union, Volume 8, Number 10, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 November 1875 — BREVITIES. [ARTICLE]

BREVITIES.

A bEGULAR beat—The heart-beat; still, the heart is never a “ dead-beat ” It is not so much trouble for a man to get rich as it is to tell when he’s got rich. A stock man at Austin, Tex., is raising camels, and has sold a lot of young onesfor 1450 each. , One man in Colorado has a ranch 150 miles long and 26,000 head of cattle which cost only $7 apiece. After marriage a woman gets broader views and broader pronunciation. First it’s “coddle,” “then it’s “caudle.” If the names of the States were all of the same length an important source of political pleasure would be wanting. It would be impossible to construct “ pyramids." —Detroit Free Preen. The explosion of a kerosene lamp set fire to the house of T. Mack, in Toledo, Ohio. His little daughter in bed had her clothing set on fire, and before the flames could be extinguished was fatally burned. Sorghum mills and evaporators are in full blast all over the West, turning out hundreds and thousands of gallons of molasses. The crop of cane grown this year is larger than any* crop ever grown be--fore. The manufacture of plate glass in Missouri has been attended with such success since its commencement that that industry, though only some three years old, is now one of important of the State. * The Czar of Russia has just given a young Jew named Frelimann a commission in the Russian army. Frelimann is the first Jew who has ever attained the position of officer in the Russian military service. Some planters in the San Joaquin Valley, Cal., have been experimenting in cotton culture, and have raised from onequavter of a bale to four bales per acre, 500 pounds to the bale, on land that was not irrigated. • “ It’s a bunrng shame that he didn’t cut any kindling,” she muttered to herself .as she took up the kerosene can to start the fire, and “A burning shame” was what they chiseled on the tombstone which stood Over her cinders. It was a diplomatic huiband who protested to his wife: “ My dear, if it doesn’t make any difference to you, don’t say ‘ Brute!’ and ‘ Dolt!’ Use terms milder, if not less incisive. If I must have curtain lectures let them at least be damask curtain ones.” As far as we can learn from our exchanges, the manufacturers west of the Alleghenies are experiencing more of a revival of business than those further east. There are, however, many signs of a general movement. —Philadelphia Trade Journal. It is stated by the Bird Fanciers' Journal that a carrier bird which flies 150 miles an hour is under training for the purpose of forming a mail line between America and Europe, the whole distance to he traversed between sunrise in one hemisphere and sunset in the other. The Glasgow Times would appear to have figured out the thing pretty accurately when it remarks: V The man who is curious to see how the world cgujd get along without him can find out by sticking a cambric needle into a mill-pond, and then withdrawing it and looking at the hole.” The Waco Examiner of a recent date speaks in terms of severest criticism of the murders which have become so frequent throughout the State, and closes with a strong appeal to its readers and contemporaries to “ make Texas too hot to hold a man who wantonly takes the life of afellow-man.” The latest instructions published on the subject of “table etiquette” contain an admonition to “ see tjiat those about you are helped before you commence eating yourself.” The theory is probably that after you commence “ eating yourself ’ you will be unable to see that others are helped. —Detroit Tribune. From a single tree, planted in a tub and kept in his hot-house, C. S. Holbrook, of Holbrook, Mass., sold, in eighteen years, no less than $2,300 worth of peaches—some of them at $36 per dozen, many at from $24 to S2B per dozen, and all at an average of $lB pef dozen. They were sold mostly in the months of February and March. Mr. Delano, the editor of the London Times , began his editorial career thirtysix years ago. He served for the first two years as assistant editor, after that as ed-itor-in-chief. He was only twenty/two years of age when he first obtained employment on the Times. His health has now broken down for the third time, and •>he is taking a vacation. “ Weak, unconscious criminality,” is what the New York Prison Inspector specifies as the cause of Frank Walworth’s parricidal act. This is quite as good as emotional insanity, provided the “weak, unconscious criminals” are so restrained of their liberty that the rest of the community shall not suffer from their weakness or unconsciousness. —Detroit Free Press. England washes most of the manure made by her people into the ocean, and then hunts over the globe from Egypt to Peru for more to waste. The United States does no better. But the natives of Japan and China maintain the fertility of their soil by saving what those who pretend to be civilized throw away. They have no worn-out, abandoned fields.— Christian Union. Here is a warning for men too mean to advertise: One of this description wanted to sell some land, and so he put a written notice in one of the hotels the other day. A man who was inquiring for a small farm was referred to the written notice, when he replied: “ I can’t buy land at a fair price of any man who does his advertising in this way. He’d steal the fence, the pump-handle, and the barn-doors before he’d give up possession.” V > A youth was rushing around the corner, saying: “ All I want in this world is to lay my hands on him!” He presently came upon a boy weighing about ten pounds more than himself, and rushing at him he exclaimed: “ Did you lick my brother Ben?” “Yes, I did,” said the boy, dropping his bundle and spitting on his hands. “ Well,” continued the other lad, backing slowly away, “he needs a lickin’once a week to teach him to be civil !”- A family living on Cass avenue found a good thickness of cream on some milk that had been standing over night- and when the milkman made his usual call the pleased housewife exhibited the cream and skid: “I neverexpected to see this.” The man looked at the cream, winked wisely and solemnly, scratched his head and replied: “ Well, I don’t know what ails, it, but you can throw it out and I’ll give you a fresh pint in its place!"—Detroit Free Press. The other day a Vicksburg negro was drawing a big dog around the street by a strap, and a citizen inquired: “Is that

your dog?” '“Yes, sah.” “Do you want to sell him?” “Yes, sah, I want to sell my sheer ob him.” “ Your share ? How’s that?” “Why, dis dog am divided into eighteen sheers. De sheer-holders am a little down in the mouf on ’count ob de hard times, an’ Ize depumtized to sell the kaynine for the sum ob two dollars.”— Vicksburg Herald. Phil. Sheridan imbibed, in his trip to the West, some far Western ideas, which begin to show themselves. They told him on the Western slope that there was no team so good as a span of mules, and since his return to Chicago he has purchased and drives in one slashing team four big - black mules. His wife went with himone day, and was so mortified at one ol them yee-liawing on the street that she has ever since refused to ride, —Detroit Free Press.

Nine men have handed in their names as members of a company for the thorough exploration of the Black River caves, at Watertown, N. Y. It is thought to be desirable that there should be about twice this number, or more. One of the caves was explored at one time to a distance of nearly two miles, and no limit This cave extends under the river, and the noise of the faljs above can be heard in it, and in places it is beautiful with' stalactites. Ex-Marshal Bazaine is charged' with having hesitated at nothing that would bring him money when in command of the French army of invasion in Mexico iu 1864-5. He is alleged to have kept in the name of others two storey in the City of -Mexico—one a grocer’s and the other a dry-goods shop—in which French stuffs were sold at high prices and at immense profits, as he found means to avoid paying freight or import duties. In this way he is said to have amassed a large fortune. Dr. Winter states, in his essay on “ Brain Enigmas,” that a little girl of six years fell and received a severe concussion of the brain, while engaged in a game of toss-and-catch with a young companion. For ten hours she remained insensible. At the end of that period she opened her eyes, and, instantly springing to the head of the bed, began throwing about the small articles at hand, exclaiming: “ Catch these!” From that moment she was perfectly sane. To Bake Beans.—Soak one quart of beans over night in warm water; set them on the stove in the morning and let them come to a boil; drain the water all off and fill up again with hot water 1 *; set them on The stove again and let them cofilUslowly until they commence to be soft; throWtke water all off, put the beans in a cl grp pan or “ Yankee bean-pot” with a small piece of salt fat pork; fill up with hot waiter, three tablespoonfuls of molasses, and a piece of soda the size of a bean; bake four or five hours and keep them filled with water. Ljubibratich is said, by a Herzegovinian correspondent to seem to be a man singularly fitted by nature to fill the-posi-tion of liberator, and excites the same attachment in his followers as Garibaldi, whom he is said to resemble in manner. He is handsome, pensive, with a winning smile and manner of address; and has dark brown eyes, whose ordinary expression is dreamy and womanlike, but with a glint and flash quite startling when excited, and in the set, strong mouth there is indomitable resolution. The Williams & Guion Steamship Company undertook to make-the quickest time on record in crossing the Atlantic with, the Dakota. It left Liverpool Sept. 30, in the face of. a heavy wind, and was run at its highest rate of speed. When about 300 miles out of Queenstown the iron plates in front of the anchor-deck were beaten in, the forward hold soon filled and a panic seized both crew and passengers, who. united in begging the Captain to put ■He refused, the crew mutinied, when he was forced to return to Queenstown. The New Style of ScnooL, by Prof. AV. P. Jones, Evanston, 111., where common-school, business and early college studies are taught in Hie individual method instead of in classes, receives the approval of business men and the best teachers. Nextjerm opens Dec. 6. Tiie rudeness of Dr. Parr to ladies was sometimes extreme. To a lady who had ventured to oppose him with more warmth of temper than cogency of reasoning, and who afterward apologized for herself by saying that it was the privilege of women to talk nonsense, “ No, madam,” he replied, “it is not their privilege, but their infirmity; ducks would walk if they could; but nature suffers them only to waddle!”