Rensselaer Union, Volume 8, Number 10, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 November 1875 — The Bridal Tower. [ARTICLE]

The Bridal Tower.

There were three of them. One was a bride, the other a happy groom with red ears and maiden whiskers, and the third was the bride’s mother. - They were at the Grank Trunk depot yesterday to take the train West. The young man clasped his young wife’s fat hand, rolled up his eyes, and they seemed happy, while the mofher-ip-law paraded up and down the sittingroom with lordly air and seemed well satisfied. Pretty soon the- groom went out, and when he returribd lie threw five popcorn balls and a big baidbf peanut-c<tfidy into the bride’s lap and handed the old lady another. She turned up her nose, raised her spectacles, and thus addressed the young man with red ears: “ See here, Peter White, you arc married to Sabintha, ain’t you?” ■ “ Why, of couyse.” - “ And I have a right to feel an interest in you?” “Of course?” “And we are now on your bridal tower, ain’t we ?” “Y T es.” “ Well, new, you’ve been squandering money all along, Peter, l'outook a hack; you bought oysters; you bought a jackknife, and you’ve just thrown money away. I feel that it is my duty to tell you to hold up before you make a fool of yourself!” “"Whose money is this?” he asked, growing very red ‘in the face. “It is yours, and what is yours is Sabifitha’s, and it is my duty as her mother to speak out when I see you fooling your money away.” “ I guess I can take care of my money!” he retorted. “ Perhaps you can, Peter White, but there are those in your family who can’t!” He struggled with his feelings, as the bride shook her head at him. and then asked: “ Did I marry you?” “ No, sir, you didn’t, you little, bowlegged apology for a man; but I have a right to speak for my daughter.” * •’ Y'ouoan speak all you want to; but I want you to understand that I can manage my own affairs, and that. I don’t care for your advice.” “ Peter White!” she slowly responded, waving the peanut-candy close to his nose, “ I see we’ve got to have a fuss, and we might as well have it now!” “ Ma! ma!” whispered the brides pulling at the old lady’s shawl. “ You needn’t ma me, Sabintha! This Peter White has deceived us both about liis temper, and I’m going to tell him just what I think of him! He commenced this fuss, and we’ll see who’ll end it!” “ You mind your business and I’ll attend to mine!” growled Peter. “Oh! you hump-backed hypocrite!” she hissed, jabbing at liis eye‘ with the peanut-bar. “Only a month agfr you called me ‘ Mother Hull,’ and was going to give me the best room in the new house!” “ You’ll never have a room in a ltouseof mine!” lie exclaimed. “ And I don’t want one, you red-eared hypocrite!” 11 “ Don’tpPeter—don’t, ma!” sobbed the bride. “It’s my duty, Sabintha; it’s your mother’s ” “Don’t cry, Sabby,” he interrupted; “ don’t mind what she says!" “ Try to set my daughter up agin me, will you?” hissed the old lady, as she brought the peanut-bar down on his nose. “ O ma!” yelled the bride. “ You old wretch!” hissed Peter, as he clawed at her. “ None of the Whites will ever run over me!” exclaimed the mother-in-law as she got hold of his shirt-collar and battled him around.

“ I’ll knoek your old ”, “ You can’t knock nothing!" she interrupted, backing him against the table. “Ma! 01i!-h-li! ma!” howled Sabintha. The dozen other passengers in the room who had been interested and amused listeners here interrupted, and Peter was released from the old lady’s grasp, his collar having been torn off and liis cheek scratched. “I expected this and prepared for it!” panted the mother-in-law, as she leaned against the wall. “This doesn’t end it, by any means! This bridal tower will come to a stop to-morrow, and then we’ll see whether I’ve got any business to speak up for Sabintha or not!”' As the train moved away the old lady wore a grim smile, Sabintha was weeping and Peter was struggling with another paper-collar. —Detroit Free Press.