Rensselaer Union, Volume 7, Number 46, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 5 August 1875 — Stephen’s Plan For Paying His Debts. [ARTICLE]

Stephen’s Plan For Paying His Debts.

In the absence of further statistics I beg to close this series of Old Mississippi articles with one more reminiscence of wayward, careless, ingenious “ Stephen,” whom I described in a*former paper. Most of the Captains and pilots held Stephen’s note for borrowed sums ranging froms2so upward. Stephen never paid one 6f these notes, but he was very prompt and very zealous about renewing them every twelve months. Of course there came a time, at last, when Stephen could no longer borrow of his ancient creditors; so he was obliged to lie in wait for new men who did not know him. Such a victim was goodhearted, simple-natured young Yates (I use a fictitious name, hut the real name began, as this one does, with a Y). Young Yates graduated as a pilot, got a berth, and when the month was ended and he stepped up to the clerk’s office and received his $250 in crisp new bills Stephen wait there! His silvery tongue began to wag, and in a very little while Yates’ $250 had changed hands. The faot was soon known at pilot headquarters, and the amusement and satisfaction of the old creditors were large and generous. But innocent Yates never suspected that Stephen’s promise to pay promptly at the end of the week was a worthless one. Yates called for his money at the stipulated time; Stephen sweetened him and put him off a week. He called then, according to agreement, and came away sugar-coated again, but suffering under another postponement So the thing went on. Yates haunted Stephen week after week to no purpose, and at last gave it up. And then straightway Stephen began to haunt Yates! Wherever Yates appeared there was the inevitable Stephen. Ana not only there, hut beaming with affection ana gushing with apologies for not being able

to pay. By and by whenever pdor Yatee saw him coming ne would turn and fly and dreg his company with him, if he had company; but it was of no use; his debtor would run him down and comer him. Panting and red-faced, Stephen would come with outstretched hands and eager eyes, invade the conversation, shake both of Yates’ arms loose in their sockets, and begin: . ■ • \!>r. ■ “ My, what a race I’ve had! I saw you didn’t see me, and so I clapped on all steam for fear I’d miss you entirely. And here yon are! There, just stand so and let me look at you. Just the same old, noble countenance.” To Yatee’friend: “Just look at him! Look at him! Ain’t it just good to look at him! Ain't it, now? Ain’t he just a picture? Some call him a picture; I call him a panorama! That’s what he is—an entire panorama! And now lam reminded! How Ido wish I could have seen you an hour earlier! For twenty-four hours I’ve been saving up that $250 for you; been looking for you everywhere. I waited at the Planter's from six yesterday evening till two o’clock this morning, without rest or food; my wife says: ‘ Where have you been all night ?’ I said : ‘ This debt lies heavy on my mind.’ She says: ‘ln all my days I never saw a man take a debt to heart the way you do.’ I said ? ‘ It’s my nature; how can I change it?’ She says: ‘Well, do go to bed and get some rest.’ I said: ‘ noble young man has got his money.’ So I set up all night, and this morning out I shot, and the first man I met told me you had shipped on the Grand Turk and gone to New Orleans. Well, sir, Thad to lean up against a building and cry. So help me goodness, I couldn’t help it. The man that owned the place came out cleaning up with a rag, and said he didn’t like to have people cry against his building, and then it seemed to me that the whole world had turned against me, and it wasn’t any use to live any more; and coming along an hour ago, suffering no man knows what agony, I met Jim Wilson and pud him the $250 on account; and to think that here you are now and I haven’t got a cent! But as sure as lam standing here on this ground, on this particular brick —there, 1 have scratched a mark on the brick to remember it by—l’ll borrow that money and pay it over to you at twelve o’clock sharp to-morrow! Now, stand so; let me look at you just once more.” And so on. Yates’ life became a burden to him. He could not escape his debtor and his debtor’s awful sufferings on account of not being able to pay. lie dreaded to show himself in the street lest fie should find Stephen lying in wait for him at tlie corner. Bogart’s billiard saloon was a great resort for pilots in those days. They met there about as much to exchange river news as to play. One morning Yates was there; Stephen was there too, but kept out of sight. But by and by, when about ali the pilots had arrived who were in town, Stephen suddenly-appeared in the midst and rushed for Yates as for a longost brother. “ Oh, lam so glad to see you! Oh, my soul, the sight of you is such a comfort to mvjevea! Gentlemen. T owe all of you money; among you I owe probably forty thousand dollars; I want to pay it; I intend to pay it—every last cent of it. You all know without my telling you what sorrow it has cost me to remain so long under such deep obligations to such patient and generous friends; but the sharpest pang I suffer—by far the sharpest—is frQin the debt I owe to this noble young man here; and I have come to this place this morning especially to make the announcement that I have at last found a method whereby I can pay off all my debts! And most especially I wanted him to be here when I announced it. Yes, my faithful friend—my benefactor, I’ve found the method! I’ve found the method to pay off aU my debts and you’ll get your money!” Hope dawopd in Y T ates’ eye; then Stephen, beaming benignantly and placing his hand upon Yates’ head, added; “ I am going to pay them off in alphabetical order!” Then he turned and disappeared. The full significance of Stephen’s “method” did not dawn upon tfte perplexed and musing crowd for some two minutes; and then Y ates murmured with a sigh: “Well, the Y T ’s stand a gaudy chance. He won’t get any further than the C’s in this world, and I reckon that after a good deal of eternity has wasted away in the next one I’ll still be referred to up there as ‘ that poor, ragged pilot that came here from St. Louis in the early days’!”— Mark Twain, in August Atlantic.