Rensselaer Union, Volume 7, Number 10, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 26 November 1874 — Page 7

BREVITIES.

Ax unsatisfactory meal— A domestic broil. Sometimes coal does not burn as well of an evening, because it’s slate. The habit of keeping still under provocation at length makes one almost tireproof. . -* j Bashfulness is often like the plating on spoons —when it wears ofl? it shows the brass. The plainest woman alive, if she reaches the age of eighty, will be a pretty old one. Cincinnati claims to have the best hotel cook in the world. He gets up frog suppers out of mutton. If brooks are, as poets call them, the most joyous things in nature, what are they always murmuring about? ifoDEL wives formerly took a stitch in time; now, with the aid of sewing machines, they take one in no time. Those Detroit ladies who bleached their hair to a blonde are bleaching it back again. Fashion is a fickle jade. It is economy to purchase the best black silk. The cheap materials are never worth retaining a second season. The labor of the body relieves us from the fatigues of the mind, and this it is which forms the happiness of the poor. A house in St. Joseph, Mo., is haunted by a ghost, which appears to tenants who don’t pay up promptly, but never to those who do. Some of the students at Eastern colleges can board themselves for thirtyfive cents per week, but they don’t feel like tearing around much. Louisville wants an ordinance to prevent her citizens from throwing quids of tobacco in the street. One quid will ofteqjimes blockade a street. A San Francisco policeman who was living at the rate of SIO,OOO a year was found to be in receipt of $75 a day for winking at Chinese gambling. The man wdio has not had anything to boast of but his illustrious ancestors is like a potato plant—the only good be-, longing to him is under ground. “ Do you get whipped at school now?” asked a mother of a young hopeful who had recently changed his place of instruction. “ No, mother, I have a better teacher and I’m a better boy.” Dresses are made to fit the figure “like a glove,” and the great majority of New York fashionable women have discarded corsets in order to bring about the “ eternal fitness of things!” A lamp-chimney may be made almost indestructible by putting it over the fire in a vessel of cold water and letting it remain until the water boils. It will be found that boiling toughens in this case. Recreation is not idleness. It is absolutely necessary at times that a man should get out of the routine grooves of w r ork, that lie may grow mentally and physically and become nearer perfection. Lancaster County, Pa., has an old lady w j ho recently*refused the gift of a load of wood from a tree struck by lightning, through fear that some of the “fluid” might remain in the wood and cause disaster to her stove. A Brooklyn woman sues her husband for divorce, one of his. trifling offenses being the entering of the room in w r hich she was sleeping with a lighted Candle in his hand which he held in , a position so that a drop, of melted tallow r fell into : her eye’! An extraordinary large turnip was dug in a garden at Salt Lake the other day, which, on being cut open, disclosed a large-sized frog, well and hearty, which tumbled out and hopped off just as if he was not the creature of a wonderful phenomenon. There’s nothing like adjectives. In Philadelphia the “ crisp chestnut is crowding the popular peanut out *of the market.” Here, the pulpy but presently putrid paw-paw is giving w r ay to the pungent and pleasantly puckery persimmon. — St. Louis Journal. A calculating machine on two legs,

and with a black skin, who can mentally add, subtract and multiply large numbers, is a Memphis curiosity. The negro cannot explain how he does it, neither can he perform the operations with a pen. Third Assistant Postmastek-Gen. Bajuikk, who has given the subject much -attention, expresses the belief that the Government is annually defrauded out of $1,000,000, or 5 per cent, of the amount of stamps sold, by the use of washed postal stamps. As a river boat was loading at a landing on the Mississippi River a large gray mule refused to go on board. The mate sung out to a deck-hand: “ Twist his • tail and he’ll come.” Like Casabianca, that deck-hand obeyed orders, and, like Casabianca, lie nobly died. A farmer in Oregon has had a field of sixty acres of grain eaten by rabbits, and all of his other fields have suffered, although to a less extent, from their depredations. Hundreds are shot every day, but hundreds more come out from the sage brush and take their places. A pretended clergyman swindled the Norwich line of boats by getting a commission of S3OO on a contract for transporting 600 members of the Episcopal Convention from New York to Boston, and then tried the same unsuccessfully upon the Btonington line. He is still at large. <? Tiie Superior Court, Portland, Me., recently ruled that -.they right to recover for a sum, due on account for a load of coal depended upon observance of the statute, which provides that unless otherwise agreed the coal shall be weighed by a sworn weigher, if it is not sold by the cargo. Game in Colorado is abundant. Buffalo, elk and antelope roam over the plains to the eastward, while bears, both of the cinnamon and grizzly, species, mountain sheep, and black-tail deer reward me mountain hunter; many of thd smaller*streams are well stocked with fish. White snipe, geese, duck and plover are numerous. Fuss kills more than fever. The paupers of the New York alms-houses, though entering at an advanced, age, average twenty years of easy life thereafter. All from being free from worry, fret, trouble, anxiety, disappointment and botheration generally. Such obstinacy on the part of poor-house inmates is very provoking to the tax-payers. An exchange gets off the following on delinquent subscribers: “ Looking over an old ledger we see a long array of names of former subscribers who are indebted to us. Some of them have mdved away and are lost to sight although to memory dear. Others are carrying the contribution-boxes in our most respectable churches, and others again have died and are ahgels in heaven; but they ow *» us just the same.

Something Better , than ShortCakeL— -Make nice, light, white gems by mixing flour and milk nearly as soft as for griddle-cakes, and baking quickly in hot gem-pans. Break, not cut, them open and lay in a deep platter and pour over strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, peaches (or even nice stewed apples), mixed with sugar and a little rich cream if you have it. Ten times better than any pastry or short-cake, and you get rid of soda or baking powder and shortening. —Laws of Life. In going out with the crowd at the close of a performance in the theater in Wheeling, W. Va., recently, Mr. John Dunlap, a book-keeper at the Register office, was jostled about by a gentleman with whom he was unacquainted. Mr. Dunlap carried . his overcoat upon his left arm and it was against this arm that the stranger had been pushed by the crowd. As they passed out John noticed that the watch-chain of the strange gentleman was broken and hung from his vest. Upon arriving home he hung his overcoat up and had no occasion to use it again until two days afterward. Then, upon taking it down, he was astonished to find hanging from a button a silver w r atcli to which a broken chain was ah tached. He remembered the incident at the theater, advertised the fact and the | owner recovered his property. j Secretary Bristow' lias officially decided that jourßalism is a profession, under the following circumstances: An American journalist, who was returning from Europe, bringing with him a considerable quantity of books for his own library, held that the books were entitled to be entered duty free under that section of the customs laws which makes provision for the free importation of books for the use of a library of a physician, a lawyer and a clergyman. The Custom-House officers at Baltimore, where the books were entered, decided that journalism is not a profession and that the books must pay duty. An appeal was taken to the Secretary of the Treasury, who has reversed their decision. This is the way they are to be manufactured for us, and then w T e can all wear them except the bon ton , w f ho w r ill then discard them for something that costs hiore monej’: Benzine is introduced into a glass shell about six inches in thickness and capable of standing enormous pressure. Another substance, having a strong affinity for hydrogen, but the name of which is kept secret, is introduced with it. The poles of a moderately strong battery are also introduced and the whole hermetically sealed. As decomposition takes place slowdy the hydrogen unites with the substance for which it has an affinity, and pure, colorless carbon is set free and in course of time forms in various sizes on the interior side of the glass shell. And what is formed, gentle reader, by this simple process is the sparkling diamond or pure carbon. At least the papers tell us that some genius claims that he can make them by this process. A short, time since a young lady, a resident of this place, experienced a creeping sensation in her nose after, she had retired for the night and all efforts to remove the annoyance were without the desired effect, the difficulty remaining for several days, merely changing to a location farther up in the nostril. At length it, seemed to pass down infq the throat, causing a choking sensation, and finally disappeared. Immediately after its disappearance the victim experienced acute pains in the stomach and called medical assistance in vain, the only thing that gave relief being copious doses of brandy, which failed to produce any of the usual effects. Finally severe vomiting ensued, and after one whole night’s suffering and the patient giving up hopes of life the cause of the trouble was removed and an examination found it to be a small particle of blood and matter, in the center of which was a commonsized black spider; Evidently the brandy saved the young lady’s life.—lndianapolis Journal. Yesterday morning, about eight o’clock, a little two-year-old child of Mr. Webb Calhoun, living two and a half miles north of the city, fell into a cistern, and the mother, who happened to seotho child fall, jumped in after it. Mr. Calhoun, who is dealing in stbek, was away from home at the time of the accident, and there w r as no one on the place, and Mrs. Calhoun, being unable to get out, was compelled to stand in the water waist deep from eight o'clock in morning until five in the evening. The unfortunate w'oman probably would have had to spend the night in that distressing condition, where, no doubt, she and her child would have perished be fore morning, if, by her screams, she had not attracted the attention of some children who were returning from school. The school children heard her cries for help, but it was some time before they discovered and rescued the almost exhausted lady. Indeed, shewvas so much chilled and fatigned that it will be fortunate if she escapes a severe- illness. Dr. Sibly was sent for about seven o’clock last evening, and it is to be hoped the lady will escape serious consequences from her Jong bath. —Decatur Magnet.

Saw Tecth.

Don’t quarrel with enny man’s religion; ytrEant prove tliet yure own iz right. If I hav.got to lift a log I want to take lioit ov it lust az I hgv a mind to, not az enny body else sez iNomankan du away with hiz pasliuns; they were given us,- not to eradikate, but to control. Philosophy teaches a man how to bear with grate composure the trials ov others, but often fails in a combat with hiz own. Good luk lias ruined more men than bad luk ever liaz. The most degrading punishment that haz been diskovered yet iz the toe of a tliik boot. If yu kan call a man a liar with truth, yu kan add to it almost ennyother krime with impunity. Never go to enny one for advice un'il yu hav fully made’ up your mind what yu are going to do. It aint so mutch what men kant do that makes them fall short of suckcess az it iz what they wont do^ Aim hi, yung man; the same charge of powder will carry the bell match farther if the gun is elevated than it will if it is depressed. « . « Menny a man haz cast the lead to find the depths ov misery, but>git down az low as yu kan, yu will find others belo JUHe who allwuss watches the suckcess ov others and then hurries to drop hiz hook into, the same hole seldom bags much fish. 1 It iz time. enuff to feuffer martyrdom when yu - kant dodge it : but t hare iz plenty uv folks who are allwuss hunting for it, and who dont feel virtewous nor

1 1 1 , 1 " happy unless they are bleeding at some ov their pores. He whom good luk nor bad luk haz no effekt upon iz more than haff a hero. Energy and good luk are twins-, but energy waz bom fust. I hav seen people so nicely balanced in their constitutions that they waz perfektly happy, and didn’t kno it. True luv kant be successfully counterfited, and it iz really one uv* the skarsest qualities uv the human harte. Silence iz safe; for tho yu may be a phool, nobody kan prove it. Phools are allwussthe fust ones to proclaim it. _ Thare are no ones who git so tired and disgusted with themselfs as the lazy do. Fame that yu kant make vure brefi and butter out ov iz a kussid* poor investment. * I hav studied sumtime onto it and kant tell yet whether the most blunders we mak cumsfrom the hed or the harte. Man’s best friend and wust enemy haz alwuss been himself. Those people who fish for others are the most apt to be kaught themselfs.— Josh Billings , in N. Y. Weekly.

Hats.

As a part of a woman’s garb the new hats are unique. Their prototypes have existed among men’s head coverings for several seasons, but nothing quite so eccentric has been seen for women’s use for many a day. The modish hats are of all shades of felt; have high crowns (like the quondam Alpine hat, without its dent) and rather wide brims. It is in the brims alone that one can be individual. They are turned up before, behind, on the sides, at the corners—wherever fancy prompts, in short. Velvet and repped silk, of shades contrasting with the felt, with short feathers of all kinds—ostrich, heron, cock, duck, peacock, partridge, robin and every other variety of wing—form the principal portion of the trimming. Inevitably, there is an abundance of jet interspersed, in the form of buckles, pins, sprays and fringes, while blue steel holds its own. But, as jet and steel are not happily adapted to. every color, there is now and then a surcease of them. The brims of these hats are not wired; consequently they are so softly flexible that, while they are turned up on one side, they can be turned down upon the other, producing a singularly “rakish” effect. These hats have in fact too great a tendency in this direction, and require unusual taste and discretion in their use. The usual garniture is a binding of velvet, wide or narrow, as preferred, piped with repped silk; finger wide band, also of velvet, round the crown; a, bunch of loops of the combined silk and velvet securing the brim against the crown—these, in turn, surmounted by such feathers as may be used, and the flowers and leaves, if any are employed, tucked in with the rest, forming a general conglomerate. Flowers are rather less in favor than usual just now, though it may be_only because everybody is wearing felt; and felt and flowers are naturally incongruous. Such flow r ers as are 1 worn, however, are mainly of a deep rich red — a color, by the bye, especially fashionable this season. Bonnets do not differ essentially from: those of last year, except in being rather larger"- They have the same irregular shapes and superfluous decoration as before, but are chiefly of darker tints; even reception and opera hats being black or nearly so, picked out with white or some very pale contrasting hue. — “ Home and Society ,” in Scribner's for December.

Planos and Organs.

Fine new rosewood pianos for S3OO. Fine walnut organs, six stops, $125. Good second-hand pianos, $l5O to S2OO. Reed’s Temple of Music, Chicago. A Maine man says that a pumpkin in that State grew so large that eight men could stand around it; which statement Was only equaled by that of a Hoosier who saw a flock of pigeons fly so low that lie could shake a stick at them. W hisky AMp the Weed. —lntelligent physiologists and pathologists admit that all so-called medicines containing alcohol —whether they emanate from the regular pharmacopoeia and are called tinctures , or from the Empirical Rum Mills, and are labeled , “ Tonics”—are essentially dangerous and destructive. The only way in which drunkenness can be arrested is by restoring the integrity of thcTip.rvos (especially the nerves of taste and the great sympathetic nerve), and 'purifying the animal fluids; and these objects are more certainly and swiftly accomplished by the use of Dr. Walker’s Vinegar Bitters than by any other means. Hence, probably, the opinions now so generally expressed, that this pure preparation is a sovereign remedy for the etils referred to. Shomd it be clearly ascertained that Vinegar Bitters is not only a specific for indigestion, liver disease, nervousness, scrofulous ulcers and eruptions, and a host of other disorders, but also for inebriety, will rise up and call the discoverer blessed. Id If you have been wearing paper collars and have not yet tried the Elmwood, we would advise you to do so at once. They tit splendidly. All the edges arc folded, so they will not Wrn out, and the collars will not soil as Easily as others. The Northwestern Horse-Nail Co’s “Finished” Nail is the best in the world.

The Prettiest Woman in Not York, Mias K —, wel known in our fashionable society for her dittingue appearance and beautiful complexion, was once a sallow, rough-skinned girl, chagrined at her red, freckled face. She pitched into Hagan's Magnolia Balm, and ie now as pretty in complexion as she is charming in manners. This article overcomes freckles, tan, sallowness, moth-patches, ring-marks, etc., and makes one look ten years younger than they are. Magnolia Balm for atransparent complexion, and Lyon's Kathairon to make the hair plentiful, luxuriant, soft and delicate, have no rivals. The Kathairon prevents the hair from turning gray, eradicates dandruff, and is the best and cheapest dressing In the world. Damned by Paint Praise.— Jas. Beekman, clergyman, of New York, was recently badly kicked by a horse, and was speedily cured by using the celebrated Mexican Mustang Liniment When the proprietor asked him for a certificate be replied that he “considered it a remarkable article, but It wouldn’t answer for him to indorse a remedy In print.” Here’s consistency. But we didn’t kick him. ns the horse' did. The worldknows that for Rheumatism, Bruises, Swellings, Spavin, Scratches, Intlammation, Lameness, or anyflesh, bone 6r muscle aliment upon man or animal, there Is nothing like the Mustang Liniment.' It costs but 50 cts, and tl.Ou per bottle, and should be In evbry family. It Is wrapped In a fine steei-plata label, and signed " G. W. Westbrook, Chemist." Tonic and Recuperant Plantation Bitters.—The constantly-increasing patronage which It receives has. It Is true, excited the petty envy of certain splenetic advertisers of pinchbeck panaceas, who hope to make a market for their own stagnant, watery wares by decrying all spirituous medicinal preparations. But the public can stomach neither their arguments nor their potations,and consequently reject these Tsrf weak imitations of the enemy ss entirely too thin. SKHDrTour name end address to Ur. R. Blacks!!, 61 Washington street, Chicago, and receive his bulletin and Catalogue.of new books free,*

Safe, Permanent and Complete!—Wll- - Tonic cures Chills and Fever, Dumb Chllls*and Bilious Fevers—those Titans that kill their thousands where this remedy is unknown. It cures Enlargement of the Spleen. It cures Hypertrophy of the Liver. It hurts no one. It cures all types of Malarial Fevers and is perfectly protective in all its effects. Try IVilhoft’s Tonic, the great infallible Chill Cure. Wheelock, Finlat & Co., Proprietors, New Orleans: For Sale by all Druggists. Every reader of this paper can receive, free, a copy of the best Agricultural and Family newspaper in this country by addressing Moore’s Rural New-Yorker, 78 Duane street, New^York. Frank Wentworth is rapidly making the Sherman House the most popular hotel in Chicago. While increasing its already uncqualed merits he has also materially reduced its scule of prices.

WHEN WRITING TO ADV >■ ItTI'ERS, pic Sue nay you saw the Advertisement In this paper. COftfl a month to Agents everywhere. Address WeXCKLSIORM'F’G CO.,Buchanan,Mich. tk X o &OA per day at home. Terms Free. Address fDW s- ep-wi/ (jko. SrrNsoN & Co., Portland. Maine. A GENTS WANTED, Men or Women. s3l a I\. week or SIOO forfeited. The Secret Frte. Write at once to CO WEN & CO.. Eighth street. New York. HApnts f antelgSgS »A MONTH—Agents warned every.where.. Business honorable and firstclass. Particulars sent free. Address JOHN WORTH & CO. St, Louis, Mo. 1 A Bc&utlfu 1 TransfcrPictures,instrucA V tion ! & cMaloguf ,10cts. Easily transferred. SGemChromos iOcts. A gent; wanted. J. L. PATTEN A CO., tl PmeSt. N.Y. Cf Oft PER UAH Commission or 830 a week Salary, and expenses. We offer ft and will pay It. Apply now. G. Webber & Co., Marlon, O. g* M to E. D. Ward, High B ridge P. 0., N. Y. Ohll U City, by P. O. money order or registered t» letter, for quick and permanent relief 5 from Chills and Fever without quinine. AV li’ T? 40 AAA Cleared by one AGENT » fi A retailing Clark’s Indelible Pencil formarking clothing. Samples by mall 40 cents. Company’s Box, 141, Northampton, Mass. CONSTANT EMPLOYMENT.—At home, Male or Female. S3O a week warranted. No capital required. Particulars and valuable sample sent free. Address, with tic, return Btamp, C. Ross, Williamsburgh, N. Y. TUfiT 1 MONEY IV IT ~SURE J Just eJL/kjA Bout. Useful, Handsome, Cheap. Sells THE I everywhere. Send for prospectus to IJ/UHI lE. C. BRIDGMAN,S Barclay St.,N.Y., I or 179 West 4th St., Cincinnati, Ohio ftllD “Lathes' Friend” contains 7 articles UUII needed hv every Lady—Patent SpoolHolder, Scissors, Thimble, etc.—guaranteed worth $1.50. Sample Box, by mall, M k Us 50 cents. Agents wanted. PLUMB <6 CO., IN tm f! 108 S. Eighth street, Philadelphia, Pa. W k "VT'TTI f 1 want a P iece of Country 1" Al' J.JE JU l Land, a Stock of Goods, Hotel Property or Village Lot, for which I will give good Unincumbered Chicago Suburban Lots, which are rapidly enhancing in value. Address T. C. LAMB, 125 South Clark street. M A OIP NEEDLE-THREADER, for any sewing IWiHPIW machine. Threads in an instant. Always ready. Only 25c. Also, Impression or Tracing Paper.2Sc. Circulars for ag’ts. Lyman & Co, 222 N.Clark-Bt,Chicago, VnilAlfi KB EM W'mted to learn TelegraphI UII IN (I IN CIN ing aud take offices on new lines which we are furnishing with operators. Salary from *6O to SIOO per month. Particulars mailed free. Address N. W Telegraph Institute, Janesville, Wis. J a DvKKTTftERs: xm. Newspaper Union repreOc ssu-.s uvei 1.500 papers, divided Into 7 subui-. visions. Send 3-cent stamp for Map showing location of papers, with combined and separate lists, giving estimates for cost of advertising. Address S. P. SANBORN, 114 Monroe street, Chicago, 111.

\\ .ew '' \\ Si\o° %o.\tv'vVe. *) \ 'JaXO , CYt\£ ikO. 0 v> r -v , . 11l W.MROi'joN S',

LIVE AGENTS!™ call at 102 East Madison street (Room No. 1, Sd Floor). Chicago. CHASG-CHANG Headquarters. cm t> /V TTT . BUSINESS COLLEGE. All departments of a first-class Business College represented, with the advantages of the most Invigorating climate In the world. For full particulars address PROF, FADBIS, St. Paul. Mirh. O Ffe 0 a 0 a iS MORPHiNE HftBIT speedhy IT H fUi ilfi known A sure Remedy. Jtno cijahgb for treatment until cured. Call on br address DR. J. C. BECK, Cincinnati, O. Which unfolds the thrilling experiences of a veritable Hero, and the curiosities of a wonderful country. More agents wanted 1 . Address LIVINGSTONE PUBLISHERS. either at Cincinnati, Detroit, Chicago, Da*kxpout or St. Louis. AGENTS | oi' Re ßLN?i.uVi.\ 3 WANTED ■EEffIESXUSSi I It A N KLIN, BtEanmEhiia— uu from liiß own wiitlnjrs; and the LIFE OF NAPOLEON i’.GNA* I‘AItTE. These work r are just out. lam oft'erins preat induce* ments to UVe men. Also Agents for Chaxrkrs’ Encyclopedia. and other„|)ublieations frem-tho press of J. B. JLipi'.lncatt A Co. WAHT^slClaric st.', Chicago. iAGENTS 1 HOC RINGER. A 15,000.000 Rhtjppir ——Vw 70,000 Binge i*, 8,500 Tong* Sold. K X'\ Hardware Dealers Sell Them. Linger sl, Kinprs pr 100 r Tonga $1,2/), by mail, post paid, t l) Circulars free. Address U. W. Hill & Co. Decatur, 111, PEI EXTRAORDINARY! No piper in the world offers su h extraordinary Inducements to new subscribers In the way of premiums, books, silverware, presents, etc., as the Louisville Courier-Journal, An old-established, live, wtde-»w-ke. progressive, newsy, bright and, Buicy pap. r. 81'MtOO dlstrib need to Its [nitrons on Ist January. Now is the tfame to subscribe. Circulars with fu : l particulars and specimen copies sent free on application. Terms. $2 a year, and liberal offers to c nb-. Address W. N. H ALU Hsi AN. President .Courier. Journal Company, Louisville, Ky. EPILEPSY OR FITS. A SURE CUKE for this distressing complaint is now made known in a Treatise (of 48 octavo pages) on Foreign and Native Herbal Preparations, published by Dr. O Khelt-s Brown. The prescription wasdiscov—ered by him In such a providential manner that he cannot conscientiously refuse to make H known, as It ; luis cured everybody who has used It for Fils, never i having failed in a single case. The lhgredlents maybe ! obtained from any druggist, A copy.sent free to all ! applicants by mall. AtldresaDr. 0. Phelps Brown, 21 Grand street, Jersey City, N. J. BUSINESSIESSte Wanted In Every more. BP~State Rights, Northwest, for sale. Applicants for rights to manufacture and sell - it should address A. L. Stintson, Purchasing Agent of ( the American Express Company, Chicago. Thiß handy i tool (just patented) Is made entirely of spring steeL ] Sample sent, free of freight charges, on receipt of sl. ; Remittances of money to me for the purchase of tools or any other Goons, in Chicago or New York, will come free of express charges. A. L. STIMSOX. FOR .DEARLY THIRDS YEARS THE ! RICHMOND PRINTS Have beenne~.fi in high esteem by those who use a Calico They are produced ill all the no-eltles of changing fashions, atid in conservative styles suited to the wants of many persons. Among the latter are the “STANDARD GRAY STYLES,” Proper for the house or street—beautiful in designs and pleasing in coloring “ Chocolate Standard Styles, ” j In great variety, and widely .known :.s most services- 1 Me prints. Nothing better for daily wear. These goods : bear tirLux as qua ■<i alior*. Your retailer should have them,and your exam (ration and approval will coincide. ] . IUM AGElrfs READ THIS! L I Hid John Paul la'one of the brightest of ni|M our humorists, aad it is very f-lc tea r AUL O' predict that his book will be a remark? * RfiniY publican. ** ■tvlVi The book has been demanded by a public clamor oo general to be disregarded.—A. FI Tribune. Was it Sbakkfiesre or Bacon w ho said of John Paul's new book—'“• There'a magic in the ureb of Uf"—N. Y. Graphic. John Panl's Book will be a clever one, for its author touches nothing that he does not adorn .—Rrooltyn A ■ ts melt will be a pleasant, attractive volume.— Harper’s RVfl ly. For an agency for this book, address COLUMBIAN BOOK CO., liu Washington street, Chicago, lIL j

Caution. On account of the popularity of the Wheeler & Wilson Sewing Machines, parities have been'largely engaged in purchasing old and second-hand machines of that make, and imposed upon the public by selling them as new machines. The Wheeler & Wilson Company begs to advise the public that any one desiring to buy their second-hand machines can be supplied by that Company direct, on better terms than others can afford them, and be assured of what they are buying. Address WHEELER & WILSON MPG CO, 625 Broadway, New York.

lour Adjustable Mold in every "town and city in the United States. It sells well and Is Just what every house needs. Itlsthe only Invention In the world that will positively prevent rain, cold, snow and dust from coming under door bottoms. Carpenters make lots of money handling It. Send atonce for onr circular. WILSON, PEIRCE A Co., Sole Manufacturers, 183 Clark St., Chicago.

WE WANT AGENTS AGENTS AGENTS AGENTS AGENTS

STEINWAY GranS, Sdnare anft Upriaht Pianos. Superior to all other*. Every Piano Warranted for Five Years. Illustrated Catalogues, with Price List, mailed free on application. STEINWAY A SONS, Nos. 107,109 & ill East 14th Street, New York. B UNHAM PXAFTOB. Dunham & Sons, Manufacturers, Warerooms, 18 EastUth Street, [Established 1834.] MEW YORK. Send for Illustrated Circular and Price List. the only Self-Threaaing Machine, i£3HH| SELF -“liSADwl WIIHHIIRKI SHUTTLE AOENTS ■VST-yXJKrl’TfellD. if AMERICAN SEWING MACHINE CO jl__J| 343 Wabash Avenue, Chicago. KSmhKBI

AGENTS WANTED FOR THE TRUE HISTORY OF THUS BROOKLYN. SCANDAL The astounding revelations and startling disclosures made in this workarecreatlngthe most intense deelre in the minds of the people to obtain it. It gives the whole inner history o f the Great Scandal and is the only full and authentic work on the subject. It sells at sight. Send for terms to Agents and a full description of the work. Address NATIONAL PUBLISHING CO., Chioago, 111., or St. Louis, Mo. R. P. HALL’S t GpMECTJLMI y jrtagA \ is imbedded in a medicated / ydHsSUfi®|Sv\ plaster, and when applied to / A»Bt|Baßf|a|aiHßx \ the limit produces a con- ( \slant current, of electricity, IK. SSSSt- a* 1 forming the most powerful V J remedial agent for the cure \ / of Rheumatism, Neuralgia, \ y Sciatica. Headache,Sprains, - -= Spinal Difficulty, Nervous - Female Weakness ever known. Its effects are magical. Sold by Druggists, o ■ sent by mall on receipt of 50 cents. Address A. lI.'TAYLOR, No. 4 Tribune Building, CHICAGO, General Agent for the West THE “FAMILY FAVORITE.*’ DURABLE. RELIABLE. fijPfc^CTtr Made of the best materials, parts interchangeable and few in number, easily learned, doing a great variety of work without extraattachments. We emphatically deny the statements made by agents of other machines concerning our and our busir ness standing. m Serai Wine Co., 153 State St., Chicago, 111 THE ohlm[eler THE CHEAPEST AND BEST PAPER IN THE COUNTRY. ANNUM Unexcelled by any Weekly Literary Publication, East or West. CANVASSERS WANTED IN EVERY TOWN IN THE UNITED STATES. The most Liberal Premiums and Club Bates ever offered by any newspaper. Write for a Circular containing full information, etc. Specimen copies furnished on application. Address THE LEDGER COMPANY. CHICAOO. ILu. JUST PUBLISHED: PIANO at HOME A large collection of the best FOUR-HAND PIECES FOR THE PIANO-FORTE. No book Is better fitted for “ Home" Musical entertainment than this. Beginners can play the easier duets. Advanced players and teachers need not to be told that practice with four hands is the very best to acquire “time” and “certainty.” Practice In the “ Piano at Home" Is nothing but a continual pleasure. 250 pages, full sheet music size. In boards, $2.50; doth, $&(»; lull gilt, $4.00. Fob Choirs: THE LEADER. Price $1.38. Fob Binging Schools: THE SONG MONARCH, 75c. THE EMERSON METHOD — FOR REED ORGANS By L. O. Emerson and W. S. B. Matthews. Easy and progressive lessons, scales, studies, voluntaries, interludes, quartets, songs and other pieces in profusion. All well arranged by skillful hands. Price Fob Choirs : PERKINS’ ANTHEM BOOK. $1.50. Fo* Quartet Choirs: THOMAS’ QUARTETS. S2LSOL Specimen copies sent post-paid for retail prices , OUTER DITSON & CO, CHAS. BL DITSON k 05, Boston. 711 Broadway, N. Y.

A 4 4 OA A 1 1 A „ A DOUBLE BARREL GUY; warranted real English G* |a. f-wl ft VnAT I VTIYI twist barrels, patent breech, a good shooter, with Flask, UiXAi VV ka/JLiVs U V 4 UJLAs Pouch and Wad-cutter. Seat C. O. p., with privilege to ex- ” amine before paying bill, upon paving express charges both wavs toexpress agent. Seu« stamp for particular* to Rudolph A Co., Gun dealers, 101 bN. sth St., St Louis, Mo.

1875.— Postpaid.—S 1 .60. THE NURSERY. A Monthly Magazine for Youngett Reader*. 8uPEitßi.v I ttusTBATED. f3T*Send_ ten cepw for. Sample Number. Subscribe 50W(1S1) and get the last two numbers of this year FREE I JOHN L. SHOREY, • 36 ’ Bromfield Street, Boston.

till Dr. J. Walker’s CalifonuaVliiegar Bitters are a purely Vegetable preparation, made chiefly from the native herbs found an the lower ranges of the Sierra Nevada mountains of California, the medicinal properties of which are extracted therefrom without the use of Alcohol. The question is almost daily asked, “What is the cause of the unparalleled success of Vinegar Bitters?” Our answer is, that they remove the Cause of disease, and tho patient recovers his health. They are the great blood purifier and a life-giving principle, a' perfect Renovator and Invigorator of the system. Never before in the history of the world has a medicine been compounded possessing tho remarkable qualities of Vinegar Bitters in healing tha 6ick of every disease man is heir to. They are a gentlo Purgative as well as a Tonic, relieving Congestion or Inflammation of the Liver and Visceral Organs, in Bilious Diseases. The properties of Dp.. Walker’s Vinegar Bitters are’Aperient, Diaphoretic, Carminative, Nutritions. LaxativerDiuretic, Sedative, Counter-Irritant, Sudorific, Alterative. and Anti-Bilious. R. h. McDonald & co., Druggists and Gen. Agts.. San Francisco, Californio, and cor. of Washington and Charlton Sts.. Jf. Y Sold by all Drnggists and Dealers.

I1AS0H& HAMLIN CABINET ORGANS. * Winners of THREE HIGHEST MEDALS ajtd DIPLOMA OF HONOR at VIENNA, 1873, PARIS 1807. and In AMERICA ALWAYS: Declared by MUSICIANS GENERALLY to be UNRIVALED and INCOMPARABLE. Sold at fixed uniform prices to all, which are printed and invariable. PURCHASERS OP ORGANS ARE REMINDED that the temptation to Dealer* and Peddlers is very strong to deal In and recommend as best the organß of those makers who will pay them the largest commissions or discounts for selling. The “MASON Si HAMLIN ORGAN CO.. printing as they do their lowest prices, can afford to dealers only the smallest commissions. This plan secures to every purchaser the fewest price, because the dealer cannot ;tsk more than the Catalogue price: but It causes many dealers to do their best to sell other organs, simply because they get enormous discounts on them. Some organs are,, currently sold to dealers at seventy-five per cent, discount, or at onequarter the prices printed for them. As a rule, the poorer the organ the higher its printed price and the greater the discount on It. The MASON Si HAMLIN ORGAN CO. are now offering new styles, with Important Improvements, and are selling not only For cash exclusively, but also on new plans of easy payments, running through one year or longer. They also rent new organs with privilege of purchase. Rent paid three years purchases the Organ. Send for the Illustrated Catalogues and Circulars ; which give very full information and arc sent free, address: THE MASON Si HAMLIN ORGAN COAT EITHER New York, Boston or Chicago. SOLDIERS,JTTEHTIOI l UNITED STATES CLAIM AGENCY Authorized l>y U. S. Government* Pensions and Bounties. Every soldier who was disabled while In the service of the Republic, either by wouuds. broken limbs, accidental Injuries, hernia or rupture, loss of eyesight or diseased eyes or was broken down in the service by exposure or hardships incident to camp life and field duty, or where disease of the lungs has been contracted In the service, when the result and sequence of other diseases, such as pneumonia, retrocession or falling back of the measles, or where the phthisis pulmonalls is the direct result of the exposure of camp life, or diseases of the bowels, such as chronic diarrhoea and the like. Every soldier who has thus been disabled is entitled to an Invalid Pension Even the loss of a finger entitles a soldier to a pension. All widows and children of soldiers dying in the service, or after they were discharged, oa account of wounds received or disease contracted In the service, are also entitled to a pension. Special Attention Given to Claim* for Increase of Invalid Pensions. J fore than half who are now drawing a pension are justly entitled to an Increase. My terms are: No Charge* made For Advice* And no fee ever asked unless successful In collecting your claims. I also take up claims that have been rejected In the hands of other attorneys, and prosecute to a successful issue. A BOOK FOB EVERY SOLDIER. Thlsbook is devoted strictly to the welfare and interest of all soldiers and pensioners, containing the regulations relating to Army and Navy Pensions, the new Pension Laws. It gives a complete list of all the latest Bounty and Pension laws, thus enabling each soldier to see at once the exact amount of bounty or pension he should receive. PRICE S 3 CENTS. Circulars free. Address all, communications (with Stamp), B. F. PRITCHARD, 77 E. Washington St,, Indianapolis, Ind.

Av A Presenter Every BoywodGirl 1 WHO SOBSCUBIS TO THE * YOUNG FOLKS' NEWS. 1 f A Bright little Paper for the Young, I I with Handsome Illustrations. I Published Weekly at $1.25 per year. I I The paper la Livelyf Entertaining, .1 / and Instructive, yet not forgetting a |f Jl share of Innocent Fun and Frolie. if) rag This happy boy comes to young people with good news—telling them that anv one who send* £1.25 to Mr. Alfred Martien, Philadelphia, will not only get a copyeverv week fora whole vear of that nice little paper, TftE YOUNG FOtKS’ NEWS, with the postage paid, but will also receive a beautiful OU Chromo Picture, taking their choice of four handsome Chromes, called: “A Frolic In tbe Woods,” “Tbe Boal Race,” “Getting Ready for Sea,” and “The Shipwreck?’ Or, If they will send 25 cents more—that is, £1.50 altogether—they will get with tbe paper the picture varnished and mounted on a cardboard ready for framings or Sl-75 will procure two Chromos mounted and the paper for due year, portage paid • or 82.25 will procure the four Chromes mounted and the naper for ono wear, postage paid. Mounted Chromos will please best ’ SEND A THP.EE-CENT STAMP FOR A SPECIMEN NUMBER. ALFRED 9IARTIEN, Publisher, 21 South Seventh Street, Philadelphia.'

TiTATTm? COUNTRY Ll\D AGENTS NUilLlj. a^wWrn Can realise a few thousand doll-ire, very quick, by trading and selling oar Missouri Lands and Unincumbered Chicago Suburban Lots: For full particulars ad,dress, with stamp. LandOfflcc, LBS. Clark-st,Hoorn7A A. V K 484-Q, K. T'HIS PAPER Is Printed noth hyG. B. KANE A CO.. 12U>e*rbx'rnm. Chicago Kor sale by A. N. KnLLtw* 11 Jagkson SU, Chicago ■t i £