Rensselaer Union, Volume 2, Number 36, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 2 June 1870 — Rules for Making Yourself Miserable. [ARTICLE]

Rules for Making Yourself Miserable.

Rule I.—Get up late in the morning, so as not to have time, to eat a wholesome breakfast before going to your business. Rule 2.—Rush at once to the ears, where you will sit from half an hour to an hour in an unventilated room, before reaching 'your place of business. Rule 3.—Wear a pair of tight boots, and allow your feet to get cold as soon as possible. Rule 4 —Eat peanuts, smoke vile cigars, drink worse brandy or whisky, between breakfast and dinner. Rule 5. —Lunch at a restaurant on baker’s bread, soggy potatoes, mince pie, and as many other abominations as you can. • Rule 6.—Do all your business in such a haste as to use up all your strength faster than it is manufactured by the process of digestion and assimilation 1 . Rule 7—Eat a hearty dinner at six o’clock of indigestible compound, neither nourishing nor healthful. Rule B.—Retire late, so you cannot possibly recuperate for another day’s work in the time allotted for sleep.— Herald of Health.