Rensselaer Union, Volume 1, Number 52, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 23 September 1869 — NASBY. [ARTICLE]

NASBY.

[From the Toledo Blade.] MIL N ASBY TAKES A LOOK OVER THE POLITICAL HORIZON AND GIVES THE RESULT THEREOF. Mock Chunk, wich is in the State I uv Puausilvmiy, Sept. U. 1869. ) At last I hev struck a haven nr. rest. At last I hev a shoor abidin place, for a tone at least. How long I may stay, or how soon I may be compelled to pick up my landlord’s'spare shirt and travel, I can’t tell. But wat do I care? For the present I am under the wing uv a man who hez twenty millions uv dollars, and who is yoosin it at* terrific rate. Some few uv the drops uv the golden shower is a fallin onto me, and lam content. That is, lam content personally. lam ez well off ez I cud be. I hev twice penetrated the august presence, uv the Democratic candidate for Governor uv Pennsilvany, representin myself ez President uv a Democratic club in Philadelphy. and .twice have! received a hundred dollars to carry on the good work. The young man wich guards the outer door uv the candidatorial manshen is a most acoot judge uv human nacher. The Servant at the door askt for credenshels, at wscli the younj* man who happened to Kin the hall, noticin me, rebuked him me. “ Torence!" remarkt he sharply, “ admit all sich noses without question. Yoo bet they are our friends.” ~ That nose hez cost me-, thousands uv other people’s dollars io keep it np in color. Thank Heaven, its repay! n me some uv the trouble I hev gone to on its account. I am well enuff off, and possibly oqght to be satisfied, but the condishen uv the Dimocrisy afflix me. The fact iz, we are in a bad way, and ther ain’t no way out uy it. We ain’t got no yoonanimity—we ain’t got nothin to lite for, and the country her. hed universally good crops. The weather’s bin agin us. Es we cood hev hed. nun in the harvest enuff to hev rustid the wheat, and emiff folterln the wheat harvest to hev rotted the pertaters, and then a juicy attack uv the cholera and yellow fever, and other disorders uv that nacher, ad that the people cood "hev got dissatisfied and ugly and sich, ther wood hev bin some hope for us. The potato rot in western Pennsylvany wood hev made thousands uv rates this fall alone. But wat’s the yoose uv talkin to farmers with teers in yoor eyes uv a country goin to rooin, when every mother’s son uv em hev ther pockets stuffed with green bax and a barn full uv wheat to bring more ? Wat’s the yoosqv clamorin for change when the country’sdoin ez well ez it kin anyhow? TWn agin, our mahagement hez bin fttteftiL In Oh|o t we made a boggle at the beginnin, in tye nonien%shen uv Rose

crans. ft Wtun’t In Che ntcher tro things for our patttota who had shot officers sent out by this Roaaprana to arraal their sons which hed taken bounty and hed deserted to Canady, to vote for Koaocranz, partlklerly ez hundreds jty em hed bin dragged to Bastites for emfftyln their rifles at em. The hurrahs stuck in their throats. I must confess that they made a brave attempt nt it, but- they looked sick while they did it Their efforts to hurrah for Rosecrans, and the face they made uv it reminded me uv an incident which occurred to m< wunst I hed a friend whose name it was Brown, who wtiz given to indulgence in the flowin bole to a foarfol extent. Wun nite heattempted to be convivyel on a new brand uv whisky, and it floored him. At 11 P. M. I found him clingin to a lamp post and vomitin ez tho ther wuz a minatoor earthquake into his insides. “ Brown !” remarked I, Jayin my hand affectionately onto his shoulder, “ Brown are you sick ?’’ “Sidt/ Sick!” replied he, swfaigin around to the other side uv the post and dischargin another avalanch. “Bick! h—l! do yoo think I’m doln this for the fun ay the thing?” Qnr Democrats in Ohio swnllcred Rosecrans, but their burrrhs were ho much, like the retchin uv a man with a load onto his stumick, that it reminded me uv my friend Brown. In Pennsylvania we aint much better off Our candidate hez pints about him. He wuz a copperhcd doonn the war, wich makes all uv that class uv Democrats enthoosiastic in his support; but on tother hand it drives off the W’ar Democrats, without wich we aint worth shucks. He hes money though, and ex he’s bleedin freely, he may keep the organizaahen alive till we kin make a fitc with a man wich we kin elect. The principle trouble is however to find out wat Democracy is at this juncter. Iq . Ohio its agin nigger ekality and in favor uv either payin off the bonds' in greenbacks or repudiashun ; in Tennessee it’s nigger suffrage and nigger offis holdin; in Connecticut its payin, the bonds in gold, interest and principles : in Californy its anti-Chinese, and in Louisiana, its Chinese. In Maine our people arc runnin a perhibertory likker law, and everywhere else they’re for free whisky. In Illinois, Democracy is free trade; in Pennsilvany, its high protective tariff'and so on around. In snort its so high mixed that I woodent agree to go from one county to another to make speeches, without having first carefully ascertained wot the Democracy uv that pertikeler county believed in. I got Democratic papers from all the States one day, and by persistent reading uv em for five hours, I became so mixed as to be a promisin candidate for a loonatic Asylum. I slid stay wher I am so long ez there is anything to be got out uv the posishen. I heV personated a Cheerman uV Philadclfy - Committees twice with success; to-morrow I slid try it agin, and after that sieh other characters as may occur to me. I must make hay while the sun shines, for theTurious assaults onto Packer’s pile is redoosin it fearfully. < Petroleum V. Nasbv Wich wnz Postman’ - tar.