Rensselaer Union, Volume 1, Number 42, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 15 July 1869 — The Power of Sulkiness. [ARTICLE]

The Power of Sulkiness.

T OrxaKU the power of sulkiness. FewfoKWtorft’e “#o»fd, it rarfly.eilsu in 4ts highest and moat concentrated form, fdn Miami ted to reaHnteUectual or- moral force, it wpuldbe so thorough as to bo iqjuriob# the general wtofareof humanity- * But in atmaand more ignoble form It is npt übcomjn° n » and the deadmake upau almoiM-.fotoforuhic There are people who have the gift of being sulky ror ap indefinite length of time, and assert that they stet thus on principle; but it is almost invariably found- that the principle harmonize# with the nature, for to tempers that are shOtt and sweet, hot,, inconsistent, or quickly placable, -r-and any of these are liable to be suddenly vexed for-an.hour or two,— jt. is always a difficulty to sulk. It is a bit of acting, and not reality, even when carried out, and the assumption of it is felt to be & burden too heavy to be borne.

• Tke capacity, for steady, splld, concentrated sulkiness is a mighty povrer to him who posupftrtttfeimplies many curious and yarap acaSHfllshmenta and gifts, among dUfcf s thaSorthe complete mastery of the five Sensed It is for a man to hfc blind' when it is desired that he should .open his eyes, dumb., whenever words would be acceptable, deaf tp all allurements.OT submission, insensible to every effort at conciliation. It can create gloom, and, having created it, it*: Can perpetuate and deepen it until it becomes a clinging atmosphere as unwholesome as a malaria. It comprehends an absolute control over the facial muscles. • ) that no softness or sign of yielding, not a ripple of a smile or an exoression of pleasure, may replace even for a mofoent the sullen apathy or illumine the habitual foowJ of the confirmed sulker. : Jn a word, it is the faculty of simu’i&tion to such a degree that a person shall appear to be blind, deaf, dumb, atnrii<V, paralyzed, ill, or dead, whenever and for as long as be chooses. Mr. He ' '•Tuly said, “ Unreason ft Or ays governs. Nothiiyi^revents. your having your own way Bomwah Ji: Wlng at all amenable to reason.” Ana sulkiness neither gives rea.sons nos listens to them. The sulky being sometimes wears % depressed, spiritless, .and utterly detected appearance, as though crushed and- heartbroken »y long-contin-ued oppression; sometimes a heavy, displeased, dragging stepAqnffa black and lowering brow are the chief signs which indicate the disturbance within*, and the form of -the vengeance which is to be taken in-respect of it. The litter is the masculine type; the former is, properly speaking, feminine. Mr. N. P. WiUis, in one of his earlier volumes, has- a clever litle tale, describing the power of an *‘ injured jook.” Byflrtue of it a young American lady contrived to persuade a whole house full of boarders to regard her ana martyr, afid'to speak the worst an.d think the worst they could of her husband; and all this, without uttering one word herself was produced solely by the “injured look.” And if there is an “injuredlook” there is also such a thing as a “dumb devil”; if the power of the one is great, the provocation induced by the latteT is unutterable. It is a curious, and to some will appear an unaccountable .circumstance that in sulkiness a woman is more often possessed with a dumb devil than is a man. Bulkiness is visible even in the nursery, where it exists, so to speak, in the form of a bud; but it is merely an outbreak of bad temper, for at that age a child has not learned the method of using it as an instrument with which to punish his playmates. And the wisest way is to leave it entirely unnoticed, “efface” the offender, as thfl French say, until there is an obvious return to a more amiable disposition. But boys and gukeocm learn to estimate the power of Sulkiness, either by practice or endnrence, and a large school is the best check on a datpCAum of this kind. Sulkiness is not a tyranny which.can be safely exercised !h society at large, and it is commonly reserved for private or.home exhibition. The smaller the circle the more concentrated its force; in & family, in a house, in one room, the power of sulkiness Oppresses, searches, and pervades every corner of it. Ip love-making sulkiness is a deplorable blunder. Smile or strike, or smile and strike, too, if that seems more advisable; but no good ever follows a sul-. len enmity, which chills, disconcerts, and often actually destroys. love. Even that simulated sulkiness, thhr toothless vengeance, which consists in pouting coldnesss, is an experiment fall of danger, and in the worst possible taste. But if between lovers it is jg&under, in married life it ,is simply the'greatest madness of which a human bpiffg can be guilty. There they are man and women yoked together like goats, and as the countryman justly observed, “ that’s been a trouble to more than goats,” and if either of them Is endowed with the faculty of persistent sulkiness, one shudders to think of the life the other one may be made to lead. It might be reasonably urged as a cause for judicial separation, possibly even for divorce, since the practice Of quietly pressing the spirit and Jife out of a human being', no matter how many years the operation spreads over, is not one that ought to be permitted in a Christian country: “ vse victis I” the weak go to the wall, and too often the week are -the pleasantest and most lovable of earth’s creatures. Somjßimee a person is seen to exhibit something which resembles and yet Is not sulks. It is a silent moodiness of manner arising from a sense of failure, mortification, or secret discouragemciit and vexationpvhich he cannot get oyer all at once. It is often seen id youth, but in reality the man is struggling with his infirmity, and a kind word or a friendly overture will almost always, float him over the difficulty. But genuine sulkiness is essentially premeditated and of a forethought; jt is also vindictivo, sometimes even malignant, in Its nature, and if much indulged in causes, the manners to be habitually morose,, and the face and person acquire a heavy, Midden appearance as of a substance too long steeped In unwholesome juices. Dragging the fret along the floor and slamming the doors of thenouse for weeks and months together / are vulgar and ignoble but neither nnoommon nor inexpressive modes of aulhtof* We oil-know of other ways morAqnflned, tat not less disagreeable, and remembe/ ; them too well. The fashion in which the very few words which custofn and convenience render absolutely necessary are dropped from the Ups as if they were so many leaden bullets; the stredfast, surprised stare that you or any one else should veoture to ask such questions as shall require reply of * any kind, the pertinacious coldness, the carefully averted glance, the steady gloom, the hand withheld, the smile onreturned, and the hardly muttered acknowledgment bf the morning or eve-

ning salutiori,—who that has witnessed or endured these amenities can forget the effect of them?'.ln fact, the severity of the^pressure* which a really able, discriminating, and obstinate aulker can bring; to Hear on others for indefinite space‘of time amounts to a tyranny, dumb, indeed, but sufficiently unholy of its kind ; : neither soft coaxing nor urgent crushing can affect it, and, though to yield is humiliating, it is well nigh hopeless to resist it.—Pw MM QaietU.