Rensselaer Union, Volume 1, Number 34, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 20 May 1869 — MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS. [ARTICLE]

MISCELLANEOUS ITEMS.

What is the usual result of a runaway match? A pa(r) done (pardon.) What sort of carpenter is most unhealthy ? A palling (an abing) one. Tigs is my “ impression,” as the printer said when he kissed his sweetheart - Four villages in Prussia tave been united by royal decree, and will hereafter bear the name of Bismarkdorf. A grindstone which was sent to England in a bale of cotton has come back to the old plantation in a ca>k of sugar. “Pa, what ia the use at giving our pigs so much milk ?” “So that they may make hogs of themselves, darling.” A special mission has in charge the work of planting a Young Man’s Christain Association at every "important station on the Pacific Railroad. 3 - A dbcobbolate husband of Lyons, France, whose wife had deserted him", sent ten barrels of flour to the pious poor of the city, soliciting their prayers that the truant might not return. Henby Ward Bmmcheb recently baptized a large number of candidates for membership into his church, but he made the ladies remove their false curls and chignons before they went down to the water. A Frenchman brought two mugs to the milkman in place of one, as usual, and ou being asked the meaning of it, replied : “ Dis vor te milch, and dis vor te vater ; an’ I vill mix them so as to soote myself.” A good story is told of an Englishman who boasted to an Indian that the sun never set upon the territory of his countrytaen “Ugh!” exclaimed the-Spotted Tail, “Great Spirit afraid to trust Engglishmen in the dark.” At Attleborough, Mass., a kind hearted gentleman has made provirions for tbe comfort of the elderly ladies who spend the intermission at church, by furnishing them with tea, sugar and milk, and all the apparatus necessary to a social sup for dinner. A ruminative individual, hearing for tbe first time the -quotatfbn, “Alt tbe world’s a stage,” expressed his lack of wonder at accidents being of daily occurrence among the passengers, as the stage turned over every twenty-four hour* The Swiss Government wished to employ women as telegraphers. On learning that operators would be sworn to absolute secresy, many of those who had applied, for situations withdrew, saying that that Was requiring altogether too much. Mr. Carpenter, of the American Velocipede Club, in New York, rides, standing, vrith both feet in the saddle, and propels the machine by “wabbling” the front wheel; gi? 'ing it a-serpentine movement. ‘He rides ride-saddle, with his hands behind his-back, and turns right and left with perfect freedom and grace, The Yosemite valley is thickly dotted, with the ruins of Aztec or Toltic cities and fortifications, in some of which timbers exposed to the storms and blazing sun of that trying climate are yet to be seen, in a good state of preservation, showing that the builders must have disappeared at a comparatively recent date. jGbobge Francis Train may get himself into trouble again. He recently called Adem (Eve’s husband) a sneak. As several of that gentleman’s descendants are still living and may object to this kind of aspersion of any of their most renowned ancestors, George F. may find himself involved in a suit for slander or libel— Gautte. A curious physiological experiment has recently been made. A few grains of barley were placrd before a hungry pigeon. While pecking at the barley the brain of the pigeon was f-ozen by means of a spray of e’her. The bird, being thus deprived of cojbclous-jcts, c??sed pecking, and remain'd as if dead. The barley was then removed, aid tbe'ether spray having ceas'd, the biain wrs allowed to thaw. The b’rd isoa re.,’rned to life, and its first ac-; wrs to renew the pecking for a time, although no food was before it. A mew instrument called a baroscope, is realizing a large tale. It comes to Paris from Havana, it is said to prognosticate the weather twenty-four hours in advance by changes in tbe fluid cont -incd in a tube. To make one, take a glass tube a foot long and thr s and one-tb’rd inches in circumference; fill it with the following liquid: Camphor, two parts; saltpetre, one part; disc lived in alcohol and partially piccipi’ .ted with d'stilied water. Then close the tube and p’acs it in the air toward the north, and out of the sun. You will then observe tbe following barometric phenomena. For fine weather, the liquor in the tube w l'l be transpirent; for rain, there will be ciystaliz: d u*xs floating about in the liquid; for a tempest, the liquid will be fail of-'eryst Is, in an apparent state of ferment; for wind, the crystals will adhere to the aide of the tube from which the wind Is going to blow. : Thia simple invention is more certain and cheaper than any other barometer in use.