Rensselaer Union, Volume 1, Number 7, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 November 1868 — Wit and Humor. [ARTICLE]

Wit and Humor.

—A Florence poet, Felippo Calcani, has written an ode to garlic. Its odor is strong enough to suggest the ode. —Punch says a chimney sweep should beagood whist-player, because he is always following soot. —“l’m sitting on the style, Mary,” said the envious young girl as she plunged down on her sister’s hat and feathers. —Mrs. Persimmons regards with concern the increase of the cattle plague, and sympathetically wonders if her husband will escape it. —A young lady who was visiting a country that is rather * ‘difficult in,the matter of fences, informs us that she is not acclimbatized, A West street, New York, lager beer saloonist posts a notice: “No money dent in sums less than $1,000,000 under any circumstances," —“Know thyself is a grecian maxim. The advantage of carrying it out is, that you will always have an acquaintance at hand, if it is’nt quite so gorgeous. ■ Bev. Dr. Bond of Baltimore, reports that when in Boston l|g *° church, where lie heard music which made him wonder how he got in without a ticket. • ■ —A hard drinking man in one of the ■New England states justifies his conduct by quoting General Washington’s example. “General Washington !” said one of his friends', “where did you ever hear he drank?” “Sparks says so in his life of him,” answered the man: “he says that the General used to go into the woods to ruminate for an hour?' —A certain literary gentleman, wishing to be undisturbed one day, instructed his Irish servant to admit no one, -and if any one should inquire for him to give him an “equivocal answer.” Night came, and the gentleman proceeded to interrogate Pat as to his callers. , “Did any one call ?” “Yis, aur, wan gintieman." “What did he say ?” He axed was yer honor in.” “Well, what tell him?” “Sure, I gave him a quivikle ansur jist” ’ “How was “I axed him was his grandwpther a monkey !”