Rensselaer Standard, Volume 1, Number 2, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 28 June 1879 — How his Trousers Got Shortened. [ARTICLE]

How his Trousers Got Shortened.

A certain gentleman purchased a pair of pants a few days ago, which, upon being tried on at home, he found to be too long. That night he remarked to his wife that he wished her to take off about an inch from each leg, which would make them about the desired length. Being fond of teasing her husband she told him. that she shouldn’t do any thing of the kind, and he retired without having obtained a promise from her that she would attend to the matter. Soon after he had left for his room, however, she, as a matter of course, clipped off the superfluous inch, as she had been asked to do. The family is composed of six female members, and each one of the five, who were in the adjoining rooms, heard the dispute between man and wife, and after the latter had taken off the required inch and retired, the old lady, desiring to “keep peace in the family,” and not knowing what her daughter-in-law had done, cautiously slipped in the room and cut off another inch. In this way did each of the five ladies, unknown to the other, and’ all with the praisworthy object of preventing any misunderstanding between the couple, clip an inch from the gentleman’s trousers. The following morning all unconscius of what had taken place during the night, he rolled up his pants in a piece of paper, and took them to the tailor to be shortened to the desired length. Upon a hasty glance the latter ventured the opinion that they were already short, but the owner insisted that they were fully an inch to long. The tailor had no more to say, and our friend retired. On the following Saturday he called for his pants and took them home, and was supremely disgusted at finding that the legs reached only a trifle below the knee. He straightway accused the tailor, but his wife heard him, and came to the rescue, explaning that she had taken an inch from each of the legs and her acknowledgment was followed by that of each of the five ladies, when it was discovered that altogether the legs had been shortened to the extent of seven inches.—[Allentown Chronicle.