Rensselaer Republican, Volume 27, Number 38, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 28 May 1896 — Latest News From the Infernal Regions. [ARTICLE]

Latest News From the Infernal Regions.

Hades Times:—H. H. Holmes arrived here Thursday night on the Phantom express. He was enroute to the Bottomless Pit. In an interview with one of our reporters, Holmes said: This reminds me of Pittsburg. It is an air-tight cinch. It looks unique and no doubt is pleasant in winter time. But there is one great mistake about it, your fire escapes are defective. An agent selling Holmes’ confession was boiled in oil yesterday by order of the supreme court of satan. The Hades bicycle club made a century run yesterday, stopping briefly at Hammond for devilment. Hammond is one of his majesty’s great supply plants. Scott Jackson will be introduced to Pharoah’s daughter, who got a head of John the Baptist. Scott had a similar experience in the Pearl Bryan affair. They ought to make a hot dance on live wires and redheaded tacks .—Chesterton Tribune.